You are mine twinj ff part 63 pg 24updated - Page 2

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Posted: 8 years ago
#11
Hi dear!
Sooo sooo sorry I couldn't reply nor comment before! I am just too busy in studies and the stupid game called life trying to battle all the challenges.

Anyway!
You are writing the story brilliantly and please don't change the story at all as I'm loving it and I'm also intrigued as I see that there is something lieing in this story that does not meet the eye. We need to read between the lines don't we as there is some mystery hidden.
So yes I'm loving the story and the way your telling it is also wonderful.

Just one suggestion hope you don't mind me giving it if possible it would be better if you can write each person's dialogue on a new line rather than continuing it in the same paragraph as it gets confusing and sometimes slighly difficult to read. I hope you understood what I wanted to say. I hope that I didn't hurt you by saying this.

Once again wonderfully written.
Glad to see that you are updating almost 2 chappys per day makes me sooo happy!
Update soon kya hai naa I'm a bit lalchi and greedy when it comes to twinj and unki stories.
If you need anything don't hesitate to contact me.
Lots ans lots of love.
Sayli
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Posted: 8 years ago
#12
Part6
At the party sarna mansion
Kunj friends including Twinke arrived. Kunj introduced everyone to his family.
Manohar.. Tum Leela taneja ki beti Twinke taneja ho na.
Tw.. Ji uncle.
Ma.. Sach mein tumari ma bohth great hai. Lagta tum bhi unki tare ho. Shukriya aap sabne aaj aap log kunj ki b day party mein anekeliye.
Ar.. Uncle aap kesa bath kar rahe hai kunj hameri dost hai Amritsar ka shan hai. Hum sab ka yehi mokka hai usse aur uski girlfriend ko milneka.
Ma.. Girlfriend. Kon hai kunj ka girlfriend.
Raj.. Koi b toh nehi yeh mazak karaha hai he stomped arman foot and armaan shouted aah.
Ma.. Kya hua beta.
Ar.. Kuch nehi voh bus machar ne katta hoga. And glared and raj.
Raj whispered.. Arman kunj ne kya kaha usne abhi tak unski family ko nehi bataya hai toh apne muh bandh rakho.
Raj went to kunj
Raj.. Kunj ab toh bata do voh kon hai. Kunj nooded and went to the centre of the hall.
Ku.. Bebe ,bhabhi, bhaiya ma .,papa thauji thaiji. Mein aap sab ko kuch batane vale hoon.
Be.. Kya hai beta.
Ku.. Voh bebe aap sabne mujhe yeh puchta raha ki koi tume milgaya ya phir tum kisiko pasand karte ho. Aaj mein yeh kehena vali hoon ki haan mujhe kisise hogaya pyar. Sry mery bhabhi and yuvi bhai meine aaj tak aap sekoi bath nehi chupaya.jisse mein pyar karti hoon na Voh chatiti ki mein aap sabke batao, lekin meine ek sehi mokka ka indizar karaha ta. Issiliye aaj mein ussko sab ke samne introduce karna chatu ho.
Bebe twisted kunj's ear and said vah mera sher tumne kudh ladki chunliya. Humera kam asaan kardiya.
