Anokhi Bhalla: A Woman of Substance.

AK_2010 thumbnail
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Posted: 3 years ago
#1

Making this post in honor of our brave and enduring Anokhi Bhalla. A woman who fought for her rights, her dreams and most importantly... HERSELF. And is continuing to do so! 👏

Saw many comments and posts on IF, Insta and Twitter bashing Anokhi for 'giving up' and not trusting Shaurya and I was forced to think over it and this is what I came up with.

If you are starting to read this post with a pre-conceived opinion that Anokhi is being crazy and Oh! I feel so sorry for Shaurya... Please stop here and don't go ahead with the post.

In my Episode 109 Analysis, I said that nobody is wrong and I stick to it.


We need to understand that Anokhi and Shaurya come two different backgrounds, raised in two different environments and have two different issues to resolve. They are two SEPRATE people.

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"Falane ki Beti - Dimkane ki Patni Hone se Pehle, Mai Anokhi Hu!"

Anokhi has been taught that her boundaries end at the threshold of the kitchen and her identity- tied down to a man as his wife, later as the mother of his children. But it's not important that all lessons teach you the right thing.

Anokhi has grown up believing that sky is the limit. Given the opportunity, she can be the bird that can achieve the heights that are only defined for a man in the patriarchal society we live in.

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It might be a last moment decision for her, but Anokhi has always dreamed of this day. The bird flying away from the cage.

When a bird is kept in a cage, she has the optimum level security of knowing that she will be provided with food, will have a shelter and is away from harm's way. Yes, she may not be able to touch the sky but what if the bird loves the security more than the feeling of wind between the feathers?

When a girl has to go away from home, no matter how much you hate the walls and people living within those walls, it is never easy to leave it all behind. Anokhi decided that emotional and financial security was not worth it if she had to marry a man who would not respect her as an individual.

She loved her Mummyji and Papaji, but she knew she was better off without them for a while. Away from restrains of their society and away from her father's abuse.


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Once in Chandigarh, Anokhi grew out of that phase where things were just black or white... She knows somethings are just grey. That is Shaurya for her.

She has seen his best qualities: A good professor, a fair, brave and responsible man, a man who is ready to accept his faults and a man who has protected her.

But she has also seen his worst: Anger, Resentment, Ego and even his outright crass behavior.

Anokhi has forgiven him for his worst and fallen in love with his best. They fought each other, blamed each other and tried to stay out of each other's way but their connection is soul deep and not just that of materials and superficial appearances.


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The kind of environment she grew up in won't let her over look Shaurya's expectations from his wife.

Because it has never been about love. It is about respect. She was ready to sacrifice her supreme quality education at SIAC and settle with a small college in Kapurthala because she didn't feel respected. Image

Anokhi has never been the one to compromise with her dignity. She is not apologetic for making her own decisions. This is about her entire life, after all. She knows being independent will give her the voice and a position of respect in a relationship.

And EVERY woman should be empowered by her own financial independence!


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"Mera sach kya hoga yeh mai khud decide karungi."

She defended him and stood her ground in front of Shagun, not letting her see the uncertainty she had sowed in Anokhi's mind.

But that does not mean Anokhi wasn't affected.

She defended him because she wasn't convinced that Shaurya, the man who always encouraged her and was proud of her achievements could ask Shagun to give up her studies for marriage.


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Please know that Babli's "Sare mard ek jaise hote hai."

and

Anokhi's "Mr. Shaurya Sabherwal ke mann mei kisi bhi aurat ke liye izzat nahi hai." are two different things and we need to understand why.

Babli says it over and over again with her own experience, knowing that her father and husband do not respect her AT ALL and have not qualms beating her up when she steps out of the line.

Anokhi's words are slightly different because she is talking about herself as an individual. She was her father's burden while her brother was the investment. With Shaurya, she knows that he respects her as person, but now the question has raised if he respects her as an INDIVIDUAL?

