Originally posted by: --Arpita--
Happy to see you back...😊
But after completing this...then??
Sadie... Good to see you back...
If im not mistaken its not only Woh Actually thats incomplete...If you write, its totally of your own free will...
Originally posted by: --starstruck--
im going to be totally honest. after completing this it's bye bye IF! I'm not lying wen I say i cant sleep properly I need closure too! so after completing this I'll finally sleep peacefully 😆
when is the update coming melon
Recap - Zoya and Asad are childhood bestfriends who meet again after 20 years. Their first meet after so long starts with a fight and continues throughout however circumstances and Zoya's best friend's wedding brings them closer to each other until eventually they do realize they are in love however ghosts of their past torment them at every step that they take towards each other. Now you can read ahead😆
PART 18 - Reliving The Past!
They reached home in silence, no words exchanged between them anymore. Asad understood the gravity of the situation when Zoya's tone turned from playful to serious. He knew her parent's failed marriage had left her scarred and scared. His own parent's marriage wasn't a great role model for him but somehow, somewhere in between all their banter and fights he knew he had fallen in love. Love was a big thing for him, he knew Zoya was the one and there would be no other. He also knew he wanted to get married to Zoya, he wanted the whole deal - marriage, kids everything. Yes he was scared but he couldn't deny the fact that the thought of being bound to Zoya in the most sacred way was very endearing as well. He was a human after all, he wasn't white or black, like every other human he had his flaws, he had gray areas but at least he knew about his insecurities and he felt he could deal with them if he had his love with him at every step of life. He knew they would be there when one falters, when one makes a mistake. It is also true if their past was going to affect them, then it was going to affect them in a positive way; at least they know where their parents went wrong and can avoid the same decisions now that they know what the consequences would be. They'll be extra careful, extra vigilant to make sure their marriage never failed. But, how was he going to bring her out of shell? He knew he had to get Zoya to let her insecurities go, he had to help her to get rid of the demons of her past that still haunted her. And for that he had to talk to Dilshad! In all these years he never tried to inquire the complete story about Gafur uncle and Zainab aunty. As a child the secret was always kept hidden from him, as an adult he decided to let it go but now as a man deeply in love he wanted to know.
The roaring thunder and the pitter patter of rain falling on the window brought him out of his trance. He didn't know how long he sat on his settee but he had wasted a lot of time already, he needed to find his answers and he needed them now. He walked out of his room and saw his mother in the living room alone. Najma and Ayaan were out for the night and it was the perfect time to unravel the past with no disturbance.
He walked towards the couch and sat down beside Dilshad with his head on her lap. Dilshad smiled at her son and lovingly ran her fingers through his hair, her other hand tried to smooth the creases beginning to form on his forehead, he sometimes worked up himself too much, he needed to slow down and act his age at times. She could sense something was up with her son but she didn't want to force so she sat there, waiting patiently until she knew Asad was ready to speak whatever was in his mind.
"Ammi!" he sighed.
"Yes."
"I love Zoya."
"I know." She smiled at him.
"She loves me too."
"I know that too." He looked up at her surprised. Mothers and their uncanny ability to know their children inside out.
"She doesn't want to marry."
"Do you think I didn't figure that out by now?" she stopped massaging his scalp and motioned him to sit straight. "Asad you need to give her some time. She'll come around it."
"But I want to help her get rid of her insecurities." He sighed sadly.
"And you will do that beta, but you need patience. Trust me, I know you will help her let go off her baggage, everything happens at it's own time, rushing will lead you nowhere."
"Yes but I need to know something."
"What is it?" she asked curiously.
"What exactly happened that night that led Gafur uncle to do that?"
Dilshad's face turned serious. She didn't know how she would be able to tell him the entire truth. The truth had horrified her and disgusted her at the same time. She knew Asad would want to know the truth one day but now that the day has arrived she didn't know if she should tell him.
"Asad, beta, it's not my story to tell. Yes I know the events of that night but I really think you should talk to Zoya about it."
"Phupi is right Asad. I can tell you the truth much better than anyone else. The night is still clear and vivid in my memory. Nothing can make me forget that night Asad, nothing." There stood Zoya, tears brimmed her eyes and she closed her eyes as if to summon some inner strength. She felt someone squeeze her hand and opened her eyes to see Asad standing beside her. She had her greatest strength and she could do this. Dilshad moved upstairs toward her room to give them some privacy. These two had a lot to catch up on.
