Is she OK? What is she trying to do?

I don't know whether someone has earlier posted this or not, but is this not too much?

I just wanna ask, why the actress is taking everything personally?  I mean people are talking about the character she is playing, but it feels as if she is very much active on social media and very well knows that how much she is being trolled.

Also, why she keeps on defending anupama, I know she can't straight away say that the character she is playing is complete trash, but at least don't go over board to support this character naa, I can understand that it is difficult to say for acters that the character portrayed by them is not good, specially when she is a female lead, but you can say that you are opposite to the character, yaa aaisa kuch bhi, but she talks as if people should start following Anupama.

no one, I am saying no one should even think of following her, agar karna hi hai toh please dig deep into the character and then try to pick nice things and just apply those traits in your life, don't blindly believe what the actress is saying.

and I have also heard that she doesn't share a good off screen chemistry with the other co-acters, is it true? if yes then why so?

Thanks for reading this

If you find any mistakes in spellings or anything then please feel free to correct me.

Thank you.

Bit off topic

but famous personalities like this actress use feminism in very wrong way and other girls get influenced and start behaving like this, this will ruin the image of true feminism.

Also, feminism ke naam par aaj kal people are saying anything and everything, there are some brainless women who actually think that disrespecting elders, bullying old people on social media, talking bad about the opposite gender will make them cool.

This is why I dislike my gen, I mean yahan badtameezi karne se log shayad forward hote hain, then I will be backward only.

Also, why people try to mock Indian culture on social media, specially girls bhai, I agree that there were few practices jo sahi nahi thien, we have laws against those practices, but I have seen this trend that people say like "India mei aaisa hota hai, vaisa hota hai"  Sorry, lekin thodi problem har jagah hoti hai, iska matlab ye nahi ki pura culture hi bekar hai.  But again, I can't ignore this fact that some of the ideas came from our previous gen only, extra woke aur dusre culture mei zaroorat se zyada ghusne ke chakkar mei we started losing our own culture, I hope people in my gen at least realize this.

Every culture is best, but I have never heard people in countries like Japan and many other leaving their own culture, but still see, they are getting progressive, hum toh apna bhi culture chodte jaa rahe hain, aur bahar kaa bhi puri tarah adopt nahi kar paa rahe hain.  Last mei, naa ghar ke rahe naa ghaat ke. accha the funniest part, have we ever observed people of western countries mocking us because we try to copy them and badly fail, bhai my point is that why you wanna even do that, yes, their culture is very good, but why you want to leave your culture.

I am a north Indian, but ngl I love love and love South Indian girls/women for this, they are a perfect combination of being modern and traditional at the same time, look at the women who have achieved so much from South India, I mean you will get that feeling ki haan, ye apne jaisi hi hain, they don't leave their roots, so I love them for this.  They are strong headed, sharp, know how to manage things but at the same time you will feel ki ye toh apni mummy, grandma etc jaisi hi hain, so kudos to them for this, I hope this continues even in the next gen of South India, I hope that some of the traits come to North as well.

Please feel free to correct spelling and grammatical mistakes if any, kuch toh mujhe aaise hi dikh rahe hain, par bohot likh diya hai.

Isse achcha hain koi definitions nikal hi matt. We don't need to limit understanding under the boundaries of "isms".

Har kaam ki izzat honi chahiye phir woh ghar ka ho, Bahar ka ho, ya sanskaar ka ho. Waqt ke saath paribhashayein badalti hain.

Pehle ek ki kamayi se ghar chalta tha aur bhara pariwaar hota tha jise sambhalne ke liye mazboot stambh chahiye tha. Na stree purush ki jurisdiction me kadam rakhte the na purush stree ke. Dono hi ek doosre ke yogdaan ki qadr karte the.

Jaise shayad (for lack of better examples from the show) Leela-Hansmukh.

Kramenh yeh paristhitiya power dynamics me badal gayi aur purush provider se breadwinner banaya aur stree nurturer se carer. Power ki paribhasha earnings se equate hone lagi aur ego ne mutual understanding ko beat kar diya. Saanjhedaari ne distribution of labour ka roop leliya.

May be Vanraj-Anupama.

Isi dauran kahi, yeh samajh aagaya ki ek insaan ki kamayi se ghar sanskaar nahin chal sakta aur purush aur stree donon ko sanskaar ki pathri par chalna hoga. Kambhakt ego ne apni jade mazboot kar rakhi thi aur iska ek maatra vikalp tha, Stree ki kamayi aur occupation purush se kam waqt ki ho taki distribution of labour intact rahe.

