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toothbrush13 thumbnail
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Posted: 5 years ago

Originally posted by: AreYaar

Thanks for providing these written updates, TB.....I haven't managed to bring myself to watch these IVs of Ankita yet....it all just feels too surreal.

But I must say, Ankita has surprised me....I'm not sure how prudent it is for her to say and do all this now....it takes immense emotional strength and a clean conscience to do what she is doing in talking her heart out about Sushant again....I didn't think such things could happen outside of fiction....after all that had passed between them and everyone having moved on, she still has this earnest love and respect for him that she wants to stand for.

After everything, all Ankita wants is for the world to know him as she did....it's almost as if his death has given her a newfound resolve to not let his memory be tarnished. What a remarkable love this is indeed....she is still able to love him without expectations. Yes, she's moved on in life now but this clearly is a love not bound by time or circumstances....she will always love him in her own way even as life moves on.

I didn't think I would be watching any of these... and then I clicked on the Times Now one out of some kind of compulsion and I don't regret it. I haven't seen anyone quoting or reporting on the parts that felt so special to me. And I don't know... somewhere I felt like, if she can put herself out there like this then the least I can do is listen to what she has to say. I'm glad I did. I want to work my way through the rest of the videos too, but so far everything I have heard has brought me an odd sense of closure.

I think it's clear for everyone to see that since March 2016 I have been struggling with this topic. I had buried it fairly well but his passing brought it all back out. I couldn't stop questioning what was real and what was my rose-colored khayali pulao. Every time I said I was doing better with it I wasn't lying, it was slow and steady progress, but I still wasn't fully there. But now hearing in her voice, in her own words her thoughts and feelings and memories, and having them match the feelings I held so close... I don't know how to describe it. I never, ever expected an "answer" from either of them. But now I inadvertently got the answer to what was bothering me for years at this point... it was real. It was all real and they were absolutely special together and as individuals.

I know I always go in circles, but right now I truly feel like I can move forward with all of the good memories and a clear conscience that I wasn't insane. I had already come to terms with the fact that he had chosen a path that I didn't agree with, and that this decision didn't take away from better memories, regardless of how I felt about him the past few years. So to hear directly from her about the version of Sushant she wants to memorialize and cherish, it just brings it all together for me. I know this isn't her purpose behind these interviews and that I always take everything about them too personally, but right now she is literally giving me validation and closure on a plate and I am going to take it.

The love and sincerity in her voice and on her face... if you end up watching some of these videos you'll see how when she launches into one of her stories about him her face just glows. There's no awkwardness or pretense or concentrated thought. If I watched this in a movie I would have rolled my eyes. Nobody can care about or love or respect a person so much, and especially not a person who may have hurt them deeply... but here we are. It seems like she has accepted that even if things didn't turn out how she dreamed, he and everything about him will always be a part of her heart, and I have so much respect for the emotional strength that must require.

Edit: On re-reading, this post comes across as extremely, overly emotional. Don't be concerned I just express myself kinda dramatically lol

Edited by toothbrush13 - 5 years ago
majoni03 thumbnail
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Posted: 5 years ago

Prarthana's interview.. like Ankita she is also talking about the old Sushant we all loved

https://youtu.be/FrsBwn3_iKo

Afss_94 thumbnail
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Posted: 5 years ago

Hello guys! So what made me to come back again is Anki's interview. I need to catch up all of your posts. I will definitely go through them after I put my thoughts here.

So once again Anki made me proud with her boldness and passion. She was talking so passionately regarding SSR really made me emotional and at the same time I was drawn back to 2010 days. Haila!! I can say no one knows sush better than anki even after 4 years of break up. This girl is way much courageous and not fake. She has a new relationship and no one was looking for her to come out and stand for Sush. But she came and stood. She could make her aloof from all these and live a secure life with new partner. But she hasn’t changed see.... She is still the same Ankita whom we knew on 2010.

If you watch all her IVs I think now all of you are clear regarding thier break up. She said in times now that sushant used to tell her she should join films. But she wasn’t interested at all rather she wanted to get married. So this is clear where the conflict began. Sushant's pr insisted him to break up with anki because she has no future in BW and will not be able to do anything for his career.

Just one thing still haunting me is what makes sushant to believe these prs and leave ankita!! He lost the game in 2016 not on 14th june 2020.

Regarding the murder mystery angle, thorough investigation is needed. Specially Siddharth pithani, cooks, rhea, samual I mean all the insiders need thorough interrogation. Why siddharth pithani left Arnab's show in the middle? Why sandip singh was stammering at arnab's questions? Why the cook gave 20 minutes public interview to a news channel? And in his statement there were no locksmith angle. Why Siddharth pithani (insta name buddha pithani) posted a pic with caption "absence of photon" on 11th June? What does that mean? Photon is a scientific term and Sushant's insta handle had bio "photon in double slit". That means Sushant considered himself as Photon. So is there any link of Siddharth's Instagram post with Sushant's demise? All these questions need answers.

