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Hey peeps!
Long time..😆
So this is different from what i've written before...
I hope u guyz lyk it😃
I shall continue with my Romance Series soon😃
Do read and comment!😃
Scroll Down For Index😃---/----/-----/----/----/----/----/----/-----/---
Mei Yeh ab aur nahi sehsakti... talaaq ke naam se meri rooh kaapne lagti hai... aaj tum mujhe teesra talaaq doge.. par mei hamare rishte ko kyun toot ta nahi dekhsakti.. aur na tumhe mujhe talaaq dene se rok sakti hoon... hamara rishta aise khatam nahi hosakta... ek dib aayega jab tumhe puri sachai pata chalegi..par tab bahut der hojaayegi...kyunki jab mei tumhare paas nahi rahungi... zain tum meri pehli aur aakhri mohabbat ho..tumhare siva mei kise aur ke baare mei soch bhi nahi sakti... mujhe tumse alag hone se khauf aata hai... mei nahi jaanti ki yeh hamare saath kyun huwa?? Hum toh ek doosre se beintehaa mohabbat karte the nuh?? Phir yeh beintehaa nafrat kyun?? Kyun tum mujhse itni door chale gayye?? Mei jaanti hoon yeh khat(letter) padhke tumhe gussa aayega.. mei jaanti hoon mere jaane se tumhe koi farak nahi padhta... par hamare talaaq ko rokne ka aur koi tareeka nahi hai zain... mei dua karungi ki tum jahaan raho khush raho... mei tumhe apne siva kisi aur ke saath tassavur(imagine) bhi nahi karsakti..par dua karti hoon ki tum jisse nikaah karoge woh tum khush rakhegi... ek baat hamesha yaad rakhna zain..yeh maamu ki bhanji sirf mamu ke bete ki hai.. aur isse uska yeh haq koi nahi cheen sakta..tum bhi nahi...apna khayal rakhna.. i luv u Zain
Tumhari..aur sirf tumhari
Aaliya...!
I left the note on the sidetable... n saw him for the last time.. he luked lyk a baby while sleeping..i imagined myself sleeping beside him... in his arms..in the crook of his neck with his hand wrapped tightly arnd my waist... i imagined him kissing me passionately...his touch..his hands all over my body... i would never be able to feel him..his touch... his skin ever again.. i will never hear "mallika-e-zain" or "mamu ki bhanji"... i will never be kissed gudnyt by him.. he would never remove the blanket from my face ever again..he would never offer me a glass of water when i choked while reading quran...he would never drink ganne k juice with me.. he would never remove his blazer n make me wear it whn i felt cold... he would never come hug me from behind while i was working in the kitchen.. he would never tell "i love u aaliya"..their was a lump in my throat and a lone tear scrolled down my cheek... how i wish i could just get into the bed with him n make him forget everythng..how will i ever be able to prove my innocence to him?? How will i ever forget him??how will i ever forget those wonderful moments spent with him?? How will i ever be able to move in my life without him?? How will i ever love again??all these thoughts were creating a havoc in my mind..i didnt want that lump in my throat to turn into loud sobs..i went near him..covered him fully with "our" blanket... n kissed him goodbye on his forhead... "i love u zain" with that i quietly left his room... he would come to knw that i had come to his roob tomorrow..he will be angry but i wanted to c him one last time...i captured that sight of his in my phone... n quietly left Barkat Villa...
Back in my hotel room.. i packed all my stuff..all my clothes n all those gifts by zain...my eyes were burning red due to tears... my head spinning... i hadnt eaten anything since the morning...
Main tenu samjhawan ki
Na tere bina lagda jee
Main tenu samjhawan ki
Na tere bina lagda jee
Tu ki jaane pyaar mera
Main karoon intezar tera
Tu dil tui-yon jaan meri
Jaan meri, jaan meri...
I took the photo frame from the sidetable... our second nikaah pic.. we got married again as Abdul and saira...all those moments came running into my memory..how we had done everything to find his lost sister Barkat... the golden pair of earings were lying on the other side of the table.. that was the first gift ever..i still remember his hesitation while giving it to me n also whn i moved forward to hug me...i smiled amidst crying remembering all those moments... "mei kaise samjhoun isse ki mei begunaah hoon??"
