its slyly told by abhira not openly like ruhi.Originally posted by: Firefly_shines
exactly! I have said this earlier also, even Abhira never misses a chance to becharify herself or play the victim card… but nobody has any problem with it… in fact people sympathise with her…but when Ruhi says even a line about her trauma it automatically means she is an attention seeker and guilt trips people….
having loving parents or parent is a boon in life as they struggle to give utmost happiness to their kids. They grow the seeds of nourishment throughout their guidance. My friends hubby was brain dead on the spot while going out of his home suddenly. He was very young and they had a son 6 yr old. That sudden death made my friend in shock that she can't come of it for 2 yrs. Imagine she had that growing kid with her and in right time everything is lost.her parents came helped her but they too passed away one after another one in heart attack another after failed heart surgery. For her there was no time to come out of trauma as she lost 3 people in 5 yrs. Her son is in class 10 now. Dragging the life for the sake of kid nothing much left for her except memories and pain.Trauma is not easy in life. Sorry to get personal matter but seeing ruhis story i get that boy on head always.Originally posted by: shalu1786
When a person does not have a relation, they never feel anything about not having them. I don't have a elder brother, I am OK with it because that is how human emotion works. Abhira does not have any relation except mom, she is Ok. She knows her father is dead and feels bad about it.
But ruhi is altogether different case. She knows her father is no more and feels sad, but she had all the other relations, mother, a father figure, a cousin who filled the place of a brother and another cousin as well, along with grand parents uncle and aunt. But she lost all relations one by one. This is painful that even an adult can have trauma let alone a 6 year old child.
Childhood trauma is something that follows a person through out his/her entire life. It can be doormat but can be triggered at some point of life. Dkp is using that issue when they made ruhi accept Rohit's marriage proposal or feel lost when Manish decided to have pooja for Ak.
We know abhira can't see her mother's picture torn and start to fight with dadisa. She is 22 when she lost her mother but torn her picture still acts as a trigger. So how can we expect a person does not have trauma when she lost her relation in her childhood itself. Gvs never addressed ruhi's trauma, just let it be, so it is doormat in her and bound to active at some point.
Originally posted by: Firefly_shines
So Abhira ka rehna, kana, peena, education, uske kapde all expenses are borne by Armaan sa as she said today… interesting.. I thought Abhira apne expenses khud utati hai
Does anyone else feel Abhira uses reverse psychology while dealing with Armaan to get things done… I previously hadn’t thought from this perspective but now it’s very much clear she always uses this method…
She clearly knows Ar is doing all this only because of his guilt and akshara’s sacrifice and he also thankfully mentions this at every point of time… so instead of showing gratitude and being indebted for him, she shows attitude and screams to payback the amount but the next second plays the victim card that I have no money, no one, no where to go, you are doing so much ehsans… she also subtly included the line ki agar meri mumma ki khushi ke liye meri zimmedari utana chahte ho toh uta sakte ho coz that’s what she wants.
In reverse psychology you play with words in such a way that you make the other person say things that you want to hear and the situation works in your favour… ab purposefully said why to keep guilt in your heart which triggered Ar and when he said her mom took a bullet for him and he can never repay that, she gave a disgusted look as she expected him to say that he is doing all this by his choice…Now anyone with a little self respect and humanity will obviously say he isn’t doing any ehsan and it’s his duty…
What I fail to understand is what’s the need? Ar will as such do more than asked in his guilt so why play such tricks, just be grateful… currently she doesn’t have any money so why to make a big deal about repaying it… If Abhira has any intention to repay then when she has enough money repay it, if he doesn’t accept and considers it as his duty then be extra gracious and grateful that even today the world has so much goodness and has angels in human form and use the money for some positive purpose like charity… there is absolutely no reason to make so much fuss around signing paper and indirectly guilt tripping the person….
Reverse psychology is the easiest way to manipulate a person especially someone like Armaan as he is already guilt ridden and as I saw the episode felt Abhira doing the same…. Share your thoughts….
Look I have a straight forward opinion I this matter. A marriage should be based on love, trust and mutual respect not gratitude. Here armaan is making it clear that he is doing everything for abhira because Ak saved his life period.
