She felt distant. She felt emotionless. Her dreams were lost somewhere. Her hope was still cracked. She stared at the stainless off-white ceiling with empty eyes. Her eyes were rheumy and every breath felt like she was going to die the next moment. The only proof of aliveness came from the soothing smell of pristine new books and the subtle smell of new furniture. It gave her a sense of comfort, because she had always loved smelling those things. The light peeking in through the dark blue curtains let her know that the day was at its peak. The silence was disturbed by the low ringtone of her phone. She answered is without looking at it. A sense of relief washed over her when she heard her mother's voice. She also got a lecture for missing her meal. Before saying good-bye her mother convinced her to go out and get fresh air along with food. She freshened up, but she was still feeling fatigue. She took her wallet and got out of her room. She was walking down the hallway when her eyes fell on his picture. She stopped in her way.
She could still feel his eyes from last night. It seemed like he was staring right through her. She couldn't avert her eyes away from him. The emotions in his eyes were familiar to hers. She couldn't decipher his pain, but she could understand. The one emotion that she actually understood in his eyes was that he didn't really like her. She was slightly scared of it because she didn't want any more turmoil in her life. She had already lost enough. She couldn't afford to have a person telling her every single day that she was not needed there and her arrival had complicated his life.
There was a lopsided smile on his face in that picture and he was standing along with his father. The person in the picture seemed so different. Not that she had known him long enough, but still anyone could tell that it seemed as if there were two different people, but same face. She sighed and walked to kitchen. She looked around, but she didn't want to touch anything because she was already in his blacklist she didn't want to make him mad further. He lived on the twenty-third floor. The view of the beach on the one side of building was just as captivating as the nights were of the city, but it was day and the city seemed dull. She decided to walk down to the beach. She didn't realize it until she left the apartment complex that she didn't have the key or his number. She shook her head and just went on walking.
She felt soothing as her bare feet came in contact with the warm sand. She was surrounded by clusters of people, but still she felt disconnected from the world. She didn't understand the purpose of people getting attached to this life anymore. She was at the peak of happiness and all it took was death of her father to splinter her world in pieces. Even standing before the vast and beautifully colored ocean, she still felt like she was going to suffocate to death. Breathing was difficult for her. She couldn't understand what she wanted to do. She was trying to decipher her emotions, but they were getting messier with each second. For a second she wanted to just let herself wash away with those angry waves and then next moment she just wanted to lock herself until she found a way out of this misery. As the day started to get swallowed by the darkness, the only thing she understood was that happiness was a lost cause and "normal" was a concept that had disappeared from her life.
!💔!
The fear of death woke his conscious up when he stepped on the brake a second before his car could fly over the bridge. The sweat broke on his forehead as his breath became rigid. His heart beat wouldn't stop. The fear wasn't something he had experience before except the moment he almost went to jail, but this fear was far more worse than that. When he saw his car was about to hit the bridge boundary, he wanted to stop. He just couldn't choose dying no matter how bad his past had been. He put his hand over his heart and those heart beats only told him one thing that he wanted to live no matter how bad his life is. He parked his car and gulped. He thanked god for saving him by just one minute.
After the earlier rift with Maria, he left the office with only one thing in his mind, that if he ended up in a wreck he wouldn't mind because he didn't want to see her face, but unfortunately he had to see her god damn face every single day. But that moment on the bridge made him realize how precious his life was. He sighed and drove back towards his apartment.
He loosened his tie and fell on his bed. He couldn't get those feelings of fear from his mind. He knew they were going to be with him for a while. Maybe they are blessings in disguise he thought as he realized they made him care about his life. He closed his eyes and his entire life rolled in front of his eyes. He couldn't believe his thoughts. How could just one person push you to the limits, so much so that you are willing to let your life go? How could the world be so cruel? He was thankful for life, but still he was broken.
He didn't notice her until he opened the refrigerator to kill his hunger. There was no sign that someone had been moping around there. He became confused as he defrosted the chicken. Did she not eat or what? He checked the entire kitchen and there was no sign that she had messed around with anything. He sighed and irritation crept up to him. Now I have to baby sit her. He ruffled his hair as he stepped towards her room. No reply. Not even after so many knocks. I just hope she is not dead, rest she could go to hell and I wouldn't even care for the heck of it. Pushing the door open, his eyes widened. There was no sign of her. Where the heck did she go now? He face palmed and searched around the apartment.
He had been driving around the streets for two hours and the clock struck twelve. The shadows of night shot his fear up. The day couldn't have gotten any worse. There were all sorts of scary thoughts running around his mind. She was his responsibility given to him by his dad and he didn't even know if her life was in danger. Zain's heart was at the bursting point and there was no sign of Aaliya. Please don't let anything happen to her. After years of coldness, for once a sincere wish came from his heart.
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