Posted:
I’m saying this again…you write so well that I can actually visualise the scenes. And I am loving this suspense. Please please do complete the story as and when you get time.
Will surely complete this
I’m saying this again…you write so well that I can actually visualise the scenes. And I am loving this suspense. Please please do complete the story as and when you get time.
Will surely complete this
In one word.... Awesome....beautifully written.
....I am in court....reading this in middle of a case and waiting for the case to be heared...... I have to wear a coat in this scorching heat.. The heat wave is going on in our country.....some people died from heat stroke....Really this time in sunmer tempreture is high...so everybody take care of yourself....
So sweet of you... Yes, the heat is unbearable... Take care of yourselves ❤️
Originally posted by: PSharada
This was so nice. I would have absolutely loved if the creatives introduced Surya in this manner without having Binni the Tinni or Raghu in the mix. They could have not had Reddy family also. Maybe Surya could be an orphan and we could have had Chaudhary family only on the show. The way you are weaving the story - it's beautiful. Surya is really the man of his words. Can't wait for how the Chaudhary's react to the truth unveiling.
Absolute beautiful part Shree. Thanks for the tag.
So happy that you're enjoying the story ❤️
Kya likhti ho Shree behan!
I am so exhausted with all the traveling, shifting and everything else.. I am reading this, even before watching aaj ka episode.. And this gave me such a respite...
Garmi me baarish karke, mitti ki khushboo, de di tumne..
From sketching Arjun and Raghu into the story, to even having Alka doing her shenanigans, you are really weaving an intriguing tale..
And Imlie ke pyaar me, ye wala Rowdy Reddy bhi kaafi jaldi phisalne wala hai...
I can see him falling in looouuuveeee, and blushing like an idiot!
Looking forward to more of this detectivegiri..
Tell me, Is Arjun going to be the Watson to Surya's Sherlock? or will it be Imlie?
Noo, you da best!!!
@Bold: hayeee!!! You're too much 🫣
Arjun is such a cutie, usse add karne ka mann kar gaya... 
and ek useless cop chahiye tha to who better than thangaballi Raghu
Yes, ladke ko already aisa dhak dhak horela hai...
Arjun and Tripathy will both kinda be the Watson and Mrs Hudson to Surya's Sherlock
That was an amazing update yrr the way Surya working on August ka case here.. Show mein iska 0.01 % bhi Nahin dikhaya he was in uniform ginke 2 baar lol but alas loved Surya Arjun conversation and how the investigation going.
And wow the revelation of surya being August twin brother in front of Surya was amazing i could feel sai nailing the scenario but show mein toh it was blah.. But here just loved it.
Imlie being imlie.. She can't see anyone in pain. The way she was concerned for surya and helped him was good.. Will be waiting for next update🤩❤
That was an amazing update yrr the way Surya working on August ka case here.. Show mein iska 0.01 % bhi Nahin dikhaya he was in uniform ginke 2 baar lol but alas loved Surya Arjun conversation and how the investigation going.
And wow the revelation of surya being August twin brother in front of Surya was amazing i could feel sai nailing the scenario but show mein toh it was blah.. But here just loved it.
Imlie being imlie.. She can't see anyone in pain. The way she was concerned for surya and helped him was good.. Will be waiting for next update🤩❤
I wished for a better reaction to the twin revelation in the show, it felt wrong ki Surya ko kuch DDP nhi hua until he saw Agastya ka video, so thought it should be this way in the FF...
So glad you liked it... ❤️
Hey guys, here's part 5 of this Surlie FF with a lot more detectivegiri, changing dynamics and some revelations... DISCLAIMER: Back in the game of fiction writing after a decade, so har baar ki tarah expectations low rakhna... 
Here goes nothing...
AJEEB DASTAAN HAI YE...
CHAPTER 5
*Flashback Continues*
A sudden flicker of determination ignited within him. ‘This is no time to be weak,’ Surya thought. The truth, however ugly, has finally been brought to light. The rest of the Chaudharys and Imlie deserve to know it too.
The path ahead may seem to be a labyrinth of deceit and shattered identities, but he will navigate it fearlessly. He owed it to himself... to Imlie... and most importantly, to his brother, Agastya!
Surya took a deep breath and raised his eyes to find a distressed lookingImlie still hovering over him with a bottle of water and some cookies. He gave her a reassuring smile. “I’m fine, Imlie. But there’s something you and the rest of the Chaudharys need to know,” he said.
Arjun, who had just witnessed Shanti’s confession knew that this was going to be an emotional and private moment for the family and stepped back after telling Surya to head back home as he will finish the formalities of Alka and Shanti’s arrests.
