Anurag Kashyap’s daughter Aaliyah receives rape threats after posting - Page 6

Originally posted by: HearMeRoar

See, I get that generalizations are never good. But when there's a pattern, it shouldn't be ignored. Or the problem will never get solved. There *is* an issue - be it patriarchy or Bollywood's normalization of such behavior or sexual repression or the ingrained idea that women in public are public property or whatever. Needs to be tackled. It's not about maligning but about finding a fix.

I could probably do a little digging and come up with data on demographics of vile social media behavior. Not going to because it will only set off an argument in which sides will be taken based on politics. The info is out there for anyone to pick up.

I'll exit the argument with one small observation. No one is going to know how dehumanizing and humiliating it is unless and until they've been on the receiving end. I got only a small taste of it. And I'm a grown woman. The girl we're talking about is what? 15 or 16? Can't even imagine what could've gone through her mind. Trust me, they don't need to hear "You should've... you should do..." etc. They need full-throated support.

There is an issue which needs to be tackled by punishing the offender, unless people are successful, telling someone to take precautions is not victim shaming.

If I tell someone to not go outside at night in a shady area, it isn't because I am against their freedom, it is because I am aware of the dangers in that area.

See here we are again, we both agree that girls or boys need to be protected against Internet sexual harassments, and people responsible should be punished. But we are arguing just because our outlook of the current situation and the course of its handling is different. And this is just a random chat among random strangers in a random Internet forum. This same tendency happens in important places, and the main issue always gets lost.

Lingerie is absolutely irrelevant here.

A significant chunk of @$%$$ Indian men are hugely problematic and any woman who puts up a profile picture is prone to sexual harassment. Heck! One can't even post comments without these lowly and disgraceful pieces of trash polluting the space with lewd replies.

My former roommate's inactive public Instagram account had no posts. There was just an average profile picture. And yet, she received so many lewd messages that ultimately she had to deactivate it. Nobody deserves this kind of harassment.

I hope Aaliyah's parents take legal action against those b******* and they rot in jail.

P.S. At the risk of appearing an elitist snob, I too feel that internet shouldn't be available to everyone in countries like India.

Originally posted by: MujheMaarjaneDo

In an ideal world, the first step would be to punish those creeps. A girl may click her pics in anyway she wants, with clothes, less clothes or nude, people shouldn't be giving her sexual threats or moral policing her or slvt shaming her. And if someone does, he or she should be punished.

But wait, our world isn't ideal. Our world just sucks, so when someones tells you to ignore or block, not always it means they are blaming the victims, but telling you to take precautions. Are they suggesting correct advice? No. But is their intention bad? No.

Yeah, intention not being bad is not an excuse.

Asking women to take precautions by ignoring or blocking such accounts on social media is the same as telling them to not wear short clothes, not go out late at night, avoid eve teasing and sexual harassment in public places instead of creating a scene.

Such advise would always be problematic because you are again trying to control women, not the creepy men.

Aaliya has right to wear clothes of her choice. People should mind their own business. Even if commenters are anoymous, still the ip address can be traced.

To all conservatives out their women and girls do buy fancy lingirie to look hot and sexy. Aaliya also feels the same.

Originally posted by: Harley_Quinn

Yeah, intention not being bad is not an excuse.

Asking women to take precautions by ignoring or blocking such accounts on social media is the same as telling them to not wear short clothes, not go out late at night, avoid eve teasing and sexual harassment in public places instead of creating a scene.

Such advise would always be problematic because you are again trying to control women, not the creepy men.

I didn't talked about about wearing short clothes, keeping quite sexual harassment or eve teasing, so don't add those lines to create misconception of me suggesting to control women. Those things have practical way of dealing.

I said until necessary means are created through which such accounts are easily identified and punished, it is better to block them, the only means available through which toxicity in social media can be controlled. And this isn't something just about girls, in today's social media world, many predatory pedophiles are also targeting young teen boys. Yes cyber police is there, and it is doing its job as much as it can, but it isn't upto the mark and nor the investment on it, is being enough.

It is like saying don't go near the lake, unless you have life jacket. Now when there is no life jacket, saying don't go near the lake, isn't controlling the girl or boy, it is about safety precautions.

This issue is something which requires a whole society to change, but we can't change society in one go and most a family can do is, educate their male members and also female members that, a female's dress shouldn't be a means to judge her or respect her. Until every family learns it, advising to tackle the problems with the best means possible currently, isn't controlling a women.

Originally posted by: HearMeRoar

Sorry to say Indian men have become notorious on social media for crass behavior.

