Originally posted by: .IamShonali.
Haha! Dont worry! It isnt really a tragedy story. I am just going to touch some emotional chords again for both the characters!
I hope you like the further updates <3 Keep reading
Thank you Shona for not penning down a trajedy story...
Eagerly waiting for the update....
Oh! No one knows about her miscarriage?! I thought it was only hidden from Abir.
Wait and watch ;p ;p ;p
Chapter 2: Reminiscence Part 1
“I had a miscarriage…..” said Mishti with tears brimming in her eyes.
Shock was an understatement. Abir felt as if the ground underneath his feet just slipped. It didn't make sense. He felt as if his senses were giving up. He felt as if his brain just froze for that moment. He had nightmares about that day. He thought he had assumed the worst about that day. But this was beyond his imagination.
“Mishti had a miscarriage? She was pregnant? When? How?” Abir continuously thought to himself as he was trying to digest this information. He loosened his hold from her shoulders and took a step back slowly. Mishti was unsure and confused about handling the situation further. Abir was still suffering from PTSD. And his doctor had recommended Mishti to be careful about revealing any shocking news to him. And if it were to be revealed, she had to be very patient in handling that. She was advised to give him more time to process such information as there was a possibility that he could react in a different manner. Something that was unknown and unseen for Mishti. She just hoped that he was ok.
Abir sat down on the bed, unable to react. Mishti understood Abir’s confusion and difficulty to digest this news. Ever since 2 weeks, she has been struggling to wrap this around her head. So it was obvious to her that Abir would struggle with that too. She got down on her knees. With tears in her eyes, she held his hand again tightly and said “Abir, I understand if this is confusing for you. I understand if you need more time to talk about this. But I want you to know that I am here. Also Abir, I have to inform you this: No one in the family knows. I wanted you to be the first one to find out about it.”
That was yet another shocker for Abir. First he got to know that she was pregnant and that she miscarried. And now, she had managed to hide that successfully, not only from him but from the entire family. He kept looking towards Mishti with confusion. He was struggling to form words. Mishti was trying to understand but she wasn't able to decipher his reaction. She knew he was doing recovering well overall after the incident. But she also knew that he wasn't totally recovered. She knew this information could again remind him of the traumatic event that they were desperately trying to leave behind. She kept caressing his fingers using her thumb, while holding his hand.
Few mins passed by. Mishti was constantly looking towards Abir, making sure he was ok. Abir closed his eyes and exhaled some air. “How?“ A lump formed in his throat and he stopped. He tried talking again. “Are you ok?”. He held her hands and pulled her to sit right next to him. She nodded in agreement, with tears in her eyes.
“Why didn't you tell me before? I could have helped.” Abir’s voice cracked by the end.
“I was struggling with it myself. I just didn't know how to break this news to you. I was scared” A droplet of tears fell from her eye as she said it.
“But you could have told me that you were pregnant?” Abir looked towards Mishti with desperation as he said this.
“I didn't know myself,” said Mishti with helplessness.
That confused Abir again. He looked towards her curiosity. Mishti understood his bewilderment. She swallowed her own saliva, straightened her back and said “I didn't know I was pregnant. I mean. I did have an inclination about it that day. But before I could get it confirmed, I miscarried”. Mishti tried her best to not fall weak. She fought a constant war with her tears for them to not fall. She wanted to remain strong like she has been.
Before she knew Abir just pulled her into a hug. They both silently cried in each other's embrace. They stayed like that for quite some time. Their embrace has always been their solace no matter the situation. And this time, they both needed it.
A phone call interrupted their moment. As they broke their embrace to check the call, it was Rajshri. Abir checked the time and sighed. This was one another part of their routine. Ever since they have been back after the incident, Rajshri would always call at that hour to check up on both of them. Before answering the call, they both cleared their throats to make sure she doesn't doubt anything. As they answered the call, Rajshri instantly felt something was amiss as she heard their voice. She tried pushing to know what was going on but was unsuccessful. Helplessly, she ended the call.