Mery... koi baath nehi kunj vesa pehla ek bath bata ussme aesa kya hai ki tum usme ko gyai.
Ku.. Babhi voh sabki tara mera surat nehi meri seeratse mujhe pasand karti hai . Voh aesi ladki hai joh dil ki saf cherae mein mausmiyat aur toh aur sabse pyari hai.
Sab log... Aur.
Kunj.. Aur meri dil ki bohth kareeb hai. Aur mera ek ek dadkan usse bulati hai. everybody shouted aur.
Kunj.. aur sabse aachi hai.
Bebe.. Itna ache ache bata batakar mujhe ne usse dekne ka bohth man kar raha hai. All his friends shouted yes kunj who is that lucky girl.kunj was going to tell her name when a girl comes from the door and hugged kunj tightly. The girl said I love you too kunj. Everyone clapped. Kunj said Jiya. Then the girl is shown wearing a punjabhi dress, with colorful bangles in her hands and a lightmake up on her face and looking very beautiful .
jiya.. hi kunj mujhe pata ta ki tum mujhe yehi introduce karoogi lekin iski zaroorat kya hai. Jiya went and took blessings from everyone. Everyone blessed her.
Be.. Toh yeh hai meri pyari kudi mera matlab hai kunj ki kudi. Usha.. Jiya tune 2 sal mein humera sath london mein ti or hume bataya bhi nehi ki tum dono ek dusre ko pyar karti ho. Ji.. Aunty sry aunty actually meine kunj sei bola ta sabko b olne keliye lekin isne bataya ki time aane ki bath hum aap sab logoko batayenge.
Us.. Koi bath nehi hai beta. Vesa b mujhe toh tum bohth pasand hai.
Ku.. Loh isse ane ke bath sab mujhe bul gyayein.
Mery. Tum kon ho bhai.
Ku- Ab yehi sunnae keliye bakki reh gyatha. Everyone laughed. Kunj introduced everyone to jiya.
Ku- Jiya and this one is Twinke..
Twinkle taneja.
Jiya ..hey Twinke. I think i had met you before. Aur vesa tum bohth koob surat lagri hai yaar.
Tw.-Acha lekin mein aap ko dekha nehi anf Tq for the compliment.
Tw.-Acha kunj mujhe late horahi hai mein jakar aati hoon.
Ku-Pehle kaane kakar toh ja.
Tw.. Nehi kunj mujhe na bohth kaam hai mujhe jaana hoga.
Ji.. Hey kunj tume bebe bulari hai.
Twinkle left after talking with Jiya.
On the other side
Ta.. Sach mein tanya bohth koobsurat hai yaar.
Ch.. Haan tanu aesa laga nehi voh bohth show off. Lekin bohth traditional hai yaar.
Dim.. Haan yaar kunj ko aesa ladki pasand hai. Mujhe laga ki voh hot aur sexy ladki se pyar karega. Aur yahaan dekho iss Jiya se pyar hogaya. Vese bhi selection both buri bi nehi hai.
Ch.. Tu ab shuru mat karo. Pata nehi Twinke kahan hai.
Ta. Voh toh party aane nehi jaathi ti zabardasti se kunj ne usse bulaye hai shayd phir se college ja chuki hoge ya phir uska ghar
Di. Ves bhi twinkle se hum expect kya kar sakte hai.
Ch.. Dimple voh kesa bhi hai bohth achi hum sabki tara apne bare mein nehi dusro ki bare mein pehla sochti hai. Voh shayad iss jiya sebhi aachi hai.
Tan.. Tu toh aesi bol rahi hai ki tum ko Jiya ki baremein sab kuch pata hai.
Ch.. Jiya ki bare mein toh nehi pata lekin tum logo ko humere Twinke ki bare mein toh pata hai na ..ya yaad diladoon
