ARSHI FF- INBOX INSANITY- MESSAGE (5)- DINNER DATE - Page 6

OMG.. my jaw is hurting so bad n still stop smiling..

Hahahaha! This really is something else fallingpieces.

Ah, the journey through the tube I imagine, is as similar as the Mumbai Local. The experience is universal.

Round one definitely goes to Khushi! Where did Arnav get the banana from. Like really - banana?!?! XD

There's definitely no one like Lavanya. ;)

Please continue. Waiting (not so) patiently.

MESSAGE (4): PANIC

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From: Lavanya Kasyap

To: Khushi Gupta

Subject: He's Got It (The Right Stuff)

I realise you probably have a lot of BananaBoy-related drama to fill me in on, but I have NK-related drama to fill you in on and it is 100% more interesting than your drama because it involves me.

So last night I came home from work and my front door was just... open. Obviously I freaked the hell out and ran down the stairs again as fast as I could because I'm not a moron and this isn't a horror movie.

Also, I'm not the kind of "Intelligent-Geeky-But-Beautiful" type who survives to the end of the movie, I'm the "Perky-Boobs-Bimbo-Cheerleader" type who is only really there to get killed first (while conveniently being topless and making out with my boyfriend who it'll inevitably turn out actually prefers IGBB anyway).

So I ran down the stairs and straight into NK who saw my blind panic and was like "What's wrong?"

I managed to babble something vaguely coherent about my door being open and NK just firmly grasped my shoulders and looked me straight in the eyes and said "I'll go check it out."

Which, hello, Mr Knight In Shining Armour much? I followed him up the stairs and he looked back at me and I was semi-hoping he'd see me as a delicate flower and be all "No, you wait there and be safe." But instead he did something even more attractive and was all "Are you sure you want to come with me?"

Maybe it's because he felt my biceps when he grabbed my arms and figured I could be useful?

Anyways, we get up to my apartment and sure enough, the door was still open. New Kid walked quietly over to the front door and pushed it open with his foot, arms up boxer style. And then he just ran inside. Obviously I followed straight after him, 911 dialled into my phone and finger ready to hit Call.

Suddenly I heard this screaming from the kitchen and NK yelling and things being thrown everywhere and then NK yelling some more and then something smashed and I realised I recognised the screams.

It was my mom (though I guess now that you're in the UK I should call her mum'?). She had apparently used her key to get in and left the door open because she thought that would be less suspicious than her being inside with the door closed. And when she saw NK she thought he was some sort of New York predator and threw everything from a bread knife to a bread loaf at him.

Looong story short, NK charmed mom to bits (I suppose my love of Knights to the Rescue had to have come from somewhere), and he ended up having dinner with us. He's a boxer, Khushi. Like a professional boxer. He gets paid. To box.

Can you imagine the body he must have under those fitted black jeans and long-sleeved grey t-shirt?

I can, Bananatits, and it is beautiful.

Must dash. Promised NK I would cycle beside him as he runs and he's knocking on the door as I type.

Now, how'd the rest of the day go with BananaBoy?

Love,

La

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From: Khushi Gupta

To: Lavanya Kasyap

Subject: Step By Step

Your romance builds ;)

You've become so self-aware lately, Lavanya. I'm very proud of you. You are definitely the PBBC to my IGBB. Though ew as though I would want to go out with any man you'd date. I mean, a boxer? I do not understand how you deal with these fitness freaks.

I guess you are one so it kind of makes sense but, still. Why are we even friends again?

I will admit though, NK sounds hot. And also like he might actually be a decent guy! Did you hear violins playing in the background when he held you in his arms and agreed to check your apartment for you? Or well, since you're in New York did you at least hear a busker with an accordion or a saxophone?

Also, your mum is the cutest but she 100% needs a crash course in how to survive New York.

Please keep me informed on The Adventures of Unclothing NK.

BananaBoy's name is Arnav Singh Raizada and URGH it's been one day and I am already ready to strangle either him, myself or a complete stranger.

So shortly after The Banana Incident, we had to sit down together so he could show me how the UK software works. It's different to the New York one because the IT Guys here aren't as utterly incompetent as the ones we have and so have been coming up with fixes and adapting the software on the fly. They actually managed to fix an issue I've been working on for- well, never mind nobody cares about that, least of all you.

And okay, props to Arnav he wasn't patronising at all and didn't try to Mansplain anything, he would be like "Do you understand how this works or do you want me to run through it with you?" and if I said "I get it." He'd just believe me and move on. And if I didn't, he'd just use technical terms and trust that I'd ask if I didn't understand something. Obviously I understood everything, but you know most men like to think women know as much about computers as men know about shades of MAC lipsticks.

That is the only positive thing I have to say about him.

Now, I don't know if he did this on purpose or not but as we were rounding off, he leaned across me and his leg was pressed against mine and he smelled so good and I just... I panicked.

I tried to push my chair back to get away from him but I pushed too hard and the chair went flying backwards and Arnav must have the reflexes of a freaking ninja because he managed to catch me as I was falling and pull me up and really close to him. Like I was pressed up against his chest.

