Author's Note
Hi everyone! 😊
Neither do I have any idea whether Sanjivani 2 team would focus on Shashank and Juhi as a pair or not, nor do I know whether people want to see Shashank and Juhi as a pair or not. I don't even want to argue about whether mentor-protegee relationship is a happening thing or not. All I know is I liked them as a pair as soon as I got the first vibe when I felt that they might be shown as a pair this time - the scene where Shashank asks Anjali to call Juhi. Wanted to write something on them so here I am. 😊❤️
Before today, I have mostly written stories on Rajeev Khandelwal's serials. It feels like eternity that I am writing on a series which doesn't have Rajeev in it. Unlike many people of Sanjivani's forum - I am rather Shashank-Juhi fan than Sid-Ishani's. 😊
I don't have much knowledge about medical terms, so forgive me if I commit any mistake. I won't actually much focus on technicalities of doctors, I would rather focus on Juhi and Shashank's chemistry here. So all those who are looking forward to anything related to doctors and anything technical, this story ain't the right place for that.☺️😛
All those who don't know my writing technique, I would like to clarify that I usually use the original scenes - original dialogues, putting light on their emotions while they uttered those words in the serial. Adding into it my own story - anything and everything I imagined them to show but they didn't or would have loved to watch had they continued the scene further. So please don't blame me for using the same dialogues. Because there's where my interest lies - using the original dialogue - focusing on the feelings and continuing the story further. 😊
Talking about this particular story here, it is an amalgamation of Season 1, 2 and my own cooked up story. 😊 I'll try to keep the story short but as for now I have no idea about the length of the story.😉 I hope you'll enjoy my first story on Dr. Shashank and Dr. Juhi. 😳
Thank you! 😊
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*Flashback*
How does it feel to sustain a life without parents? The question is as difficult for a person having their parents with them as it is difficult for a person who doesn't have them in his or her life. The mere thought of losing your parents can shatter your heart into pieces.
Who says that professional life and personal life are two different things? No, they aren't! Not at least for doctors who deal with the emotions of their patients as much as they deal with their personal emotions about personal matters. Life and death are as much important part of their lives as they are of any common person. It is a shame if they are still tagged as - heartless! No, they are not heartless but may be strong enough to keep their emotions at bay at the time of their duty.
Juhi, who has lost her parents at an early age of her life. Who has been brought up by her Beeji, feels the hollowness; the crave for having her parents in her life, for the umpteenth time today.
Who knew that this marriage, would give her a reason to feel aloof and lonely? The smile of happiness on realizing that two people who were in love with each other are finally getting married that too in Juhi's place - Sanjivani - a place which is more like a home to her, gives Juhi immense satisfaction. Afterall as a doctor, her duty is to take care of the people around her; to give them reason to smile by eradicating problems from their lives to whatever extent she can. But this feeling of being all alone - why does it engulf her every now and then and the otherwise strong Juhi gets overpowered by this lonely Juhi?
Kanyadan! Not only is this ritual a matter of pride for all the parents of all the daughters, but it is an emotional moment too for all the parents and their daughters. They say they are blessed who in their lifetime get a chance to perform the kanyadan. But not only are the people who get this opportunity blessed but the daughters are blessed equally when their parents perform the kanyadan of theirs.
Juhi, who hasn't got the privilege to have her parents in her life for long, fails to stay unaffected by this incident. Without much force the thought enters her mind - who would perform her kanyadan? And in such an emotional moment she misses her parents all the more than she misses them each day. Not before today has she ever thought from the perspective of a girl who is about to get married. Hence, her eyes well up in no time.
She tries, she tries hard to mind her tears, not wanting them to spill by any means. But hell this emotion of being all alone amidst so many people; of being 'different' from others - merely because she doesn't have parents, makes it difficult for her to control her tears. She needs to escape from the eyes of others so that she could cry her heart out without disturbing anyone or attracting the attention of all. Such is our Dr. Juhi, dealing with her crises and emotions all alone. Plastering a smile on her face even at the times of her weakness and sorrow.
