Debate: Arrange Marriage Vs Love Mariage - Page 2

For me, i think ppl falling in love, getting married n living happily are the most fortunate ppl in the world.
Not everyone has the luck to marry the person whom he or she loves.

But as some mentioned, u hv to be sure tht it is true love b4 going on with the r/shp. it maybe only infatuation n many ppl just wanna play safe n marry a friend whom they know for a long time, mistakenly thinking tht it might develop into love.. They are the unluckiest n sometimes, they dun even know it!
The r/ship might not work out, n u might lose a gd friend in the process..

Love marriage is fine only if the couple trusts each other completely. Trust is the foundation of any relationship..

Abt arranged marriages.. i always found it absurd tht how 2 strangers can live together for the rest of their life but hopefully they are aware of wht they are doing.. I don't think so personally i can ever settle for an arranged marriage.

So for me, Love marriage takes the lead !

Edited by glamourous - 17 years ago

Like many said. there isnt one type of marriage that is better. there are a few things that make each of them a good one or a bad one.

Ok for arranged marriages. The bad points are that your family picks the guys or the girls and then you decide who you want to marry( most of the time). Even though you mite feel like you didnt have a chance to look beyond the boundaries for someone of maybe a different background or something. but the key fact is that you do actually marry the person's family and not just them. well, atleast thats what you do in Indian marriages. so its very important to see all this other factors like family and background.

For love marriages. It is often seen that love marriages dont really last that long and maybe a reason for that is that the couples end up marrying too early in their lives. It is important to grow up together with the partner. dont get married when youre still trying to find your own identity. if you know who you are then it becomes easier to know if that person is right for you. and after that one should try to form their identity as a couple. its important to get the facts right before marriage. like how many children to have, where to live, whether or not to work. if these decisions are not made then it becomes a mess after the couples actually grow up but as different individuals.

thats what i think. in my opinion, arranged marriages seem more simpler and more dependable

rani

I think love marriages are far better than arranged marriages. These days arranged marriages are going for a toss, in which cases are on rapid rise in indian families when wife harasses, tortures and humiliates her husband and other family members. It's a fact in today's India, when the family dispute takes a different turn, and all family members go to jail when wife/ bahu put false and baseless allegations against husband and tell blunt lies. But others sympathies and trust her as a 'Abla Nari', so support her, which she misuses for her hidden selfish ends. There are numerous such cases which are ever increasing in Indian families that are living in India and abroad. More information on sites. More information on sites: http://reportmaritalproblems.blogspot.com, www.saveindianfamily.org, www.mynation.net

Originally posted by: nkumar48

I think love marriages are far better than arranged marriages. These days arranged marriages are going for a toss, in which cases are on rapid rise in indian families when wife harasses, tortures and humiliates her husband and other family members. It's a fact in today's India, when the family dispute takes a different turn, and all family members go to jail when wife/ bahu put false and baseless allegations against husband and tell blunt lies. But others sympathies and trust her as a 'Abla Nari', so support her, which she misuses for her hidden selfish ends. There are numerous such cases which are ever increasing in Indian families that are living in India and abroad. More information on sites. More information on sites: http://reportmaritalproblems.blogspot.com, www.saveindianfamily.org, www.mynation.net

plz dun generalise...coz the few that do do that for their own selfish means ruin it for other actually battrd and abused women.

i think its more important to understand what love is....then only we can say love marraige is better or the arranged.Mostly people get attracted to each other and marry after couple of months.These are kind of marraiges that break.I think if its true love then it cant fail regardless of couple getting married or not getting married.In my opinion arranged marraiged with consent of boy and girl is the best option in the oriental society as compared to the european society where they have different view about life

great topic and KANK movie of karan johar explores this avenue. to me it all matters on who are the people in the realationship, there understanding of each other and so on...and so whether its luv or arranged these are key aspects..and in todays society things are not the same..

In the past, arranged was great, since people would adjust nowadays people are more modern and not easily adjust so whether is luv or arranged is the issue its understanding ur partnen, supporting and luving them which is hre key.

Angela/Pari

well in my point of view ....i think love marriage is better ...cuz u know the person well and ur marriage will be successful ...but i dont mean to say tht if its an arrange marriage it wont be successful ...it will be ...but its gonna take time that the two persons know each other well n all ...thats all so according to me...love marriage is the best! 😳 x

i think they're both okay if the people getting married are happy with each other but since i've mostly seen arranged marriages in my family and they've worked, i would prefer arranged marriages. love marriages as long as they work are fine too.

i think that u shud never go too far with any thing love marriage or an arrange marriage. There are people who get married to the wrong person because they thought they were in love and they threw all caution and reason to the wind, then there r those who get married to someone they didnt want to cause their parents forced them. so wat u have u to do is find a balance, find someone who U can spend ur life with and find someone who ur parents can handle as well. This is just a very odd example but if u were in love with a stripper try to understand that ur parents wont be able to handle that(i am generalizing here but there might be those who can handle it), the same way ur parents have to understand that if u graduated from harvard u cant marry a "gaoon ki ladki". U just have to find the middle ground, where love and arrange meet and love in harmony 😳

I just submitted a paper on this for my Anthropology class.😆

I believe they both are two different cases and cannot be compared so easily. In some situations love marriages are better; in the other arrange marriages are. They both are defined by the atmosphere and situation surrounding each party.

The reason love marriages are sometimes not approved by the adults or parents of a house hold is because they either do not trust the person or they do not think he is worthy of their child. The first thing they do is look at his backround and his family's respect in society. Then they look at what his career is and if he can easily support a family or not. If these all come out to be good then there would usually be no reason for the parents to let their child marry someone they love and care for.

However on the other hand, if the boy does not have a strong career, comes from a respected family, and does not seem trustworthy they would obviously oppose the marriage by saying you cannot live life on a base of love because love does not give you the wealth or money to raise a family.

Arrange marriages are is another way of marriage. Most of the time, the child trust their parents' judgement regarding who would be the right person based on if they can support a family, and is a respected person in society. By the marriage being arranged doesn't mean that the two people whom are to be wed do not have a say regarding their feelings towards the person. Commonly if the boy refuses to wed a girl he would not be forced to marry her. So in a way he chooses who he wants to wed from an array of girls in a pool who are also looking to be wed.

Arrange marriages are not as bad as they are commonly thought throughout the world. The people to be wed do have a big say about what they think about the other person so it cannot be said arrange marriages are marriages against ones will or a violation to ones freedom because they are not forced upon to marry someone but rather suggested.

Both types do seem to bring happiness and sadness so neither can be superior than the other. Sometimes in love marriages the couple didn't know each other as well as they thought they did and it ends up in divorce. Sometimes in arrange marriages people get stuck with the total opposites without knowing it during the time of getting married. Yes there are of course happiness in both as well.

They both equal out which makes neither superior to the other.

Regards,

~Khizer