An individual who as her own personal goals apart from the traditional family goals a woman is expected to have and care about. Does Shaurya respect Anokhi's choices? Does he care about her wants and dreams?

She is by no means comparing her father/brother/B-I-L with Shaurya in terms of abuse.


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"Pyaar ke naam pe samjhauta mat karna"

She is not denying her love for him, neither is she doubting his love for her. But she has decided to not give up on her dreams for love.

NO MATTER WHAT, HER DREAMS AND AMBITIONS WON'T BE SACRIFICED FOR ANYTHING OR ANYONE.

We need to see where her words come from.

Anokhi has seen women around her being abused physically and emotionally, women putting up with such torture because they think they have no choice!

But Anokhi is not going to put herself in that position. She is giving herself a choice! She has left her home, her sister is hoping to escape her hell of a marriage once Anokhi is independant, she wants to stand up for her mother, but most of all... She wants to prove that she is destined for more than just cooking in the kitchen and bearing some man's children.

And if a housewife is what Mr. Shaurya Sabherwal wants, then that housewife won't be me - this is Anokhi's resolve.


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Honestly, Anokhi has every reason to make a pre-determined choice about this. She is NOT taking this decision based on Shagun's words at all, she has made this decision after confirming the facts. It is a valid question, if Shagun was dumped after being in a relationship for over 2 years, what is so different about her?

This is not her being fearsome, it's her being CAUTIOUS. There is a difference.

Over all of that, ANOKHI BHALLA IS NOT WRONG FOR CHOOSING HERSELF OVER A MAN.

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I think sometimes we are so focused about who is right and who is wrong, that we forget there could be middle ground. Maybe we should start over and think of Shaurya and Anokhi as individuals and not just as a pair. We should remind ourselves about their individuality.

This entire track is not just about ShaKhi as a couple.... It is about Anokhi and Shaurya as individuals and their individual choices.

This is not about trust, it is about strength.

This track is not about Anokhi's love, it's about her aspirations.

It's not about Shaurya's love winning her over, it is about his own deep rooted insecurities.


Her trauma and goals against his insecurities and ideology, who is right?

I would say none!

Both have their own reasons to believe what is right for them.


This is the concept I signed up for! A woman who knows what matters to her. Anokhi Bhalla is a woman of substance and all those young girls out there should learn from her! I hope I can be half the woman she is in my life time. Personally, I want to fall at Anokhi's feet and hail her fortitude that she is not the typical ITV FL who is ready to give up on her vision on her own life for momentary happiness.

Yep, trust me... The happiness of being able to be with your loved one after making such life changing sacrifices (like compromising on self-respect) lasts only for so long. When the excitement of new found love fades away and reality settles in, one will realize that maybe the sacrifice was not really worth it.

I have seen it happen with my own eyes and I have been warned of same.

My own mother tells me , "Tu khud se paise kamane lag jaa phir tu jisko utha ke layegi, usse shaadi karayenge teri."

Because the harsh reality for women is that Pyaar Hi Sab Kuch Nahi Hota. Izzat aur Barabari bhi Zaruri Hai.

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wamavasant thumbnail
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Posted: 3 years ago
#2

UNRES....

You have beautifully penned down every thought which i had regarding anokhi.

👏👏


I remember the very first scene of the show which was a dream sequence where anokhi is running on the station to catch the train and finally catches it. Its etched in my memory forever i keep going back to that scene and to me it holds so much significance. That scene narrated the story of her great escape in advance. How she always wanted to spread her wings and feel the wind beneath. No matter how strong the wind gets she was never afraid to fly away. She did the same when she escaped from the marriage she knew running away from her so called family to a new place without any support would never be easy still she had courage to do that , courage to take back controls of her life and fly away.

She was strong in her moments of sadness as well. With time she has become more brave. She has courage to love someone , accept it and make decision to live with the same love in her heart without any expectation but also not to give up on her dreams and her self respect.


I remember the debate speech and i have never heard such a speech on women empowernment. Every line she spoke was eye opening i got goosebumps listening to her speech. It was just not a speech but her experiences.