She, never taking her eyes - now filled with tears, away from the father-daughter duo, takes backward steps - wanting to escape from this situation. Yes, had she turned away altogether from the heart piercing moment, it would have been easy for her to deal with this emotion. But sometimes, the pain and hurt have their own pleasure. May be the mere fact that this moment in front her eyes, has given her a reason to remember her parents and visualize them in place of the parents performing the 'kanyadaan' and herself in place of the bride, is reason enough to give Juhi satisfaction and hence makes it impossible for her to even blink her eyes which might result in skipping an important and heartwarming situation between the bride and the parents.
As the tears roll down her cheeks, Juhi with her eyes filled with fresh tears, looks through the corner of her eyes, turning all crimson red out of hesitation - just to make sure that none is noticing her.
'Beeji mere Mummy-Papa hote to itna hi pyar karte na mujhse?',
thinks Juhi, looking heavenwards, a sad smile stretching on her lips.
Little does she know that someone has noticed the sudden shift in her mood. And not has he noticed but has got affected too!
The smile on his face has vanished suddenly. The relaxed brows have creased themselves. Where on one hand he wants to reach Juhi to know what has brought the shift in her mood, there on the other, he wants to stay away from her just to read her, understand her emotions. These tangled emotions suffocates him - make him to feel helpless.
'Badi yaad aa rahi hai apki Beeji.',
thinks Juhi, looking heavenwards - a means to control the rolling down of her tears. Smile still plastered on her face.
She shuts her eyes, trying to calm down her nerves; trying to console herself for the umpteenth time that everything is going to be fine!
Shashank - her mentor, turns restless. He tries to peep at her through the crowd of people.
Is she fine? Or am I reading her way too much? - wonders a puzzled Shashank, eager to know what is going on in Juhi's mind. His posture all calm and composed apart from his creased brows, but the turmoil in his heart at the moment - because of Juhi's shift in mood - only he knows!
She surely is upset about something - he is confident about it. With that confidence in his judgement about Juhi, Shashank walks to her - leaving the crowd.
Standing at a corner, all drowned into the thoughts of her life; her Biji, Juhi doesn't realize that she had been followed by someone uptil here.
A concerned Shashank, standing at a distance from Juhi, still doesn't say anything and rather chooses to witness her reactions to the change in her own mood. He finds her all sad and drowned into deep thoughts.
Unable to waste another moment, he walks towards her, never taking his eyes off her. His brows knitted together still. It would get relaxed only when he gets to hear Juhi. Gets to know the reason behind her sadness.
Reaching her, he stands behind her, locking his hands in front of him, tilting his head a little towards his left - his usual style, when he tries to lay stress or focus on something. Juhi stays unaware of his presence behind her. That gets Shashank all the more serious - the fact that she hasn't yet acknowledged his presence there. Something surely is not right with her.
He chooses to break the ice and get her attention.
"Dr. Singh!",
he addresses her, his tone all strict and demanding.
As if by reflex action his voice makes Juhi to turn around immediately, simultaneously skipping her heartbeat as she firstly didn't expect him to be calling her for something; secondly because of her doctor's instinct - is everything fine? Is there any emergency? Or else why would he suddenly reach her and desire to talk to her?
The widening of her eyes and the sudden change in the colour of her cheek's skin depicts her state well. She surely is holding her breath at this moment. Only when Shashank explains the reason of his suddenly calling her, will Juhi be able to get back to her normal state.
Clumsily, trying to calm down her nerves, Juhi turns completely towards him. Keeping her eyes lowered out of hesitation, out of awkwardness of getting caught crying, that too by none other than Dr. Shashank, someone whom deep down she has started admiring. She out of hesitation tuckes her hair behind her left ear.
Shashank, understanding her state, gives her her much needed space, skipping to look towards her directly - helping her to make this situation less awkward for her.
"Sir!",
she says simultaneously while she turns to look towards him and finds him standing with his whole body turned towards his right.
