Part 26
“Only a set of pencils? That’s it?” Romi commented.
“Romi!” Vandu signalled towards an already irritated Shravu who wasn’t impressed at the Shuklas’ gift-giving ability. “No Shravu, these pencils are very nice. We’ll write them a thank you card too.”
“I’m just saying, they could’ve done better,” Romi shrugged.
“Shravu, dusre gifts kholo na?” Vandu encouraged.
Shravu went on to unwrap the rest of the gifts in the pile. Mihir and Mihika had gotten him a new set of red and blue swim gear including goggles, a swim cap, a snorkel set, and a kickboard. Romi and Rinki had pitched in together and gifted him a Batman themed wristwatch. Simi and Pulkit had given him a set of three race car themed jigsaw puzzles. Shravu loved it all. They were nearing the end of the pile, when Vandu noticed two different gifts from Ishita and Raman.
“Ishita, Raman, tum dono do alag gifts kyun laaye ho?” she asked as she stretched over and grabbed both packages.
“Arey Vandu, tumhari behen ka gift bahot boring tha. Isiliye maine ek aur exciting gift khareed liya. Tingu, tu khol ke dekh, tujhe kaunsa zyada pasand hai?” Raman said.
“Shravu ko mera gift zyada pasand aayega, dekhna,” Ishita interjected.
“Ab woh to waqt hi batayega.” Raman took a sip of his drink.
Shravu tore off the wrapping paper of Ishita’s gift and opened the box inside to reveal navy blue jeans and a red t-shirt with Marvel Avengers print.
“Wow Chitti! I love this! Thank you!” Shravu exclaimed and gave a big hug to Ishita. Ishita raised her eyebrow at Raman as a gesture of saying ‘told you so.’
“Ab mera gift dekh, Tingu.”
Shravu sat down again and now attended to Raman’s gift. He opened the box after tearing off the gift wrap and out came a stack of Marvel comic books and action figures of Captain America, Ironman, Hawkeye, Black Widow, Thor, Hulk, Loki, Spiderman, and Scarlet Witch. Ishita sighed. Raman won hands-down.
“Itne saare superheroes?! Thank you Chittappa!” Shravu ran over to Raman and almost toppled him over with the force of his hug.
“Accha yeh bata mujhe, tujhe aaj ke saare gifts mein se kaunsa sabse zyada pasand aaya?”
“Aapka! Aapka!”
Raman raised his hands having won the debate.
“Ek minute, ek minute,” Ishita stopped him. “Abhi bhi ek gift baaki hai, dekho.” She retrieved a box wrapped in red gift wrap that lay in the far corner of the living room. “Shravu, yeh gift bhi kholo,” she said, handing him the present.
Shravu opened it but what came out was disappointing to say the least. There were baby clothes, including a onesie, a bib, a hat, and socks.
“Yeh gift kisne diya?” Shravu asked. “Main koi baby thodi hoon?”
Vandu gasped. This wasn’t supposed to happen. She should've been more careful. She quickly grabbed the baby clothes from Shravu’s hands and stuffed them into the box again, trying to hide a massive goof-up.
“Yeh actually kisi aur ke liye hai. Maine liya tha kisi aur ke liye. Shravu ka nahi hain. Woh saara wrapping paper ek jaisa hai na, isiliye in gifts ke saath mix ho gaya hoga shayad,” she said quickly as she shoved the box into the nearest drawer.
“Aapne kiske liye liya hai Akka?” Mihika asked. “I can’t remember anyone who is having a baby in our family.”
“Woh… woh… actually it’s a lady at work. It’s for her,” Vandu said.
“Nahi akka, if it were for someone at work, you wouldn’t have been scrambling like that,” Ishita pointed out. “Bataiye na, kiske liye hai?”
“Actually Ishu…” Vandu looked over at Bala. There was no hiding this now. “It’s for Ragini. She just had a baby boy and they named him Varun.”
Ishita and Mihika suddenly went silent. The atmosphere in the room suddenly shifted from playful to serious.
“Who’s Ragini?” Raman asked, not having missed the sudden tension in the room.
“Ragini is Subbu’s wife. Varun is their son. He was born a few weeks ago,” Bala explained.
No wonder the vibe became so uncomfortable all of a sudden, Raman realized. Thankfully, Ruhi was already asleep on the couch and Shravu took his new toys inside to play with them. They would be spared from the awkwardness.
“I thought you guys broke off your relations with Subbu,” Raman said.
“These gifts are for a newborn baby, Raman. There is no reason to hold a grudge against him, is there?” Vandu asked. “We are not in touch with Subbu but we can certainly send warm wishes to the new mom and baby.”
“I think that’s a great idea, akka,” Ishita cut in. She didn’t want the evening to end on a bad note after such a fun party. “I hope both the mom and baby are healthy.”