And omg he smelt even better up close and I just took a huge sniff and that's when he pushed me away from him and started yelling at me because... well because I'd left an imprint of my face on his shirt.

Like you could see an outline of my face because of the foundation.

And my eyeshadow.

And my mascara.

And my lipstick.

On his white shirt.

I was so embarrassed I could have evaporated on the spot but instead... I went on the defensive.

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From: Lavanya Kasyap

To: Khushi Gupta

Subject: You On The Defensive

Oh Lord have Mercy on his soul.

Is he dead? Did you kill him?

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From: Khushi Gupta

To: Lavanya Kasyap

Subject: He's Alive And Well

However, I did tell him that maybe he should wear makeup proof shirts since he's obviously such a massive mans**t.

Omg La, I s**t-shamed him in front of the entire office. WITH NO BASIS. And at this point everyone was staring at us and he just goes "Right. Right." And then grabbed my hand and started pulling me through the office towards the private ones at the back and I panicked again on top of my previous panic and just started yelling "KIDNAP. HELP. KIDNAP."

And now the whole office thinks I'm insane. Though to be fair, I'm American so they probably already kind of thought that.

So Arnav dragged me to the office of Akash Raizada (yes they're related, cousins apparently) and told him to fire me immediately.

And Akash says "Why?"

And Arnav says "LOOK AT MY SHIRT."

And Akash says "That's an interesting print."

And Arnav started spluttering with indignation and I started giggling and looked at Akash with gratitude and he winked at me and smiled so I think I like him, even though he's related to the Rakshas.

In the end, Akash didn't fire me but did send me out of the room so Arnav could change into a spare shirt.

Arnav refused to speak to me for the rest of the day, but he did send me emails. I will forward you a transcript.

Khushi.

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From: Arnav Singh Raizada

To: Khushi Gupta

Subject: My Shirt

It is too large and it itches because Akash uses biological detergent. I hope you're happy.

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From: Khushi Gupta

To: Arnav Singh Raizada

Subject: I Am Happy

You're itching like a baboon in heat. It is hilarious to me.

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From: Arnav Singh Raizada

To: Khushi Gupta

Subject: A Baboon In Heat?

Are you trying to say you've been checking out my arse, Miss Gupta?

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From: Khushi Gupta

To: Arnav Singh Raizada

Subject: The Red Bum Of A Baboon

That only applies to fertile, female baboons. Are you fertile and female, Mr Raizada?

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From: Arnav Singh Raizada

To: Khushi Gupta

Subject: Fertile, Yes. But Definitely Not Female

Surely the pertinent question here is whether or not I am a baboon?

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From: Khushi Gupta

To: Arnav Singh Raizada

Subject: That Isn't Pertinent

It's inefficient to ask questions with obvious answers.

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From: Arnav Singh Raizada

To: Khushi Gupta

Subject: This Conversation

This is the stupidest discussion I have ever been a part of.

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From: anika@oberoipr.com

To: Khushi Gupta

Subject: Introductory Email

Hi Khushi,

Hope you don't mind me calling you that. My name's Anika and I work for the PR Firm two floors below you guys. I work for the Financial PR side of the company and since you're heading up big changes in Alliance, we'll probably be seeing quite a bit of each other over the next few months.

So, I have a pretty good friend up at Alliance (have you met her yet? Her name's Ishana) and she tells me you made quite the entrance this morning. My Demon boss- Shivaay Singh Oberoi- is good friends with the Demon colleague you apparently assaulted earlier- Arnav Singh Raizada.

Better known as The Demon Squad.

We're keeping a running tally of Us vs. Them. I personally get through any and all interactions with SSO by finding ways to irritate, annoy and frustrate him as many times as possible in as short a time as possible. Might I suggest you try the same tactic with ASR?

Though I have to admit, even Shivaay has never thrown a banana across the room at me. Is Arnav five?

I was wondering, since you don't really know anyone yet, would you like to come and have lunch with me and Ishana? We were thinking of heading to Wasabi.

Warm regards,

Anika

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From: Khushi Gupta

To: Anika

Subject: Lunch

Sounds great. I'll meet you in the foyer at 1?

I have a lot to vent regarding the Actual Spawn of Rakshas. I doubt it's possible that your SSO could be worse: I just discovered mushed up banana I hadn't realised was caught in my hair.

I need all the coping strategies I can get if I'm going to survive the next few months.

Best wishes,

Khushi

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From: Anika

To: Khushi Gupta

Subject: ASR vs SSO

Oh, Satan Singh Oberoi?

I promise you. He's worse.

See you at 1.

MESSAGE (5): DINNER DATE

Lavanya and NK! LAVANYA AND NK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Mate

I WAS NOT READY FOR THIS LOOOL 😆

Probably the funniest update so far! I neeed moreee 😛 can't wait for the next one!

I am rolling in my seat as I read this. Very difficult to explain to my colleague, what in a legal agreement has sparked off such mirth! 😆 🤣 🤣

OMG...thats hilarious...

Hi,