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Sid has realized the pain that hides beneath the surface in Roshni. He is trying to help, but she just can't accept it from him just yet.
Sid has realized the pain that hides beneath the surface in Roshni. He is trying to help, but she just can't accept it from him just yet.
Originally posted by: coderlady
Sid has realized the pain that hides beneath the surface in Roshni. He is trying to help, but she just can't accept it from him just yet.
yess exactly, thank you for reading ❤️
An Early Update!!
Chapter 8 - Distance
It had already been night time by the time she finished her work. She decided to stay at home and work, since she was only going to create a ruckus by going.
Her mom came to check up on her multiple times, but Roshni didn't budge once. She was hurt, of course it's not that anger was her main emotion.
It was a secondary emotion, always caused by insecurities and emotional turmoil. DD knew this, perhaps lying to her and trying to trick her wasn't the best idea.
She never actually expected Roshni to turn so sour to Siddharth, it was assumed even by the first meeting, they would have been friends. But they didn't get along. She still remembers, bumping into Simran and discussing about their children's worrying future.
Siddharth never told his mom, what he actually planned to do in life. He had his own set of goals to be achieved, not just the jewellery company. That was simply for his mom. But somewhere along the way, as a parent she desired for him to settle down.
Roshni was calmer, since the fight in the afternoon. After losing herself into her thoughts and fears once again, she managed to get ahold of herself. She was just tired.
DD tip toed into the room, where Roshni pretended to sleep. She began to run her hands through her hair and massage it with oil.
"I never meant to hurt you Roshni"
Roshni listened intently to each and everyone of her words, of course she could forgive her. But how was she supposed to trust her again? Trust anyone?
"I know you're not sleeping. You can't ignore me forever"
She delicately opened her eyes and lifted herself up to face her mother.
"Why didn't you just tell me?", her tone was still stern but a tiny bit softer since the outburst earlier.
"I know you would've said no and that's not right."
"Why isn't it? Why is it such a big deal if I don't want to be with anyone? Or get married?"
"It wouldn't be. But look at you, you wake up everyday, go to work, come back, the same exact routine. How's that living Roshni? You're breathing yes, but your heart..your heart isn't really. Living requires so much more. Having fun, loving, getting hurt. It's all part of it", she cupped her face.
Roshni removed her hands from her face and intertwined it with hers. "I've always done everything you asked me. But this..I can't. I really can't".
"Regardless of what you think, I'm not asking this for me. I'm asking it for you. You owe it to yourself. You think I don't know how it feels to be broken? How it feels to wake up and feel like nothing in the world can fix that?"
"Dad", she whispered gently.
"Exactly. I was pregnant with you, when he left us. He didn't want a child, and so decided bailing was the only way. He's still in my heart, but despite that, I found a new way to love. And that was you"
A lone tear escaped Roshni's eyes while she bit her lip forcefully, trying to control her emotions.
"How am I supposed to give that to someone else again? I am not the same person I used to be", she pleaded.
"I know, you're stronger and you're more sensible now. But that doesn't necessarily mean you close yourself up. I'm not saying with Siddharth specifically, but at least try Roshni. What makes you think hurting someone else, or stopping someone from caring about you,will help?"
"I wasn't trying to hurt him or you. I am just tired mom. Tired of being lied to, and as far as Siddharth goes. I simply don't trust him"
"He's gone through pain too you know, Siddharth lost his father, and despite what you might see...his relationship with his mom isn't perfect either", she tried to convince her.
"What? They look like such a perfect mother and son"
"What you see on the outside isn't always the truth...His mom and his dad weren't together...after his dad passed away, he went to live with his mom. They're still distant with each other."
Roshni swallowed hard, "oh my god".
"It's true he didn't like you, Simran told me. After we signed the merge, he was frustrated with you but she made him promise her, that he would at least try to be decent with you. Of course he didn't know, what we were planning but he did it for her sake."
"That's why he started being nice to me"
"Well there's that, and there's also the fact that he's not scared to care about someone. I heard his conversation with you earlier...."
She sighed, "I know what you're going to say, I shouldn't have screamed at him. I know"
"Then why do you do it?! At least try to be friends Roshni...maybe this could be your way of really feeling alive again. I told you, feeling alive isn't just about breathing. It's also about relaxing, doing something you love, and I don't mean work. I mean something or someone, that you can talk to, and just feel like...you belong.", she attempted to create a beautiful image in her head.
"It doesn't matter. We're different. He's so calm and I'm so..."
"You're hurt... it's understandable. You have a soft side. The difference is that he wears it without fear, and you cover it with shame. I'm your mother, I notice these things. But you're hurting yourself by not trying"
"Every time I trust someone, they leave."
"I'm still here?"
"You still broke my trust mom"
"And I told you I am sorry. But it wouldn't have even come to this, if you knew how to take charge of your own happiness"
She wrapped her arms around Roshni tightly to which Roshni laid her head on her shoulder. "I know you think he's fake, but that's only because you can't believe that someone could actually care about you. I'm not telling you to fall in love, but even just being friends...Is it that hard?"
Roshni stopped her unnecessary thoughts and with a heavy start replied, "You have to stop expecting these things mom. I have you don't I? I don't need anyone else."
"You will always have me. But what about when I die, then?", she patted her head.
"MOM. Please don't start that again"
"It's the reality of life Sweetheart. It has to happen one day."