Ab ka daur yeh hain ki purush aur stree dono hi sabal hain aur har koi atmanirbhar. Nahin bhi ho toh unhe khud ko sambhalne ke Kai zariye hain. Ab jab purush aur stree saath aate hain toh we jante hain ki sanjhedaari nibhayenge toh bache rahenge nahin toh donon ko hi bhugatna hoga.

Sorry par iss cheez ka iss show me koi udaharan na hain aur na ho sakta.

Bringing things back to topic now. What Anupamaa is doing is neither feminism nor Sanskaar.

Even the most regressive form of Sanskaar will compel a woman to serve abusive in-laws as long as she is married. Once divorced, she is a stranger. I really thank god that this post divorce friendliness is not being portrayed in any other religion, else it would have been blasphemous.

Secondly, going back to people who have time and again been proven abusive, dangerous and even criminal, not only to you but to others as well, and even enabling them, is not love. It's a very negative trait, there is no one word for it but it's a combination of denial (that her womb can never birth demons), fear of missing out (that what if the family actually starts comfortably living without her), and Munchausen syndrome by proxy (of harming your own self and any expendable people to look nice and get attention)

So sanskaar is definitely not her. Coming to feminism, a woman who can't do even one thing without threatening men, coaxing men, falling at the feet of men and marrying a man to get "opportunities" that would not have been given to any other woman or man otherwise, is not a feminist!!!

No real feminist will ever support Anupamaa, who has gotten opportunities simply because a guy is in love with her, or she is great at emotional blackmail specific to maternity, and then flouted them.

I remember back in the day when actresses who portrayed vamps were interviewed, they used to joke about how smart the character is, but also add a footnote that it is just fiction and their fans should not copy them because the characters are horrible people.

But when in Shahi-verse even villains are justifying themselves, then this woman is the apparent positive lead. And mostly the actors are puppets at the hand of production house and channel PR, so I doubt it's any of Rupali's own ideas.

Originally posted by: IWasHareeshFan

I don't know whether someone has earlier posted this or not, but is this not too much?

I just wanna ask, why the actress is taking everything personally?  I mean people are talking about the character she is playing, but it feels as if she is very much active on social media and very well knows that how much she is being trolled.

Also, why she keeps on defending anupama, I know she can't straight away say that the character she is playing is complete trash, but at least don't go over board to support this character naa, I can understand that it is difficult to say for acters that the character portrayed by them is not good, specially when she is a female lead, but you can say that you are opposite to the character, yaa aaisa kuch bhi, but she talks as if people should start following Anupama.

no one, I am saying no one should even think of following her, agar karna hi hai toh please dig deep into the character and then try to pick nice things and just apply those traits in your life, don't blindly believe what the actress is saying.

and I have also heard that she doesn't share a good off screen chemistry with the other co-acters, is it true? if yes then why so?

Thanks for reading this

If you find any mistakes in spellings or anything then please feel free to correct me.

Thank you.

all these actors live in delusional world mostly 

far away from reality of life 

they only meet people like other actors directors who are also far away from reality of life

So when they get success it goes to their head (before her many like amitah bachchan and SRK salman, amir all have had such syndrome)

They start thinking they are that character only not a diff person 

Originally posted by: IWasHareeshFan

 

Thanks for the nice words..

Mai Hyderabadi gal hoon..

Meri CA final ki padayi Delhi mein huyi .. 

Meri “Fair” complexion ki wajah se, luckily, mai koi problem face nahi kiya but meri dost jo itni fair nahi hai.. usse kya kuch nahi kaha., that she is dirty, unclean and unkempt.. Manners nahi hai.. She isn’t well groomed and upar se Mujh se puchte hai, south India mein sab gawar jaise kyun dress up hote hai?

Yeha parties mein hum boys n girls dance karte hai milke par south mein gals gals alag dance karte hai aur boys alag.. kitni narrow mindset hai etc..

If you are fair n good looking.. tum Telugu or Tamil speaking  land se toh nahi ho sakti ho.. kuch log mujhe “Gujarati” samajte the, kuch Bengali.. they used to gimme surprised expressions.. when I say, am from southern part of India..  

I don’t know.. on what basis, they think southerners are not Sophisticated??

Note: Self Experience!

I have a friend from South India (Tn), she is so simple but so updated, I don't know why people here think that wearing crop tops only make you classy, even I wear shorts, but I know what to wear when, also whats with dark looking ho toh acche nahi.

