SS:StayingTogetherForMoreThanHalfAnHour(UpdP3 Pg7) - Page 4

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Infinitedreams thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
#31
πŸ‘ Really nice, and enjoyed reading, poor MaanEet, lot of restrictions, and morethan that they are monitoring them lolz...

Ok let me correct your urdu, mostly it's fine, but some words.....

You wrote "Ab mujhe aapki aadat padgayi hain aur aapki paas rehna meri zindagiki jaroorat bangayi hai. Aapke bina meri zindagi adhoori hain. Mein adhoori hoon."

I corrected "Ab mujhe aapki aadat padgayi hai, aur aapke saath rehna meri zindagi ki zaroorat bangayi hai. Aapke bina meri zindagi adhoori hai. Main adhoori hoon."

You wrote "Aap aane mein itna der kyu kurdiya?"

I corrected "Aap ne aane mein itni dair kyon kurdi?"

You wrote"Aaj Maan Singh Khuraana ko apnehi ghar mein apne hi mehbooba ko chori chori milna pad raha hain aur wuskeliye choron ki tarah apne hi kamre ki khidki ke baharwali pipe pakadke neeche aana pada."

I corrected ""Aaj Maan Singh Khurana ko apne hi ghar mein apni hi mehbooba se chori chori milna pad raha hai, aur uske liye choron ki tarah apne hi kamre ki khidki ke baharwale pipe ko pakadke neeche aana pada."

You wrote "Tho aaphi kahiyena - hum kal se kya kare?"

I corrected ""Toh aap hi kahiye na - hum kal se kya kare?"

You wrote "Dil ki baaton ko hoton se nahi kehte, yeh fasaana tho nigahon se baya hota hai. Aur in ankhon ki bhaasha hum dono se jyada koun jaanta hain."

I corrected "Dil ki baaton ko hoton se nahi kehte, yeh fasaana toh nigahon se bayan hota hai. Aur in ankhon ki bhaasha ko hum dono se zyada kaun jaanta hai."


You wrote "Agar bhai ko pata chala tho bahut gadbad hojaayega. Lagtha hai aap abhi tak bhai ko ache tarah nahi jaante." 

I corrected "Agar bhai ko pata chala toh bahut gadbad hojaayegi. Lagta hai aap abhi tak bhai ko ache tarah se nahi jaanti hain." 


You wrote ""Aise koi baat nahi"

I corrected "Aisi koi baat nahin hai"




Muniza
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Posted: 13 years ago
#32

Originally posted by: muniza75

πŸ‘ Really nice, and enjoyed reading, poor MaanEet, lot of restrictions, and morethan that they are monitoring them lolz...


Ok let me correct your urdu, mostly it's fine, but some words.....

You wrote "Ab mujhe aapki aadat padgayi hain aur aapki paas rehna meri zindagiki jaroorat bangayi hai. Aapke bina meri zindagi adhoori hain. Mein adhoori hoon."

I corrected "Ab mujhe aapki aadat padgayi hai, aur aapke saath rehna meri zindagi ki zaroorat bangayi hai. Aapke bina meri zindagi adhoori hai. Main adhoori hoon."

You wrote "Aap aane mein itna der kyu kurdiya?"

I corrected "Aap ne aane mein itni dair kyon kurdi?"

You wrote"Aaj Maan Singh Khuraana ko apnehi ghar mein apne hi mehbooba ko chori chori milna pad raha hain aur wuskeliye choron ki tarah apne hi kamre ki khidki ke baharwali pipe pakadke neeche aana pada."

I corrected ""Aaj Maan Singh Khurana ko apne hi ghar mein apni hi mehbooba se chori chori milna pad raha hai, aur uske liye choron ki tarah apne hi kamre ki khidki ke baharwale pipe ko pakadke neeche aana pada."

You wrote "Tho aaphi kahiyena - hum kal se kya kare?"

I corrected ""Toh aap hi kahiye na - hum kal se kya kare?"

You wrote "Dil ki baaton ko hoton se nahi kehte, yeh fasaana tho nigahon se baya hota hai. Aur in ankhon ki bhaasha hum dono se jyada koun jaanta hain."