“If you wouldn't have told me that you didn't inform anyone, I would have assumed Badi Ma knew. Ever since that day, there hasn't been a single day where she hasn't called and asked about you.” Mishti smiled as Abir continued.
“The way you guys silently spoke to each other, when you met or even on the call... Mishti… The way she looked at you with tears. Even today! Are you sure she doesn't know?” Abir asked inquisitively.
“I haven't told her Abir.” Mishti said while nodding in disagreement. Abir tried to say something but Mishti interrupted. “She is my mom Abir. She has always sensed and will always sense if she feels I am in trouble or if she feels that I need her. She can read my eyes too. And if she reads something, she has become careful in not believing the facade I try to put to cover it. And ever since our break up, she has become much more careful about it. Maybe she doubts that something has happened but she definitely doesnt know anything about my miscarriage.”
Abir nodded and looked towards Mishti “This is all so”
“Shocking, I know” interrupted Mishti. “I know you want to know everything that happened that day. But not at the risk of your health.” Mishti cupped his face. “This is all shocking and surprising. And I want you to take as much time as you need to digest this. We can continue this tomorrow or some other day. Right now, it's time for your medicines. Abir please. Lets just sleep for now.” Mishti requested as she saw him getting dejected with that idea. Abir couldn't fight harder for it. He understood she wasn't just asking time for him but also for herself. He knew it was hard for her to share those details too. They both anyways have had a long day. It was time they called it a night.
But sleep wasn’t anywhere close to Abir. He felt really restless and unsettled. He was still not able to understand and digest the truth. He wasn't able to digest how Mishti was able to hide it from everyone, including him. He couldn't believe that he couldn't read her like Rajshri did. He knew her in and out. Even more than her own parents sometimes. Yet, he couldn't manage to notice what Rajshri did? What lacked? He felt as if he got blind again like he was during their break up. When he couldn't read through her facade.
He always felt amused at the relationship Mishti-Rajshri shared. Not bounded by blood but strongly bounded by heart. He also felt blessed because she showered as much motherly love on him as she did on Mishti. Whenever a child is hurt, the first person a child usually remembers is his or her mother. And he needed a mother. After Rajshri came in his life, she had really taken a place of a doting mother in his life. When he would think of mother, the first picture that would come to his mind was of Rajshri. And hence, he just felt like talking to her, inform her about her daughter's yet another stupid facade and share what he felt. He needed help in understanding this situation. He needed in knowing what had to be done and how. He also needed help understanding his own feelings regarding this. He knew unlike his mother, Rajshri will be there to hear him out, understand his pain and guide him in the right direction. But it was way too late for him to wake her up.
He looked towards Mishti and found her sleeping. He desperately wanted to talk to her but he gave up on that idea. He knew she hadn't been sleeping well, courtesy his nightmares. And after knowing what she has been through herself, he knew she needed as much care and attention that she showered on him, unconditionally. He wasn't going to disturb her. He thought about Meenu and closed his eyes. It was a lost cause. He knew his relationship with his mother had been difficult. She was the last person to understand his feelings in this matter. More so, she would just have gotten an opportunity to taunt Mishti for being irresponsible.
He made a slight movement to check on Mishti. He knew her sleep had become shallow these days and anything could wake her up. And he wanted to avoid that. He tried it again and she was still sleeping. He slowly got up on his bed, rested his back on his pillow and sat comfortably. He softly opened the drawer on his side, while constantly looking towards Mishti to make sure she didn't wake up and took out his diary. Another best friend of his. He smiled looking towards Mishti as she was the one who had once given him this idea of writing his feelings down when he felt he had no one to share.
