2.1 Ways to kill a mortal~ Abhira x Armaan (part 2 updated)

Author's note:

This would probably be a two or three shots story. The inspiration from this story comes from the plot suggested by pinecone, for the current track when Abhira finds the divorce paper but hypothetically also finds out about Ruhi and Armaan. This part might certainly seems too gloomy and angsty but the confrontations would come eventually and I am as excited to write it as a lot of you might be to read. Feel free to drop any suggestions and feedback. 

Hurricanes...these human shaped hurricanes, these devastating beings disguised as soft flesh and bone. Give your heart to the hurricane and tell him precisely what would hurt you and let him twist the knife. Feel the grief of it, of the betrayal from a trusted being, embrace it and make it a part of your being.

Grief, is a thing with fangs, do not resist it, it stays at your window sill, watching you with its piercing eyes. That grief, is a child waiting for you to put her to bed, to feed her with love. That grief wants a mother because who else would embrace such a monster. Grief is an orphan girl waiting for her mother. And if you ask Abhira, she was the embodiment of grief.

"Mumma...", Abhira cried sitting under the blanket, clutching her pillow close to her heart, to subdue the panic and pain that weighed her chest. "Why did you leave me Mumma, aapne toh meri responsibility ka bojh Armaan ko dediya, par usne bhi mera trust Tod diya...ab aapki yeh chidiya Kahan jaayengi Mumma. Aapko mujhe bhi apne saath le jana chahiye tha...mujhe nahi rehna uss world mein Jahan aap nahi ho."

She had heard the conversation between Armaan and Ruhi at the temple, heard Ruhi's idea of making the eternal declaration of their love. It felt like a punch in the gut and suddenly it all made sense. Ruhi's extreme hostility towards her, Ruhi's constant interference, Armaan's silence when Ruhi would insult Abhira and their relationship, Rohit's suffocation and heartbreak and his sudden disappearance. What did he do to deserve such a heartbreak?

Abira could feel it, a snake wrapping around her throat-whispering sweetness into her ears, while tightening it's hold. But it was certainly too late to notice the bite, to notice what an obtuse fool she had been, while the truth was jazzing right infront of her eyes throughout. But now she could feel the venom replacing her mother's warm blood in her veins. Despite her ability of persistent yapping, always having something to say, something to argue, Abhira couldn't explain the crushing pain she felt in this moment. 

This wasn't the pain of unreciprocated love. It was the pain of trusting someone with fragments of herself that were dead. Humans are Pandora's box personified, all it takes is a cut to realise how deeply poisoned we are. And in this moment, Abhira could feel every bone in her body ache with the sense of loss. The loss of her Mumma's warmth and love and the loss of any genuine human connection she had.

"Where do I put this sadness Mamma? Where? This silence is so loud, it's defeaning, I can't bear it." Abhira could feel the rot of her dreams in her fingernails. The truth was, she needed someone, and today she couldn't be enough for herself. She needed to knock on her mother's door put her head in her lap like a baby and sleep away her miseries. Her home is too quiet and her grief, raw, wild and loud. 

She did what she never thought she would, something she has herself been an warning sign against. This is not your family Abhira. This is not your mumma. This is not your home. But alas,  a starving orphan would eat anything. 

"Ma...", she could barely whisper.

Vidya was taken aback, not by the way Abhira addressed but by the overwhelming warmth and wave of protectiveness that suddenly overtook her, spreading a sense of urgency and care in her heart. Something was wrong, a mother's heart always knows when her child is in pain. Abhira wasn't her blood, but something about the way she could hear her breathe told her she wasn't fine. 

"Abhira....meri bachi, tu theek hai na...Kuch toh bol beta...main sunn rahi hoon. Kuch hua hai?"

"Mumma...", was all that Abhira could manage to say between her sobs and her struggle to breathe.

"Abhira bata mujhe kya hua hai. Armaan ne kuch kaha tujhse? Main dant lagati hoon usey? Kuch toh bol meri bachi."  If Vidya actually tried she could translate Abhira's pain in a language of her own. She could listen to her gut wrenching sobs on the phone, through her whimpers. Because Abhira was chaos, she was always loud but now her silence...terrifyingly gut wrenching.