If someone has read MB then Arjun was dark, dark matlab bohot dark, lekin still we have this phaltu kaa bias pata nahi kyun.

Not sure how ppl think south indians are not fair and white or are not sophisticated etc i have traveled north and south both 

For fair they have to just see all heroines from south were so fair even n 50s 

Indeed some of the most  fair ad beautiful ppl women or men come from south only 

Like before vaijayanti mala, hema malini, waheeda rehman, padmini, jayalalitha, sarika, lakshmi, jayapradha, divya bharathi, bhagya shree are all from south only born and ancestors from there - this is only bollywood heroines but if you into pure south india heroines(who never acted in hindi) they all could easily give competition to any bollywood heroine in fairness and beauty from 50s only till now till aishwarya

I have seen some most fair and beautiful girls in south india especially kerala, Karnataka costal region, coorg, tamil nadu etc they are more pretty than aishwarya rai too only thing they never become actress 

Even kashmir and himachal girls cannot compete in beauty from south both beauty and fair skin in some places - if you travel interior to villages in deep costal areas of kerala, Karnataka, goa, tamil nadu, andhra you can see girls more beauty than aishwaray rai or very very fair like western women 

Just that north indians have mis conception that there are no fair women in south 

Even men they are very fair and handsome compared to north men 

Salman or hrithik also is nothing in front of some men i have met in far off places of south while travelling in beauty and looks 

I am not sure how this mis conception that south are not fair enough or drak come - may be from movies 

Also dark skin comes if you are born in hotter places mostly - in south other than western costal area which has heavy rains and mostly wet rest places are mostly hot except in rains. So ppl tend to become darker skinned although born fair because of constant exposure to hot sun. So someone is dark only may mean the place they born are very hot places and lot of exposure to sun

Originally posted by: IWasHareeshFan

Bit off topic

but famous personalities like this actress use feminism in very wrong way and other girls get influenced and start behaving like this, this will ruin the image of true feminism.

hain, par bohot likh diya hai.

How is she using feminism when the actress has clearly said she thinks feminism is over rated and she is against feminism? In fact she is using anti feminism to get popular, in today's India it's easy to be popular if you are anti women rights. 

Originally posted by: IWasHareeshFan

Also, feminism ke naam par aaj kal people are saying anything and everything, there are some brainless women who actually think that disrespecting elders, bullying old people on social media, talking bad about the opposite gender will make them cool.

This is why I dislike my gen, I mean yahan badtameezi karne se log shayad forward hote hain, then I will be backward only.

What does this have to do with feminism? You are talking about rude behaviour which is common in both men and women?

Originally posted by: IWasHareeshFan

Also, why people try to mock Indian culture on social media, specially girls bhai, I agree that there were few practices jo sahi nahi thien, we have laws against those practices, but I have seen this trend that people say like "India mei aaisa hota hai, vaisa hota hai"  Sorry, lekin thodi problem har jagah hoti hai, iska matlab ye nahi ki pura culture hi bekar hai.  But again, I can't ignore this fact that some of the ideas came from our previous gen only, extra woke aur dusre culture mei zaroorat se zyada ghusne ke chakkar mei we started losing our own culture, I hope people in my gen at least realize this.

India is one of the worst and unsafe country for women in every single survey and study. It's not thoda problem, it's a huge problem. 

Culture is fluid, in fact we were way more progressive in earlier eras, we are going backwards. Our God's were always progressive, from Ram to Krishna all taught about not blindly following culture and rituals but to be progressive, Ram taught against untouchability, ramayana was pro woman rights and showed even someone like Ram can be wrong about woman's rights and the wife should leave him.  Krishna was always protecting women rights and advocating woman's right to choose. We were way ahead of america or any other country. That's our culture, not the right wing conservative mess We are becoming today. We are becoming more conservative and more unsafe, Indian government recently passed a bill saying martial rape is not a crime. 

Turning a blind eye to your country's shortcomings doesnt make your country or culture great. The greatest patriots we had all called out and fought evils in Indian cultures, they didn't try to hide them, otherwise we would still be having sati etc and calling it out culture practices.

Originally posted by: IWasHareeshFan

Every culture is best, but I have never heard people in countries like Japan and many other leaving their own culture, but still see, they are getting progressive, hum toh apna bhi culture chodte jaa rahe hain, aur bahar kaa bhi puri tarah adopt nahi kar paa rahe hain.  Last mei, naa ghar ke rahe naa ghaat ke. accha the funniest part, have we ever observed people of western countries mocking us because we try to copy them and badly fail, bhai my point is that why you wanna even do that, yes, their culture is very good, but why you want to leave your culture.