“Kya! Hey Radharani, ye kaisi kahani! Surya ji, ye Arjun ji kya bol rahe hain? Badi Kaki jail mein kaahe hain? Kya baat hui hai? Batao humein!”
“Imlie woh... woh... I’m... I’m Agastya’s twin!” Surya blurted out, the words tumbling from his lips before he had had time to process them himself. The statement sounding alien to his own ears.
Imlie’s eyes widened in shock. “Twin? What do you mean you’re his twin? How is that even possible? He never had a twin! I would have known...”
Surya held up his hands, trying to calm Imlie down. “It’s a long story, but I can assure you, I’m telling the truth”
Imlie stared at Surya with a mixture of confusion and suspicion, her gaze searching his face for any hint of deceit.
“We have to head back home. Now!” was all she could say.
Surya nodded, his heart pounding in his chest. This was not at all how he had expected his stay in Purvaiya to unfold. As he followed Imlie through the dusty and crowded marketplace, he couldn’t help but feel a growing sense of trepidation. What would the family think of him? And more importantly, what does this revelation mean for his life?
***
Surya sat nervously on the edge of the sofa, his hands fidgeting with the hem of his shirt as he waited for the family to come to terms with what he had just told them.
Dadi’s eyes narrowed, and for a moment, Surya felt as though she was peering straight into his soul. “Well, this is certainly an unexpected development. I can’t believe Alka did something so despicable and dared to keep something like this from us for all these years,” Dadi said.
She stepped closer, her eyes glistening with unshed tears as she kissed Surya’s forehead. “I can’t even imagine the hardships you must have gone through growing up. I wish we could have found you sooner.”
Surya struggled to maintain his composure, his emotions swirling inside him like a storm. Part of him yearned to retreat to the familiar confines of his Hyderabad apartment, to the life he had carefully constructed over the years – a life devoid of the complications and truths that now plagued him.
Yet, another part of him, a part he had buried long back, ached to understand the mysteries that shrouded his past.
“I... I want to believe all this...I really do... But it’s hard... After all this time... to let myself believe that I have a family,” he mumbled.
Sonali gave him a sympathetic smile. She of all people understood what it’s like to have walls built around your heart... protecting it from the harsh realities of the world.
She cautiously stepped forward and patted his back. “We understand, Surya. This must be overwhelming for you. Take your time to process this. I can’t believe my mother, who was herself a victim of my father’s deceits and selfish desires, could do something so horrible to an innocent child. Let me assure you, whatever punishment you deem fit for her, I’ll support you. Also know that whenever you’re ready to let us in, we’re all here for you.”
A tear escaped Surya’s eye as he looked up at her, feeling a glimmer of hope stirring within him.
As the day proceeded, Surya went back to being uneasy. The revelation of his twin brother and family’s existence had thrown his world into chaos. He couldn’t help but wonder what other secrets this family was hiding.
The sun began its slow descent beyond the horizon, casting a warm, golden glow over Purvaiya, and Surya found himself drawn to a tranquil spot under the huge banyan tree in the aangan. The soothing symphony of nature’s sounds calming his restless mind, providing respite from the whirlwind of emotions that had consumed him since his arrival in this village.
His gaze was fixed on the darkening sky. In the distance, he could hear the faint sounds of chatter drifting from the family home, a stark contrast to the solitude he had always known. The revelations Shanti had shared and the tragic tale of his twin’s untimely demise, had left Surya reeling.
His brow furrowed as he replayed the events of the day in his mind. Agastya, his twin, was the beloved Babu of Imlie, the captivating young woman whose initial hostility towards him had since the noon been replaced by a curious mixture of scepticism and tentative sympathy.
Lost in his thoughts, Surya failed to notice the soft footsteps approaching until a gentle voice reached his ears. “Surya?”
He turned to find Imlie standing before him, her expression a blend of uncertainty and determination. She hesitated for a moment, as if weighing her words, before taking a seat beside him. “I... I couldn’t help but notice you sitting out here, all alone,” she said, her voice barely above a whisper. “I thought you might want some company.”
Surya studied her for a moment, unsure of how to respond. The animosity he had sensed since his arrival in the village had been replaced by a surprising tenderness this evening, and he couldn’t help but feel intrigued by the sudden shift in her demeanour.
“I appreciate...” he replied, his tone cautious, “I just have a lot on my mind.”
Imlie nodded, her gaze drifting towards the Tulsi plant, hands fidgeting with the stark white pallu of her saree. “I can understand. This must all be overwhelming.”
Surya couldn’t help but let out a humourless chuckle. “That’s an understatement. One day, I’m an orphan and a cop in Hyderabad, and the next, I’m being told that I had a twin brother, and a family that I never knew of.”