"Nahi, ussey kuch matt kehna"

"Apni Ma ko nahi batayegi beta..."

And that struck Abhira like lightning. She doesn't want a share love that isn't hers. She is afraid she will drown somebody, and make it sound like a lullaby. This is not my home. This is not my Mumma. And she cuts the call. This betrayal was hers to deal with, she couldn't even begin to imagine the ways it would crush Vidya to know the truth. This wasn't her truth, this wasn't her mumma. Perhaps, her only comrade today was this grief...the creature awaiting her embrace. And she would nurture it, in the hope that one fine day, like any other monster her hunger would be satiated and it would leave. For now everything feels like a wound within this tiny space she has caved in, but there is nowhere else she would rather heal.

_________________________

Armaan could feel the grief heavy in the air, as if this house stood as a metaphor of all the bad things that could happen to her, Abhira, this was her home, or was it? He was scared he had tainted the sanctity of this place and the peace it brought her by his betrayal. He did not know what was he thinking, or was he thinking at all. 

Now as he entered the dark room, he could feel the ghost of his mistakes dancing under the dim light falling from the atrium window. Ghosts are guilt and ghosts are secrets and he has let them run wild for too long and the consequences were right in front of his eyes. 

He kneeled down beside the bed on which Abhira had curled into a small shell and fallen asleep. He saw the papers she was clutching and he dreaded his intuition about the contents of the paper were right. He had hurt her yet again, and this time he might not deserve the warmth of her forgiveness. He was about to commit a greater sin today, permanently besmirching the sanctity of his relationship with Abhira, but he stopped, rather his fate made him and he ran away, from his own lies and problems, just like he has been running all along. But this time he needed to clear his head, and he did, he knew what he had to do. 

He gently kept a hand on her cheek, rubbing away the trail of tears. She had certainly cried herself to sleep, and the voice note he received from Vidya only reaffirmed his fears. And he hated himself for not being there to comfort her, to tell her the entire truth and come clean.

"I am sorry Abhira. Main tumhe kabhi dard nahi Dena chahta tha", he sobbed.

"Par Maine tumhe dard ke Siva aur kuch nahi diya. Pata nahi tum mujhe maaf kar paogi ya nahi, par main tumhara sapna nahi tootne dunga. Main tumhara har sapna pura karna chahta hoon, tumhe har Khushi Dena chahta hoon. Main woh dost bana chahta hoon Jo tum deserve karti ho, Jo tumhe woh support de Jo tum mujhe deti hoon, Jo sirf tumhare liye fight kare."

"I have lied to you Abhira, a lot. But I promise i will come clean, i will tell you everything from the beginning aur fir choice tumhari hogi. Main tumhe selfishly apne paas nahi rakhunga par main tumhari dhaal banuga, main tumhara sapna nahi tootne dunga. Tumhe woh har Khushi milegi Jo tum deserve karti ho, Jo main tumhe kabhi de nahi paya."

He gently kissed her forehead and sat there holding her hand with utmost care but with a grip firm enough to remind him that she is still there, she is fine, atleast physically. And he slipped into a slumber unaware of the disaster that awaited them, the disaster that would completely change their lives. 

Beautifully written 

Great descriptions of abhira emotions and feelings 

This was SO beautiful. Heartbreaking. But so well written. Abhiras feelings are so raw. It makes me tear up. The way she wants to confide but feels no haq to confide in Vidya. Beautifully captured. Armaan on the other hand , I want him to pay. He broke Abhira. For no fault. :( 

Please update soon! 

Would most probably post it today😊

Post soon. Mood kharab hai with episode. 

2.2 Ways to kill a mortal ~ Abhira x Armaan

Author's note: This is probably a very long update and not what most of you would be expecting. I would appreciate any inputs and feedback. There's a reason I have made the characters react the way they do herein, so we are open for discussion. And initially this was supposed to be TS but i guess it might extend upto three or four. 

