Hey everyone! 🤗
Well my first ever OS!😃😳
I was in this really sad and depressed mood today and I ended up writing this. Hope it's good.
Please excuse any mistakes as I didn't check it cause I'm still a little sad. Hope its good enough.
I was lying on the chair with my legs resting on the table, with eyes closed.
"I love you" she whispered in my ears, encircling her arms around my neck. A smile played on my lips as I kept my hand atop of hers.
"I love you too" I whispered, pulling her closer to me. And when I opened my eyes, no one was there. I was all alone.
And then I realized it was another of my day dreams that I had been having from the past three years. From the day she left me.
He closed his eyes again and thought of the days when he had enjoyed his life the most or the only time when he enjoyed in his life.
He had fallen in love with her from the moment he laid his eyes on her for the first time. She was clad in a green Patiala suit, her hair braided in a plait resting on her left shoulder, her eyes twinkling with joy and excitement with a breath taking smile on her lips.
She was playing with those innocent little children.
Ever after his daadima passed away, he came to the orphanage every week to play with the kids. It was one place where he felt calm and happy.
When he came to the garden to play with the children, he saw a new face. He had never seen her before. He stood there watching her play with the kids. A smile played on his lips watching her play with the kids. After many years he had smiled whole heartedly.
"Maan bhaiya! Aap kab aye?" Pari came running towards him. She was his favorite. He loved her the most out of all the kids.
"Bas abhi aya" saying so he picked her up in his arms. And she kissed him on his cheeks.
He walked to the centre of the garden, seeing him all the kids stopped playing and ran up to meet him.
He put pari down and greeted all the kids.
And that's when SHE came walking towards him. He couldn't keep his gaze off her.
"So you are maan?" she asked him
Her voice was as sweet as sugar. He wanted to keep listening to her, but was brought of his trance when she called out again.
"These kids keep talking about you. The really love you a lot" she smiled while saying so.
He smiled back.
"By the way I'm geet. Geet handa. I just joined here. I look after them"
"Geet. Nice name" he thought.
******
He started to visit the orphanage daily after that day. A month had passed by this way and a day didn't go when he wouldn't see her or meet her. They had become good friends.
He had gone mad in her love. He couldn't stand any other guy talking to her or even next to her. He had started to become very possessive about her.
He was really shattered, when one day she told him of her plans of going to London and completing her degree.
******
They were sitting on the grass watching the kids play. Both had a smile on their face.
And then she became serious and said
"Maan……"
"Hmmm?" he asked still watching the kids play
There was silence for a while and then finally
"I like you" she spoke out without thinking.
He stopped smiling abruptly and looked at her. She stared into his eyes. She could see only love and love in those eyes. She felt she was drowning in those eyes. They kept staring at each other and then maan finally broke the eye contact and whispered
"But I don't like you geet……I love you"
She had tears running down her cheeks, and then she hugged him.
"I love you maan" she whispered in his ears.
******
"Maan I'll be leaving for London next month" she broke the news to him
From the day they confessed their feelings, maan had forgotten about everything else, even the fact that geet would be leaving to London soon. He had started to remain happy now.
But on hearing those words, hell broke loose on him. The smile that had been on his face since so many days disappeared and the spark in his eyes vanished. He slumped on the ground. He felt tears sting his eyes and a lump form in his throat. A small sob escaped his lips as tears ran down his cheeks.
Geet immediately sat beside him and wiped his tears and hugged him tight.
He didn't hug her back, just sat there as if he were lifeless. He stopped crying and got up and left from there.
She just sat there, knowing he needed some time and decided she would talk to him later.
******
"Maan…..please listen to me. I have to go. It was my parent's dream to complete my degree and become something in life. That was their last wish and….and I have to fulfill it" she managed to utter the last part without breaking down.
He knew she had to go but he didn't want to let her go. Whoever he loved dearly always ended up going away from him. He smiled at his cruel fate.
First he lost his parents in an accident.
Then his daadi died of a heart attack
And now geet was going away from him.
He certainly didn't want to lose her. No he couldn't!
"Please maan?" she pleaded.
******
They were at the airport holding hands, waiting for the announcement of her flight.
After sitting silently for about fifteen minutes, the announcement for her flight was made.
"Maan if my leaving from here hurts you so much…..it's…its better if we just break up, it will just end all the pain and th-"he silenced her with a small peck on her lips.
"Even thinking of life without you gives me so much pain and you are leaving me now, at least don't snatch those memories from me" he replied with tears swimming in his eyes, reflecting hurt and pain of separation.
She hugged him tightly.
"I don't know how I will live without you" she sobbed on his shoulder and he pated her back and reassured her
"Distance didn't matter between relations"
"Promise me you will call daily and stay in touch" he said with desperation in his voice. He needed assurance that nothing could separate them.
"I promise" she smiled through tears and left for the security check while he watched her retreating figure.
******
As promised she called him daily.
As days passed by she became busy with her studies and calls became less and irregular. She had started to call once in a week or sometimes once in two weeks.
As months passed by she hardly called. But maan waited patiently for her. As he had said distance didn't matter between relations, he tried to pacify himself that she was busy with studies.
A year had gone by since she gone to London. She had promised him that she would come for holidays, but she didn't come at the last moment.
Maan became a lifeless body after she left. He loaded himself with work to distract himself.
But he still waited for her to come.
And this is where he was now finally waiting for her to come back, but she never came back even after three years. He remembered the last time he spoke to her. It was one year four months back.
"Hi geet! Where have you been? You never take my calls!?" his voice was full of excitement
"Uh…maan you know honey I have been so busy with my studies…" she seemed least interested and distracted.
He couldn't hear her properly because of loud noises in the background.
"Oh maan I've got to go…some important work byee" and she hung up before he could even say anything.
And now sitting here thinking about those times and now, I realize that that I was wrong. Distance did matter between relations. But I still tried to pacify myself that no, I was not wrong, but every time she proved me wrong.
I still dream of us being together all day and having a life that many others only dreamed of. But when I wake up, the harsh reality hits me that now I'm one of those that only dream of that life.
Now my patience has started to die. I can't take this pain anymore. And even then I have these day-dreams
He opened his diary and penned down a letter for his geet
Geet,
My love. Today it has been exactly three years since you left to London. I still think that you would come back today and run up to me and hug me. But this never happens.
My patience has started to die now. I don't think my heart can bear anymore pain now.
But even if I wish to, I can't forget you, even though all you have been doing is causing me pain. But that's my love for you, but now I doubt if you ever understood my love.
Tune mere jaana Kabhi nahi jana
Ishq mera dard mera
Aashiq tera
Bheed mein khoya rehta hai
Jaane jahaan
Puchho toh itna kehta hai
That I feel so lonely
There's a better place from this emptiness
Since neither can I forget you nor stay without you any longer, I wish to end this useless life of mine which has no meaning without you. You came into my life as a ray of hope but the ray of hope had started to fade away since the day you went away and once again there is darkness in my life, which I can't bear anymore.
I love you!
I had, have and always will love you, even if I won't be alive anymore.
Maan Singh Khurana
*****************************
I know I should have continued a little bit more ahead, but as I said my mood is that of a depressed soul, so you can imagine of whatever happens next.
Do hit the like button and leave comments!😃😳
P.S- the Hindi part in the letter is from the song emptiness. And yes of course
that means I copied it. It fit that place perfectly.
Love
Navpreet
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