Asad made her sit on the couch and held her hand near his chest as he waited for her to be comfortable enough to speak. The rhythmic drumming of his heart against her hand worked like a charm in relaxing her. She had never talked about that night, she tried to turn away whenever it was mentioned. As a child when she didn't speak anything for two whole years after the event and her khala had sent her to several child psychologists she was still rigid in her decision of not mentioning a single word about that night. Everyone only knew the gist of what had happened behind closed doors that stormy night but she had seen everything happen in front of her own eyes. She took in a deep breath, closed her eyes and prayed to her ammi to give her the strength to narrate the dreaded night that changed her completely...
xxx
"Ammi please please pretty please with a cherry on top, can we eat now?" a little Zoya whined and pouted while staring at the delicacies laden in front of her. Zeenat was fuming in anger while her mother Zainab kept looking at the door frantically. Her children were hungry but she couldn't serve them just yet.
"Zoya haven't I told you countless times that if you be my sweet little girl who is very patient then Allah will reward you?" Zainab tried to pacify her daughter.
"Patience my foot!" Zeenat snorted. Zainab asked her to behave but Zeenat was having none of it.
"Ammi, why do we have to wait for that man? He clearly does not care whether his wife and daughters are starving or dying. He will only come once he is done with his tenth bottle of liquor."
"Zeenat keep you voice low, I have told you number of times to not say such things in front of Zoya. What impression of her abbu are you creating in front of the little girl?"
"Abbu is doing a fairly decent job in creating a modest image of himself in front of her, I don't have to do a thing." She crossed her arms and looked away. Zoya being only five was confused as always, all she knew was that she was hungry and the butter chicken in front of her was too tempting to wait.
"Ammi, can we eat now?"
"Just a little more time meri bacchi then your father will be home and we will have dinner together?"
By this time Zeenat had had enough. "You can wait for that man, I have clearly lost my appetite." She got up noisily and ran upstairs to lock herself in her room. Another night was going to go by with an empty stomach.
"Ammi my stomach is paining, I think I should go to sleep as well." Zoya said in a low voice, her eyes were full of tears which melted Zainab's heart. She couldn't let the apple of her eye go to sleep without a single morsel. Whenever Gaffur comes back she'd handle him, he could take out all his anger on not waiting for him for dinner on her but she will feed her Zoya first. She took hold of the knife and started cutting the chicken that she had so lovingly prepared for her daughters. Zoya had just taken a small bite of it when his father walked inside, his feet wobbly, hair messy and the shirt was buttoned up unevenly. One look at him and Zainab knew he was with one of his concubines and she looked away while she blinked her tears away.
Gafur staggered his way towards the dining table and flopped down on the chair while Zainab started serving him food. He rubbed his eyes to get a better view of them and once his vision cleared his eyes burned with pure unadulterated rage. He quickly got up from his seat and held Zainab roughly in his death grip. His eyes had turned red due to anger and she blanched under his stare.
"How dare you start eating without me. HOW DARE YOU, YOU BITCH!" the voice reverberated in the house. Zoya was stunned, the spoon dropped on the floor with a loud clank. Being just a baby she was always protected from Gafur's wrath either by her mother or sister, having to see it with her own eyes had shocked her to the core.
Zainab tried to get out of his grasp, he had been angry before but he was never this furious, she worried for her daughter and with her eyes asked her to go back to her room but Zoya was too stunned to react. Zainab hoped Zeenat hadn't heard him or she would say something to Gafur which would anger him more but luckily for her she was upstairs listening to some angry music that matched her emotions quite well.
"Gafur you are hurting me. Zoya is watching, what are you doing." She sobbed. His hold only grew tighter and cried out in pain.
"You think I'm a meaningless piece of shit, don't you. You ungrateful bitch, who gave you the right to start off dinner without me?" He pushed her on the chair forcefully and she ended up hurting her spine. She motioned Zoya to go upstairs but she stood there looking on.
"I'm going to teach you a lesson you will remember forever and then you will never dare to start dinner without me." He strangled her and she gasped for breath. With great difficulty she managed to push him off her but due to his drunken state he lost his balance and fell on the ground. This was the biggest insult to him. He stood up on his feet.
"Gafur the children were hungry, have some sympathy they are your own blood." Zainab cried and tried to run but Gafur caught her by her arm and dragged her back near the table.