Tum dono ko voh kitni madath ki hai. Tanya tujhe Twinke ne us loser karan se tujhe baachay bulgayi kya vahi karan joh tume humesha pareshan karte arata. Aur dimple, usse tume apne jaan ki parva kare bina tujhe accident hone se bachaiya aur tum dono sab kuch bulkar usse kosrahe ho. Uski apni marzi hai, uski apni duniya hai, voh joh karna chati hai humesha dusre keliye karti hai. Issiliye agar uske barme kuch ulta seedha bolne se pehle kuch soch kar bola karo. Haan meine bhi usse uski harkat keliye usse dat tihoon lekin mein usse kabhi force nehi karti hoon. Kyonki mein jaanti hoon voh joh bhi karti ache keliye karti hai. Voh hum sab ki tara apne maa baap ki peso se nehi apne kudh ki peso se apne kudh ki paro se kade hona chati hai. Toh hum sab usski sath hona chaiye naki usse do bath sunnana. Shayad jiya achi hogi lekin twinkle ki tare sabse achi kabhi nehi ho sakti. Yeh mein yekin ke sath keh sakti hoo. Samjay tum dono.
Tanya.. Acha tk iam sorry.
Dim. Haa yaar meine kuch zyada bolgyai.
Chinky.. Yeh sab Twinke ki samne math bolo usko bohth bura lagega.ab chale. They all had dinner and left from kunj's house
Edited by Sosan - 8 years ago
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Posted: 8 years ago
#13
Read all the parts today..
Its really nice...
At first I thought that the girl is twinkle... And they are just pretending in front of everyone
But it turned out to be jiya.
.. Anyways..nice plot..
Continue soon... I am soo curious to know what'll happen next..
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Posted: 8 years ago
#14
Part 7
All celebrated the college day and after a week back to their normal lifes.
In college
Raj.. Kunj tu kush haina Jiya ki sath.
Ku.. Tu aesa kyu puchraha hai.
Raj. Nehi bus tujhe mein achse jaanti hoon bachpan se. Sirf 5 se mein tujhe nehi dekh paye iss ka matlab yeh toh nehi mein apni voh purana dosti buljaonga.
Ku.. Tu na bilkul pagal hai. Aesa kuch nehi mein bohth kush hoon.
Acha tk mein ghar jaraha hoon aaj yuvi bhai ka roka hai. Bohth tyari karni hai. Tu sham ko ajaana.. Tk. bye. Kunj left but raj felt something was wrong.
Kunj went somewhere and talked with someone and leaved to his home.
Sarna mansion
Be.. Ladki wale aatai honge sablog kahan hai.
Yuvi was engaged to simple singh. She looked very beautiful in her traditional attire. And yuvi was awe strucked to see her. He complimented with eyes and simple blushed.
Kunj.. Bhaiya ab bus bhi kijiye aur kitna gurrogi
Yuvi.. Tu apne mu bandh rakh. Meri hona wali hai. Jitna bhi chahoon mein dekh sakti hoon.
Ku.. Bhai yeh bath aap kehare ho. Mujhe sach mein yakin nehi hora hai. Karlo karlo jab bebo ko bataoongi na tab apko pata chalege
Yu. Mera lad aesa mat bolo. Mein toh sirf aesi hi bolata. Jab teri bari ayegi tab tujhe sataounga dekhlena tu.