Imlie’s expression softened and she gently patted on his hand. “Trust me, this family really didn’t know of your existence. Had they known, things would have been very different. Losing August Babu was the most devastating thing that’s ever happened to us... it had been days since I had seen anyone in this house smiled... but look at them now...”
Surya felt a pang of empathy as he watched the sadness flicker across Imlie’s features. “I’m sorry,” he murmured, the words escaping before he could stop them. “Look at me being all melodramatic about finding my family when you have lost so much.”
Imlie offered him a bittersweet smile, her eyes glistening with unshed tears. “It’s okay. I get it. You were robbed of a family... of a life you should have had. I know how that hurts.”
Surya felt a lump forming in his throat as Imlie’s words struck a chord within him. For so long, he had built up walls, convinced that he was better off alone, that the pain of abandonment was a cross he had to bear. But now, confronted with the reality of his past, he couldn’t help but feel a deep sense of loss and longing.
“I don’t know how to feel,” he admitted, his voice barely above a whisper. “All my life, I believed that I had no family, that I was an orphan. And now, to learn that I even had a twin brother... it’s too much to take in.”
Imlie nodded, her hand giving his arm a gentle squeeze. “I can imagine. But Surya, you need to know what happened to you, what Badi Kaki did... it’s not anyone else’s fault... The rest of the family doesn’t deserve to suffer anymore... Neither do you!”
Surya felt a wave of emotion wash over him, and he found himself unable to meet Imlie’s gaze. “I spent so long believing that I was better off alone, that I didn’t need anyone. I built up this tough, cynical persona to protect myself from the pain of disappointment and abandonment. But now...”
He trailed off, his hands clenching into fists as he struggled to keep his composure. Imlie remained silent, her eyes filled with empathy and understanding.
“Now, I don't know what to think,” Surya continued, his voice thick with emotion. “All these years, I ran from the ghosts of my past. And now, I’m being forced to confront them head-on.”
Unknowingly, Imlie shifted closer. “Surya, you don’t have to face this confusion alone. Your family is here for you.”
Surya felt a tremor run through him at her words, the raw vulnerability in her gaze stirring something deep within him. For so long, he had been the one protecting people, the one always in control. But now, in the face of Imlie’s compassion, he felt the carefully constructed barriers around his heart beginning to crack, allowing the love and acceptance of the family to seep in.
Dadi and Sonali, who had stepped out some time back to call these two, had fallen silent and observed them from a distance. They exchanged a knowing look. “These two have lost so much in life, but maybe, just maybe...” Dadi began to say. “They can find a way to heal together?” Sonali continued.
As they saw the two sitting together and shedding quiet tears over their losses... they knew that these two should no longer be alone. They sneaked back into the house, ready to hatch a plan with the rest of the family to bring these two together, knowing that it won’t be an easy task.
Surya couldn’t help but notice the way the setting sun cast a warm glow on Imlie’s soft features, and for a moment, he felt a strange connection, a strange pull...
“Imlie,” he called out, his voice soft and hesitant. “I don’t know if you trust me yet, but I want you to know that I’m doing everything in my power to find out what happened to Agastya.”
Imlie’s expression softened further as she could tell that he was being honest. “I appreciate it.”
***
The next day, Surya, Arjun and Tripathy left home early in the morning and began navigating through the dense foliage of the forest on the outskirts of Purvaiya where Agastya’saccident had taken place. Surya was leading the group, his authoritative demeanour evident as he scanned the surroundings for clues. Arjun was following closely behind, his eyes darting around, while Tripathy was in the rear, his hand resting on his holster.
Arjun gestured towards a clearing ahead, “This is where the accident took place, sir.” As he took a step ahead, he almost tripped over a fallen branch. “Whoa, that was close!”
Tripathy chuckled, knowing just how klutz Arjun can be. “Sir, you’re so graceful. The footwork is impeccable! Have you ever considered taking dance lessons?”
Arjun looked at him sheepishly. “Very funny, Tripathy. Focus, okay!”
The trio stepped into the clearing, their boots crunching on the dry leaves scattered on the forest floor. Arjun’s keen gaze fell on something tucked away in the midst of the trees.
“Sir, look!” He pointed towards a discreetly placed camera mounted on a tree. “I think it’s a wildlife monitoring cam.”
Surya: Goodobservation, Arjun! They must have been installed to keep track of the wildlife population and to deter poachers. Check if it is working and make sure the forest department staff cooperate and share all footage that is relevant to the case.
Arjun reached out to the forest department staff that came with the required equipment, skilfully accessed the camera’s memory card and started helping him in scanning through the footage while Surya and Tripathy went ahead in search of more clues.