"I'm going to teach you. I'm going to punish you. I'm going to teach you a lesson." He was blinded with rage, it was as if he had lost all his senses and turned into a monster. His conscience had left him at that moment, all his values, all his morals, his sense of right and wrong had abandoned him. In his fit of rage he grabbed the knife that Zainab used earlier to cut the chicken and stabbed her in the heart multiple times. He had become a soulless monster and nothing mattered to him as he continuously stabbed her. Her blood splattered everywhere on his face, shirt and the table. Zoya screamed out for her ammi in horror as she watched her own father mercilessly murder the centre of her universe. Her screams stopped Gafur and brought Zeenat out of her room. She clasped her hand over her mouth to stop herself from screaming out loud. She almost ran downstairs but immediately stopped as she noticed Gafur saunter towards Zoya with the bloodied knife in his hand and a crazed look on his face. Zoya's instincts kicked in and she ran towards the door. Gafur's inability to walk straight made him fall down and got her the time to run away. Zeenat noiselessly ran back to her room and locked her room, she rushed to drag the table and chair towards her room door to secure the latch. Once done she crumpled down near the bed and buried her head in her hands as she cried out for the mother she lost just because of a soulless father. She was stuck in this room with a murderer outside and she hoped Zoya could get in some help before she succumbed to the same fate as her mother.
Zoya ran barefoot uncaring about the stones and pebbles on her way that pricked her small innocent feet. Her vision blinded by the tears that made their way down, her vision blurred and she couldn't see but her feet automatically took her towards her Asad's home. She banged at the main door of Khan Villa continuously, her little hands hurt but she kept banging at it until someone, anyone would open it.
Rashid Dilshad and Asad immediately came out of their room as they heard the constant banging. Asad went and stood near Dilshad clutching her leg. She bent down and hugged Asad while she gestured Rashid to open the door. As soon as he opened the door Zoya rushed in and hugged his legs while crying inconsolably. Dilshad and Asad rushed towards her and her heart went out when she saw the state she was in. Her face was red, her eyes swollen as she cried and her feet bled from the places the pebbles dug into her soft skin. She immediately took her in her arms and whispered sweet nothings in her ears and patted her hair.
She made small soothing and kissing sounds along with a string of "mera baccha" to calm her down so that she could speak.
"Abbu...ammi...ammi died...ammiii!" was all she managed to say in between her sobs. Their eyes widened in shock and Rashid immediately walked out of the house knowing well enough Gafur's behaviour towards his family.
"Rashid please be careful." Dilshad said to him and he nodded. He had to reach the house fast before anything happened to Zainab or Zeenat. He gathered some of the neighbours and walked towards Gafur's house, all the while praying silently for everyone's wellbeing. He was aware about Gafur and his attitude, his wife beating habits and the domestic violence that Zainab faced everyday. Many a times he tried to report him to the police but Zainab's tears and promises stopped him. He hoped against hope that his worst fears wouldnt have materialized like this.
Dilshad took Zoya inside and tended to her wounds while Asad sat beside her to calm her down. She had tears in her eyes as she looked at her tender feet marred by several cuts, some deep some superficial. She did not have a daughter and always treated Zoya like one, it killed her to see her daughter in this state. She often shared her fears with Rashid about what if one day Gafur does something dramatic in his fit of rage and now she wished she hadn't thought of such a thing. Everytime she saw Zoya and Zeenat leave her house to go back home she stood at the door with a hand on her heart fearing about their safety. What could she do when their home was what they needed the most protection from. Home, the one thing that is supposed to be a person's safe abode was the most unsafe place for the three women. She wished she could adopt all three of them, oh how she wished she could!
Once Zoya had visibly calmed and the cuts on her feet were taken care off Dilshad paced around the living room frantically. She heard the sirens of the police car and ran towards the door. She was worried for her husband and came back to talk to Asad.
"Asad I'm going to go check on Rashid and Zeenat promise me you will take care of Zoya and you will not let her go anywhere until one of us is back." She gave instructions to him about Zoya and Ayaan who was sleeping upstairs and the little Asad nodded understanding fairly well the gravity of the situation. He was too small to understand everything but he was big enough to act like an adult during times like this. As soon as his mother walked out the door he helped Zoya walk towards his room and settled her on his bed comfortable. He ran towards his closet and removed a crystal ball sort of thing and came closer to Zoya.
"Zoya I'm going upstairs to check on Ayaan till that time just focus on this musical ball and the lovely couple inside."
