Smriti Khanna Talks About Postpartum Issues And Trolls

Meri Aashiqui fame Smriti Khanna, who embraced motherhood last month on April 15th, is cherishing each and every moment of her new journey. The actress recently opened up on how being a mother is not at all easy. She talks about the challenges she faced during her journey of motherhood and how her husband, Gautam Gupta has been super understanding and caring. Smriti spoke about breastfeeding, husband Gautam and her daughter's bond and how she deals with the trolls.

She said "The feeling of motherhood is something which can't be described in words, but it's amazing. It is a very different feeling and can't be compared to any other happiness. No matter how tired you are, how sleep deprived you, how much pain you have gone through when you hold that little baby in your hand. It's all worth it."

She spoke about trolls revealing that "I think any mother whether she has put on weight or not, haters will put negative comments on her post. I have friends in the industry like Mahhi Vij and all who put on weight during pregnancy so they got trolled and I did not put on weight that much even then I was trolled. The trolls started getting personal and they told me that I don't care about my baby. I had to put an entire video clearing that I have not done anything for my transformation. Maybe my body is such that I did not take time to get back to being closer to my previous weight. I haven't started with my workouts, of course, I go for walk and eat healthy. I am doing a little bit of yoga which is allowed. It's not like I started working out from the next day of my delivery. Anyways nobody is allowed to go to the gym right now due to the lockdown. I also know for six weeks after delivery you can't work out. Everybody's body type, metabolism is different. My body is such that I lose weight very easily. I gain limited weight during my pregnancy. I was not dieting either. I consulted my doctors, read books and did online research. I was doing everything in a healthy way. I was not doing anything to make myself or my baby suffer. When she was born she was born healthy. Her weight was also perfect and everything was under control. She is in fact putting on a little bit of more weight than what she was actually supposed to. She is healthy and that's what matter's to us. I have realised after a point that you can't do much because haters will hate you."

The actress went on to address post-pregnancy issues " I have realised that even if you speak good on social media and educate people about pregnancy and motherhood, haters will still troll you. I felt that people don't discuss much about pregnancy, weight issues, breastfeeding and I feel these topics should come out openly in our society because there are so many myths and women struggle all their life to lose weight. There are so many times that this becomes a matter of depression for them. They stop going out because they are not looking a certain way or not fitting into their dress. Some women are scared to get pregnant. There is postpartum depression and it is a big thing and it is not spoken in India. There are so many girls and mother's who have messaged me saying thank you for making pregnancy look so smooth and nice. They tell me they were scared to get pregnant thinking that their body would look a certain way or they will completely go on bed rest. Now they feel that pregnancy can be a fun ride too. There were 10 per cent people who had problems with everything but there will be 90 per cent people who were giving blessings to me and my kid which made me feel great. I am just trying to say to my fans that you can do everything in a fit way. People start assuming that agar koi patla hai... toh usne diet shuru kar diya and usko khayal nahi hai bacche ka. If someone gets pregnant, they ask the woman to just be on bed and eat double no all these are myths. These are wrong things to do, I am just saying be active during and after your pregnancy. So I just realised I should not bother about getting trolled, I will continue to spread positivity."

"My doctor had advised me sabki suno but karo khud ki because the mother knows best. Do what you feel is best, do your research and ask us if you have any doubts. I am anyways this person who will surf the internet and read books for everything. I started reading books and reviews from all the moms who faced problems and challenges. What women go through in other countries also. If I had pain, I would call up my doctor and ask but because I had read so much about everything I always knew my answer. However, I always consulted with the doctors to be sure. We are born in a day and age where we have all answers on the internet and through books. Don't follow everything on the internet blindly and consult your doctor also. There are so many unwanted pieces of advice that come your way." she added.

The actress spoke about breastfeeding "I was facing issues with breastfeeding and nobody had ever discussed it. Everyone was like ghar par baitho hojaata hai... I mean for few people it might be easy but for me it wasn't. I faced a lot of issues and I have cried also that I am not able to do it. The guilt started coming in that why I am giving formula milk to my baby, is it good? I have always heard that breast milk is the best for the baby. Why I am doing this to my baby. Right now also if she is taking 8 times milk, two times I have to give her formula. I would feel terrible at the beginning. So, mental peace is also something that nobody discusses. If I am a new mother and I am feeling sleepy I should sleep, I need that peace of mind, I should not feel guilty. If my baby is not getting enough milk from me, I can't make her cry, I will have to take help of formula and there is nothing wrong in it. When I started breastfeeding her, I had to give her more formula milk because I was not able to produce milk, I have really worked so that I don't have to give her formula for every meal. I have reached that level where 6 times I give her my milk and 2 times I give her formula and I should do it guilt free. There's nothing wrong. I am trying my best that in the coming weeks I don't need to give her formula, but even if I have to I should not feel guilty." 