He opened the diary, took his pen and started writing:
“What I found out today was rather shocking. I had imagined the worst after what happened that day. But I could never even in my wildest dream or nightmare think about this. She was pregnant. With my child! MY CHILD! And we lost it. She said she didn't know about her pregnancy? But what if in this alternate universe, she knew? I wish she knew. I wish we both knew. I wish that incident never happened. Maybe she would have been happily pregnant right now. And we would have had our baby soon. Mishti would have made an amazing mom. Just like her Badi ma. Maybe I would have troubled Mishti more after teaming up with my kid. Maybe Mishti would have been a little stricter mom? But definitely not like my mother.
To come to think of it, my mother was never like this before. My relationship with her wasn't always this messed up. She did love me unconditionally. Cared for me unconditionally and did everything she could to make sure I was happy. She found pure joy in my daily escapades. She never controlled me. I still miss those moments where I would just sleep in her lap and enjoy her lullaby. I miss those times where she understood my unsaid words. I miss those times when we happily played music together. I know she changed after my father betrayed her. But why did she have to change? She changed so much that I don't even recognize her anymore. I doubt she even recognizes me or herself. She barely knows me now even when she claims she does. Ever since my father broke her heart, she has turned into this new person whom no one would recognize. But no one said anything to her in this family. They all felt indebted to her for taking care of them. The woman, who knew how to love unconditionally then, now had conditions for her love. She demanded blind loyalty and trust for her in return for whatever she did for the family. She always wanted something in return. Which mother does that? Are mothers really that selfish?
She is a perfect business woman right now. She has conditions and deals for everything. Just because she couldn't get her desired love, now she is ready to do anything and everything to get what she wants! No matter the cost. She can put anyone at the risk. Even me. Her own son. She saw how much I struggled with unanswered questions regarding my father and she didn't do anything about it. She removed every small memory associated with him. She became a control freak and that suffocated me. But unlike her, I chose to find my answers in the best way I could. I might have hurt my family in the process but wandering was my only option.She didn't leave me any choice. Or maybe that was my fault. If I didn't wander, maybe I would have understood her better. Maybe she would have understood me better. But was that possible? It would have been easy for her to tell me the truth but she chose not to and she made it increasingly difficult for me to trust her each passing day. I am not sure whether I would have trusted her had she told me the truth about my father earlier. But she didn't even try. So whose fault is it?
What she definitely did try was do everything in her power to keep Mishti away from me. Even after knowing how much I loved her. Even after knowing how much Mishti had done for the family. Even after seeing me die everyday without Mishti. She did everything that caused me pain and yet claimed to have done for my happiness. She knew I was putting up the facade and yet that didn't melt her heart. And I know she still hasn't changed. She is faking to accept my happiness because she has no cards left on her side to play. She compared Mr Mehul Kapadia to Mishti? REALLY? I still don't get it. She destroyed everyone or tried destroying everyone she claimed to love. She tried destroying this family every now and then in the name of keeping them together. And that's why I am always scared of losing Mishti. Losing this family. Losing what I have. Losing what I love the most. Because that will always remain non essential for my mother. But I still choose to hide it. I still genuinely try to make my family happy, unlike my mother.
She wants me to choose her as her priority. But how is that possible when she doesn't do the same for me? Will she ever change? Or has she gone way too far for her to come back? That's why sometimes I obsess over protecting my loved ones from her. But how long can I protect?
It looks like I am destined to lose the happiness that knocks my door for the first time.
I lost my mother and after years of yearning and wandering, I found my mother in badi ma. I lost my dad and after years, I found my dad in bade papa. I lost my home, solace, everything until I found Mishti. I lost her too only to get her back after months of living like a corpse.
And now I lost my child too!!! My first child!! Even after being a poet and writing a rather longer rant on my mother, I am struggling to find words to describe this. I am unable to decide what I am feeling. I just… I am just….. All I am remembering right now is the time I teased Mishti about having our kids... Those dreams definitely did shatter for the time being....
Why is my destiny so strange? Why? Is this a sign that I will always lose something? Am I going to always fail the first time? I guess yearning will remain a part of my destiny, until I live”
Abir exhaled out some air as he was done writing. He had tears in his eyes by the time he finished. Penning down his feelings did settle his unsettled feelings but the question “why” still didn't leave him. He closed his diary, kept it on the side, and looked towards Mishti. He softly caressed her hair, kissed her forehead and retired for the night.