Hope Sush will get justice. I know he will never be back.. But atleast his soul will rest in peace.

Edited by Afss_94 - 5 years ago
AreYaar thumbnail
Posted: 5 years ago

Originally posted by: toothbrush13


The love and sincerity in her voice and on her face... if you end up watching some of these videos you'll see how when she launches into one of her stories about him her face just glows. There's no awkwardness or pretense or concentrated thought. If I watched this in a movie I would have rolled my eyes. Nobody can care about or love or respect a person so much, and especially not a person who may have hurt them deeply... but here we are. It seems like she has accepted that even if things didn't turn out how she dreamed, he and everything about him will always be a part of her heart, and I have so much respect for the emotional strength that must require.

Edit: On re-reading, this post comes across as extremely, overly emotional. Don't be concerned I just express myself kinda dramatically lol


@bold: I did end up watching one of the IVs....the Times Now one....and I was struck by this exactly....her face just glows with conviction when she talks about Sushant....only a totally clear heart can talk with that kind of conviction....there's a different light in her eyes, and a different kind of smile as she reminisces about Sushant. Only a heart that has truly loved him can talk about him like that even after having a messy breakup.


LOL oh please don't be concerned about coming across as overly emotional....especially about this. All of this has been so unprecedented and so surreal, we are all allowed to get overly emotional.


The few other things that stood out to me in the IV....a) Ankita saying main kisi se nahin darti😆 - such an Ankita thing to say. LOL.....and b) Her expression whenever she would speak about his family and the pain they are in. You rightly mentioned that she has such an expressive face that the emotions just play out when she's speaking from her heart....you can feel her love for his family too when she talks about the pain they are in and how they are in no condition to play the games some people are accusing them of.


I could understand why she spoke up now.....she's one of those people who loves fiercely in life....and she loved both Sushant and his family like that. In Sushant's case, him having left her made her move on in life....but with his family, the bond remained and seeing them in so much pain is now bringing out her mama bear mode in wanting to protect them, stand with them.


It's also remarkable - the candidness, the honesty with which she admitted why she couldn't go to his funeral....because she wouldn't have been able to live the rest of her life after having seen him in that state. Such an honest admission when she could have given some diplomatic, evasive answer. And the starkness in this admission about how hard it is to see the dead body of someone you love....while knowing you still have to continue to live, so you have to strengthen yourself enough to face the rest of your life ahead.


The thing that stands out the most is the fact that Ankita doesn't even need to say how deeply she loved him....it's so apparent without her saying it directly....the way she talks about him, all his dreams, his spirit, as if she's lived it all with him as one (which she did, in many ways)....the fact that she can admit she wouldn't have been able to live after seeing him in that state says as much too. It may sound filmy but frankly we seem to be past the point of the lines blurring between fiction and reality now....lol there might as well be the PR title song and "Saathiya tune kya kiya" playing in the bg for this IV. Ankita may just manage to outdo Archana also. Who would've thought. lol

toothbrush13 thumbnail
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Posted: 5 years ago

Originally posted by: Afss_94

If you watch all her IVs I think now all of you are clear regarding thier break up. She said in times now that sushant used to tell her she should join films. But she wasn’t interested at all rather she wanted to get married. So this is clear where the conflict began. Sushant's pr insisted him to break up with anki because she has no future in BW and will not be able to do anything for his career.

I forgot to bring this up before but that part made me really sad, when she said she was lazy and then corrected herself to say she was just happy with her life and wanted to get married. It's like by default she still thinks of herself in the terms he used to use to describe her, and has to actively talk herself out of it. I remember at one point Sushant started mentioning more frequently that she sleeps too much and doesn't do anything with her time, and a couple pages back I posted the insta story from Nayandeep where you can see he was literally calling her lazy in front of other people too. His words (and actions thereafter) really took a toll on her... I know there is no rewind button, but how I wish she had been extended the same support she so willingly gave.

Guggu_Minty thumbnail
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Posted: 5 years ago

TB, You write beautifully. Whatever I could not express you have said it so perfectly. Even though I said I need a break, I could not keep myself away and watched Ankita’s interviews. She talks with so much passion and love for him. My heart 💔 Why things have to turn out like this 😔


Regarding whatever is happening in Mumbai. I feel so ashamed being from this city. The files deleted, IPS officer forced to quarantine. So much of corruption. Horrible.

It’s sad to imagine what the family must be going through because of this circus and the theories.