Vidya could feel the history repeating itself, just that in this version the characters had changed, her own son and daughter in law were the traitors, but still the people she had put her faith in. She sat on the sofa with a thud, briefly looking at her husband's guilt ridden face, and she wondered if he could now see the glimpses of all his mistakes and betrayals in Armaan, the way she saw them staring right back at her when the truths bombs about Armaan and Ruhi's relationship were dropped. And it was Manisha who found out, Ruhi's doodling of her name with Armaan's. And the moment they returned back home from Mussoorie, she didn't wait for a second before she confronted her in front of the entire family, and it was only a matter of a few loud and triggering questions, and Ruhi spilled everything, how Armaan led her on and continues to do so, how they have always been in love with each other. For a moment it all felt like a nightmare, it seemed unreal.

"Even Armaan wants to get rid of Abhira. Woh apni family se dur ho raha hai... only because of Abhira. I took the divorce papers because I understand his dilemma, he feels responsible for Abhira and he would feel guilty about leaving her but the truth is he wants to be with me, he even went to the temple with me to carve the eternal mark of his genuine feelings for me."

And throughout Ruhi's whining and confession, Vidya couldn't bear to look at Armaan because it would only make her resent his face, his blood, after all the apple doesn't fall too far away from the tree. Betrayal and unfaithfulness was etched in his soul. But this was the child she brought up, the child she fed with love, the child who knew of her miseries and her grief, would he commit the sin of putting another woman through the same pain he has hated his father for putting her through?

Pain...Vidya glanced at Abhira, but her demeanor gave away nothing. She stood there like a shell of herself, blankly staring at her feet. It scared Vidya. It scared her to think how this might kill Abhira's spirit, her innocence, her hopes and her faith. Life has been harsh enough on her and neither did this family treat her as their own. Maasa loved Ruhi, but would she let that cloud her judgement and allow this injustice against Abhira? Vidya didn't know, with all that was happening, she didn't know if she could trust anybody in the family to understand her, not even herself.

So in the heavy quietness that weighed the giant halls of th  Poddar mansion, she stood up, knowing how everybody's eyes followed her in anticipation, and she silently stood beside Abhira, enveloping her hand in hers, as a symbol of her her unwavered support. She gently kept a hand on Abhira's cheek, prompting her to look up. 

But Abhira kept her eyes closed. Vidya didn't know how she understood, but she did, she could feel the panic and grief that Abhira was feeling and she could feel her need to keep her gaurds up. And Vidya didn't blame her for  her lack of belief in this family to do the right thing, It was a coping mechanism perhaps, because grief is a house where nowhere protects you, and Abhira had lost the one person capable of bringing her out of these shackles.

"Look at me Abhira, you don't have to hide" Vidya whispered softly. And what stared back at her was more heart wrenching than her tears would have been. It's like there was a void, a distant darkness that has shrouded her warm, kind eyes, as if she was disassociating herself from the pain, as if her spirit had travelled a distance away from her body leaving behind a hollowness difficult to decipher.

"It's too late. Everybody go back to your rooms, we will have this discussion tomorrow", Kveri said in her usual stoic manner.

"Not today Maasa, there won't be anymore skeletons in the closet. No more of pushing the matters under the rug. For the women of this house, the ground is only stable, till they kneel. And Abhira won't kneel, I won't let her." Vidya was rigid with her stand.

"What do you think of me Vidya? What do you imply? I will decide on the matter tomorrow. And I will be fair. I need time to think."

"This entitlement is what I am talking about Maasa. Who are we to decide? This is Abhira's life."

Vidya turned to Abhira and continued, "I don't know how you do this each time Abhira, this inconceivable strength that makes you, the way you look into danger's mouth and see no cemetery or death. But you don't have to anymore, you don't have to deal with our abuses and harshness anymore, you don't have to defend yourself anymore. You came with a fire, you came back with a voice,  you will leave with your voice. I won't let anybody stamp over your spirit, like they have been doing with each other for so long."

"This is a family matter Vidya, we take the decisions together. Do not forget how this would impact our image socially."