Mere dil ne chun laiyaa ne
Tere dil diyaan raahan
Mere dil ne chun laiyaa ne
Tere dil diyaan raahan
Tu jo mere naal tu rehta
Turpe meriyaan saaha
I moved towards my clothes... i took the yellow anarkali in my hand n hugged it... this is was outfit i wore whn we first confessed our feelings... the first ever I love You..i still remember the fear in his eyes... the fear that he had lost me forever...that relief in his eyes whn he saw me running towards him..his joy.. his happiness whn i told him that i love him... i had fresh tears again in my eyes...
I gave it one last glance...n kept it lovingly in my trunk... yes that "bhopali trunk" which zain had hidden it in the washroom after our nikaah...that trunk which made him realize that i was still there on the railway station.. "Ya Allah" n my tears turned into loud sobs..i couldnt take it anymore...the separation .. the hate was killing me every second...
Jeena mera.. hoye
Hun hai tera, ki main karaan
Tu kar aitbaar mera
Main karoon intezar tera
Tu dil tui-yon jaan meri
Jaan meri, jaan meri
Main tenu samjhawan ki
Na tere bina lagda jee
I took the another anarkali.. the one which i wore on our first date...the bluish green anarkali... all those moments whn he made me eat gol gappe.. sheer khorma.. n made me drink that ganne ka juice .. i remember him taking my hand in his n walking along the beach ... i remembered all his "compliments".. i laughed amidst the tears..."pagal" ...i smiled n kept it in the trunk... thn i took the pink saari which i had worn whn we had our first kiss... whn we consummated our wedding...i could feel his hands all over my body again.. yes i was yearning for his touch... his love.. his smile.. HIM... i needed him by my side... i kept that saari aside n thn took the white saari which i had worn on the valentines day..i still remember how he closed the hook of my blouse n saved me from embarassement even when he hated me... nostalgia hit me hard... i simply dumped all those clothes in my trunk not able to take the pain anymore..i had been living in this hotel room since 2 months ... n now i didnt knw where i was gng .. i just knew that i had to get out of here to stop the talaq..maybe he'll come to knw abt my innocence n thn ask ne to return to him?? Will i ever be able to forget everythng n get back to him?? Will he ever understand me??will i ever be able to make him understand how much i love him??
"Mei kaise samjhoun tumhe ki mei nahi reh sakti tumhare bina"... my tears had dried again... i held the trunk in my left hand n hugged our nikaah pic close to my heart n finally left Mumbai not knwing where i'll go...
Ve changa nahi o keeta beeba
Ve changa nahi o keeta beeba
Dil mera tod ke
Ve bada pachtaiyaan akhaan
Ve bada pachtaiyaan akhaan
Naal tere jod ke
It had been 6 years now n Zain Abdullah never called or showed up anytime..all those 6 years i had my eyes focused on the main door and on the phone hoping that maybe ..maybe he'd call.. but ...
"Ammi...abu kab aayegein?" Asked my 5 yr old son Zayed... yes i had giveb birth to our baby...i named him Zayed Zain Abdullah..he was exactly like his abu... he had those same eyes ..nose lips n everythng..he was as irritating as his father...i smiled at him n brushed his hair with my fingers...
"Baccha.. woh aayegein..zarur aayegein".. i faked a smile...
"Ammi aap hamesha aisa hi kehti hai... school mei sab ke abu aake unhe pick karte hai ..sirf mere abu nahi aate".. he ran away crying...i sat there numb not knwing wht to do... he was a kid afterall...i should have informed zain about my pregnancy but i wanted him to make the first move..i sat there numb not kwning what to do...how will i make zayed understand that his abu wont be coming?how will he react?will he be angry??
"Ya Allah...mei isse kaise samjahoun ke iske abu"... i couldnt complete that sentence as i had a lump in my throat ... i went inside my room n opened the drawer... i took out the photoframe which i had taken from his room ... i pressed it hard against my chest... i sat down n tears started flowing out of my eyes...i couldnt tke it anymore..i felt helpless..my husband couldnt understand me n now my son wont be able to ubderstand me...
"MAIN TENU SAMJAHAVA KI..."...
I slept on the floor ..crying..holding that frame close to my chest...
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