Zoya stared at the couple standing arm in arm rotating in tune with the music, suddenly her entire demeanor changed, her body became stiff and she gave a disgusted look at the dancing couple as if they were mocking her. With a force Asad didn't know she possessed, she pushed his hand away and the music ball fell on the ground with a loud crash. He watched as his favorite toy crashed into a thousand tiny pieces, all that was left was the happy dancing couple, their smiles taunted her, their "love" disgusted her. But Asad didn't say a word, he didn't react at all, all he did was tuck her in and placed a soft kiss on her forehead as if to calm her anger down. He couldn't understand Zoya's reaction but he did not question her, he did not blame her, he did not irritate her like he would normally do. The situation wasn't normal and he had learnt how to alter his reactions to fit them in the scenarios. He moved to go upstairs to check up on Ayaan but was stopped by Zoya.
"Don't go, I'm scared!" she whimpered and he softly ran a hand through her hair.
"You know Ammi always says if you read kalma and blow around you then a farishta will come to protect you from all evil. C'mon close your eyes and read the kalma." She did as told and then opened her eyes to look at Asad.
"Asad can you stay till the farishta comes?"
"Ofcourse!"
"And when he comes can you send him to my ammi? She needs protection from that evil man." She whispered innocently and he silently cried for her.
"You know your ammi doesn't need a farishta anymore!" he explained.
"Why Asad? Abbu is evil!" she gasped.
"Because she is with a lot of farishtas now who are taking care of her and will make sure no harm comes her way anymore." His voice choked at the end. How was he to explain her that her ammi is no more. He simply left her hand and ran upstairs to quickly check up on Ayaan. On finding him fast asleep he adjusted his duvet and ran back to sit beside Zoya. He sat there dutifully beside her even after she was fast asleep and went outside only when he heard his ammi, abbu and a crying Zeenat aapi in the hall.
xxx
Zoya's face buried into his chest as she cried her heart out, tears rolled down Asad's cheeks too. It was too much for a five year old to witness her own father mercilessly murder her mother. Back then he hadn't known the entire truth, he didn't know what had happened in that house although he had accidently eavesdropped his parent's conversation about how his abbu had found Gafur uncle banging at Zeenat aapi's room door and it had taken a lot of struggle to get him out of the house. When aapi had come out she ran into his ammi and broke down completely near Zainab aunty's dead body. The following days Gafur had been sentenced a lifetime of prison on the basis of Zeenat and Rashid's statements because Zoya had completly walked inside a shell where voice neither went in nor came out. She was numb and lifeless as she stared into some far off space. She was numb to any kind of emotions. She was emotionless during her ammi's funeral, she was emotionless when Asad and Ayaan held onto her begging her khala to not take her away from them, she was emotionless for two whole years. And now as he looked at her he felt her tears were long overdue and he let her cry till her throat ran dry and she ended up coughing.
"Asad I was only hungry. I wanted food. Maybe I should've listened to my ammi, I should've been her sweet little girl so that Allah could reward me but I was a bad child and Allah punished me Asad, he took my ammi because I was being a bad girl." She sat down on the ground holding on to Asad's hand as if her life depended on it. He kneeled down beside her and wiped off the tears that ran down her cheeks uncontrollably.
"If... If I had gone to sleep with an empty stomach maybe my ammi would've been alive hai na?" she looked into his eyes with that same innocent expression she had 20 years back.
"Yes and she would've been living a miserable life with that sorry excuse of a man. She would still be enduring torture and violence and hurt. She would be living in a hell. Arent you glad she is safe now with so many farishtas looking after her?" he cooed at her just how he had 20 years back.
"I lost my Ammi and Abbu!" she whispered softly. He held her face in his hands and made her look at him. He rested his forehead on hers and spoke,
"Don't you consider my ammi as yours?"
"Yes!" came her immediate reply.
"And my abb- .." he trailed off, not being able to complete the sentence. That made Zoya forget about her misery for a while as she looked at Asad, pain and hurt etched on his face. His fists balled in anger and he badly wanted to punch something. She grabbed on to him and asked in a serious tone,
"Asad, where is Rashid uncle?"
XXX
A/N - Oh my God it feels so good to be able to update this FF finally! Most of you may have forgotten the story, lost interest! I completely get it, which is why I'm not demanding anything. A few likes and a few comments should do! I would've enjoyed this a heck more if it hadn't been such heavy duty update but oh well! Love you guys a lot and leave me some love in return too!
Love,
Sadie!😃
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