Why do Toshu and Paakhi hate Anupamaa so much ?

I don't really get why they are soo hateful towards their mother, she did do a lot for these two more than she ever did for Anuj or Aadhya, but they have made these two soo horrible towards their mother that it feels disturbing as a viewer, Anupama has a lot of faults but I don't think its fair that she gets treated this way, if Kavya ir Kinjal behaved like this it would still make a lot more sense...

They are just jerks and fickle who hate and love her as per convenience. They have no underlying issues like Adhya. If Anupamaa becomes rich, they will wag their tails around her again and abandon Vanraj, and forget all the so-called injustices they blame her for.

They do face karma but Maa ki Mamta saves them everytime which is why their attitude keeps getting worse. Vanraj knows they are pathetic but he is afraid of being left alone and tries to keep people around using money.

Depends on the writers .

I believe they desperately want to show anupama as bechari

Originally posted by: 123ab

I don't really get why they are soo hateful towards their mother, she did do a lot for these two more than she ever did for Anuj or Aadhya, but they have made these two soo horrible towards their mother that it feels disturbing as a viewer, Anupama has a lot of faults but I don't think its fair that she gets treated this way, if Kavya ir Kinjal behaved like this it would still make a lot more sense...

This happens in real life too, if a parent is a doormat, is never strict with their kids, treats grown up kids like babies and interferes in their lives even after they grow up, the kids lose all respect for them and take them for granted.

Basically it's the opposite problem of what she did with Aadhya, there she completed neglected and ignored the kid, here she gives too much attention and love. A good mother is in between both.

Dekho baat hain badi simple:

Jiss age me bachchon ko sudhaarne sakte the, kiya nahin. Jab power mili, mauka mila toh un bachchon ko sudhaarne ke badle unke hi validation paane ke liye unke jayaz-najayaz maange maanti rahi, unki zindagi me ghusi rahi aur unki galatiyon ko badtameeziyon nazarandaaaz karti rahi kiye ke anjaam se bachaati rahi. Bade bachchon ko apni galati ki zimmedari uthane nahin di.

There is a Kannada serial called "Bhagya Lakshmi" (being re-made in Hindi as MangalLakshmi) having a similar situation of a kam padhi-likhi Maa and young kids pampered by the father and almost turning brattish, where the mother-in-law calls out the daughter-in-law that ALL said and done, they are your kids and you HAVE to straighten them up. None will respect you if you dont respect yourself and if one doesn't get it naturally, demand it and make sure your worth is known and the woman does it! The kids are straightened and dare not misbehave.

Kehne ka matlab yeh hain, Jo baat saas ne bahu ko batai thi, wahi baat Kanta ne Anupama ko bhi samjhai thi but uske liye toh bade = Leela-Hansmukh. Ab bhugto.

The objective of the show is simple : Whether Anupama is right or wrong, other characters, including her kids, will hate or curse her. Even in RS's other show, someone or the other will curse the FL, even if she may be right.

RS's twisted definition of women empowerment is a female who keeps serving her abusers, neglects the ones who love her, and never makes a genuine effort to grow or sustain her career.

Also, show supporters should understand one thing..an empowered person never comes off as helpless. When you are around such people in real life, regardless of their gender, education, profession, or background, you also develop the strength to solve life problems with courage. They give vibes of a strong personality, not like Anupama.

Originally posted by: 123ab

I don't really get why they are soo hateful towards their mother, she did do a lot for these two more than she ever did for Anuj or Aadhya, but they have made these two soo horrible towards their mother that it feels disturbing as a viewer, Anupama has a lot of faults but I don't think its fair that she gets treated this way, if Kavya ir Kinjal behaved like this it would still make a lot more sense...

Because Vanraj always used to support them making fun of their mother when Anu was married to Vanraj. He never stopped them but instead used to enjoy whenever they were mean to her. A dad's responsibility is to make sure kids respect their mother just how Anu made sure her kids respect their father. Kids learn from elders. Even Baa used to insult Anu and the kids just got a free pass because noone corrected them.

On a lighter note, I have started disliking Anupamaa too. Toshu and Pakhi are selfish on the face currently like Vanraj whereas Anupamaa is double faced. She gives a lot of morality lectures but never ends up following them and after a while Toshu and Pakhi seemed to have seen through this hypocrisy and lost respect for her.

Seriously, what everyone has written above is true. They don't like Vanraj either IMO, it's just that he favours them and is more powerful than Anupamaa and them, so they behave better with him.

Misogyny is a thing lol. Women in patriarchal societies have power through men. Leela has power through Hansmukh and Vanraj. Ideally in a patriarchal setting, Anupamaa should have had power through Toshu and Samar even if not through Vanraj. I mean, she did have some power through Samar which is why she thought she could get away with slapping Dimpy. That's why Desi moms obsess over their adult sons romantic lives/marriages. It's about securing there own power and safety. It's a cycle of abuse perpetuated through generations and the only real benefactors are men.

Leela and Vanraj restricted her parental access and undermined her parental authority to the the eldest and younger kid, and Upma parentified Samar. Even for that matter; Malti devi did the same with Adhya.

Originally posted by: Blueeeee

Misogyny is a thing lol. Women in patriarchal societies have power through men. Leela has power through Hansmukh and Vanraj. Ideally in a patriarchal setting, Anupamaa should have had power through Toshu and Samar even if not through Vanraj. I mean, she did have some power through Samar which is why she thought she could get away with slapping Dimpy. That's why Desi moms obsess over their adult sons romantic lives/marriages. It's about securing there own power and safety. It's a cycle of abuse perpetuated through generations and the only real benefactors are men.

Leela and Vanraj restricted her parental access and undermined her parental authority to the the eldest and younger kid, and Upma parentified Samar. Even for that matter; Malti devi did the same with Adhya.

Problem was that she did get wealth and power. At that moment she could have used it. Her kids would have bowed down to her, she was literally one of the most powerful women in India. She could have used that power to help women in her family and outside.

However she squandered that power and ran back to her abusers. She chose to run away and lose power. Which is why she is one of the worst example of female leads who encourage misogyny.

She constantly says working women are bad, she constantly asks women to compromise their rights and happiness. She constantly says women need to sacrifice and keep working while men dont. She constantly encourages women to go back to their abusers and compromise. Every time she gains power and respect she leaves it and runs away and becomes a victim again. She wants to be a victim than be empowered.

She has done way more damage to women in her life than Baa or Vanraj and in Indians audience, particularly as she is the protagonist so audience blindly follow her. It's protagonist like her who spread misogyny in society, not obvious villains like Vanraj