Afss_94 thumbnail
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Posted: 5 years ago

Originally posted by: toothbrush13

I forgot to bring this up before but that part made me really sad, when she said she was lazy and then corrected herself to say she was just happy with her life and wanted to get married. It's like by default she still thinks of herself in the terms he used to use to describe her, and has to actively talk herself out of it. I remember at one point Sushant started mentioning more frequently that she sleeps too much and doesn't do anything with her time, and a couple pages back I posted the insta story from Nayandeep where you can see he was literally calling her lazy in front of other people too. His words (and actions thereafter) really took a toll on her... I know there is no rewind button, but how I wish she had been extended the same support she so willingly gave.



You just spoke exactly what I felt when she corrected herself. Also these news were leaked in the media that time. There are many articles I can still find out where exactly these lines were written. So yes hearing the same from Ankita really hurts. I don’t know how a subtle mind like sushant digested those bullshit pr strategies!! I mean how is it possible?

priya185 thumbnail
Posted: 5 years ago

https://everythingabouteducation.net/2020/08/02/barkha-sushant-is-not-the-opportunity-to-spread-awareness-about-mental-health-i-explain-why/

Sushant's brother in law writes a blog


Barkha, Sushant is NOT the opportunity to spread awareness about mental health! I explain why.AUGUST 2, 2020 / VISHALKIRTI

Disclaimer: I am not making any criminal allegations and I am NOT talking on behalf of Sushant Singh Rajput’s father (my father in law). This is an independent opinion and is a response to what was presented by Barkha Dutt (allegedly an audio recording of Susan Walker Moffat, who is alleged to be Sushant’s psychotherapist).

I have been watching everything from the sidelines and analyzing the discussions happening around my brother-in-law’s death.

sush2

Sushant and I in 2014. I saw him last in person in July 2017 on my trip to India.

Sushant and I had a very healthy relationship and most of our conversations were around books and movies. I have known him since 1997 (my 8th grade) since his sister Shweta (my wife now), he and I went to the same school. Shweta and I were in the same grade and he was a grade junior. Whether you believe it or not, he was charming but shy and was known more popularly as Shweta’s little brother amongst my batchmates. Shweta and I had a little bit of chemistry and some batchmates teased us as “Jija-Saala” when we sat together on the school bus. That eventually was proven true in 2007 (thanks to the amazing coincidence that I went to IIT Madras for my undergrad and my wife went to NIFT Madras for hers, which gave us the opportunity to stay in touch and we eventually tied the knot in 2007). I had moved to the US in 2006 but stayed in touch with Sushant until early 2019 and then we lost touch. Now I can make sense of perhaps what transpired and his loss has left me with immesurable grief.

I am a feminist and I care about women’s issues. My first point is that caring about women’s issues is not incompatible with filing criminal charges against a female suspect. Calling criminal charges against Rhea misogynistic is an incorrect assessment of the situation. While on average, more men tend to engage in criminal behavior, criminality is not outside the purview of women.

My second point is that I do personally believe that there should not be a “special” stigma around mental health issues. Just like physical health, mental health is also an outcome of biology and the environment. The reason I said “special” is that it’s nearly impossible to completely eliminate stigma from health issues. For eg., if there is a person suffering from diabetes, there will be some amount of stigma about his/her lifestyle even if this person was genetically predisposed. Similarly, whether we like it or not, there is no country in the world where stigma around mental health is zero. I live in the United States and there is a tremendous amount of stigma around mental health here. So, even if we are able to bring down the “special” stigma, we might not be able to completely eliminate it. However, since there is an enormous amount of stigma today, mental health information is protected by the law of the land. Disclosing mental health information by a psychotherapist/psychologist is not only unethical but also illegal (except for certain circumstances which don’t apply here). I leave it to my father-in-law to press charges on this matter.

My third point is a question on the validity of Susan’s claims. Diagnosing mental disorders is an arduous task and diagnosing someone Bipolar (I or II) is even more so. Not only do you have to observe the person very closely, but you also have to observe them over long periods of time (it takes six years on average to diagnose after the onset of symptoms). Susan very conveniently diagnoses Sushant in less than two months (perhaps over a couple of appointments), with a life-changing diagnosis. And then she has the audacity to disclose this information in the public domain. If we are to believe Susan, another thing which does become clear is that it was Rhea indeed who was seeking treatment for Sushant and not Sushant himself. Prior to October/November 2019 (and certainly prior to meeting Rhea), as far as I know, no one who has lived with Sushant has ever complained about his mental health, nor has Sushant himself.