He is not even considering that 1 year marriage deal. Only in front fufa he open his mouth and say my wife so and so. In front of Dadi he can't open his mouth. When there is something goes wrong he won't mind checking the facts, but blast on abhira. That is his style.
As you said even if abhira managed to guilt trip him it can only effective for a small time. Once armaan felt that he had payed off ak's gratitude or he felt that something really bad happened to his family because of abhira it will backfire on abhira. Armaan won't even consider checking the facts. We have seen it during Dadi's case when armaan felt abhira has given dev land papers.
to be practical whats the need to take money from hubby for a house which is in renovation. These are practical things in life and what she had in her mind and heart are menories of her mother for 22 yrs of her raising, morals and values. This is more than enough to be in life as its keeping her mom always with her follow what she told her to. Taking money from hubby and paying as loan later. Its like indebted to him or poddars for his gratitude on her and bear the wrath more if any next. Any way ar cant give back ak so he wants to retain this house to abhira and make her happy. Like you said he will be on upper hand when needed dadi will use it as weapon to taunt her.Originally posted by: shalu1786
Look I have a straight forward opinion I this matter. A marriage should be based on love, trust and mutual respect not gratitude. Here armaan is making it clear that he is doing everything for abhira because Ak saved his life period.
He is not even considering that 1 year marriage deal. Only in front fufa he open his mouth and say my wife so and so. In front of Dadi he can't open his mouth. When there is something goes wrong he won't mind checking the facts, but blast on abhira. That is his style.
As you said even if abhira managed to guilt trip him it can only effective for a small time. Once armaan felt that he had payed off ak's gratitude or he felt that something really bad happened to his family because of abhira it will backfire on abhira. Armaan won't even consider checking the facts. We have seen it during Dadi's case when armaan felt abhira has given dev land papers.
very well put! Deal or no deal, Armaan’s each action is driven by guilt and gratitude for Akshara and hence there is so much of power imbalance between them… love toh dur ki baat hai even the care and respect comes off as his way of repaying the gratitude….Originally posted by: shalu1786
Look I have a straight forward opinion I this matter. A marriage should be based on love, trust and mutual respect not gratitude. Here armaan is making it clear that he is doing everything for abhira because Ak saved his life period.
He is not even considering that 1 year marriage deal. Only in front fufa he open his mouth and say my wife so and so. In front of Dadi he can't open his mouth. When there is something goes wrong he won't mind checking the facts, but blast on abhira. That is his style.
As you said even if abhira managed to guilt trip him it can only effective for a small time. Once armaan felt that he had payed off ak's gratitude or he felt that something really bad happened to his family because of abhira it will backfire on abhira. Armaan won't even consider checking the facts. We have seen it during Dadi's case when armaan felt abhira has given dev land papers.
Even if tomorrow abhimaan love story begins talwar humesha latkega hi… one mistake from Abhira and she will be thrown out of the house… that’s because the foundation of their relationship is weak and hollow… it was a forceful marriage with zero love, trust and respect… aur yahi sach rahega… that they can forcefully bring two people together but doesn’t mean they are compatible…
arranged marriage is done seeing each others family and boy girl meet each other to proceed further if they are interested. S1 was that types where arranged marriage worked. Next seasons love marriages we saw the affects of family on them and the control of family over couple. Here its gratitude and love is thrown as sacrifice to brother for family. How will a family adjust easily when a girl is suddenly got and married to their son. Slowly they are adapting to her and the way she initiated them for change is coming. Dadi types or fufa types won't bend easily. Any sort of discontent is shown first on her as she is not selected by them as bahu.As they selected ruhi as bahu they trust her blindly without mocking her. This difference will always be there.Originally posted by: Firefly_shines
very well put! Deal or no deal, Armaan’s each action is driven by guilt and gratitude for Akshara and hence there is so much of power imbalance between them… love toh dur ki baat hai even the care and respect comes off as his way of repaying the gratitude….