As they both woke up the next day, there was an awkward silence between them. They performed their daily activities but without talking. The family could sense the silence between them during breakfast and hoped that everything was ok between them. Kunal and Nanu constantly made efforts to make small talks to make sure everything was normal. Abir and Mishti tried to involve themselves in those small talks but the stress was rather visible on their faces unlike other times. Everyone quickly wrapped up their breakfast and got busy with their daily routine.
Mishti was looking at some NGO papers when Abir walked into the room. Upon noticing each other, they both exchanged an awkward smile. Breaking the silence, Abir walked towards Mishti, held her hand and politely requested “I want to know what exactly happened that day”
“Abir, are you sure?” Mishti asked with worry.
“Someday I will have to know Mishti. Isn't it better that it happens sooner rather than later? Unless, you aren't ready?” Abir tried to make sure Mishti was comfortable.
“No! I am ready. I have been waiting to tell you” said Mishti with conviction.
Such heartbreaking part, the unshed tears of Abir and immense unsaid pain of mishti of losing own child is so gutwrenching
You are giving all if us such sadistic pleasure in all the pain #MishBir are going thru
Eagerly awaiting next part🙏🙏
Originally posted by: AnkitaPritu
Such heartbreaking part, the unshed tears of Abir and immense unsaid pain of mishti of losing own child is so gutwrenching
You are giving all if us such sadistic pleasure in all the pain #MishBir are going thru
Eagerly awaiting next part🙏🙏
haha! I am so glad to know you are enjoying the sadistic pleasure :)
Thank you for reading and commenting. Will try to update soon :)
Okay. Sabse pehle toh extremely sorry for the late comment, but here we go!!
Chapter One, first.
I'm really curious to know what happened that ended up with Abir getting shot. Did Mehul come back? Naman? Was it Meenakshi's doing? Or did he just end up at the wrong place at the wrong time? So many questions!!
What I love is Mishti just pampering Abir so much. My boy deserves that. Especially from Mishti. I'm sure all the attention just makes him feel over the moon. He's always been an afterthought in his whole family, so getting all the attention, being the first priority, for the person he loves most in the world... I'm sure it means the world to him and it makes me so, so, so happy!! My boy! ❤
And OMFG. That ending. How did Mishti even manage to behave normally all the while she was carrying such a heart-breaking secret with her? How did she smile and pretend she was fine now that Abir was home when she'd just lost her baby? I just... I'm crying. My girl. My girl. My girl. She deserves so much love. Please! I can't even imagine how hard it was her! 😭😭😭
Chapter Two!!
OMFG. ABIR. MISHTI. GOD. BOTH OF THEM. MY HEART IS BREAKING. I AM CRYING. I CAN'T HANDLE THIS. PLEASE. THIS IS THE WORST. WHY DID THIS HAPPEN TO THEM? THEY DESERVE BETTER.
God. Mishti didn't even know she was pregnant. And then she found out she'd lost the baby... I honestly don't know whether that makes it better or worse. Never having experienced that joy and anticipation... But directly finding out that you lost your baby. UGH. It's just... I want to give her a hug. Please. She deserves it. My baby. 😭
She didn't even tell Badi Maa... Like... How, Mishti, how? WHY? You should have spoken to her. She's your mom. God... I can't even. This is so sad. 😭😭😭
And then Abir... Him cursing his destiny like that... NO ABIR. PLEASE. NO. It just makes everything so much worse. Please. Why did this happen?
BOTH MY KIDS. I JUST. NO. PLEASE. I'M CRYING. 😭😭😭😭
😭😭😭 Mishti what are you made of?? Loosing your child like that, not knowing about the preg ...that's like death! And you put up a brave front. Just for Abir! The love is really truly one of a kind.