Humari society mein agyakari ek sabse bada title hai jo ek aurat ko milta hai kyunki bahu ho ya beti use humesha ek admi ka kehna manna padta hai.

It was her experience, to her father she never was an agyakari beti she is a rebel. She was a free bird even in her moments of captivity because her spirit was free. She never sought permission from anybody to choose what was right for her.

From then to now she still possess the aura of that uniqueness. Even now when she refuse to get jealous over her love getting engaged to someone else. Who says she doesn't trust shaurya she trusts him but also acknowledges their difference of mentality, personality and everything. Its fine if she doesnt want to risk her future especially her self respect for her love.


There are many more incidents where we can see anokhi's anokhapan and you have written it all so nicely.

This post was really needed love you for this... ❤️

Edited by wamavasant - 3 years ago
deepshiii thumbnail
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Posted: 3 years ago
#3

Res

~~~~~

Akshu, you always bring us with the best reads and amazing analysis I swear. I had been writing for a long time on Anokhi but I trashed it all 4 days ago because I was very confused and now that I read this thread I understood things more clearly and I do have 2 of my points from that post I wanted to make🙈


Anokhi, a girl barely 20 years old with a passion and fire to fulfill her dreams. A girl who’s as unique as her name. The girl in all terms is Jugni, the spirit of life. I stumbled on this show and got connected to it to another level.


I love how she respects her own self and fights for her own rights. She went against her own father because she knew whatever he’s doing is not right. People (audience) did pointed fingers at this behaviour of Anokhi who spoke back to her father but the girl did exactly what was right. She for once was ready to give up on her because she didn’t want her mother to suffer because of her. The girl loves her mother more than her dreams but she also wants to be well educated and free her mother and her sister from the clutches of the men in their life who’ve made their lives miserable, who treats them like a puppet.


My views on the following:

"Falane ki Beti - Dimkane ki Patni Hone se Pehle, Mai Anokhi Hu!"

Makes me remember the goosebumps I got when I heard this speech, tears brimming down my face and the pride I felt after listening to this speech because my girl spoke the unfiltered truth. Her stand was strong. She never backed up. Also, I recall it clearly that she mentioned ki Main udd jaungi ek din yahan se to her dad. The girl has always been clear about her goals. Anokhi can do 10 wrong things but the one right thing she does always is overpowering to me than her 10 wrongs. I’m not biased towards Anokhi. I love Shaurya way too much but with Anokhi, I connect. I love her for who she is. She represents so many of the females of our society but our girl is fearless. She’s Sher puttar.

When I was Anokhi’s age, I wish I had this sense of judgement and fearlessness and I would have conquered more than I have now. She’s literally so matured and it’s never a bad thing. Maturity comes with experience. She has had the worst experience at her own place. The Bhalla men portray the men of our society who think it’s very manly of them to raise hands on their daughters and wife and to keep them in control. It pains my heart that some of us fight through it and get above it while most of us are still victims of this unwanted abuse. Anokhi had thought at least Raja would help her but well, that guy is such a chameleon. I would not shy away from calling him spineless. Also, I can never forget how he is saved by his father but Anokhi agar same attempt to murder karti toh? Phir kya karte Mr Bhalla?


I was very glad that Anokhi came out of the mess but little did she know, she would be trapped in a bigger mess. The mess that would turn her entire life upside down. But we always, always have light at the end of the tunnel. To her, the light at the end of the tunnel was Shaurya Sabherwal. I always feel that this line is very apt for these two too "Nafrat pass aane naa de, Mohabbat durr jaane naa de" Shaurya out righteously hated Anokhi, for reasons now clearly known but he always has had a soft side for her. Addressing how Anokhi fell in love (she still isn’t in love though as per me) or was attracted as this has become a topic of debate across places.