Even if tomorrow abhimaan love story begins talwar humesha latkega hi… one mistake from Abhira and she will be thrown out of the house… that’s because the foundation of their relationship is weak and hollow… it was a forceful marriage with zero love, trust and respect… aur yahi sach rahega… that they can forcefully bring two people together but doesn’t mean they are compatible…
From the start what Abhira was doing to Armaan is emotional manipulation.. on one side she writes all her expenses and tells him that she will return everything, reminds him frequently about their deal but on the other side she claims him as husband for one year or as long as they are married.. if Armaan becomes furious for messing up the things she starts guilt tripping him by saying that she don’t have anyone left and she is there only for one year.. today also she did that when he was pissed at her for standing before bulldozer. Before others she shouts and argues or remain silent , but before Armaan she always use a victim card. If Ruhi’s trauma is leading her to pursue Armaan, then Abhira is also doing the same by playing victim card she is manipulating Armaan to confide in her so that she can get along with the poddars as long she wants to be in that house.Originally posted by: Firefly_shines
So Abhira ka rehna, kana, peena, education, uske kapde all expenses are borne by Armaan sa as she said today… interesting.. I thought Abhira apne expenses khud utati hai
Does anyone else feel Abhira uses reverse psychology while dealing with Armaan to get things done… I previously hadn’t thought from this perspective but now it’s very much clear she always uses this method…
She clearly knows Ar is doing all this only because of his guilt and akshara’s sacrifice and he also thankfully mentions this at every point of time… so instead of showing gratitude and being indebted for him, she shows attitude and screams to payback the amount but the next second plays the victim card that I have no money, no one, no where to go, you are doing so much ehsans… she also subtly included the line ki agar meri mumma ki khushi ke liye meri zimmedari utana chahte ho toh uta sakte ho coz that’s what she wants.
In reverse psychology you play with words in such a way that you make the other person say things that you want to hear and the situation works in your favour… ab purposefully said why to keep guilt in your heart which triggered Ar and when he said her mom took a bullet for him and he can never repay that, she gave a disgusted look as she expected him to say that he is doing all this by his choice…Now anyone with a little self respect and humanity will obviously say he isn’t doing any ehsan and it’s his duty…
What I fail to understand is what’s the need? Ar will as such do more than asked in his guilt so why play such tricks, just be grateful… currently she doesn’t have any money so why to make a big deal about repaying it… If Abhira has any intention to repay then when she has enough money repay it, if he doesn’t accept and considers it as his duty then be extra gracious and grateful that even today the world has so much goodness and has angels in human form and use the money for some positive purpose like charity… there is absolutely no reason to make so much fuss around signing paper and indirectly guilt tripping the person….
Reverse psychology is the easiest way to manipulate a person especially someone like Armaan as he is already guilt ridden and as I saw the episode felt Abhira doing the same…. Share your thoughts….
They hid the deal marriage before family fearing Yuvraj, but now Yuvraj was caught and in jail.. if Abhira wants they can reveal it to family, but no, she didn’t even open her mouth when Dadi want Armaan to leave the house knowing that all is happening because of her. Armaan is clear that he is supporting and taking care of her because he feels indebted for Ak sacrificing her life for him, but why Abhira is staying with Armaan? Ok she wants to complete her studies and become lawyer, it means she is using him and poddars to fulfill her dreams.. if that’s the case, what should be her role in the family? Chup chap studies complete karke sab ko thank you bolke poddar house se nikalna chahiye. But what she is doing instead is pinpoint the mistakes and blame others. And now madam is falling in love. Another ddp for the viewers to watch.
Ruhi is stupid to go behind a this person who doesn’t even understand his place in his own family. He left her for family and married Abhira without even thinking once about his family. He claims to love his family but keeps his wife ahead of them whom he doesn’t even love. He is the most confused person I’ve ever seen.Originally posted by: Mehersudha
Arman poddar is living in a joint family so the sources of income are not independent.As per joint family system accounts are there for all but control is from one head.He is an elderly man no doubt earning money through poddars law firm we saw him win only one case initially and next was madhav case he won for which no money comes. Rest two shown are one dropped case of yuvi another is dadis.He being in that big family didn't take permission to inform his shadi to elders whom he says he respects nor permission to build a renovated house for abhira. Today i was like what dhong he says my family, i dont go against them .He fooled ruhi that way threw on rohit easily and doing everything from then what he wants. In all this he folds hands says sorry or cries goes away. I dont know any son does this way going against his claimed family love.