Roka ended with all the riti rivajh. And everyone prayed god to keep this couple happier always.
roka got over yuvi took simple to his room and showed her his room
Yuvi pulled simple towards himself and said ab kahaan jayegi
Sim.. Yuvaraj chodo koi ajayga.
Yuv.. Koi nehi ayega tujjko mujhe satana mein bohth maza arata na ab kya karegi. Like wise he came closer to her.
Sim. Yuvraj plz
Yuvi. Nehi chodunga. Mujhe ek kiss dedo phir dekte hain
Sim. Acha tujhe kiss chaiye yuvraj nodded she moved forward while yuvi closed his eyes but she pinched his hands and rushed out.yuvi shouted and turned back
Yu.. Jungli bili hai yeh... simple came back kissed his cheek and went out. Yuvraj was shocked come happy and smiled. Then kunj entered.
Yu.. Kya hua kuch pata chala
Ku.. Nehi bai
Yu.. Tu pareshan kyu Hai
Ku.. Aap toh sab kuch jante ho na ki meri parsheeni kya hai.
Yu. Fikar mat kar sab kuch tk hojayenge
Ku.. Ok bai aapi meri himat hai kaash aap jesa bolrahe hai vesa hi ho.
Yu.. Aesa hi hoga
Mery.. Kya chal raha bhaiyoon ki beech mein
Yu.. Kuch nehi yeh bus mujhe simple ke sath mazak karaha hai.
Mery.. Kunj mujhe ek bath bata kya tum logo ko mein bewakoof lagti hoon. Tum donoko ache se janti hoon mein. Agr mujhe bth nehi btaya na mein neeche jakar sab kuch boldunga. Tum dono kabse mujhe bate chuppane shuru kardiye. Bulgyai kya mein bhi tumara team mein hoon. ..Haan ab bataoge ya mein sab ko bulao
Ku.. Acha tk bhabhi plz aap kesi se mat kehana yeh bath
Mery.. Tk batao
Kunj said something and it was muted.
Next day in college
Ch.. Twinkle tujhe pata hai aaj kya hai.
Tw.. Pata hai. Aaj se 4 sal pehle mujhe chinky naam ka koi dost mila hai.
Ch.. Tujhe yaad hai. Its great. Aur tujsse milne ke bath mujhe rohan mila ,tum dono sath mein Amritsar aye te.aaj party toh banti hai.
Tw.. Nehi mera mood nehi hai. Tu sham ko ghar aa mein teri fav alloka parata banakr kiladoongi
Ch.. Its grt done sham ko tera ghr. Iam so excited. Tera hatooka khane kake bohth din hogayi. Kya idea socha hai Twinke. You r the best.
Jiya and Tanya was also there .
Jiya toh tum amritsar mein char sal pehle aye ho
Tw.. Haan yaar mein usse pehle delhi mein ti. Meri maa ka transfer hogaya toh hum yahan agaye pure parivaar ke sath.
They were all talking when dimple came and announced intercollege dance competition.
Everyone were exited including kunj
Dim.. It was a couple dance so our college ka handsome ladka kunj and beautiful girl will participate this time and i also registered your names. Kya bolte ho guys.
Everyone hurrayed.
Ji.. Its so swt of you dimple. I love dancing even kunj too. I will definitely participate. We will rock Kyu twinkle what say.
Ch.. Twinkle doesn't like dancing
Ji.. Its so weird. You dont like dancing. Everyone loves but you hates aesa kyu
Tw.. Pata nehi yaar. Bus dancing vancing na pasand nehi hai mujhe
Kunj starred Twinke at this statement and left from there.