Japan is one of the worst countries in the world for women my dude. So is South Korea, these are extremely sexist countries where women are treated worst than objects. 

Let people choose what they want to and let's not force them to adhere to what you want. That's just moral policing. 

Originally posted by: IWasHareeshFan

I am a north Indian, but ngl I love love and love South Indian girls/women for this, they are a perfect combination of being modern and traditional at the same time, look at the women who have achieved so much from South India, I mean you will get that feeling ki haan, ye apne jaisi hi hain, they don't leave their roots, so I love them for this.  They are strong headed, sharp, know how to manage things but at the same time you will feel ki ye toh apni mummy, grandma etc jaisi hi hain, so kudos to them for this, I hope this continues even in the next gen of South India, I hope that some of the traits come to North as well.

Please feel free to correct spelling and grammatical mistakes if any, kuch toh mujhe aaise hi dikh rahe hain, par bohot likh diya hai.

But that's your preference. Why do you want every single person in India to follow your preference. What if someone doesn't want a woman like their mummy or grandma? Some prefer to be modern, some traditional or some in between. I  can also claim the girls you admire are putting on fake virtues and pretending, etc etc. But it's not true, it's stupid. They are just doing what they are comfortable with. Similarly modern girls or those who want to wear Western stuff etc have their own preferences. They are not trying to be woke or to put men down or hate their culture. They are doing what they find comfortable.

 That's the best thing about living in a democracy where people have rights. People do what they want.

Originally posted by: Harish111

How is she using feminism when the actress has clearly said she thinks feminism is over rated and she is against feminism? In fact she is using anti feminism to get popular, in today's India it's easy to be popular if you are anti women rights. 

What does this have to do with feminism? You are talking about rude behaviour which is common in both men and women?

India is one of the worst and unsafest country for women in every single survey and study. It's not thoda problem, it's a huge problem. 

Culture is fluid, in fact we were way more progressive in earlier eras, we are going backwards. We are becoming more conservative and more unsafe, Indian government recently passed a bill saying martial rape is not crime. 

Turning a blind eye to your country's shortcomings doesnt make your country or culture great. The greatest patriots we had all called out and fought evils in Indian cultures, they didn't try to hide them, otherwise we would still be having sati etc and calling it out culture practices.

 

Japan is one of the worst countries in the world for women my dude. So is South Korea, these are extremely sexist countries where women are treated worst than objects. 

Let people choose what they want to and let's not force them to adhere to what you want. That's just moral policing. 

But that's your preference. Why do you want every single person in India to follow your preference. What if someone doesn't want a woman like their mummy or grandma? Some prefer to be modern, some traditional or some in between. I  can also claim the girls you admire are putting on fake virtues and pretending, etc etc. But it's not true, it's stupid. They are just doing what they are comfortable with. Similarly modern girls or those who want to wear Western stuff etc have their own preferences. That's the best thing about living in a democracy where people have rights. People do what they want.

Again its misconception that south are more traditional than north india 

While south ppl think north are more traditional and wear ghnghat etc and traditional ndian clothes more 

Indeed you must visit some villages of south like in kerala, mangalore, goa, tamil nadu, pondicheery etc 

Women wear very western dresses even regular days in villages in last 20 plus years 

Many girls there work in companies of bangalore, chennai, hyderabad, mumbai and have travelled US, UK on work 

They wear very western dresses when they visit their villages and other girls too started wearing such dresss 

I was surprised that girls on holidays visiting parents were wearing shorts and shirt and doing framing of rice and wheat in south india 

I mean they are BE, MBA work in IT companies but while visiting their villages help parents or grandparents in farming 

Most asian country not good towards women not even japan, south korea, china, dubai, singapore which we in india assume are more nice to women 

But they also objectify women and have certain preference on how girls should look or behave just like other country of asia 

Indeed USA whch is pro woman and woman rights never had one girl president so far 

Originally posted by: myviewprem

Again its misconception that south are more traditional than north india 

While south ppl think north are more traditional and wear ghnghat etc and traditional ndian clothes more 

Agreed, generalizing anything or any region is wrong, I am in Bangalore, one of the most progressive cities for women in India and its in the south.