"I don't care. I don't want to hear it", she placed her head on her lap and drifted off to sleep.
*
Roshni pondered over the talk she had with her mom as she got ready wearing her white skirt with a creamy top.
Staring at her shadow, at her figure in the mirror gave her a strange feeling, one person who's always known her better than she knows herself is her mom.
And her words to her echoed in her head.
This pretentious behaviour, this protection barrier she cast upon herself had to stop. It was fine, while it was affecting just her, but now even the people around her. What was their mistake to have to bear her attitude?
Her defenses automatically jumped whenever she was around new people, and that's what had happened around Siddharth. Her insides were giving her a warning, but maybe it wasn't a warning.
Maybe it was a sign. A sign that she should push herself to confront those defenses.
He wasn't just a mere client, he was her business partner now. That's not something to be taken lightly.
One thing struck her hard, how he had the power to challenge her thoughts and emotions within days.
She knew it wasn't going to be easy, going back to the office. He was going to be there, and he didn't look so pleased when leaving yesterday. It was a whole other issue.
Her phone buzzed, and she picked it up while outlining her lips with her favourite dark red lipstick.
"Hello ma'am. Good Morning"
"Yes Vicky. Go on"
"I got an urgent request from the Smith's this morning. The fashion show you and Sir had planned has been postponed to 15th April"
"What! That's weeks away, we can't wait that long to launch our new jewellery line. What did Mr.Khurana say about this?"
"He said, that there's another option.."
"Which is...?
"The Smith's have irreplaceable positions between now and April except for 3 days from now."
She clutched the phone tighter, "That's impossible. How could he even think of that? How are we going to attend to all these arrangements in 2 days. Plus we have to travel there."
"He said he'd take care of the bookings, he just needs your approval asap to confirm."
"Hmmm...okay well tell him yes. I'll take care of the designs and models"
Siddharth could've called himself, but Roshni knew, he must've been upset after the way she spoke to him. His casual behaviour, shouldn't be taken for granted.
She thought back to their first meeting, when he didn't look like someone who would work hard or even commit for that matter. But seeing him in the office, the way he speaks to his workers, his elders, there was determination. He even came early to the office.
"Maybe he's not that bad", she thought. Especially after her mom's words last night about him, it hit her hard, that he was only trying to be nice. It was fine when she was just plain cold to everyone, but now taking out her anger on people, hurting them... It was a setback even for her.
"What have I become", she shook her head anxiously.
*
She emerged from her car and entered her office, giving each of her workers a familiar nod. Before going in her office she mumbled, "Remember you promised. Try not to lose your calm, even if he's annoying as hell"
However opening the door, she found he wasn't there. It didn't even seem like he had sat on the chair and gone through any files.
"Vicky!".
"Yes ma'am"
"Where's Mr.Khurana?"
"He called this morning and he said he prefers working in his office, and he said you would prefer that too"
"Hmm"
"He left you this note", she handed Roshni a small sticky memo.
Roshni opened it, and it read, "Don't worry, I won't invade your privacy again" with a smiley face. She shook her head, only he could add a smiley face on these type of notes. She knew his words the previous day were right and he didn't mean any harm, but it still didn't feel right to let him in.
She nodded dismissing her secretary. 'It is for the best', she thought. Now she wouldn't have to worry about distractions or useless arguments. He really did bring out another side to her.
Throughout the day, Vicky kept popping in to deliver messages from Siddharth, or he would send these formal emails to her of the preparations. She couldn't help but admit how irritating it was to keep sending emails back and forth.
They were partners and had to take every single decision together which meant even the smallest details had to be overviewed by the other.
They both interacted about the fashion show bookings, and how profitable it would be for the company. One thing she realised, was how ethical he was when it came to business. His language, his preparations.
Her landline rang loudly making a shrill sound, causing her to pick it up exasperatingly.
"Roshni Patel here, from Patel Jewellers"
"It's Siddharth. I booked our hotel and travel times. We're leaving tomorrow at 9. I figured it'd be easier if we just drove to the airport so, I'll see you there.", his voice sounded relaxed as always.
"Yeah okay. Send me the details"
"Alright..see y..".
"Wait!!"
"Yeah?"
"Umm..nothing. See you"
The call ended and Roshni slid further into her seat curving her back. She wanted to say, maybe he should come back to the office because it didn't make sense for them to be working separately. Plus god knows, what the media would make out of this.
But how would she even say that. Maybe he was right, they should've built up a decent comfortable environment with each other where they could talk freely.
"Ughhh thats why he wanted to get to know me. Now it makes sense.", she hit her head with her wrist.
She quickly called her mom, and requested her to pack a small suitcase for her.
"Yes we're leaving tomorrow morning. We need to overlook the necessities beforehand and make sure it's good enough."
"I'm hoping you don't end up killing each other on this trip"
She rolled her eyes. She wasn't fond of him, but it's not like she would risk her company.
♡
Soooo.... actually writing that heart to heart between Roshni and DD felt great. She's so soft to her mom, but she thinks it's a bad thing. Siddharth thinks Roshni made it clear that they can't even be nice to each other, so he decided to work separately. Now they're going on a trip... let's see what happens
And yes I don't consider this as one of my best chapters, I thought it was only okay, so bear with me if you didn't like it.
Also I can't tell you guys how much I appreciate seeing the comments and likes, even the silent readers!! I am very grateful, thank you so much! ❤️
Next Chapter - Page 23
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