YRKKH BTS, SM updates & Spoilers Thread #48 - Page 55

Originally posted by: Pinecone

Abhira loves Armaan and knows he is deeply disturbed so she's giving him a long rope and is understanding towards him. She is giving a hug to her husband to comfort him when he looks anxious. shes not throwing herself at a man who said he loves someone else. Nor is she imposing on a guy who said he did not want to marry her. She was coaxed to marry by Armaan but now he's upset and shes trying to be understanding. I dont think that amounts to lack of self worth. At some point if Armaan doesn't course correct she will also have an outburst. And i certainly dont think there can be any comparison between Abhira and Ruhi. Thats just crazy. Ruhi is a psycho. And comparing Abhira to Ruhi is absolutely not fair or logical.

It wasn't a comparison it was a retrospection. If we can criticize personality traits of the characters we dislike, we can also criticize/discuss similar personality traits of the characters we like. I can't be a blind fan not to point out the flaws of my favorite character or to justify her mistakes or to justify the way writers have written her character (my POV). I still feel connected to her character the most despite criticizing Abhira so the criticism is for betterment it is to see her growth as a character (writers do visit the forum/sm sites and take up few ideas so maybe they can give her a scene where she vents it all out or they can address the issue somehow).

Ruhi has psychological disorder to exhibit traits of lack of self-worth her actions obviously can't be excused as she is dangerous for the people around her, even the switch in character is a form of psychological disorder, but Abhira is mentally sound yet she is behaving as if her existence & happiness depends on approval from dadisa & now maa. She will keep trying for days infact months despite being rejected repeatedly? Why she is still hellbent on pleasing Vidya and not showing disappointment infront of Armaan as the matter is about "maa" (otherwise she always vented out her frustration when he prioritized dadisa/ruhi).

Vidya cursed Abhira and mentally tortured her, called her names. Abhira is least affected infact she is forcefully serving kheer to Vidya & now preparing for Vidya's birthday knowing it will affect Vidya and if anything went wrong it will affect Armaan too. Isn't Vidya the same woman who outcasted Abhira for being infertile? Shouldn't she fight back for her self-worth that it's not "her fault" that she can't conceive. If she can't fight back as it's maa and "maa lovvves Armaan & Abhira" alteast maintain some distance from the woman who considers her a curse for her family. It's called sef-preservance. Vidya isn't just angry she wished bad for her and Armaan.

Then comes her dependence on Armaan, not even once she could leave Armaan for months let alone for days. When Armaan was getting married to Ruhi not caring about her feelings she cried for him for days (almost every single day she had a breakdown scene) & now when Armaan is being distant and apparently doesn't care about her anymore as maa is the priority, why isn't she having a serious conversation with him? How long is she going to let it go? Armaan is Abhira's husband and she is trying to set things right. Ok. She can't give up on him as she believes their relationship won't be same again if she gave up. Understandable. But if he is constantly shutting her out whenever she is trying to get closer to him physically or emotionally there is no way to make him understand other than making him realize that u are also a human with feelings. She must give him the space, to miss her presence by his side, she need to be out of his sight/ignore him for days only then he will realize. She is letting herself be treated that way by the man she loved and married against her instinct (he won't be happy in this marriage). That's clearly her lack of self-worth.

Abhira who blamed him and his family and called them out every single time (initially she called out Vidya too) isn't expressing any emotion? Abhira who loved herself first & spoke for herself whenever anybody tried to humiliate her is now a person who doesn't feel anything after humiliation, insults & curses? Abhira the character who was an inspiration is reduced to? Nobody should be this prone to rejection, humiliation, rudeness, curses & namecalling. Abhira can hug Armaan and do anything she want to do with Armaan (Armaan Abhira ka hai ) but Armaan should also be in mood or responding to it otherwise it will keep hurting her pride.

I disagree with your assessment of Abhira.

Its unnecessarily harsh in my opinion.

By mentioning Ruhi and Abhira in one para, you are comparing them and thats absolutely illogical in my opinion.

Yes I also want her to call out V and not care so much. But I can understand why she does care and why she still wants to mend things, hope for reconciliation etc.

The circumstances of Abhira are way different than when she first came to PH. Her equation with family is very different now. Armaan is now her love, her husband .Therefore I understand why she's giving so much leeway, tolerating all this stuff.

She's trying her best to talk. She's been very direct even in last 2 episodes asking him to share, being very straightforward about her concerns but he is walking away so she's giving him space.

She will eventually definitely reach her tolerance threshold if Armaan keeps up his behavior forever. But I understand why she's still trying. I also expect her to give up and go silent and distance herself if he keeps up his indifference. But she's got more patience now because her equation with Armaan is different now. He fought everyone to marry her and she trusts him. So she's giving him a really long rope. But she will also have an outburst . No one is invincible. She can only keep up her cheery facade and optimism for sometime.

Originally posted by: Pinecone

I disagree with your assessment of Abhira.