Though not looking towards her directly, Dr. Shashank with his maturity and intelligence succeeds in reading her well. None of her clumsy action goes unnoticed by him.
His now knitted brows are not a result of any irritation or strictness on his intern but it is rather a means to hide his concern for his intern; for his protegee.
But why are you hiding your concern from her Shashank? Don't you think it would be easy for you to deal with Juhi if you try to talk to her on personal level? Why that strict tone? Cannot a teacher; a mentor, turn friendly and polite towards their students sometimes - when they don't need the words of motivation but the words of concern?
"Ye jo.. ah... Obstructive Jaundice ka jo patient hai na...",
saying so Dr. Shashank finally gives himself permission to look towards Juhi to know how much has she recovered from her earlier state of sadness.
His using the word 'ah...' is prove enough to explain that he doesn't really have anything important to talk about to Juhi - on professional front. It is just a means to initiate a conversation, which he secretly desires, reaches its goal - distracting Juhi from her earlier thoughts and sadness.
He is not a man of many words. Even the way of showing his affection to anyone is.. a bit weird. Amalgamation of strictness and care - where strictness is the constituent with higher percentage and hence sometimes people fail to realize the care in his strictness.
The same goes for Juhi too! She doesn't yet realize his true motive of initiating this conversation. And gradually she from Juhi turns back into Dr. Juhi mode. Her mind gets bubbled up with all professional thoughts. But her eyes remain cascaded, as she knows they are still moist and she might get caught by her mentor. She definitely doesn't want that.
Nervously, Juhi sets the tendril of her hair behind her ear. Her fingers interwining. She rubs her tears again - just to make sure that not even a trace of it is left on her face.
Dr. Shashank after having said this much, lowers his eyes, giving himself time to think how should he continue this conversation and at the same time buying time to gauge Juhi's mood. Is she fine now?
Shashank - 'Is she fine now?' instead of thinking it silently, why don't you ask her directly? Afterall she is standing just next to you. The three words - 'Are you fine?' are they too lengthy? Will they consume much of your time? Well, I believe your trying to figure out what exactly you need to say to her - is taking way more time than it will take to utter these three words! But of course for that you have to shed your hesitation.
What a coincidence no Shashank? Not only is Juhi hesitant in front of you at this moment, but you are hesitating too in front of her - reasons though are different, but hesitation - it binds you both at this moment.
As for Juhi, she fails to understand that more than the case Shashank is talking about, it is her mood and well being he is concerned about.
"Ji Sir!",
replies Juhi immediately. Her low voice tells Shashank how she is not in her best of moods to reply to this question of his.
No denial, her mood affects Shashank. Not wanting to make Juhi aware of it, he quickly adds,
"Uski surgery hai to... pre-operative investigation ho chukey honge."
It is a measure to control his emotions. He knows he has to stay strict and at the same time he knows this too that if he starts speaking to her politely, in a friendly way, she might get all the more emotional. He wants his favourite student to turn into a strong doctor. Keeping her emotions at bay, only then will she be able to treat her patients. Afterall isn't this exactly he has been doing all these years? Hiding all the turmoils and chaos of his life and smiling for his patients - to provide them their much needed strength. Isn't this exactly what one expects from a doctor?
He notices tear rolling down her right cheek but doesn't point it out. Juhi doesn't realize that tear is rolling down her cheek and hence doesn't wipe it off.
"Anyway kal subah tak ye sub taiyar rakhna. Okay?",
he says, almost like orders, still not turning to look towards her and waits for her reply - if she has something to say. Deep down he expects her to speak to him about what is going on in her mind, only then will he be able to extend a helping hand towards her. But to his utter dismay it doesn't happen.
"Sir!",
this is all she replies - a gesture of accepting his order.
That does sink his heart a little. She hasn't elaborated it. She hasn't made any effort to share with him the cause of her sorrow.
Juhi wipes off her tear, her eyes lowered.