Originally posted by: Firefly_shines
So Abhira ka rehna, kana, peena, education, uske kapde all expenses are borne by Armaan sa as she said today… interesting.. I thought Abhira apne expenses khud utati hai
Does anyone else feel Abhira uses reverse psychology while dealing with Armaan to get things done… I previously hadn’t thought from this perspective but now it’s very much clear she always uses this method…
She clearly knows Ar is doing all this only because of his guilt and akshara’s sacrifice and he also thankfully mentions this at every point of time… so instead of showing gratitude and being indebted for him, she shows attitude and screams to payback the amount but the next second plays the victim card that I have no money, no one, no where to go, you are doing so much ehsans… she also subtly included the line ki agar meri mumma ki khushi ke liye meri zimmedari utana chahte ho toh uta sakte ho coz that’s what she wants.
In reverse psychology you play with words in such a way that you make the other person say things that you want to hear and the situation works in your favour… ab purposefully said why to keep guilt in your heart which triggered Ar and when he said her mom took a bullet for him and he can never repay that, she gave a disgusted look as she expected him to say that he is doing all this by his choice…Now anyone with a little self respect and humanity will obviously say he isn’t doing any ehsan and it’s his duty…
What I fail to understand is what’s the need? Ar will as such do more than asked in his guilt so why play such tricks, just be grateful… currently she doesn’t have any money so why to make a big deal about repaying it… If Abhira has any intention to repay then when she has enough money repay it, if he doesn’t accept and considers it as his duty then be extra gracious and grateful that even today the world has so much goodness and has angels in human form and use the money for some positive purpose like charity… there is absolutely no reason to make so much fuss around signing paper and indirectly guilt tripping the person….
Reverse psychology is the easiest way to manipulate a person especially someone like Armaan as he is already guilt ridden and as I saw the episode felt Abhira doing the same…. Share your thoughts….
Yesterday Armaan gave a big slap to the viewers who believed Abheera was paying her tution fee with internship money. At least makers were sensinble enough to show that. Internship does get an allowance which is not even enough to get by. She was not shown as doing any part-time also. So it didn't make any sense. This also show's writer's inconsistency in their narration.
Imo Abhira is in no position to be self-sufficient when she hasn't finished her studies let alone establishing her career. Deep inside she knows that she does not have any financial stability to fend for herself; she herself has said this many times which have made Armaan feel more guilty with the way of how she words it. Ultimately her ego makes her not want to accept the fact that she needs his help as it is suffocating to her be in debt to him. So she acts like she does not need Armaan's help which puts him in a difficult position.
She does not know how to appreciate the benefactor's aid in her journey to become the lawyer. Just simply say thanks and be grateful instead of showing attitude and being blunt about how she would paying back which stem from her ego issue. She could have conveyed this in a different manner but no she found the need to let Armaan know she would payback and would not live freely. Armaan knows that much about Abheera. Bar bar yaad dila ne ki zarurath nahi hai whenever he does something for her. So there was no need of a piece of paper. He is not a stranger or debtor who will come after her for collecting money. Asking him to sign that piece of document will only devalue and disrespect Armaan's actions which is done out of goodwill. Self-respect is important but Abhira needs to be humble also. Being humble will make person to be more attiuned with feelings of others.
Wrong! So much of your post has so many incorrect notions but you asked to share thoughts. So here's what I have to say:
What Ab is using it's called ding ding ding BEING THE LEGAL WIFE OF ARMAAN. Her husband can spend on her as much as she wants, doesnt matter if she likes to sprout independent dialogues or not. Her husband and her husband who WILLINGLY married her - doesnt matter the circumstances also - and who willingly took on her responsibility can spend money on her, give her money etc etc.
And by the by, Ab is listing these expenses with full intention to pay back. At least she isn't being a freeloader unlike a certain random stranger living in the Poddar house, there is still a relationship between Ar and her, fully legal and according to such legality, there is no 'emotional manipulation' theory attached.
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