I keep most of my social media either private or anon (like IF). I do have a public FB page which I use for my writings. I used to have an Insta page, too. The first profile pic (in both) was kind of nice. Not lingerie like Aaliyah put up. A headshot. That's it. I started getting dirty messages, mostly in my inbox. Some comments on my posts. "Are you available?" is a frequent question. Plenty of "I love you"s. A couple of pics (you know the kind). A few offers to make me the sub in S&M. I deleted all of them.

Eventually, I put up the most regular pic of myself I could find. It's not bad, but very casual, makeup-less, and gharelu type profile photo. The messages didn't stop.

Bottomline is clear. No matter what you wear, no matter if you go without makeup, no matter how G-rated your posts are (mine are), you're going to face sexual harassment. And yeah, the pervs are not of any particular socioeconomic class or age. I've checked the profiles; some appear to be retired professors, etc. (they could be lying on FB).

I deleted my Insta account. Still have the FB page. I delete loathsome comments as soon as I find them. Some of my family follow the page, so they alert me. I report and block the pervs. I have an agent who I vent to (no, I'm no celeb; just a writer). My editor, who actually has a large Twitter following, wants me to out the pervs; she says she will share the posts on her social media. I can't handle it, so I thanked her and told her not for now.

Each time I get a particularly vile message, I find myself unable to write for a few days. Thanks to my very supportive signfiicant other and family and friends, I bounce back each time.

Sharing this only because of the sheer number of people who assume women *ask for it* some way. All I asked for was to be allowed to write.

Think I'm alone? Read this:

https://sachinrsharma.wordpress.com/2016/01/27/why-indian-men-are-hated-by-foreign-women-on-social-media/

EDITED TO ADD: one of the main reasons the comments elsewhere about lowering expectations get my goat is this. Why should I? Either in my safety (physical and mental) or where my career is concerned? I'm a human with the same God-given rights as any other human on this planet, man, woman, somewhere in between, or none of the above. Why not insist that society treat women as human? It might not happen right away, but first instinct should not be to tell the women what she should've done/should do or that she is really not likely to succeed because... yeah, circumstances. Yes, awareness is also important, but those lectures have a time and place and should not take precedence over dealing with social problems.

They start with useless shayari.. And on not receiving response they jump to lewd messages... Some go straight to describing their perverted fantasies... Kitne despos hai iss duniya mein... Don't have an iota of shame... Behuda behavior both offline and online

I have literally been to half of the world and desi men are the ONLY creepy ones who can make you feel naked with their hungry gazing. Whether they are in India or Africa, they are the same with the way they look at women. 🤢

Originally posted by: aish.

Its the ones who post rape threats that lack decency and respect, not the ones who post their own pictures.

If I feel good in a lingerie and want to post it online, I will. I'm posting it because I feel good about myself and think I look fantastic.

Yes, there are risks of posting it online and I need to be prepared for it, but that doesn't it right!!! No matter how prepared I get, getting rape threats is fkn scary and just horribly wrong.

Threatening to rape someone is and should be a big no-no. That said, I think some of the arguments here are silly. For example, you cant and shouldn't be able to post nude pictures of yourself no matter how good you feel about them. Personally, i wouldn't have any problem if someone wanted to pose in the buff. 😉 But just know that not everyone is so enlightened 😛 😂 ... and that there are limits to all that free expression liberal bs.

also, are we sure this kashyap female is not looking for publicity? 😉 I am not saying she is, but she's gotta be dumb to think she wouldn't get trolled for posting racy pictures. Again, it is clearly wrong for people to troll her, but its like defensive driving. If you want to prevent crazies from hitting you, you gotta be careful. Its the world we live in. And even if you think it's all wrong, you're not going to change the world overnight, 😊

Originally posted by: cutejodikangal

I have literally been to half of the world and desi men are the ONLY creepy ones who can make you feel naked with their hungry gazing. Whether they are in India or Africa, they are the same with the way they look at women. 🤢

you think guys in the west are any better? in that case, check out the incidence of date rapes and the drunken lewd behavior that goes on in frats and in colleges in america. We actually have two guys in the US Supreme Court who got confirmed as judges with serious allegations of sexual molestation/ harrassment/ assault against them- clarence thomas and kavanaugh. We even had a Prez who by all accounts was into grabbing stuff. Boy scouts they weren't and aint. 😊

Originally posted by: BirdieNumNum

you think guys in the west are any better? in that case, check out the incidence of date rapes and the drunken lewd behavior that goes on in frats and in colleges in america. We actually have two guys in the US Supreme Court who got confirmed as judges with serious allegations of sexual molestation/ harrassment/ assault against them- clarence thomas and kavanaugh. We even had a Prez who by all accounts was into grabbing stuff. Boy scouts they weren't and aint. 😊

I was talking about my personal experience here. No one else can beat the desi guys in the creepy ‘oogling’ department. Like I said, its not about just India. These guys can do the same where ever they are. They can literally undress a girl with their creepy staring. 🤢