Originally posted by: myviewprem

Most asian country not good towards women not even japan, south korea, china, dubai, singapore which we in india assume are more nice to women 

But they also objectify women and have certain preference on how girls should look or behave just like other country of asia 

Indeed USA whch is pro woman and woman rights never had one girl president so far 

America is extremely sexist towards older women. They support women only till they are young and pretty. They hate older women. And now with rise of right wing hate women are losing more and more rights. 

 /QUOTE]

Hello, how should I address you?

Alright, this will be a bit long, so please read it leisurely, and sorry for posting such a lengthy message.

Okay, for the first point, I think I misunderstood her intentions. She probably meant something else but said something different. I think there was an article about this too.

I believe she used the term "overrated" incorrectly. If we remove the context and read her article, she probably meant that merely advocating feminism doesn't make someone a feminist. Even a village girl with progressive thinking can be a feminist. If this was her intention, then I think she was right.

However, using International Women's Day to defend a problematic character... I hope you can understand which group of people she was trying to influence.

So, I'll stick to my second point that she is defending a problematic character, and I don't support her on that. Anupama is anything but a feminist.  She is someone who uses everyone like a disposable plate and kaam hone ke baad she throws them away.

Now, let's talk about freedom. Freedom always comes with restrictions.  I am not saying that you should do everything according to the society, but still, there are rules and regulations which should be followed, people may call it moral policing, but then to each their own.

If trolling someone solely based on how traditional they are is their choice, then shouldn't it be my choice as well to express my viewpoint? You might have seen a girl saying that people actually say, "People in South India are uncivilized," because they dress differently. So, this is their choice, so should it not be my choice to say that people who sit and mock someone's culture are anything but civilized?

Yes, I agree that India is very unsafe for women. I never deny that. But will sitting and trolling solve the problem?  Being a girl I can say that even I can't move as freely as a man can move, but does this gives a right to mock someone's culture?

I never said that people should be traditional or they should be like their grandmothers or mothers only. But what kind of mindset is it that only wearing modern clothes makes you progressive? Or if you have traditional thoughts, then you're outdated.

Now let's talk about feminism. I'm never against feminism, but nowadays, a large number of girls and women have come who do anything in the name of feminism. Try saying something to them, there won't even be any context, yet they'll say, "Just because I'm a woman, you're saying this to me." There's no sense in this. But they'll start saying and doing anything with their woman card.

I hope you're seeing what's going on on social media. A girl said, "meri daadi mujhe bolti hai ki dhang ke kapde pehno, mujhe toh bada maza aata hai budhiya ko chidhane mei." Someone is talking about their dad's mom on social media like this, should this not be called out? In the pursuit of being cool, she said such things, and when people pointed it out, she said, "I'm a girl, that's why you all are saying this to me." The same girl said that she will sell her future husband mast future settled. When people called her out, she again started playing the "I'm a girl" card.

Now imagine the same scenario with a guy. Imagine if roles were reversed, what would have happened? His account would be flooded with abuses.

Now tell me, why did she get away with it? Because the person she wanted to sell was her future husband. But in the case of a guy, if he says something like that about a girl, he would be trolled.

Can you tell me when did feminism start meaning all this?

This is pseudo feminism sorry once again.

See, I am no one to judge who should wear what. In fact, right now, as I am writing this, I am wearing... let it be.

But my point is, there's a right place for everything to be worn. We cannot wear anything anywhere. We follow a code of conduct at the office, similarly, there's a code of conduct everywhere. And if someone is advising you regarding that, then you can't say, "It's my choice." I am sorry, you may call me regressive, but it's not your choice. If you are in a public place, then you will have to behave in a certain way so that you don't make anyone uncomfortable around you. You will have to speak in a way that doesn't hurt others. This is all a code of conduct.

If they have the right to twist their eyebrows and say, "Indian culture, huh, whatever," then it's also my right to say what I think is right.

Now, regarding the choice of being modern, yes, it's a choice. But you may not agree, but even a tree cannot survive without its roots. If we want to grow in life, then we should not forget where we come from and what our roots are.

Why do we always get an image of a helpless woman working with tears in her eyes when we hear the word 'traditional'? I am sorry, but this is a wrong image. This is not traditional but regressive.

Shakuntala Devi, Sudha Murthy ji, and many other women are perfect examples of both traditional and modern. But we have created a very wrong image of being traditional.  Also, just by wearing short dresses one can't be modern.

Sorry if I have hurt your emotions in any way, but as you said, people have their own choice, so I just expressed my thoughts.  I hope I have not been disrespectful to you in any way.

Thanks for reading if you have reached this far.