Unfortunately, the vibe that was gone couldn’t be recreated again. It was getting late anyway, so everyone slowly excused themselves and took off.
………………………………………………………………………………………………………
Bhalla House - 10 pm
Ishita slumped on her couch and the tears she had held in from Vandu’s house flowed unabashedly now that she was alone. She was satisfied with her life now; after all, she had her Ruhi. But her heart still ached thinking that her ex had everything they dreamed of. Everything that she had dreamed of. Her infertility came back to the forefront of her mind and any power that she held over her insecurities vanished.
Meanwhile, Raman was on his way back from tucking Ruhi into bed. Ishita had been awfully quiet during the ride home and he didn’t have a good feeling about it. She must have been feeling a thousand things from betrayal to heartbreak to inadequacy, all feelings that he had battled for five long years. He recalled how supportive Ishita had been since their marriage; how only talking it out with her helped him move on. Now, it was his turn to return the favor.
As soon as he opened his bedroom door, he found Ishita sobbing on the couch, her head in her palms, and his heart lurched. Something monumental shifted inside him. He quietly set his coat on his bed and took a seat beside her. He didn’t know what to say, so he did what he could. He offered her a shoulder to cry on and an ear to listen. As he put his arm around her shoulders and rubbed her back, Ishita shed all her inhibitions. She leaned against his shoulder and cried her heart out.
“Feel better now?” Raman asked a few minutes later when her sobs subsided.
“Yeah, I’m sorry you had to see that,” Ishita said.
“It’s okay. Do you want to talk about it?”
“No.”
“You know, a wise woman once told me that I shouldn’t hold on to the past. Letting go and talking it out is a great way to heal.”
Ishita smiled as she wiped away her tears. “She sounds smart.”
“Sometimes she is. Other times she tends to forget her own advice.”
A stretch of silence lingered between them, as Ishita struggled to find words while Raman waited patiently to listen.
“Aap ko pata hai Subbu ne kitna time liya humara rishta todne mein?” Ishita began. Raman shook his head. “Saat ghante se kam. Woh dopahar ko mujhe bina bataye ek fertility specialist ke paas le gaya, jahan use pata chala ki main kabhi maa nahi sakti. Usi din, shaam ko usne hum dono ke parivaar ke saamne humara rishta tod diya. Just like that. It was finished. In the blink of an eye.”
“That’s really all it takes for life to change, isn’t it?” Raman recalled how Shagun had dropped the divorce papers in front of him, tearing his family apart forever. Yet, his mind lingered on Subbu's nonsensical behavior. Who in their right mind would worry about their fiancee's chances of conceiving instead of her health and recovery from a life-threatening surgery?
“I always told you not to isolate yourself, to mingle with your family, but the truth is, even I closed myself off in a way after that breakup,” Ishita confessed.
“At least you didn’t run away.”
“We changed entire cities, Raman. We came from Chennai to Delhi. How is that not running away?”
“I mean, at least you didn’t run from your family like I did.”
“I might as well have. I shoved my pain deep down somewhere even I couldn’t find it. I hid it from my family. I hid myself from them. It wasn’t that I didn’t want their help, it was just that… I..”
“It was easier for you to care for someone else than yourself.” Raman finished her sentence.
“What do you mean?”
“I mean, you’re a natural caregiver. In both your personal and professional life. You’re a dentist, and a pediatric dentist no less. Taking care of people and getting rid of their pain is what drives you. That’s why it’s so hard for you to put yourself before anyone else. That’s why, even though you were sick about a month ago, you wouldn’t rest until forced to. Being needed by someone else is what gives you purpose. That’s why Subbu leaving you hurts you so much. Because he didn’t need you anymore. Or rather because that’s all he needed you for, right?”
Ishita nodded. He had hit the nail right on the head. “He only needed me for a baby, when I thought he needed me for the woman I was. The moment he found out I couldn’t be a mother…”
“But you are a mother.”
“Thanks to Ruhi.”
“I meant you were always a mother. Even before Ruhi came into your life. It’s part of who you are.”
“What makes you say that?” Ishita gave Raman a look of bewilderment. “You didn’t even know me then.”
“I know you now, so I know who you are. Like I said, you’re a caregiver. And caregiving is what makes you a natural mother.”
“A natural mother who can’t conceive a child,” Ishita looked away and scoffed.
“Let me put it this way: your caregiving personality is why you were meant to be Ruhi’s mother. She wouldn’t be in your life if you would have married Subbu, would she?”
Ishita shook her head in the negative.
“Exactly. In fact, you should be happy he left you. That scumbag didn’t deserve you anyway.”
Although now that he came to think of it, did he deserve her?
“Come on, Jhansi ki Rani. Don’t let a man like him get to you. You’re an incredible woman. A superwoman, in fact,” Raman confessed.
“Yeh aap keh rahe hai?” Ishita was perplexed to hear Ravan Kumar say something so sweet. “Mazaak to nahi kar rahe na? Ya bas mujhe chup karaane ke liye bol rahe ho?”