"Aur haan ek aur baat....",
says Shashank, shaking his feet a little - a gesture that indicates his desire to know what's bothering her; suffocation of being unable to understand is she still thinking about it? Will she return back her earlier state as soon as he leaves?
"Iss surgery mein aap...",
he knits his brows tighter - a means to hide his nervousness before performing his next action.
Whilst speaking the further words and hence hiding his nervousness and hesitation behind the words, he forwards his hanky in front of Juhi,
"...mujhe assist karengi!"
Juhi accepts it from him, forgetting to focus on the fact that her mentor has shown his concern to her silently by his gesture of offering his hanky to her, as her mind is already preoccupied in obeying to his orders.
Saying so, Shashank leaves quickly in order to escape from this awkward situation which is as new to him as it is to her.
"Okay Sir!",
replies Juhi, her eyes lowered out of hesitation. Her forehead creased as she still hasn't recovered completely from her state. It is more like obeying to the orders of your mentor when your mind has stopped working for sometime; when your heart is filled with emotions of sadness, dismay and longing. Longing to meet your family members.
Within seconds Juhi realizes that he silently, without showing his emotions towards her, has helped her by giving her his hanky. This side of his, Juhi is witnessing for the first time. He does care! - the realization brings a smile on Juhi's face. And she even feels that finally she is not alone in this new city. She has someone to rely on. The realization makes her heart to flutter with joy. Smile doesn't seem to be wanting to leave her face.
She quickly turns to look towards Shashank and finds him walking away already, not turning at all.
*Flashback ends*
Where on one hand Dr. Shashank sitting in his cabin all engrossed in thinking about this incident that took place between him and Dr. Juhi in the past, is deep down anxious to talk to Juhi to know what is going on in her mind about the whole fiasco that took place last night at Juhi's place, there on the other, Dr. Juhi who is walking towards Dr. Shashank's cabin is all nervous to face him!
No, she hasn't committed any mistake that she is afraid to face her boss. It is rather the boss who has committed something that Juhi doesn't understand why she is unable to bring herself to categorize as a 'mistake'!
But this she knows that she is hurt!
Only if someone could explain Juhi that there is a difference between being hurt and being nervous, then today would have been a different situation between her and Shashank. Only if she could understand that what she is feeling isn't hurt or pain, it is rather disappointment and nervousness.
Disappointed about the fact that because of his feelings for her she lost her job. Disappointed that why didn't he just tell her about his feelings the very day he chose to throw her out of Sanjivani. May be just may be... they could have found out a solution together. Were his feelings that important? Does he value his feelings way more than valuing her career?
She is hurt because she cannot bring herself to think her mentor as her lover or life partner... whatever!!
The sudden knitting of her brows explains how she is disappointed all because of Dr. Shashank.
But in moments she remembers the moments she had spent with him. Every moment spent with him had left a forever mark in her heart. A smile stretches on her lips without her realizing its happening.
Their first meeting!
Their first hand shake!
His lending of his handkerchief to her for the first time!
His first appreciation!
His first scolding!
'Dr. Shashank ne agar mujhe Sanjivani se nikala hai, to iske peeche zarur koi professional wajah rahi hogi.'
But after remembering those beautiful moments, Juhi doesn't realize why and when her own words from the previous night fill her mind and snatch away her smile of happiness and excitement from her face!!!
She looks towards the door pushing which she is about to enter Dr. Shashank's cabin and face him. She reads the name plate that reads 'Dr. Shashank Gupta - Chief Executive Officer'
'Wo wajah professional nahi thi! Personal thi!',
Anjali's declaration yet again results in increasing the rate of Juhi's heartbeat.
'KYUNKI YEIN... APSE PYAR KARTE THE!'
As Juhi remembers these words of Anjali, she unconsciously tightens the hold on the file she is carrying in her hands. Her brows knit together.
'RATHER PYAR KARTE HAIN!'
Juhi whilst remembering these words turns back to look towards the name plate again as if it is not just the name, but Shashank himself standing there. She tries to understand what she wants to say to him regarding this matter - does she want to scold him? does she want to warn him to stay away? does she want to ask him why? or may be when? or is it - how?