Sry for the short epi guys.



Edited by Sosan - 8 years ago
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Posted: 8 years ago
#15
Its was awesome
Kya sach meim kunj jiya ko pasant karthi he


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Posted: 8 years ago
#16
Part 8
The dance practising started between kunj and jiya
Everyone was stunned by their performance.
Tanya.. Sach me bohth achi Hai na in dono ki chemistry. So romantic and mesemerising yaar.
Ch.. Haan yaar. Suddenly jiya leg tripped and she fall down. She was shouting in pain.
Ku.. kya hua jiya.
Ji ..Kunj bohth pain horaha hai.
Ku.. Tu utt. Kunj put jiya's one hand on his shoulder and clutched her waist tightly. He made her sit on the chair. Chinky offered her water. And asked are u fine. Jiya just nodded. After 15 minutes doctor arrived
Ku.. Doctor saab aye.
Ji. Kunj doctor ki bulane ki kya zaroot hai mein tk hoon.
Ku.. Tu chup reh aur inki kaam karne de.
Doctor checked her and said that she had a severe sprain in her legs. And she cant move it for two weeks.
Ji.. But kunj agle hafte to competition hai mein kesi dance karoongi.
Ku.. Tu dance nehi karegi.
Ch.. Agr issne dance nehi kiya toh hum competition haar jayenga.
Ku.. Dimple kya hum naam badal sakte hain.
Di.. Off course hum badal sakte hain lekin itni kam same mein tumera sath vahi chemistry koi bana sakta hai kya
Ku.. Pata nehi. Lekin aap log fikar mat kejiye kuch hojayega
Ji.. Kunj tum kisi ke sath bhi dance karlogi.
Ku.. Are nehi baba aesi nehi. Tujhe mein dnce karna nehi doonga. Kyunki mujhe tumari chinta hai. Ab humara college ka izzat ka sawal hai. Issiliye toh mein yeh step leraha hoon.
Ch.. Lekin itni kam same mein tumari sath dance karlege kon. Hei koi tumare dimak mein koi naam.
Di.. Hume na aaj se dance auditions karni padegi. Jisse kunj ki sath agar aadha percent bhi match hua na hum unneko select kardenga kya bolrahi chinky. Hum toh sabse best nehi doond sakte voh toh saaf saaf dikraha ki jiyaka substitute koi nehi le sakta. Toh atleast hum koshish toh kar sakte haina
Ch.. Iss ke lava humera pass ab option b nehi hai. Dimple tu announce kar mei room tyar karti hoon.
Every girls wanted to dance with Kunj. So there was a big cue near the music room. Jiya chinky tnya and dimple started their pair selecting machine. Kunj danced with each other girl but no one cn match atleast half of kunj and Jiya's chemistry.
Two days passed. Finally a girl named sara appeared she matched their expectations. So everyone decided sara as the partners. Dimple went again to change the name in the dance form list. And atlast everything set. Jiya warned sara to stay away from kunj. And also said that it is only for the competition she is allowing someone near him otherwise she will kill the person. Kunj just smiled to her statement.
Ch.. Twinkle tu arahi hai na aaj competition mein.
Tw.. Nehi chinky mujhe na ghar mein bohth kam hai. Tum log jao.
Ch.. aacha tk mein rohan ke sath chali jaongi.
Twinkle left college.
At the competition
Everyone was keenly waiting for the kura(kunj and sara) performance .
At last the moment came. The stage lights became dim. Their arrives kunj and sara. Kunj gve his hand to her as a true gentle man. She gave her hand. He not only holding it but intertwined his hand to gain more grip.
He put his hands on her waist and pulled her closer. She dashed his face to his chest. She slowly raised her head. Her eyes was covered with satin cloth. The dance is potraying that she is blind. Her companion is showing her the way as she keeps holding his hand. Kunj lifts her up dipps her down. For a moment kunj is dancing all alone. His partner is finding way to reach him. suddenly she trips but falls in his arms showing that he is always their to protect her. He make her eat . Cuddles with her. Took her like a baby by just doing dance moments. The light becomes dark nd the light comes back but we could see only the girl with blind. Now the girl is alone dancing. And it is showing that she is waiting for so many days to meet him. But he doesn't came. Another man came and said that Iam your mate. But she remembers his touch even without seeing him. So she pushed that man and said in moves that you r not my mate. He said it is true and told that that i killed him. The girl broke down and lost her life. Then a heaven is shown again the blind girl and her true love meets and dance finishes by saying that true love is touch and feelings that we cn understand it very well. True love is not blind but if eyes r blind to see ur soulmate, and ur love is around we can feel it. Everyone stand and clapped for the couple chinky tanya dimple r stunned by their performance. Except jiya who is burning in jealousy.
Ch.. In done kamal kardiya yaar. Hum toh laga kunj aurJiya ki pair sabse best hai. Lekin yahaan dekho kunj aur sara ne stage ko aag lagadiya yaar.
Ta.. Haan yaar. Such mein. Kamal ta. Short time inti amazing chemistry toh yeh dono hi la sakte hai.
Di.. Mein practise karta waght shayd tk se nehi dekha hoge issilie mujhe lagha hum haar jayenga lekin aaj mein yekin ke sath key sakti hoon humi jeetenga.
As gussed by dimple kunj nd sara won the competition. They both went to stages and collected the awards. All again clapped with standing aviation.




Shaveerkti thumbnail
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Posted: 8 years ago
#17
The story getting interesting...
And the mystery continues...

Is the girl really sara?I thought it to be Twinkle...

Waiting for the next update...
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Posted: 8 years ago
#18

Originally posted by: Shaveerkti

The story getting interesting...

And the mystery continues...

Is the girl really sara?I thought it to be Twinkle...

