About
That Night
Part 2
The
Past
It's
been 8 years since I've been here. Dehradun hasn't changed a bit it's the same
place. I'm standing in front of my house which I sold when I went to college.
The place looks the same except for my mom standing on the porch waiting for me
to return from school or my father tending to the garden. I sold the place to
the Dixits their son was my classmate although we were never close friends we
played for the school cricket team together. Mukund was a good friend of Madhu
though so we used to hang out together sometimes.
I ring
the doorbell of my house or Mukund's but it still feels like mine. The door
opens to reveal a small girl of about 4. She looks at me expectantly, and then
says "who are you?"
Okay
this was not something I expected I was in contact with Mukund but he never
said anything about getting married let alone a child.
"Um is
Mukund home?" I asked.
"Papa
someone's here for you" she shouts in such a loud voice that I cringe. This was
something I never dealt with since I was a single child and never around
children I was always confused about what to do with them, they looked so small
and sweet but they were absolute hell raiser at least that is what I heard from
my colleagues.
"Who
is it?" someone shouted from inside.
"Who
are you?" she asks me.
"Mukund
its Rishab" I shout.
"Come
on in" he replies in a shout.
I go
inside with the girl and I ask her, her name.
"Manvarnika
but people call me ika" she replies.
Mukund
comes in the living room and smiles at me. We talk for a minute catching up
with each other.
"Darling
come on how long will you take?" he shouts. I was quite curious to know who his
wife was because when I asked he had said "you'll see"
But I
was not prepared to see Deepali, I looked at the two in confusion they used to
hate each other's guts in school.
"Yeah
I know long story short we coincidentally went to the same college and since we
were at least familiar with each other we started hanging out then started
dating somehow, then I knocked her up so we got married but I'm glad you know I
couldn't have found a better girl in my life" Mukund says looking adoringly at
his wife.
"Rishab
I'm glad to see you, how are you?" Dips asked.
"I'm
fine but um I wanted to ask about Madhu, she is coming right?" I asked.
"Yeah
actually she was going to the party with us in our car but then she said she
was going with Sultan" Mukung replied.
"Sultan?"
I asked bewildered they barely knew each other in school.
"Yeah
they did their medical internship at the same place apparently they became
friends after that" Mukund said.
I was
a little angry and terrified not that I have any say in Madhu's life as to who
she makes friend with or who she doesn't but still I was angry.
We
went towards the school and dropped ika to her grandmother's place.
"I
know it's not right to ask but what happened between you two? I mean I'm seeing
you after 8 years but I met Madhu quite a few times in the past, she doesn't
look the same you know, her zeal for life, it's lost somewhere" Dips says in a
resigned tone.
I was
a sad to hear that I couldn't imagine her without her perpetual smile or her
mischievous eyes, what had I done?
"It's
just that I screwed up pretty bad I wrecked both our lives" I said upset.
"Yeah
but what happened?" Dips persisted
"Rishab
no need to answer that she is very nosy and you wife dearest don't pester him"
Mukund said.
I had
no intention of telling her but I remember what I did, we were in college it
had been two months since we joined I planned to visit Mudhu in October she was
in delhi while I was in Kolkata we kept contact and were still mad about each
other I visited her twice before. So we made plans of what to do in the
holidays. The thing was that even though we were dating but it was not the same
she was very busy with studies and when we talked on the phone it was fine but
when we didn't I felt sad and hollow. I started drinking again I was a little
out of control and sometimes I even did drugs but I never told Madhu my problem
in the aftermath of our finals in school she had helped me a lot and I had
recovered a lot from my addiction but it was coming back in college. I didn't
want to admit that I was weak and susceptible to addiction so I kept it a
secret from her. I was getting bad grades and I used to fight a lot with guys
for no reason at all. In short I was screwed up big time. I was in Kanpur for
sometime before Madhu's college holidays she stayed there with me too for a
weekend but went back on monday so I decided to drive to delhi. I was
frustrated and couldn't handle another moment without seeing her I was bruised
up from a fight so the doctor had given me some pills but I took a few more
than recommended. So I was fairly high and I had one too many bottles of booze.
When I reached her flat which she shared with Trishna her friend it was almost
midnight, I knocked on the door and Trishna opened it she let me in. She told
me that Madhu was not home she went to some friend's home to complete a project
I was exhausted so I planned to crash in Madhu's room and go searching for her
in the morning, I was going there when Trishna held my hand and stopped me, I
turned and on closer inspection it looked like she had been drinking too and
she looked very sad for some reason.
"What
happened?" I asked. The next thing I know she was kissing me and I was thinking
about the week I had spent with Madhu in Kanpur the things we had done, but
then some still sane part in me told me that it was Trishna not Madhu. I tried
to push her away but I was so tierd and exhausted.
The
next thing I remember was the stricken look on Madhu's face when she entered
her room. Trishna stood up from the bed in her disheveled clothes and wayward
hair. She looked at Madhu guiltily and went out of the room.
"How
could you? Rishab how could you?" She sobbed I went to her to soothe her, I was
very confused and hungover I couldn't remember a thing from last night.
Suddenly Madhu held up her hand and said "Stay away from me."
Then
she stopped crying and looked at me with hurt and angry eyes and said "get out
of here and my life Rishab"
I
wanted to beat myself to death for causing such pain to Madhu but right then I
knew I had to give her time and I decided to salvage the situation later. But
that was a big mistake because when I came back the next day I found she left
that place and she left medical school even, at that point I understood what I
had done the amount of pain that I have caused her that she left her dreams
behind. If I knew this I would have told her that she never had to see my face
again, she'll not have to face ever again. At least she could have gone on with
her life.
After
that I was like a living dead I was so lost that I hardly had any wishes left
to live, but I lived in the hope that someday I'll see her again at least from
afar. But I left drinking after that night it was hard to be lucid all the time
feel the pain but I did it anyway because I knew that I deserved it. Two years
later I somehow passed b.com. but by then I was a lot better and I did MBA with
a lot better grades and around that time I met Mukund he was on some business
trip and I was working for TCS we talked for hours and in that conversation I
got to know that Madhu was in Bangalore she had finished her studies and was
doing her internship, I was happy to hear that but I was not yet ready to meet
her I felt as if was not worthy yet. So I stayed away.
2
years later I still feel that I'm not worthy yet but I know that the love that
was there between us could not die so I had to convince her to come back to me.
I know it will take a lot of effort and I still didn't know how she will react
when she sees me but I know that somehow I'll get her back and prove my love.
The
car stopped in front of the school and I held my breath, this place contained
so many memories of me and Madhu that it was hard to breathe it was as if I
lived all those moments again, I wondered if she felt the same way when she
looked at the school.
We
entered the auditorium and my eyes were drawn to her like a magnet, I was lost
in her beauty, she looked like an angel tonight, her looks have matured she was
not rail thin like she used to be she had filled out and there was a glow in
her skin but there was something sad lurking in her eyes and that was what
upset me the most that sadness, that I had once promised never will be there,
was caused by me. Suddenly she started laughing at something and I forced my
eyes towards the man who made her laugh. It was Sultan.
READ THE NOTE ON PG 5
Edited by katrina_petrova - 11 years ago
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