But finds herself clueless about what she exactly wants. Finds herself in a state of clumsiness. Finds herself.... speechless!
Finally, clearing her mind whilst taking a deep breath, Juhi peeps into Dr. Shashak's cabin through the glass panel of his otherwise wooden door and knocks it for asking permission. She finds him sitting on his chair with his back turned towards her - that explains that he is completely clueless of his presence there.
The knock drags Shashank out of his thoughts about Juhi - days when he was her mentor.
"Come in!",
he says, without turning to know who it is.
Opening the door, holding the handle, Juhi peeps into Shashank's cabin and asks his permission,
"May I come in?"
Her voice skips Shashank's heartbeat as he didn't expect her reaching to him for whatever reason might it be. He quickly swivels his chair to give her his proper attention. The glow in his eyes - skips Juhi's heartbeat. He is certainly elated to find her there, as if he had lost the hope of seeing her again in his cabin - where they will be alone! Get time to spend time - all alone in each other's company, but of course at professional level. He bends forward a little towards his desk staring her - a gesture of permitting her in and giving her his full attention.
No, he is not smiling - because he is confused and anxious! Confused about her mood and manners towards himself and anxious to know the same. Is she angry? Is she normal with him just like before? Is it more than just being normal - between them now? Na! Let's strike the third option because it can never happen! Last night he got clues enough to understand that at least nothing would be just like before between them henceforth!
Juhi of course is as much in awkward situation as Shashank is. But as a doctor she has her duty and responsibility to perform and therefore she cannot just let go of her patient - Shashank, only because of their personal issues. Before entering his cabin she made sure that whatever happens inside the cabin between Shashank and herself shall be at professional levels. No person discussions she would indulge into with him.
Understanding that he is permitting her to get; knowing that he would never deny her presence, she gets in - her gestures and looks - all strict, 'no nonsense' kind of!
Although nervous and feeling awkward about this meeting, Shashank chooses to put on the mask of his strictness and anger in front of Juhi. Strictness, because he is the boss of Sanjivani. Angry, just to prove Juhi that he is not any teenage lover of hers who would run after her just to convince her to not get angry on him.
"Apke vitals check karne hain.",
she says, whilst walking towards his desk. She places the files she had been carrying, on his desk and makes it a reason to lower her eyes as the way Shashank is staring her - she doesn't understand why is making her heart to skip a beat. The keeping of the files on the desk becomes a reason to escape from that weird feeling. Only that she doesn't have the guts to confess even to herself that this awkwardness is nothing but - sexual tension!
Shashank keeping his angry and strict look on, stares her throughout - a means to show Juhi that he isn't feeling guilty about anything - no! not at all!
"Surgery ke liye apka medically fit hona zaruri hai.",
she says entwining her fingers together.
Saying so Juhi finally looks towards him, standing on the other side of his desk and his staring her constantly skips her heartbeat. No, not that she wasn't aware of his staring her while she was putting the file on the desk, but as soon as she meets his eyes she manages to read something she hadn't read before, that makes her heart to skip a beat.
Shashank stares her constantly, not missing any of her gesture.
Accept it Juhi, it isn't that you didn't read his eyes earlier - the very moment you both looked at each other when you reached Sanjivani after such a long gap, but you took it as the happiness of a mentor on seeing his protegee after such a long time rather than anything else!
"To shuru karein?",
saying so Juhi picks up the torch and walks across the table to reach Shashank.
Shashank finally blinks his eyes but doesn't yet stops staring her.
Her formal tone irritates him. She is not his Juhi! Where has that comfort level gone? Why is she adamant at dissolving the comfort level between them and turning it all professional and awkward?
When he doesn't let go off his staring her, Juhi who now starts getting all the more uncomfortable as a result of his constant stare chooses to focus on her duty as Shashank's doctor.