I corrected "Dil ki baaton ko hoton se nahi kehte, yeh fasaana toh nigahon se bayan hota hai. Aur in ankhon ki bhaasha ko hum dono se zyada kaun jaanta hai."


You wrote "Agar bhai ko pata chala tho bahut gadbad hojaayega. Lagtha hai aap abhi tak bhai ko ache tarah nahi jaante." 

I corrected "Agar bhai ko pata chala toh bahut gadbad hojaayegi. Lagta hai aap abhi tak bhai ko ache tarah se nahi jaanti hain." 


You wrote ""Aise koi baat nahi"

I corrected "Aisi koi baat nahin hai"




Muniza



Thank you so much for the corrections. From next time onwards, if I use too many hindi or urdu words, I will get it screened by you before making my post. I have updated the post with the corrections. Now, it looks more clean.
sksg thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
#33
Aditi, there is now a new article claiming that Arjun will attempt to bankrupt Maan. So many points make me fear whether there will be a cut in time allotted for Maan's monkey tricks in order to see Geet Chupke Chupke. I really hope these moments, which have lot of scope for hilarity, do not get cut down.
nanditasingh thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
#34
Beautiful Sri..i'm so sorry dear my pm box is a total mess ..hence missed this post
love u
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Posted: 13 years ago
#35
Fantabulous FF!!!

Loved it!
sksg thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
#36

Originally posted by: nanditasingh

Beautiful Sri..i'm so sorry dear my pm box is a total mess ..hence missed this post
love u



No probs Nandu. Glad you found it in the end. Wait for the sequel, which is going to be penned by Dol.
Edited by sksg - 13 years ago
Posted: 13 years ago
#37
Part 2 πŸ˜›

"What!!!!" Maan asked as he stormed down the stairs.


The person at the other end mustered some courage and answered "Ji s-s-s-s-sir. Dadima ne subah ph-ph-phone kiya tha yeh kehne ke liye ki hum mein se kisi ko bhi oh-oh-office shift karne ki zaroorat nahi. Ab unka kaha hum kaise taal sakte hain?"


"Tumhara boss main hoon ki dadima? Tumhe naukri pe kisne rakha hai?" Maan asked as he resumed climbing down the remainder of the steps.

"Aa-a-a-aapne hain sir. L-l-lekin sir, dadima ne warning di hai ke agar hum wahan aaye toh humari khair nahi."

Maan had reached the bottom of the stairs and in front of dadima by the time Adi finished saying "I'm so-so-sorry sir." Dadima gave a smirk as Maan glared at her. He was so angry that he wanted to break something right then and there.

"Dadima yeh main kya sun raha hoon. Aapne staff ko aane se kyun roka?" Maan tried not to sound agitated with no success.

"Aap rules nahi modh sakte. Humne geet ko office jaane se isi liye roka tha taaki aap kaam ke bahane unse baat na kar sakein. Iska matlab yeh nahi ki aap ghar ko hi office bana lein. Rule toh rule hai. Aapko unhein follow karna hi padega. Ab aap jaldi jaiye, humein bhi shopping ke liye jaana hai."

Maan was silent and deep in thought for a few minutes. Finally a smile formed on his lips and he said
"Thik hai dadima. Main din ke kisi bhi samay Geet se aadhe ghante ke liye mil sakta hoon naa?"

"Haan"

"Toh thik hai. Main Geet se abhi milna chahta hoon."

"Kya?!? Soch lijiye. Aap isle baad Geet se phir kal tak nahi mil payenge."

"Haan dadima. Main jaanta hoon. Aap Geet ko bulwayiye."

Dadima was perplexed. She hesitantly asked Nakul to call Geet. She knew something was cooking in his mind but she couldn't do much at this point.

Geet was confused as well and kept looking at the time wondering why Maan was exhausting the entire time now but she decided to go with the flow. Anyway, she didn't have much control over things when Maan made a resolve to handle them himself. They sat together at breakfast and Maan thoroughly enjoyed the start of his day with his lady love. She was beautiful, but seeing her first thing in the morning added brightness to his day. After a few minutes Geet was smiling too assuring herself that after beginning the day with him, she was sure the rest of it would go smooth.

Dadima was keeping tabs at the time and before she could say another word about time being up, Maan got up and said "Mujhe pata hai time khatm ho gaya hai. Main jaa raha hoon. Bye Geet."