"Oh now Abhira is a part of the family? Wasn't she an outcast to you Maasa? And if not, why was she never allowed to sit on the table with us? Why did we all conveniently disrespect her dead mother and her upbringing?", Vidya questioned.

"I don't see what's there to decide, why is there anything to decide. Ruhi and Armaan have been deceiving us all this while. They deceived my Rohit, they lied, and instead of mourning my Rohit's death they are dreaming of having a life together. If you were always in love why even marry someone else in the first place, why didn't you tell us, why did you have to destroy two innocent lives?"

"We made a sacrifice Ma, Armaan wanted Rohit to have his happiness..." Ruhi tried to justify.

"What sacrifice Ruhi? The only sacrifice you made is the lives, hopes and dreams of these two people. Did Rohit know? Is that why he left? Is that why he was so shook?", Vidya walked towards Armaan and held his collar. "Answer me you coward".

Yes! Ruhi prompted.

And Vidya stumbled a step back. However, Manisha was quick to hold her and make her sit. Perhaps this was the price, of feeding snakes, of giving heart and home to these children of hurricane. In those few seconds, Vidya could feel a tapestry of her wounded life running in front of her eyes, where did she go wrong?

Armaan kneeled before her, "I feel lost Ma, guide me. I probably have lost the right to seel any semblance but I am sorry, I really am, I know I have hurt you, and deserve the worst of your panishments, I deserve the worst from Abhira. I don't want anything Ma, I know I have wronged you. Tell me what to do."

"Don't you ever dare to call me your Ma again".

Armaan stared at her in horror, finding all his fears staring right back at him.

"You...are not my son, you cannot be. My son wouldn't do what you did. My son wouldn't hurt an innocent woman. My son wouldn't stab his brother in the back. My son...was Rohit. You...I don't know who you are. But you are not mine, you were never my blood, and you aren't my heart either", Vidya stood up and walked to Abhira.

"You are screamed at, and then you stand up for yourself. You think it's a defense tactics. But it just provokes more screaming. So you go silent, and that provokes screaming too, but at least the threats are at bay. So you learn to remain silent, learn to lose your voice, you learn to play dead....I know how this house works Abhira. We are a broken family tree, we elders have taken an axe to our foundation and passed destruction to our generations. We are a family of lawyers but we are all emotional abusers. And I am so sorry, it took me this long to realise the trauma and pain we have caused you." And Vidya finally saw it...a single tear drop running down Abhira's cheek. Her eyes seemed like the loneliest creatures on earth. So scared, yet somehow so determined. Yearning for someone to see what's behind them but also wanting to hide.

"Careful about what you say Vidya.  Armaan has made a mistake but this family is perfect. The world knows."

Vidya couldn't understand how Kaveri could still proudly say that. Perhaps, it was her fear of her own failure but it was time for everybody to accept their reality and Vidya wouldn't stop.

"Perfect...only on the surface, only for the outside world. We have been like the broken pieces of the same mosaic, we have hurt each other beyond repair, we stay ignorant of our sins. You are selfish and deep down you know that, you ignore the sufferings of your own daughter, Kajal, to keep your damaad in your firm, you undermine your own son, Manoj, you claim to be the matriarch but all you have ever done is kill the dreams of the woman in this family, you take pride in your upbringing but the truth is not a single child of your hasn't failed you. Sanjay ji is just a narcissistic abuser who will stoop down to levels to achieve what he wants, who weaponises his dominance to supress his wife and his children, and YOU maasa keep up with that for your own benefit. You claim to care about the family, but all you care about, is yourself. Armaan is a cheater, Ruhi has no qualms getting intimate with her own brother in law, these people have earned your bias and favour in the family, only because they don't question your ways."

Abhira, held Vidya's hand in an attempt to stop her. "You don't have to do this Ma, not for me. I was never a part of this family, I never belonged here, but you do. I can stand up for myself."

On the surface, Abhira had a successful facade of her perpetual strength but to Vidya she sounded defeated, she looked tired and this time she won't allow her to fight alone.

