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A Mother's Lullaby~
Mere chanda mere nanhe, tujhe apne seene se kaise lagaau
A Soldier came and announced it loudly in pandavas camp Angraj Karna has been slained by Arjun. There was ecstatic environment around as the enemy commander had fallen , they all gathered around finally heaving a sigh of relief..Now the victory was certainly theirs. In a corner away from these celebrations, an elderly woman heard those very words which shook ground beneath her feet. She ran towards her tent and made sure she was alone. She asked guards to not allow anyone inside. He died.. words of that soldier still echoing in her mind..Tears refusing to hold much longer...they made their way out .. She recalled the day she held that little child just born in her hands...His small hands had touched her face.. He was smiling as if consoling his unwed mother at a time when she was in deepest delimma of her life.. But just looking at him ,she smiled through her tears, how beautiful he looked with those gold earrings and that gold armour on his body...his hair curled up ..he made a sound ..aa.. his voice had sounded like a melodious song.. Alas that sight was shortlived with her decision next moment... a decision that changed her and her child's destiny forever. She had given him away to his own destiny with her prayers for his well being. In a hope that he will make his way somehow in this harsh world... Dur jaana hai nanhe musaafir,
raaste mein kahi thak na jaana
Thaamke meri aahon ki dori,
dhund le tu hi apna thikaana
She died that day a little ..But she knew she had no choice but to seal her darkest secret forever in her heart. How many times she remembered her first born's face in her dreams...How many times she got worried ..What if someone didnt notice him at all...What if his destiny was so cruel that he could not make it at all.. She used to have nightmares of seeing that little one drowning in crying for help.. What had she done... How could she do that... She cursed herself many times..But then she got reminded always... Did she have a choice...Perhaps she did.. Alas! Only if she could realise it back then...
She came back to her present.. What had she done... She killed him that day itself... its just that news came right now... She looked at mirror in front.. She looked at that woman facing her from mirror.. How helpless she was back then...How helpless she is still now... Why could not she shout out aloud to this world...when her child came back to her... in need of support...in need of her hand...her blessings...and why this world chose to give him same treatment...her mother had given.. Why could they not show him that world is not cruel as he thinks.. Why she laments those people now...When she had failed him...
Aadmi bhi hai, bhagwaan bhi hai,
phir bhi phirta hai tu besahaara Kaun tujhko gale se lagaaye,
patharon ka hai yeh shehar saara
As those words thrown at him came haunting back to her ..She tried to cover her ears..like she did that day..but these voices were still audible... those cruel words still piercing her heart...
She wished she could that day..say it aloud... Stop it ..Stop All...He is my Son... He is my first born...He deserves respect of a warrior...Dont throw him away...He is royal born..my Karna...
He was my Son...
With those words aloud Kunti collapsed on floor like a lifeless body.. wanting to somehow reach her son Karna again.. but alas..She was too late...
(Song used above is one of my favorite lullaby from movie aakhrii khat.. )
A small part attempt to write from a mother's POV...even if she was wrong..we cant deny that she was his mother... Do let me know your feedback 😊
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