MishBir should not have to go through this pain of loosing their first child....I mean WHY the F**"
Mish should have atleast spoken or told her BM...she would have been the best support when Abir was incapacitated. You can't do it all on your own Everytime.
Shona...again again again heart touching gut wrenching story. You got all the emotions on the spot.
Kudos...looking forward to read what exactly happened and who was responsible.
Originally posted by: DMGThings
Okay. Sabse pehle toh extremely sorry for the late comment, but here we go!!
Chapter One, first.
I'm really curious to know what happened that ended up with Abir getting shot. Did Mehul come back? Naman? Was it Meenakshi's doing? Or did he just end up at the wrong place at the wrong time? So many questions!!
What I love is Mishti just pampering Abir so much. My boy deserves that. Especially from Mishti. I'm sure all the attention just makes him feel over the moon. He's always been an afterthought in his whole family, so getting all the attention, being the first priority, for the person he loves most in the world... I'm sure it means the world to him and it makes me so, so, so happy!! My boy! ❤
And OMFG. That ending. How did Mishti even manage to behave normally all the while she was carrying such a heart-breaking secret with her? How did she smile and pretend she was fine now that Abir was home when she'd just lost her baby? I just... I'm crying. My girl. My girl. My girl. She deserves so much love. Please! I can't even imagine how hard it was her! 😭😭😭
Chapter Two!!
OMFG. ABIR. MISHTI. GOD. BOTH OF THEM. MY HEART IS BREAKING. I AM CRYING. I CAN'T HANDLE THIS. PLEASE. THIS IS THE WORST. WHY DID THIS HAPPEN TO THEM? THEY DESERVE BETTER.
God. Mishti didn't even know she was pregnant. And then she found out she'd lost the baby... I honestly don't know whether that makes it better or worse. Never having experienced that joy and anticipation... But directly finding out that you lost your baby. UGH. It's just... I want to give her a hug. Please. She deserves it. My baby. 😭
She didn't even tell Badi Maa... Like... How, Mishti, how? WHY? You should have spoken to her. She's your mom. God... I can't even. This is so sad. 😭😭😭
And then Abir... Him cursing his destiny like that... NO ABIR. PLEASE. NO. It just makes everything so much worse. Please. Why did this happen?
BOTH MY KIDS. I JUST. NO. PLEASE. I'M CRYING. 😭😭😭😭
To find out what happened and who shot Abir, wait for the next update! You will know ;p
Yah! I guess we have always seen Abir showering the love and attention on her, especially when she is sick or hurt. So I thought maybe I will create this alternate universe.
How Mishti managed to behave normally will be covered in probably not the next one, but the one after that. I have tried to make sure that I gave it a very realistic touch rather than making her a super human.
And I am extremely sorry to make you cry :(
Yes! Mishti didnt know she was pregnant. Her POV regarding that will also be highlighted in the updates. You touched the right chord with asking the right question. It is something I am planning on addressing in upcoming updates.
Yes! they have seen worse. Destiny have tested them in worst possible ways but the best thing about them is they rise above that to become better <3
Thank you so much for reading and commenting <3
Originally posted by: Nikki_love
😭😭😭 Mishti what are you made of?? Loosing your child like that, not knowing about the preg ...that's like death! And you put up a brave front. Just for Abir! The love is really truly one of a kind.
MishBir should not have to go through this pain of loosing their first child....I mean WHY the F**"
Mish should have atleast spoken or told her BM...she would have been the best support when Abir was incapacitated. You can't do it all on your own Everytime.
Shona...again again again heart touching gut wrenching story. You got all the emotions on the spot.
Kudos...looking forward to read what exactly happened and who was responsible.
Heeyyyaa Diiii!!
I will try to cover Mishti's POV on that in the upcoming episodes. I have tried to make sure I keep it realistic. Hopefully it makes sense once I cover that POV of hers <3
I am glad you liked it. Thank you always for reading, commenting and encouraging me <3
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