My fourth point is questioning Rhea’s role in the matter. I am not using any special information and I am quoting everything available in the public domain. The FIR claims that Sushant was perhaps given psychotropic drugs by Rhea (maybe even without his knowledge). Covert/Surreptitious medication is also perhaps illegal in the 21st century. There could be many explanations of this sudden onset of mental health issues in October/November of 2019. This could be a result of covert medication and withdrawal of psychotropic drugs (perhaps the covert medication stopped during their Europe trip in October 2019 [perhaps because of eating out mostly so no opportunity to covertly medicate him with food? or perhaps intentionally not medicating?], which led to withdrawal symptoms). And then, he was perhaps taken to the psychotherapist under the pretext of care. Another surprising thing is that setting up appointments and being present at the appointments (both done by Rhea) could be a sign of keeping a tab on Sushant’s conversations with the psychotherapist and keeping evidence of mental health issues so that it can be used later for blackmail or to justify the firm control on his resources. If what was bothering him was Rhea’s gaslighting and blackmail, Sushant probably was not given that privacy to discuss. The more important mental health discussion here could be that of Narcissistic Personality Discorder and/or sociopathy/psychopathy for Rhea. Sushant seemed to have suffered gaslighting at the hands of Rhea, based on the information in the public domain. Antisocial Personality Disorder is the more technical term for sociopathy/psychopathy and could be potentially diagnosed for Rhea (I am not diagnosing, only suggesting). Based on what happened, gaslighting seems to fit the bill, in addition to other methods of confinement and control. Again, I have every right to question based on the information in the public domain and unlike Barkha Dutt, I am NOT privy to the statements from Rhea’s psychotherapist and I am not disclosing private mental health information. Based on the evidence in the public domain so far and the claims in the FIR, Rhea is the prime suspect in this case. It will indeed be a shocking surprise to the entire nation if it is found in the court of law that she was a loving partner and not an opportunist who eliminated most of Sushant’s ties with his family and friends.

My final point is that of disappointment in Barkha Dutt in this matter. Please understand that I am not attacking all her work. I am very disappointed with the path she chose in this matter. Unless proven in the court of law that Sushant took his own life because of a mental illness that happened without any foul play (gaslighting, blackmail, covert medication, or overt overmedication), this is NOT the example to use to create awareness around mental illness. Even if proven in the court of law, the only thing that can be even remotely used is the awareness aspect of it with the intention to help and never the intimate details of the diagnosis or disclosure of diagnosis from the mental health professional.

Barkha Dutt could have chosen to emphasize the financial angle. Most crimes have a financial angle and when there are so many pointers (from regular cash withdrawals and large expenses to shell companies), she chose to NOT focus on them and that does reek of agenda.

As a fellow feminist and an intellectual, I am very disappointed today and you will lose a lot of credibility amongst your readership. You still have an opportunity to amend by reflecting on the choice you made and perhaps apologizing for not deliberating on this enough before hitting publish. Perhaps, that will restore some trust in your journalism. Please understand again that this is not a personal attack but an expression of disappointment in the approach you took in the aftermath of our beloved Sushant’s death.

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Posted: 5 years ago

Thanks for sharing Priya. His BIL has summarized exactly what is so effin annoying about what all these celebs and journos are trying to do (all those expressing their sympathies with Rhea and disdain over "mental health ignorance")


Now there seems to be this deliberate attempt to shut up and even mock the family , friends and loved ones of Sushant for their backward thinking about depression. Because, of course, Ankita's inarticulate comments and thoughts about it , and his family's dislike of Rhea automatically and collectively proves that their judgement and objectivity is clouded. How dare they setback the mental health discourse a hundred years for their personal gains?!🤔

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Posted: 5 years ago

Originally posted by: sensodynee


We just don't change do we?! 😆 These are the exact thing in my mind.


This has been in my mind and I was so apprehensive to even watch his show and I'm even more not proud to say I watched Arnab show after some million years.


I really don't know why she is doing all this, but for now she seems to appointed as spoke person for his family. Those 2 minutes were more than enough for me not watching her interview anymore.


I'm eating my own words and willing freely to say Ankita please stop. 😆 This says atleast with me that we don't know them anymore not even Ankita ever since 2016.


Gosh I think some parts of us never change Nisha. I fear i will still have the urge to go back and defend ankita for pages endlessly like before, and unfortunately at this point I can't handle it, plus have finally matured a bit at this point to know it is useless.

I think ankita's media bytes were planned, not an impulsive decision, as the only known face in this little group fighting by themselves, to sway public narrative that there could be more to this whole thing than just a sad and sick boy taking his life- a narrative fed in everyone's head now thanks to kangana and everyone else (who unfortunately has still been sticking to it and was also using anki's name some time back) . And I personally feel ankita should focus on that only, highlight why the family feels they should be fighting for him, with the family lawyer alongside her. Using words like 'he can't be in depression as he was a lovely boy' won't help. That would be a smarter way to fight while also managing to keep her private life out of it. (Now I haven't watched all the videos, I'm just going with what has been shared in the forums. If she's already addressed these issues, then great.)

The rest of the media coverage is still making my mind spin, though the most likely scenario seems to me that rhea embezzled sushants funds while he was being treated for mental illness and hardly interested in what was happening

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