Dadima was shocked! She wondered if he had lost his mind or something. Not an extra second he wants to spend with Geet? This didn't sit well with her. She was now most certain something was cooking in Maan's mind. She closely noticed that although Geet was upset about his leaving, he showed no emotion. He quickly bid her good bye and made his way out. Dadima's eyes followed him till he went out of sight.

The whole day dadima was with Geet so she knew Maan hadn't called her nor tried anything else to get in touch with Geet. She kinda felt bad for Geet seeing her restlessness throughout the day. Dadima had thought of all possible ways to tackle him if he asked to have dinner with Geet. Maan at last called late evening only to say he won't be home in time for dinner as he was working till late. Dadima wasn't expecting this. Now all her plans were thrown out the window.

Once dinner was over and Geet had retired into the outhouse dadima stayed back in the hall till Maan came home. When he did, he was surprised to see dadima stay up for him. She said she would heat the food for him. She kept him company while he patiently finished dinner.

When he was done, he asked her to rest as he too needed sleep. He had had a long day and was tired. Dadima noticed his tiring eyes and gave him a pitying look but quickly smiled thinking he probably knew his day would be long and so he must have decided to spend the entire 30 minutes with Geet at breakfast itself. She kissed him on his head and both walked to their respective rooms.

"Geet!"

"Geet!"

"Darwaza kholo!"

"Geet!"

"Darwaza kholo!"


"Geet!"


Finally the balcony door opened and Geet came out. Her jaw dropped when she saw Maan standing on a ladder.


"Maan? Aap yahan? Is waqt? Dadima ne dekh liya toh?" Geet was nervously speaking in full speed while also holding his hand so he doesn't fall.


He took this time to climb up completely and into the room. He pulled her inside and shut the door behind him quickly.


When she began to speak again he placed his hand on her mouth "Shhh. Koi nahi dekhega Geet. Dadima ko lagta hai main so gaya hoon. Din mein sirf tees minute tumhare saath bitana mujhe gawara nahi. Main yeh rule follow nahi kar sakta. Tumhe nahi pata maine aaj ka din kaise kata hai office mein. Har pal yehi soch raha tha ki tum kya kar rahi hogi."


Geet was overwhelmed and at once hugged him. He held her tightly for a few moments before taking her to the bed. They sat there, arm in arm, talking about their day. Both were content to be with one another. It was a new feeling for them, sharing the day's activities with one another. They were truly living the moment.


After about an hour and a half, both were startled but some noise. They followed its direction and made their way to the balcony. Both looked down, then to one another all shocked, then again down, then to one another. "Eh lo. Yeh seedi toh gir gayi. Ab aap wapas kaise jayenge?"


"Upar wala bhi yehi chahta hai ki main tumhare paas ruk jaun" he said as he pulled her into an embrace. Shyness took over but soon she wiggled out of his embrace and said "Ab aap jaiye. Bohot der ho gayi hai. Kal office bhi toh jana hai."


She almost pushed him out the room towards the main outhouse door when he stopped her. "Woh dekho Geet. Dadima ke kamre ki light abhi tak jal rahi hai. Ab jaunga toh unhe pata chal jayega. Thodi der yahin rukna padega."


They kept checking every 15 minutes if Dadima's room lights went out. Finally after about 45 minutes they noticed the lights go out. Maan kissed Geet on the forehead and wished her good night before opening the door. She was right behind him when he opened the door. Both their hearts fell off their chests as Dadima and Annie stood in front of them, right outside the outhouse door...

Part 3 : Posted by sksg here
Edited by dolphinUSA - 13 years ago
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Posted: 13 years ago
#38
Hi Partner, you outdid yourself this time. I loved the way you took the story. It is worth the wait adn thanks for surprising me on my birthday. While reading your story, I was thinking of making Dadi or someone else knock the door for the start of my part, but you did it for me. Thanks partner. I will continue from here and try to bring it back in synch with the ongoing story. But, not sure how long it will take.
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Posted: 13 years ago
#39
love it..
cant wait for the nxt part.
update soon
thx
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Posted: 13 years ago
#40
awesome! seriously love it i really wanna know what there reactions are gonna be when annie and dadima question themπŸ˜†
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