As she walks across his desk to reach his side, never looking towards him - acting all professional, Shashank following her through his eyes, asks in a bit strict tone, as if he doesn't care much about her reaction, yet asking her. His tone strict mingled with a little nervousness which he feels he is managing to hide from her pretty well.
"Itni formal kyun ho? Gusse mein ho abhi tak?",
asks Shashank whilst Juhi walks to him, his eyes following her, his tone strict mingled with a little nervousness which he feels he is managing to hide from her pretty well.
But alas! he is mistaken for thinking so!
He swivels his chair a little, as Juhi reaches his side, just to focus on her properly.
Juhi doesn't reply, wanting him to stay in dilemma, but at the same time wanting him to understand that yes - she is angry on him! And she continues with her work.
Reaching his side, she keeps the blood pressure measuring instrument on the table. Keeping her eyes and focus on the instrument, she opens it preparing to measure his blood pressure. On receiving such reaction from her - almost like no reaction from her side, Shashank turns his demeanour all the more strict, and stares her head to toe - out of anger - almost a fake one! He obliges by forwarding his arm so that she can wrap the thing around his upper arm - his biscep and measure his blood pressure, never ending the strict stare of his - he adjusts it on his upperarm and Juhi adjusting her stethoscope begins with the process of measuring his blood pressure.
Shashank stares her, in all angry and strict manner - indicating how unconcerned he is even if she is angry upon him. Wanting her to know that if she can get angry on him - he too can get angry on her.
None of Shashank's reaction goes unnoticed by Juhi. None of his reaction goes unaffected on Juhi. But she somehow manages to keep her nerves under control in front of him.Shashank finally looks away and takes a deep breath - only then he realizes that he had been holding his breath! And it was an affect of Juhi's beauty and her presence in the cabin - all alone with. It is creating a havoc for Shashank.
Keeping his look on, staring Juhi constantly, while Juhi - never meeting his eyes - focuses on wraping the material around his upper arm to measure his blood pressure.
Shashank although staying angry and strict, helps her in the process. His anger rises a wee bit when she doesn't for once looks towards him.
Juhi brings out her stethoscope from the pocket of her jacket.
"Apni saansein normal rakhiye Sir!",
as Juhi orders her whilst measuring his blood pressure he realizes that his rate of heartbeat needs to be kept under control and he needs to breath normal!
And oh! how can he tell her that she is the culprit! It is she because of whom his rate of breathing is accelerating and is in no way getting under his control.
"Blood pressure normal hai.",
saying so she removes the wrap from around his arm, Shashank helps her with it.As she keeps the additionals back into the instrument machine, Shashank stares her to read her mood. Has she turned normal and cool for him even a wee bit. But to his dismay she seems to be not at all in mood to talk to him normally.
"Eye test kar lete hain.",
saying so she walks forth, picking up her torch she walks back to his side. Shashank, who is sitting on his seat, resting his elbows at his desk such that his arms are standing erect and the back of his hands are resting on his lips, waits for her to carry on with her duty.
As she walks back to him, Shashank swivels his chair to his right - towards Juhi - where she has reached now to test his eyes.
He stares up at her.
Juhi slowly rests her left hand on his eyes, opening it wide in order to test it, using the torch. Shashank stares right into her eyes, reading her, wanting to stare her and read her a little more. How hard might he try he fails to avoid her beauty. This closeness, he doesn't understand why affects him deeply!
He wants to talk to her. He wants to say something.... anything to her, just a reason to begin a conversation with her. He stares her and finally breaks the ice by saying his favourite word - addressing her by her name, to gain her attention - as if it were somewhere else otherwise!
"Juhi!"
He waits for her to react to his addressing her. Only then will he be able to gain confidence to continue with this conversation.
His merely addressing her, sends shiver running down her spine.
It feels to her as if for the first time she has heard him addressing her directly.
Today when he calls her by her name, she doesn't understand why her breath hitches and she feels as if he has addressed her directly for the first time. She doesn't fail to feel the possessiveness in his address. The feeling of which clenches her heart and accelerates her rate of heartbeat. In this enclosed room she doesn't know why his addressing her makes it sound so - intimate to her!
