Ok, before I say anything else, That precap was definitely a tearjerker! Wish I wouldn't cry buckets when I read the next part, but with your writing I know I will; i'd better fetch them now itself.
I could literally feel Manvi's loneliness and desolation in this part. I liked how Manvi restrained herself from being blinded by jealousy. Its admirable that she's not holding any ill feelings towards Seema. That shows her inner maturity. But even maturity can't prevent the emotions she's experiencing, and definitely not her argument with Virat. Manvi and Seema haven't got to know each other well, Virat hasn't really made an effort to make that happen. And on one fine day, he asks Manvi to reveal her innermost secret, which is hidden even from her di? His intention is good, it's in Manvi's best interest, but he hasn't handled it the way he should have. He hasn't balanced his relationship with Manvi and his friendship with Seema, just like Jeevika with her sister and family in the show. Like bhabi like Devar :-D
The Jeeju-Saali scene was wonderful. I was really happy when Manvi decided to tell her jeeju, knowing full well that he can't keep it from Jeevika. Enough of the hiding business!
a point: 'Giju' seems a bit strange for me while reading. If you're ok, then can you change it to 'jiju' or even 'jeeju'?
Don't worry about being carried away by sisterly love in this part. It was really necessary at this stage. Loved how Manvi prepared Jeevika for the truth. I don't know whether you're planning to show Jeevika breakdown, but I really want Manvi to break down about the Virat-Seema thing to Jeevika, and Jeevika comforting her. Jeevika knowing about virman would become tensed, but I have full faith in her, she'd definitely support it for Manvi's happiness.
*looking up and reading what I've typed* woah! So much! Need to get to the point and wind up..
Brilliantly written, you've successfully brought out Manvi's emotions, the characters and situations are handled really well. I feel like I'm reading an alternate version of the show. although I don't think Virat would leave Manvi alone to such an extend, I don't mind, it is a possibility and you've presented it well.
Eagerly waiting for the next part. Continue soon..
Athira
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