So, I did put myself into Anokhi’s shoes to understand how she got attracted and had this perspective of the whole situation. Anokhi was in a grave trouble and someone who hates her to death saves her and is concerned about her way too much. He helps her out of the mess and shows trust in her. Trust is beyond everything. The V-Day dance, all the unwanted encounters, saving from goons, riots, bridge scene or maybe finding Aastha. There have been plenty of moments when these two had to be together unwantedly and surely, these two babies were a mess and they did always cross the boundaries of professional and entered into personal spaces. I still do not define hers to be love. For me, it’s still infatuation or mere attraction which would turn into deep love soon.


But the fact and why I appreciate Anokhi is this "Because it has never been about love. It is about respect. She was ready to sacrifice her supreme quality education at SIAC and settle with a small college in Kapurthala because she didn't feel respected."

The girl just doesn’t know how to compromise and obviously there’s nothing beyond self respect. Until she respects herself enough, love means nothing. She trusts Shaurya. She respects him but what’s confusing her and irking her are his thoughts and his mindset of Women should be confined to the walls of the house and should raise children and look after the grown up baby husband. Call her a feminist or whatever but I see her as a woman who’s come so far to become something and not to settle for someone who owns such a thinking. The girl has just come across the manipulative half baked truth and is totally confused. Trust me, main bhi hoti agar Anokhi ki jagah, mere saath bhi yeh hi hota. Mujhe bhi mahi samajh aata itna jaldi cheezein aur mujhe bhi waqt chahiye hota hai khud ko sambhalne ka, situation ko samajhne ka and I prefer staying away from the person who puts me into such a spot because the more you talk, the more the mess. Remember Anokhi said dil pe zor nahi par dimaag pe toh hai. This is exactly what I mean by it. It’s tough to keep our heart in control but the mind is something we can control. It’s the mind majorly that helps us take rational decisions. Emotional hoke dil se faisle leke pachtate hue dekha hai maine logon ko. I have been one of those people too. I regret it till date because The heart says yay, the mind says nay. I am completely okay with Anokhi avoiding Shaurya until she calms her mind but not listening to him would mess things up for her. It’s him who can clear things to her and provide her clarity. Giving up just like that would cause her inevitable pain.

Anokhi is young and may not have an experience of love and is allowed to make mistakes but I really do believe that Anokhi is highly confused of her feelings now and is very scared. Thanks to Chamkili who poisoned her mind but now, she’d be able to understand Shaurya better, would pave way and choose the wise path and select the right option for her because I know ANOKHI WILL NOT COMPROMISE WITH HER DREAMS FOR LOVE. Love can wait but your dreams can’t and that’s what I think is the view of Anokhi making her Anokhi in all senses.



Akshu, all my love to you. What an amazing analysis. Bookmarking it so that I can read it time and again❤️Thank you so much for writing this beautiful thread on our Jugni🤗This girl inspires me a lot. She is the first FL who in all terms is very inspiring and knows how to stand her ground without any drama. Hum log hamesha KV ke liye kehte hai usne jaan daaldi Shaurya Sabherwal mein, but I would also like to say, Deba is in all terms the only actress who could have done this role. This girl deserves everything 💓✨

Edited by deepshiii - 3 years ago
Jiggy7 thumbnail
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Posted: 3 years ago
#4

Akshu, Thank you for writing it for us..

Yes, I would want to see Shakhi together at the end of the day but it's not Anokhi's job to fight Shaurya's insecurities.. It's not love if Anokhi gives up her dreams to provide security to Shaurya..

We may be sympathising with SS because of his traumatic childhood or KV's acting, but AB deserves the same sympathy and support if not more for facing her own challenging situations and not giving up.. We can't question her feelings just because she isn't breaking down already..

She has shown her grit and perseverance when she didn't cry and breakdown after the kidnapping attempt on her.. She stood her ground and explained her point to SS.. This is the woman we had been promised, we had fallen in love with and we are getting.. She doesn't love any less but she doesn't let situations or persons not even her own self cloud her vision, her aspirations, her understanding, her logic or her expectations..

She hasn't given up on SS, but she may have given up on relationship with a man she thinks will not respect her.. She has been emotionally and mentally abused in the past few days but she hasn't broken down.. She deserves assurance, deserves clarity from the man who loves her regarding her choices and dreams.. Because at the end of the day how can you believe someone loves you when he doesn't love all your shades!! How do you believe that a man loves you if he doesn't stand by you while you win the world?? How do you love a person who wants to subdue your own basic self?? How can a man who loves you not love your dreams as well!!!