She feels an urgency to get away from him, as if she doubts if she stays close to him for longer period she might end up doing something with him which she might regret later. This closeness, his perfume is so hypnotising.
She lowers the flashlight, keeping her eyes lowered out of hesitation. Her each nerve ending raised. She waits for him to continue.
"Mujhe laga tha tum wapas nahi aogi aaj subah.",
he says, honestly.
That skips Juhi's heartbeat. Her face goes stiff, fathoming his words. She chooses to make him learn that she hasn't returned for him.
Turning, walking away, she says,
"Contract sign kiya hai!"
"Sanjivani mein tab tak rahungi, jab tak aap firse nahi nikal detein.",
she says, picking up the blood pressure measuring instrument and finally looking towards him.
Shashank whilst listening to her, rubs his eyes adjusting his eyes back to the normal light from the bright light of the torch.
Shashank finally manages to look towards her. His expression to her words tells Juhi how she has managed to make him feel guilty, all over again.
Shashank lowers his eyes a little, after looking towards her. A gesture of guilt and also because he knows he would never do that again! In fact this time he would make sure that even if she herself would want to leave Sanjivani again, he would grab her by her wrist, pulling her back to him and warn her if situation asks for - that she dare not even think of leaving Sanjivani again; leaving him again!
She then walks in front of his desk such that they are at the opposite ends of the desk. Keeping her hands locked in front of her, looking straight towards him - all serious and professional, Juhi says,
"Tremors aur memory function test karna hai. Khade ho jaiye.",
she gestures him to stand up.
Shashank, tilting his head towards his left, never taking eyes away from her, tries to think what else can he say to convince her. Also his expression is a means of showing his anger to Juhi for being so adamant at not understanding what he hasn't said in many words! With his right brow arched and his sharp look intact on her, he stares her. He blinks his eyes and stretches his lips, helplessly, realizing that he is losing this opportunity.
Juhi, standing in front of him, lowers her eyes, as his that possessive and angry look affect her. Only by lowering her eyes, escaping the stare will she be able to calm down her nerves and the feelings that are pushing the walls of her heart to get proper entry into her heart and she adamantly is refusing their entry.
Not that Dr. Shashank as her mentor hasn't given her that angry look ever, but somehow today, after such a long gap when they are meeting again; when their relationship is messed up at the moment, this stare is affecting her way too much. She is scared that if she continues staring him she might end up reading him to the core, and which might eventually lead to what she doesn't want it to lead towards; something she isn't prepared for.... yet!
Lowering her eyes for fraction of second, Juhi takes a deep breath, calming herself down. She understands that in no time she might go weak in front of Shashank, she understands he has that potential to make her go weak on her knees by that one stare of his but she is not ready to accept the same, not at least in front of him!
Shashank doesn't help her a wee bit by lowering his eyes, instead he keeps staring her, reading her; indicating her through his strict look that she is being tough on him.
"Karlein please?",
she requests, in all professional tone, looking towards him, bowing her head a little.
Staring him for some moments and realizing that he is not reacting, Juhi without waiting for his reaction walks to her left - a gesture that she is not here to discuss or react to their personal issues.
Helplessly, Shashank never looking away from her, swivels his chair towards the side Juhi is walking towards, scowling at her and at his situation too, and getting up he walks forwards and stands in front of Juhi stretching his both arms in front of her. His look still the same as if he is an angry child who has been ordered not to have his own chocolate.
Juhi, standing in front of him, holding her right wrist with her left hand, she examins Shashank's hands and whilst doing so she asks him, never taking her eyes away from his hands, not wanting to escape any tremor - if found.
Looking towards him, she asks him, in strict doctor mode,
"Lunch mein kya khaya apne?"
"Roti, aaloo matar ki sabzi, dal.",
replies Shashank, in strict patient mode, never taking his eyes away from her.
"Dinner mein?",
asks Juhi, looking towards him.