"I am doing this for myself Abhira, for my years of silence. I am doing this for my son, and I am doing this for my daughter. I have lost all my children Abhira, I am not losing you. You entered this house as Armaan's wife, you will leave this house with me, as my daughter," Vidya spoke affectionately rubbing Abhira's tears, aware of the impact her words have had.

"You wouldn't do that Vidya, you wouldn't abandon your family for this girl. I accept what happened with her is wrong. We will fund her education, and then she can leave," Kavery tried to reason.

"I am not a charity case. I don't need your money. I will manage on my own. Nobody has to leave, and nobody has to ask me to stay."

"Maa, I am the one who is in the wrong, punish me, evict me, you don't have to leave, neither does Abhira, she deserves to stay", Armaan begged.

"I won't give you any penance by punishing you Armaan. You shall drown in your own guilt, remain trapped in the glass cage that you have built yourself. Today, I am relieving myself, from any responsibility I had towards you, or this family, and I relieve you of the promise you made to Abhira's mother. It's my responsibility now. Abhira won't stay in company of her abusers, and i leave with her, I stay there till she needs me, and I will make sure she fulfills her dreams. And before you express your dissent, just know that I am not seeking any approval either Maasa. Today I choose for myself and I choose for my daughter."

This family often reminded her that life isn't fair, but what a cruel, sadistic notion is that to revel in. What a terrible response to a child's budding sense of ethics. But nothing has ever stopped Abhira from asking it to be made fair, nothing ever would. Abhira would always have a voice and Abhira would always use it.

"I have never had a family, I will probably never have one. But my Mumma gave me life, she gave me home, she gave me love and she taught me how to give...life, home and love. You all have been kind enough to keep me here, you have been kind enough to feed me. And I am sorry for being the burden that I was. But I would take a leave with my head held high. I don't owe anything to anybody. Perhaps an apology, perhaps a promise but I don't owe you a sacrifice, neither do I demand one Vidya maa," Abhira spoke, her voice barely above a notch.

Maybe she was scared, of anything and everything that felt like home, that felt like belongingness when everything in her life, every breathe out of her body was shaped like snatching, anything she held close. She would take the care from a distance but nothing too close, nothing that felt like home. But Vidya knew what a slow death it is, when you refuse to let others help you and she wouldn't let Abhira sabotage herself.

"This is no sacrifice Abhira, this is my penance, this is my redemption. A mother who has lost her child, could only ask for one glance of the child she has lost. I haven't lost yet, you are my child and you are my light."

The silence echoed among the humongous walls of this big, cursed mansion. The air weighed heavy with the strength of Vidya's resolution, with Armaan's realisation of his shortcomings and failure, his guilt and his loss, with Kaveri Poddar's final awareness of her broken family tree and the reflection of her flawed upbringing, with the remorse of the elders in the family, with Ruhi's selfishness and with Abhira's grief and determination. What followed next was not how anybody expected the turn of events to be.

This is just perfect. That you so much for this different approach and perspective. I always felt abhira being silent since charu affair revealed was a iindication that she is broken terribly. Everyone are blaming abhira to silently hearing insults of her parents and not speaking up, but for me it was unexpected shock for abhira which she couldn't handle. The only person whom she trusted blindly to find solace in this selfish world and the people who she considered as family are leaving her side one by one in a very hurtful way. Sometimes, silence speak louder than word and here it expresses her deep pain.

oh my this is SO wonderful, I am glad Vidya took a stand and is going to leave with Abhira.

Absolutely loved it. so emotional too

Look forward to Vidya-Abhira moving out and finding a mother-daughter relationship that is not of blood but out of a pure connect. I want them to be each other's cheerleaders and support and see them happy away from the Poddars. It will take time to let go of all the pain and angst but they can do it together. 

Your writing is simply beautiful, capturing the essence of raw emotion and complex human connections with every word. It paints vivid pictures of love, betrayal, and redemption, inviting readers to immerse themselves in the intricacies of the characters' lives. With your talent for storytelling, you create narratives that resonate deeply with the heart, leaving a lasting impression on those who read them.

Keep writing more and more and more. 

Take love.