You can't see me

You can't see me

I'm looking at you. Is that you? Are my thoughts and my wishes addressed only to you? That worries me. I don't want to wake up tomorrow and think that I haven't seen you. I'm looking at you... Again that feeling that I made a mistake somewhere. We've been together for so long, and yet I have this feeling that I'm missing something. I love you, I know that, but I feel that this is not it. My confusion is increasing as days, months, years pass. Did I feel that I could love someone else? That. And that feeling of emptiness, when I sit next to you and when I watch you play with our son... A thousand questions, but no answers.

How long do we know each other? Do I know you, you as my love, as someone whom I met once upon a time and who is still here. They say that a man can hide his true self from another person for 35 days, and the two of us have been together for ten years. And yet somehow I feel that it is not my life.

This morning I woke up next to you and thought: you, me and our son, who snuck in between us and who is everything in the world to both you and me. I look at you, and it's like you're strangers. What is happening to me? My son, who can get everything when he looks at me with those green eyes, and the feeling of emptiness cannot go away

I have to do something. I have to see you to see myself. And I have to accept this reality. I live someone else's life. I'm not me. I miss myself. That's the bottom line. I don't see myself. When I'm me, I'll probably think of you too.

When you proposed to me, you thought it was strange that I kept quiet, that I didn't answer right away. Now I know the reason. I was afraid that I would lose myself and that happened.

I lost a part of myself that I miss. The best part. The one I admired and you admired. A bit wild, but full of faith in something better and more beautiful. I loved walking barefoot on the hot asphalt while the summer rains fell. To sing with the company in the small hours in front of the building, to play between two fires. I watch our son grow up. He walks with us, rides a bicycle with us, there is no real one, our childhood. I was free, like a bird, and now... Our son is not free. I keep him in a cage. It's my fault, I don't want to worry. And my freedom is now somewhere far from me. I look anxiously at our son, so that he doesn't hit himself, that he doesn't get hurt, and I think that's the reason why I lost myself. I don't let him be free. And that's why I lost myself and you somewhere. We devoted ourselves to our career, home and child, and lost ourselves. I would like for us to meet and for the rest of our lives not to be spent searching for ourselves.

I'm looking at you. You slowly wake up and I see you, but you don't see me. You see what I'm projecting, but I'm not there.

Please, let's make an effort to see each other. Even though I love you more than anything in the world, I'm lost and I need you to see me.

After so many years together, why is feeling so lonely?

She is feeling all lost and invisible. She has lost the connection to herself. She is no the person she was.

Its time for her to take charge and change things. Bring back the missing spark and start living.

Originally posted by: coderlady

After so many years together, why is feeling so lonely?

it is very difficult when someone loses himself. That's the hardest.

Originally posted by: coderlady

She is feeling all lost and invisible. She has lost the connection to herself. She is no the person she was.

just like that, she is no longer the person she was

Originally posted by: coderlady

Its time for her to take charge and change things. Bring back the missing spark and start living.

I wrote this story when I was traveling on the bus, the woman sitting in front of me complained that she no longer had time for herself and that her husband neglected her due to his obligations.