"Bakwas tha.",
replies Shashank, staring her constantly.
He understands that his words would pinch her and remind her of the last night's encounter and argument at her home with Anjali and himself. But this is the only way to make her talk about whatever happened last night.
And that surely skips Juhi's heartbeat. She goes silent for brief moment, staring him constantly. Shashank doesn't fail to stare her back, provoking her to say something about last night so that he understands what is going on in her mind.
"No tremors.",
says Juhi, her voice lower than before - result of his reply.
Shashank staring Juhi throughout lowers his arms and nods his head slowly into positive, whilst shoving his hands into his trousers' pockets.
"Dekho Juhi...",
he finally begins with explaining himself, ever so calmly.
"Jo maine kia wo galat tha!",
he says looking towards her tilting his head towards his right.
"Lekin...",
and before he could continue with this, Juhi intervenes,
"Body ki co-ordination check karein?"
Shashank goes numb out of surprise, how can she react so coolly? Why is she not shouting at him? Is she not angry? No! He is sure about at least one thing that she is angry on him. But he understands this too that she doesn't want to discuss this, and accepting her decision of not wanting to have this discussion, Shashank drops the topic right there for the time being.
Juhi then never taking her eyes away from him, walks forward towards him. Shashank stands stick to his place, completely at her mercy. He could feel all of his energy that he had collected to talk to her going in vain.
Standing closer to him a little less than an arms length, Juhi slowly stretches her arms, placing them parallel to his arms, careful not touching him by anymeans.
Her merely doing this, increases Shashank's anxiety, but he keeps it under his control fairly well. For that brief moment he doesn't understand why Shashank over takes Dr. Shashank in him.
Knowing what he has to do, Shashank chooses to add into it what his heart asks him to do - which otherwise isn't mandatory for a patient to do in order to give this test - he closes his eyes slowly and starts walking towards Juhi.
The sudden closing of his eyes and walking towards herself blindly, skips Juhi's heartbeat as his this gesture conveys to Juhi his blind faith in her. That whatever might be the situation, if Juhi is with him, to support him, he doesn't have to fear for his life. He knows she would save him from getting hurt whatever might it ask from her in doing so!
She cannot for once take her eyes away from him, completely stunned by his deep faith in her. She for the first time is seeing this side of Shashank. She after what feels like ages is feeling this feeling - that someone can trust her with his life - someone other than her regular patients. This in front of her isn't just her regular patient! He is more... way more to her!!! This she realizes by witnessing his immense faith in her. Stunned and mesmerized, she fails to take her eyes off him.
She doesn't understand when her eyes turn teary. Only if she could be bold enough to do what her heart is desiring for at this moment, then it would have been a completely different situation between them today but all she could do at this moment is enjoy witnessing this beautiful man in front of her who trusts her; who doesn't judge her for anything; who... who loves her!
As he reaches all the more closer to her, Juhi holds him from both of his upper arms, staring him with immense surprise and deep respect and a lot more - a feeling which she is scared to give a name to. This she does, not out of fear of this man that what might he do to her if not stopped at this moment itself by her; but rather fearing herself, her feelings that are developing for him in her heart. She is scared of what might she end up doing on receiving such immense trust and faith of someone. Of.... Shashank's!
Her sudden touch makes Shashank to stop in his process of walking ahead and towards her and makes him to open his eyes, his demeanour all calm and composed as if this closeness of theirs - of Juhi and Shashank's didn't affect him a wee bit! But in fact only he knows how much is it taking him to keep his nerves under control at this moment when Juhi is just one step away from him.
He notices how Juhi is stunned to the core but what he fails to understand is what is her shock about? What has he done to shock her? As for him whatever he just did is nothing out of box it is rather a normal thing for him to do when he knows that standing in front of him is none other than his Juhi - someone on whom his trust comes naturally without much effort.
"Aap surgery karne ke liye fit hain!"
"Juhi!"
"Kya hum baith kar baat kar sakte hain please?"
.... to be continued
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