Raman sighed, but it was too late. He had already let his guard down.
“Main koi mazaak nahi kar raha. Aur main sirf bolne ke khaatir nahi bol raha hoon. Sach keh raha hoon.” Raman bit his lower lip and rubbed his chin, looking for the right words to make his wife believe him. “Madrasan, tumne kabhi chaand ki khoobsurti ki misaalein suni hai?”
“Ab yeh kaunsa topic nikaal rahe ho?” she asked.
“Just humour me for a minute. Tumne suna hai na, log chaand ki khubsurti ki misaale dete hain. Right?”
“Haan suna hai,” Ishita said.
“Lekin logon ke kehne se woh khoobsurat nahi hota. Aur logon ke naa kehne se woh khoobsurat hona band bhi nahi ho jata. That’s what I mean when I say that you’re a superwoman. You’re an amazing, strong, incredible daughter, wife and mother. Just because I don’t say it often, doesn’t make it untrue.”
And finally, after what seemed like ages, Ishita let out a genuine laugh, and Raman felt his heart set into place again. But why did her tears affect him so much?
“Ab chal, apne aansu poch le. Tu lecture deti hui acchi lagti hai. Aise rote huye daraawni lagti hai,” Raman chuckled, earning a gentle smack on his upper arm.
Ishita took it as one of Raman’s teasing statements, but he meant it. Seeing her cry caused his insides to twist into shapes he never knew of. Seeing her in pain physically hurt him. One tear rolling down her cheek was enough to shift his world off its axis. That is when the momentous realization hit him: Ishita had grown so incredibly important to him. As important as any one of his family members.
Jab jab tere paas main aaya, Ik sukoon mila
Jise main tha bhoolta aaya, Wo wajood mila
Jab aaye mausam gham ke, Tujhe yaad kiya
Jab sehme tanhapan se, Tujhe yaad kiya
Hmm… dil… Sambhal ja zara
Phir mohabbat karne chala hai tu
Dil yahin ruk jaa zara
Phir mohabbat karne chala hai tu
With one last gentle reassuring rub on Ishita’s shoulder, Raman stood up and went to the bathroom to change into his night clothes. He had no idea what was going on. What he felt for Ishita was a lot more than mere care and concern. Unable to deal with the depth of his new feelings, he decided to take a cold shower and bury them all in a corner of his heart he couldn’t reach. This was dangerous territory. Raman would not admit it, because perhaps, he didn’t even know the truth himself. But the plain and simple reality was that Raman Bhalla was falling in love with his wife.
Kya hai yeh silsila
Janu naa, Main janu naa
Dil sambhal ja zara
Phir mohabbat karne chala hai tu
Dil yahin ruk ja zara
Phir mohabbat karne chala hai tu
Kuch bhi nahi Jab darmiyan
Phir kyun hai dil, tere hi khwaab bunta
Chaha ki de, tujhko bhula
Par yeh bhi mumkin ho na sakaa…
Kya hai yeh maamla, Janu naa
Main janu naa
Dil sambhal ja zara
Phir mohabbat karne chala hai tu
Dil yahin ruk ja zara
Phir mohabbat karne chala hai tu
Dil sambhal ja zara
Phir mohabbat karne chala hai tu
………………………………………………………………………………………………………
Ishita removed her night clothes from the cupboard and locked the bedroom door. She had heard the shower running, which meant she had an extra 15-20 minutes before Raman came back. The thought of her husband brought a gentle smile on her lips. He was… something else. A puzzle. An enigma. He had a thousand ways to annoy her, a million ways to push her buttons. But when he showed his gentle, caring side… Ishita sighed and closed her eyes. He could hide under his arrogant, rude alpha male act, but his true sweet nature always seeped through. She saw it in how he loved Ruhi; how selfless he was when it came to his parents and siblings; and how he cared for her too. She hoped that one day, he wouldn’t need that mask at all.
Kabhi neem neem
Kabhi shahad shahad
Kabhi naram naram
Kabhi sakht sakht
Kabhi neem neem
Kabhi shahad shahad
Kabhi naram naram
Kabhi sakht sakht
Mora piya…
Mora piya…
Mora piya…
A peculiar warmth spread through Ishita’s chest assuaging the pain of the night. It was a feeling that she did not recognize. For as fate would have it, Ishita Iyer… no Ishita Raman Bhalla was falling in love with her husband.
Nazron ke teer
Mai basa hai pyar
Jab bhi chala hai wo dil ke paar
Nazron ke teer
Mai basa hai pyar
Jab bhi chala hai wo dil ke paar
Lajja se mare re ye jiya
Piya, lajja se mare re yeh jiya
Piya re, lajja se mare re yeh jiya
………………………………………………………………………………………………………
comment:
p_commentcount