Chapter 4

BitterBerry

@BitterBerry

[NOCOPY]

[MEMBERSONLY]

Holla guys

Yeah you see it right.

I am posting it here but not for too,long , well it depends. Confused

I am just too unwell and tired and busy to send PMs. Hope you understand.

Here is the update.

Enjoy

CHAPTER FOUR

HE

Where is this woman? Why cant she just be present at where she was required more. I need this file and here , her computer open, and she is nowhere to be seen. I glanced at the computer screen. She was reading some old case records. The woman was brutally murdered and was the wife of a police offic...

'Umm sir, these are the files you've asked', she came inside with some files. With her a whiff of peppermint fragrance which had always been maddeningly attractive . I need to control this intoxication. Control. I was nowhere looking at the files but at the screen. Why this stubborn woman can't keep nose out of my life. I turned around looking at her face. Horror was written all over her face.

'what exactly were you doing Riya'?? I was furious. What right she has to poke her mind in my personal life? What just she knows about me? Even if she don't why even she is trying? N

'sir.. I ..really didn't mean to..', oh she already have an explanation ready for this.

'shut up Riya, Just shut up ... What do you think you are Riya? What do you want to prove by going through these case details? Want to help me? Just stop doing anything for me Riya. Stay AWAY FROM ME'!

'but sir..'

'I said STAY AWAY Riya'!! Her misty eyes reflected sadness and gloom. The files were on the floor. Her face blank and she made her way out. What would she do now? Cry? Like always. But I least care. She doesn't understand what she is dealing with. I don't want to hurt her but tragically I am doing. Her place just isn't with me. She doesn't belong here. In this hell. With me.

The peppermint fragrance faded away. So did she.

The air around felt heavy. It was very fascinatingly intoxicated with the peppermint fragrance minutes ago. The cosmos never felt this alive before. But the life is gone. She is gone. Have I ever thought after all these years my feelings would grow to this extent that even her mere presence would affect me devastatingly. Suddenly I felt more blank with my each breathing. Something is missing in the air. Her. Her fragrance. Weren't we in the perfect place. I never wanted to keep her captive in my arms but it felt so right. She was always like a bird of songs, which never settled anywhere. Keeping her captive in the labyrinth of my cursed destiny would have been a sin I thankfully never committed.

'what is her problem with me Arjun? I don't understand... If she'd keep insulting me this way I wont tolerate'. She is still here? Just have to drop her and that's all.

'what would you do'? I smiled. It surely is a view to watch Sakshi Anand irritated and annoyed. Literally she is the source of irritation in the whole ETF and just how beautiful it feels to see the "irritation" irritated. When Riya questioned about her presence, I knew what she meant. I wonder if Sakshi would ever know. This woman is just wasting her time here. She'd have been better in a media house.

'I will strangle her', she said. She blurt out things when she became angry but one should never take her seriously.

'try her.. She is capable enough to break your 200+ bones in minutes Sakshi ', I said ' if your murder plan is ready we can just go home'.

' I was... I was just kidding Arjun, you know me na'.

'Enough'. Nothing can be done for this woman.

Tomorrow will be interesting. There will be one more officer from NIA to assist Riya, though she wont be pleased with that news too.

We walked downstairs taking along some file from the conference room. Only Aisha and Liza were sitting there. That means Shree was also with them. Shree didn't look quiet happy with Riya's arrival. After her resignation, he barely talked to anyone. He busied himself more in office work. He was nearly empty as me. I couldn't understand if he ever loved her. Often I'd see him consoling her. There was the time when she was his relief. But after her I hadn't seen him in peace. He was always restless. Always longing for someone. But after Liza appointed here, I found him in relief again. Liza and Shree were in college I guess. But they were always bitter with each other. That doesn't change the fact that she filled his empty time and kept him engaged. I could feel the bitterness fading away.

'I worked with her in a special case Aisha, and she was fantastic. Her research, her data, statistics, her martial arts, everything was flawless. And I think most the clues about Rana Sikanders case was her investigation'!

'what? You mean she'd helped us in Sikanders case'!

'I think so, back that time she was working on the clues... And weren't most of intelligence clues were from NIA'??

'Hmm right'! Said Aisha nodding at Liza's thoughts. I didn't mean to eavesdrop on ladies talk but when I returned to get my forgotten apartment keys from my chamber I heard them speaking. I don't know how to react to this revelation. Riya helped us. All I remembered was, she had helped us. She helped me. In the one and only mission of my life. Even when I thought she was incapable. Even when I pushed her away. Even when I crushed her every feelings mercilessly like a heartless. All I want is to talk to her.

Two years ago, I wasn't like what I am today. My only lust was revenge. I caught him. I fought with him. I killed him. But I realised it now, i wasn't alone. Along with this team she WAS also with me always without even letting me know.

Should I really go and talk to her? What will she think of me. I never went to her for any other reason. It was always for work or giving orders. She was like that black hole. You would be unaffected from a distance. Go near and you cant fight that attraction. She would absorb you. I never quite understand her. The first time I saw her she was ready to knock me out with angry eyes. Next moment she was surprised finding me as her senior. She had this thing in her to prove herself. To whom? Only she knew. Her next reply confirmed it. She suffered a lot of underestimation and gender bias in her field. But I was least interested in her feminist activity that time. I was only worried for Sheen. I had my own set of troubles to deal with and she was just a distraction. Afterwards our relation was awkward. I don't know if I had hate her the moment she tried to invade my personal life, but I never wanted her near me. Keeping her with me was a risk. But she was just too stubborn to understand that. I tried my best to keep her out of my life. But she was never away I guess.