Its unnecessarily harsh in my opinion.

By mentioning Ruhi and Abhira in one para, you are comparing them and thats absolutely illogical in my opinion.

Yes I also want her to call out V and not care so much. But I can understand why she does care and why she still wants to mend things, hope for reconciliation etc.

The circumstances of Abhira are way different than when she first came to PH. Her equation with family is very different now. Armaan is now her love, her husband .Therefore I understand why she's giving so much leeway, tolerating all this stuff.

She's trying her best to talk. She's been very direct even in last 2 episodes asking him to share, being very straightforward about her concerns but he is walking away so she's giving him space.

She will eventually definitely reach her tolerance threshold if Armaan keeps up his behavior forever. But I understand why she's still trying.

@bold maybe because I expect a lot from her (though we shouldn't expect from ITV characters) if not fighting spirit she need to have self-perseverance. Maybe it's only me who feels Abhira doesn't react where she should. Let's agree to disagree.

Ma’am jaise log are beyond my comprehension level I swear.

Originally posted by: ShadowImbue

@bold maybe because I expect a lot from her if not fighting spirit she need to have self-perseverance. Maybe it's only me who feels Abhira doesn't react where she should. Let's agree to disagree.

Same. I will always be Abhira fan but I miss the old Abhira. wish she can go back to being that Abhira who would always stand up for herself & give back to others who disrespect her, but I also completely understand what @pinecone is saying, the situation of Abhira then, and now is completely different .

She is newly married, He is her husband now, and Abhira is just being understanding and trying to mend things.

Originally posted by: Sneha.Narayanan

Same. I will always be Abhira fan but I miss the old Abhira. wish she can go back to being that Abhira who would always stand up for herself & give back to others who disrespect her, but I also completely understand what @pinecone is saying, the situation of Abhira then, and now is completely different .

She is newly married, He is her husband now, and Abhira is just being understanding and trying to mend things.

her tolerance threshold is very different now than before. She chooses her battles. She is willing to bend and even take a few blows if it helps maintain peace and thats what living in a joint family has taught her.

Earlier she was very voicoferous because she had no connection with anyone in PH. She was a free bird, lone ranger.

But now theres a lot of history, she knows these people and their flaws, their impulsiveness, their personality, their baggage and also their conservative and even sometimes regressive ideas. She has seen the same V who is cursing now also be a staunch supporter and caring for her. So she isnt willing to fully give up on a woman who she saw as a mother figure and means the world to her husband. She hopes that she can win her over with genuine love.

We the audience see Kaveri and V as evil women. But to Armaan and now to Abhira, they are family.

Abhira is tolerating things she would not have put up with before because now she dil seh is biwi and bahu. Its not deal shaadi anymore. And she knew that when she married Armaan, she signed up for everything that it comes with. And she cant give up without doing everything she can to make things work, to make things better.

It doesn't mean Abhira has no self respect or feelings. She will tolerate until she is unable to handle it anymore. She is able to blow off steam by venting to MG, or a Manisha. She has a chorus gang to distract her from the negative things. So she has some support and coping mechanisms too in the midst of all the hurt from Vs behavior and Armaans indifference. But ultimately if Armaan continues his indifference, she will have an outburst because he is the only one who is truly hers.

Whether they show her have an outburst or salvage Armaan before that happens remains to be seen.

also tolerating these people day in and day out takes a toll on her. Somewhere she is bound to get affected by all the things sunaoed to her over time. So its hard for her to be gung ho and as idealistic and fearless as she used to be. She is bound to feel emotional and blame herself if the woman who loved her like a daughter flips and starts hating her guts. She is bound to feel guilt and obligated to both tolerate things and strive to mend things if the V-Armaan relationship which was supposedly very genuine has fragmented to this extent where V is not even talking to him for 3 months straight, whereas Abhira expected her to melt much sooner. She is not looking at this objectively like we the audience are. She is in the midst of it all. And she is very emotional about everything too.

All of us would love her to say enough is enough and call out V, ruhi, Kaveri and now even Armaan for his indifference. Or to retaliate with her own indifference to those who are being unreasonable. And I believe it will happen - she will react, but in due course when she is unable to take it anymore.

As per BTS she does breakdown in front of MG but he asks her to not give up, consoles her and tells her to be patient.

So its not like she is unaffected. today she may get placated by MGs assurance but if Armaan doesnt fix things, she will not be consolable in future and she will take more concrete steps.

What if I say that after screaming, ranting and cribbing here the whole day I actually liked today's episode cause look at the material

So who are we bashing how much today? I have a lot of time to come prepared for later in the day!

Originally posted by: ShadowImbue

@bold maybe because I expect a lot from her (though we shouldn't expect from ITV characters) if not fighting spirit she need to have self-perseverance. Maybe it's only me who feels Abhira doesn't react where she should. Let's agree to disagree.

@bold : +1

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