Edited by Jiggy7 - 3 years ago
ashwariya_98 thumbnail
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Posted: 3 years ago
#5

First of all, I would really want to appreciate you for this wonderful post. Its so well written and presentated.

And honestly , A BIG THANK YOU, for making this post. It was the need of the hour. With so much bashing goimg around for Anokhi, I really needed someone to come out and voice the feelings of her character!

Anokhi Bhalla is indeed Anokhi and is just taking a stand for her respect, for her dreams and we love her for that.

Everything u mentioned is on point yaar! ❤️

Also, I would like to add one point, We always forget how Anokhi keeps saying that she loses her control when she's with Shauyra. She said this to Shauyra on his face. She mentioned it to Babli when Babli asked her back out during Holi too, she mentioned that she tried to keep away from him and avoid her feelings, but she isn't able to. She keeps saying that her heart loses its control around him. We all shouldn't foget that despite her coming to know that Shauyra had made Shagun choose between career and love, she still she can't control her heart around him, but she will control her mind. She knows her resolve gets weak around Shauyra and she wants to give in.

I appreciate her for being the lady she is.

Having said that, I also agree that she's not right in taking the decision regarding their relationship alone. She should talk to Shauyra. But then she is human. She will make mistakes. And She will learn slowly. It's fine. Its okay. ❤️


Thanks for the wonderful post again! ❤️

Nephy1 thumbnail
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Posted: 3 years ago
#6

Nice.❤️


As an individual I admire Anokhi,no doubt.

She is courageous and determined girl and if it was shown to be her story to touch sky despite love story I would have always vouched for her.


But being love story that is now downhill for me and it would be better that makers show them taking a break from each other for time being and deal with their expectations and insecurities without third party's interference on again acting as a mediator.

Thats all I want.

I don't want Anokhi to give up on her dreams neither I want shaurya to go behind her.

She has her insecurities,he has his own,neither hers are less nor his.

So let everything be equal.

Only one person can't be expected to resolve issues ,I don't want that burden on either Anokhi or Shaurya.

For me equality means equality in all respects,fields,situations.

mehr05 thumbnail
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Posted: 3 years ago
#7

First of all, thank you for this post. ❤️👍🏼

You are spot on in this analysis. 👏

I've always admired Anokhi since day 1. She is the epitome of the modern, new age girl who emerges from a modest family, fighting her own battles at each turn.

It took her huge courage, patience and perseverance to be where she is right now, n she still have a long way to go.

I'm in awe with Anokhi. She is sending strong messages, that too being on itv. Its a gust of fresh air. Something unique. She is unique!

Nan_ArHi thumbnail
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Posted: 3 years ago
#8

Unres


First of all, let me appreciate you on how beautiful you have written the whole write-up Your analysis of Anokhi's characters pretty much sums up what she has faced through to where she's now. To be honest, before reading this post, even I had felt that Anokhi's dialogues were self-contradictory and she's being inconsistent with her feelings although I do respect her decision of choosing her studies over Shaurya. But I still believe that she should have talked it out with Shaurya before moving away.

Anokhi grew up in a patriarchal house, like most women in India. She was expected to stay within the limits of family, get a degree and get married to a suitable suitor right away. But she differs from the rest and stands out because she wants to dream and fly towards it rather than staying in her comfort zone, living the life designed by the patriarchal society. Her fierce determination to run away from her forced marriage and come to a new city to live on her own, now that's something that always kept her going on. Her determination didn't break when she came to Chandigarh, waiting outside the college for hours, spending a night on her own in police station, getting accused of stealing, after the molestation fiasco until the library incident, after which she threw away everything, she has worked so hard for. But then she did come back stronger. She stood her ground and faced the challenges life threw at her. The grace with which she handled herself when BM announced Shaurya's engagement was something which still amazes me. Anokhi stands for everything she believes in.

