Originally posted by: vibrantvibes
I just went through last night's discussion(I shouldn't have)and that losing parents on bday thing caught my attention. My bday is on 17th July and I lost my Dad on 17th of April, few yrs back.. since then this date haunts me like anything, a lil more than others bcuz its my birth date..Sabne samjhaya hain mujhe even proper therapy bhi try kari maine but trust me nothing worked. Log bolte the initially with time sab thik hoga but 3 yrs hone ko hain and this intensity is just not going away. My partner(well bf sounds weird to me as we're school classmates and family friends so gf bf equation is always secondary, its more like family thing with him) anyway he has tried his best after my Di(her points are diff so telling about him)to make me understand, he still keeps telling me ki ye baat dimag se nikalo, you're his(my dad's) lucky charm(he used to say that), he loved you the most,he wont like it if you keep aise low ye aise thoughts se..etc etc but this statement haunts me even more ki if I was lucky to him then how could he lose his life on my birth date.. I do celebrate my bday for mom, Di and specially for my nephew who's over excited for bdays but I can never feel alright on that date, I dunno if at all I'll be able to overcome this feeling.. I should stop mujhe subah subah rona nahi hain
P.S I dont wish to spoil atmosphere of AT.. I'll delete this later. Before that if mods delete, I wont mind..Let's continue discussing AA
Losing a parent is already hard enough, losing one on the date that resembles your birthdate is harder I must say. I don't know whether it will be okay for you few years down the line, but give yourself a break. It's not your fault or it's not uncommon to feel that way. If you don't feel good, then it's okay. It is not compulsory to be happy on your birthday.
Remember your father like how he used to live, how he used to shower his affection on you. Focus on good memories. Focus on being happy on those 364 days and I am sure you won't need to force yourself to be happy on 17th.
P.S. If you want to cry, go ahead. We are here..
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