Without interrupting anyone of the ladies I walked downstairs. Under my doormat I have that duplicate key. Sakshi was already in the SUV. She was , as usual in the passenger seat and was still looking grumpy. This isn't over yet. She'd leave no chance of any argument with Riya.

I climbed inside the SUV and she smiled. She have something ok mind, her face and smile told that and if she have something in mind that would never good for me. I started the SUV.

'arjun , see it's 9 only... Lets have dinner together tonight', what? Dinner? With her? Again? Last time we went for dinner she was hell clingy and made me do window shopping of every girl entered the hotel. No way I am going with this matrimonial site admin , anywhere.

'No Sakshi, I have two hand, 10 fingers and I also know cooking. You can just pack something for yourself'. I said and the smile faded. I parked the SUV near by a restaurant and she just stared at me.

'what are you waiting'?

'you are sure not coming'?? Why cant she understand, I am not interested in having dinner with her.

'hurry up or I'll leave you here '!!! And she finally went inside. I was just sitting there silently. I stared at the sky . It was cloudy. I don't understand people writing poems about weather but now I think humans depression has been always connected with this weather. What? When people have nothing to do they think about weather. And exactly what I am doing now.

I was looking outside the window. The sky looked stormy as if it would burst right now. On the other side of the road there was a SUV parked. ETF SUV. They are here? I looked outside searching them. Nobody was inside. And it started as if the sky is screaming but with a rhythm pouring the drops of life. I didn't know when my eyes fixated on the particular figure. Same gray tank top and black jeans , hair open and partially wet, standing in front of the cake shop. Chotu was standing beside her and was telling something, not to her but his gestures were towards the SUV. May be shree is inside and I didn't see him. She was looking at the sky. Like I was doing a minutes ago.

I thought I was crazy when the first time I looked into her eyes. As if I saw rainbows. But I wasn't crazy. She had those colours in herself ,which reflected in her eyes. But now only a mystical shade of gray entangled in the waves of her own coldness. I wanted to pray to the rain. To bring back the missing rainbow but I don't think the gray fog will fade.

Sometimes technology causes greater irritation. The phone always rings in a odd time. I picked up. Sakshi. I totally forgotten about her. She must be stuck there inside the hotel because of rain.

'yes Sakshi, it is in the back seat, just wait there I am going? ... What? Shut up! You have your food packed? No more drama!wait there', she is still adamant about having dinner here. I picked up the umbrella from the back seat and climbed out of the SUV. I didn't want to be late. Otherwise I would have ended up having dinner with her. Just in a minute later she came out holding the parcel. And I doubt she if she had any plan to feed her neighbours too, the food is enough. Sometimes she just act like Chotu. Too hungry in between cases. We left after she settled inside.

Sakshi talked about the awesome food they serve there, and some specials too but I was only over hearing. Its still strange how she manages to come up with so much in reply getting my silence only. There was one weak moment when I blurt out what the team means to me and after that I guess she became immune to my rudeness. Everyone in the team does that. Ignore my rudeness. And after that she acted a little friendly. She knows she has no hope with me. But still she is here. Reason I don't know. I made it clear to her that very day she brought those roses to my chamber, that she should give up on the thought that we could be anything together and till now I am living upto that. I never thanked her though. She too helped me a lot with Sikanders case. That was the time when she wasn't stupid. She was something else. As if the purpose of my life was hers too. Sikander was killed and that killed something inside her too. I had never seen her the way she relived with a cry. Though she pretend to be in physical pain, she cried because something died inside her and then she smiled as if she was alive again. After that she was never serious. I dropped her in front of her society gate and she just wished me a good night , very usual.

It took me another fifteen minutes to reach my apartment building. I didn't want to leave Ravi lodge but Rathod forced me lamely saying he was tired of paying my lodge bills, but that idiot never paid for me and I had to move into this apartment which Chotu arranged for me. My flat was on the fifth floor. I had my keys neatly pressed under the doormat.

One bedroom , one dining hall and kitchen. Nothing fancy or luxurious. I was more familiar with lodge. This place here is more suffocating. No idea how Rathod find it as a peaceful place. He had only been here twice, once when I shifted and other time when he was with Aisha and we discussed case. I was sick that time and case was important so he had to come. Relief is I have no irritating neighbours. The flat in front of my door is still empty. Society chief person said, the owner was still unconvinced to sell this flat and never appeared here too. I spent most of my morning in the jogging area and at night the gym is my heaven.

My room is a messed up place with files and papers and sometimes I just sleep on the couch leaving the bed. That trash is of no use. I went to kitchen and checked the fridge. Half empty half full. There was bread and those potatoes I boiled this morning. I could just make sandwich and that's enough.

I am not quite friendly with sleep too. Insomniac, this apartment turned me into an insomniac. Nightmares still haunts me. They aren't something I can control. They make me restless . Sometime I just wait till sunrise. To feel the fresh morning fog. The wait is better with a blank mind rather be helpless in my own nightmares. I wonder if I'd ever see dreams. Even my dreams sounds distant and of course a dream.