She revealed she took classes for breastfeeding and lactation "I did classes for breastfeeding and lactating. My husband was also there with me and he was even there with me for labour class because we did not have that much information. But it's very important to educate moms especially about childcare, breastfeeding, and lactating. I think moms should be educated. It happens in other countries but nobody bothers here. We did the classes and in fact, Gautam insisted that he should come. In fact, for the child care classes my in-laws also joined in. My brother-in-law, mother-in-law and father-in-law. They were very clear that if they need to take care of the baby they better know everything. It was a good class. The child specialist that came for the childcare class, she was very surprised and impressed that my in-laws were also there for the classes. She said that it was very sweet of them. So, touch wood I have a great family. "

Smriti continued "It was very tough for me, I cried on many occasions. At the hospital I had to just press one button and the nurse would come and they would know why the baby is crying if she has got enough feed or not. First two, three days mothers don't even get milk; it is the colostrum that you get. But the nurse would manage everything. When I brought my baby home and I was told to give her breast milk only she would just not stop crying. Once, Gautam and I were struggling till 3 am as we had no help who would guide us. We were clueless if she was ok, or her stomach was aching. I was trying to feed her for two hours and it was 3 am in the night. Then, finally we thought let's just give her formula milk and luckily we had it from the hospital. Gautam opened the sterilizer and even burnt his hand. It was such a chaotic situation because when the baby cries you panic. First Gautam was against formula milk as he had taken the breastfeeding classes, but then he understood. We gave her a little milk and she stopped crying and slept peacefully. Then we researched and understood that for the initial few weeks mother's don't get that much milk. It's fine if you have to top it up. I started taking ghar ke nuskhe to increase lactating like methi seeds, shatavari powder, fennel seeds all those things. It kept getting better. I feel mother's should not feel guilty as they have already done a better job."

She then spoke about her babygirl "Her name is Anaika. It means powerful and complete, I feel it resonates with the current situation. Complete because our family is complete now with her arrival. The baby has come after a long time in the house. Gautam is the elder brother and everyone was waiting for her. Powerful because she came during this time which makes her super strong. It is a blessing in disguise for us, no matter what the situation is outside. In a way the good thing is that everyone is getting so much time to be with her. Otherwise, everyone would give her love but I don't think anyone from the family would have been able to give her that much time. My brother-in-law, father-in-law and Gautam go to the office everyday. Gautam is super happy that he is getting to spend so much time with her and is able to see her grow every single day. He has learnt everything be it changing diapers, how to put her to sleep. We couldn't get help this time because of the lockdown So, everyone in the family is spending time with her and it is a great bonding time for all of us also."

"We had a very long list and this name was not even part of that list. We had made a list with all the boys and girl's names because we did not know the gender. We had a long list and as soon as she came, we are five members in the family. I stay with my in-laws. We would sit on the dinner table every day and discuss names. Everybody had to say yes to the name. We all together came up with this name and this was the only name that we all liked."

"When a girl is born we perform a puja on the 6th day (chatthi puja) we did that thing at home only. We are doing all the ceremonies at home only. My parents could not meet her because of the situation. They had a plan that the day she is born they will meet her in the hospital but that couldn't happen so every day I have to do a video call with her and show her. If there are other functions or rituals we do it on zoom call together. " she added

The actress also talked about her husband as a father "I always wanted to see him with his kid and such a nice thing to see him do all the things. I didn't know how much he would bond with the baby. Boys you know how they are chilled out and relaxed. But with the daughter I wanted to see how he will bond. So beautiful to see them together and it is blissful. She loves sleeping on him and he also loves being with her. They sleep together for hours. I think she is totally going to be a daddy's girl when she grows up."

The actress finally spoke about their recent music video "The music video was lot of fun. I was five months pregnant when we shot the video. We were supposed to shoot before that but monsoons came and somehow we couldn't travel. Then they us that they are going to shoot next month and I was conscious that I will grow big and my baby bump will be seen. During pregnancy we feel that suddenly we will have a big bump but that doesn't happen. It happens only towards the end. My pregnancy was quite smooth and I was very healthy. I had a great time and I told my doctor that I have to travel and he was fine. I think I have travelled throughout my second trimester , I went to Mauritius for a work, then we went to shoot this song to Armenia, then Switzerland for a family holiday. I did a girls trip and if you are healthy you can. Of course you need to follow precautions while travelling, there was a long list of medications that the doctor had prescribed. I had a letter from my doctor that I can fly. Last trimester of course you can't fly."

"We were working together after 4/5 years. It was after Meri Aashiqui that we were working together. We keep doing videos on our own, but this was very special because the third member was going to join us soon. The locations were very beautiful and I did not know about the location and it is very unexplored place right now. The makers had liked out videos that we make. They contacted us saying they want a real couple and the candid content that we make. We were very happy when we heard the song and we thought now we will have a song of our own and a memory of our baby." she added talking about being pregnant during the shooting.

She talked about her issues during the pregnancy "Initially, I had no craving till my first trimester and I would think mujhe kyu nahi horaha pregnant women talk so much about it. In my third trimester I got some weird cravings. In winters I wanted a mango shake and original not the pulp one I told clearly to Gautam. Somewhere he managed to get it and it was good. Once I wanted to have Eilaichi cream biscuits, Gautam tried his best but he was getting strawberry, mango, orange cream biscuits but not the elaichi one. I had eaten it during my childhood and years later I wanted to eat it."

"Initially, I had no craving till my first trimester and I would think mujhe kyu nahi horaha pregnant women talk so much about it. In my third trimester I got some weird cravings. In winters I wanted a mango shake and original not the pulp one I told clearly to Gautam. Somewhere he managed to get it and it was good. Once I wanted to have Eilaichi cream biscuits, Gautam tried his best but he was getting strawberry, mango, orange cream biscuits but not the elaichi one. I had eaten it during my childhood and years later I wanted to eat it." she concluded.