But Anokhi’s whole falling in love, realization sequence was rushed unlike Shaurya where we get to see him realizing his feelings, fighting it with himself and accepting it too. So, I couldn’t connect with the idea that she loves him. I felt that Anokhi’s feelings are not as intense as Shaurya’s. Her past two weeks dialogues and actions were self-contradictory with her wanting to be with Shaurya, backing off from him, wanting to be with him, backing off from him, declining his love by distrusting him calling it game and revenge, then claiming that she trusts him, backs off from him again, then says she trusts him and love him and then back off again with no closure in between them. If they confronted it every time Anokhi stumbled then all these would be convincing. The last time she backed off, it’s justified that she decided her career over love.

I’m all for Anokhi choosing her career but I still do believe that she should have talked it out to Shaurya, listened to him first before making the decision of breaking whatever between them. Why? Because I have come across lot of relationships where problem arises when one person makes the choice for another person too and everything gets messed up. If Anokhi feels that Shaurya shouldn't be making her life choices then she shouldn't be making Shaurya's choices for him too. I mean today Shaurya said that ‘What happened with her was wrong. What that girl must be thinking of me?’ ‘I’ll talk to her on my own. That’s when I’ll get clarity’ when he talked with his family. He’s sure of what he feels and he’s staying true to his words. We are watching it. But Anokhi’s last part in today’s episode, where she spoke everything without confronting Shaurya, I felt that her words would have created more impact if she had actually spoke with Shaurya before deciding to give up (If he has opposed her in real), got a closure and then decide for herself rather than doing it for both of them. Just putting this one point forward because from my experience, that’s where a relationship always goes wrong.

P.S: Write an analysis on Shaurya based on today’s episode. I’m already excited.

Edited by Nan_ArHi - 3 years ago
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Posted: 3 years ago
#9

Originally posted by: ashwariya_98

First of all, I would really want to appreciate you for this wonderful post. Its so well written and presentated.

And honestly , A BIG THANK YOU, for making this post. It was the need of the hour. With so much bashing goimg around for Anokhi, I really needed someone to come out and voice the feelings of her character!

Anokhi Bhalla is indeed Anokhi and is just taking a stand for her respect, for her dreams and we love her for that.

Everything u mentioned is on point yaar! ❤️

Also, I would like to add one point, We always forget how Anokhi keeps saying that she loses her control when she's with Shauyra. She said this to Shauyra on his face. She mentioned it to Babli when Babli asked her back out during Holi too, she mentioned that she tried to keep away from him and avoid her feelings, but she isn't able to. She keeps saying that her heart loses its control around him. We all shouldn't foget that despite her coming to know that Shauyra had made Shagun choose between career and love, she still she can't control her heart around him, but she will control her mind. She knows her resolve gets weak around Shauyra and she wants to give in.

I appreciate her for being the lady she is.

Having said that, I also agree that she's not right in taking the decision regarding their relationship alone. She should talk to Shauyra. But then she is human. She will make mistakes. And She will learn slowly. It's fine. Its okay. ❤️


Thanks for the wonderful post again! ❤️

I agree with her getting scared that her heart might win over her mind on seeing Shaurya but she should know that her dreams too resides in her heard and that too way ahead of Shaurya, the decision she has taken now of choosing her dream over him is 💯% correct but I would have liked it better if she had done it after Shaurya asking her to choose him or dreams like he did with Shagun and she should trust herself that she can tell this to his face if needed to without any struggle b/w heart and brain coz like I said heart and brain both will be right in telling her to choose her dreams over everything, just wish she would have confronted him once.
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Posted: 3 years ago
#10

Res

Wow! Post Akshu

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