Tripathy suddenly noticed someone lurking in the bushes nearby. He moved stealthily towards the intruder and grabbed him by the collar.
Tripathy: Looks like we have an uninvited guest, sir ji.
The man, Lakha, turned out to be a local criminal, involved in a dozen petty crimes in the past: Let me go, sir! I wasn’t doing anything wrong!
Tripathy tightened his grip. “Save your excuses for the court. You’re under arrest for interfering with police investigation.
Surya joined Tripathy, his expression stern as he confronted Lakha: “Bata kaun tereko bheja hai?Speak up before I lose my patience and...”
As soon as Surya raised his gun to scare Lakha, the latter began stammering: “Batata hoon, sir ji! Batata hoon! It was... it was Raghu Bhaiya. He wanted me to follow you guys and find out what you were up to.”
Surya’s eyes narrowed. ‘Officer Raghu, huh? Looks like our investigation just took an interesting turn.’
Surya asked Tripathy to take the man into custody and without raising any suspicion, call Raghu to the police chowki on the pretext of some paperwork.”
An hour later, Arjun came running into Surya’s chamber. He seemed excited. “Sir, I found something! Here’s the footage from the day of the accident.”
Surya leaned in to examine the screen. “And?”
Arjun pointed at the screen: Look here, Agastya ji’s car is coming from this side and see (pointing at another vehicle) someone in this other car is holding a gun and is trying to shoot at him.
Surya was surprised by the news. He nodded and patted Arjun’s back. “Well done, Arjun! This is a significant lead. Track down the owner’s details and update me at the earliest.”
‘Looks like Imlie was right,’ he thought.
Around three hours later, Surya’s head was spinning as he skimmed through the data in the file Arjun had just brought in. ‘How can this be? What sort of a messed up game is life playing with me?’ he thought.
The owner of the other car was none other than his arch nemesis, the notorious gangster, Guru Bhai. “Arjun, are you sure about this?”
Tripathy walked in right on cue. “Sir, after some third degree, Raghu finally opened his mouth. He was working as an insider informer for some Guru Bhai.”
Surya was confused.“I know this man. He runs a drug racket back in Hyderabad. I have been trying to nab him for a while now. But what’s his connection to Purvaiya? And why was he after Agastya? I don’t understand...”
Tripathy and Arjun exchanged worried glances. They hesitated, but Arjun decided to speak up.“Sir, what if Agastya ji wasn’t the target?”
“What do you mean?” Surya asked, still quite confused.
“Sir... woh...what if... what if you were the target and he confused Agastya ji for you..”Arjun explained hesitantly.
‘No! This cannot be!’ Surya thought horrified! ‘Was my brother really murdered mercilessly because of mistaken identity!?’
*Flashback ends*
“So you’re telling us that you’re the reason my husband is dead? Babu was my life, and you are saying, you, a mere doppelganger — who is not even an equivalent to his shadow — are why he was taken away from us? You are why we won’t be able to lead the life we dreamt of...” Imlie accused, her gaze once again filled with animosity. The friendly smile from the previous evening long gone.
Surya couldn’t help but feel a pang of guilt even as he himself grappled with yet another surreal revelation of his twin dying as an indirect result of his past actions... his failure to nab Guru Bhai in time!
------------------------------------
So that's it for part 5... I know it must look like one step ahead, five steps back, but more twists and turns await... See you soon with more detectivegiri and kuck kuch hota hai...
Ande-tamatar ki baarish shuru ki jaaye...
With love,
Shree
WOW - Once again I had the same DDP when we got that Agastya was killed due to mistaken identity. Sigh - your writing is so beautiful Shree. It makes me feel all the emotions again - the ones I already made peace with.
This show will forever be the one show which will always leave me unsatisfied as I did not get a decent closure either with Agastya - Imlie or with Surya - Imlie even though no actor quit the show in the middle.
Looking forward to how you weave the story of Surya - Imlie together. Beautiful writing.
https://tenor.com/view/kiss-mine-disney-princess-disney-kiss-flying-kiss-gif-12895648
Wonderful update.
So now Imlie knows that Surya was indirectly responsible for Agastya death. Ab aayega asli angst when Surya will slowly fall for her and she will deny her feelings. But dadi and Sonali may try to bring these two together as they rightly said only they can heal each other .
Looking forward to next updates
| topics | author | replies | views | reply |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| PSharada | 18 | 692 | ||
| Gags05 | 16 | 692 | ||
| Gags05 | 117 | 3376 | ||
| joliefemme | 1506 | 23862 | ||
| joliefemme | 1503 | 35298 |
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