Waiting for the next update...

Tq so much for your comment. Yes you will find everything mystery here, but soon you will get cleared
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Posted: 8 years ago
#19
Hello sosan
The story is getting interesting day by day
I am waiting for it
so do continue


Edited by dafodilsduke - 8 years ago
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Posted: 8 years ago
#20
Part 9
In college
Everyone appreciated kunj and sara performance. And for the next one week everyone in the college were talking about kunj and sara. This doesn't go well with Jiya. She searched sara everywhere . A girl said tht she is in the music room. Jiya went to music room to meet sara there. Jiya couldn't see her face as she is turning backwards and assumed her to b sara. But actually twinkle is present there.
Ji.. Tune bohth badi galti ki hai. Kunjke sath dance krke. Mein tujhe nehi choodungi. She smirked and closed the music room. Twinkle turned to find the music room closed. She made all possible ways to come out but there s no response. Music room is a very closed room and sound from it cannot b heared so easily from inside. And also the college time ended. No one was there in the college .Here twinkle started feeling suffocation. And she cant breathe properly due to continues Sweating. But no one heared her. She started calling chinky but her phone got dead. Suddenly she fainted and fall near the door.
After dropping Jiya to her home, Kunj is seen driving the car. But he don't no why but is feeling suffocated. He parked the car in the corner and came out of it.
Ku.. Hey vaiguru mujhe kya horaha. Mujhe aesa lagraha ki mujhe koi bulraha hai. Kisiki mujhe zaroot hai. He started to sit in the car woth these thoughts when he sw leela.
Ku.. Namesty aunty .
Lee. Beta aaj tu college nehi gya hai kya.
Ku..Aunty. Mein college sehi araha hoon. Aaj kuch extra classes ta issiliye late hogayti. Kyu kya hua aunty.
Lee.. Aacha lekin twinkle toh aesa kuch nehi kaha hai
Ku.. Aunty twinkle keliye nehi mere liye hai.
Lee. Toh ap tak toh ane chaiye tha na
Ku.. Haan Twinke toh kabse college se chali gyai voh kehrati usski saman music room mein hai use lekar seedha ghar chalijyagi.
Lee.. Lekin usne abhi tak ghar nehi pochaiya beta.
Ku.. Aunty shayad usse na koi padai vadai yaad ayi hogi issiliye libraryein rukh gyai hogi.
Lee.. Agar aesa hai toh Twinke kabhi nehi boolti mujhe batnekeliye.
Ku.. Mein usse abhi call karti hoon.
Twinkle call came to be switched off
Ku.. Uska no switched off araha ha. Mein phor se try karti hoon. But off no use.
Lee.. Mujhe bohth dar lagra hai beta.
Ku.. Aunty shayad voh library mein hogi. Apni phone ki battery katam hone ki vajase usne aapko phone karne bul gayi hogi.
Aap fikar mat kejiye. Mein usse college se lekar atta hoon
Kunj returned to college and went to library but didn't find Twinke there. He searched the classes but she was not there too. Now he is confirmed that Twinke was in music room. He went to music room and strted beating the doors and shouted r u there. But no response came. He went from there but something strucked him. He can feel that Twinke is near. He just open the outside bolt but didn't opened as he thought twinkle might b near the door. So opening it will cause her harm. So he climbed the pipe of the music room, since it is in the third floor, he broke the glass of the window jumped inside and reached the room. He found Twinke fainted he went near her and patted her faces and found her pulse rate to b low. So he rubbed her hands and legs by calling her name. But she didn't opened her eyes. So atlast thought of mouth to mouth respiration. He gave her mouth respiration by pressing her heart again and again. Slowly Twinke came back to senses. She opened her eyes and found kunj in front. Without even thinking she hugged him tightly along with crying . Kunj was just caressing her hair and calming her down.
Ku.. Bus Twinke mat ro dekho mein hoon na yahan pei kuch nehi hoga tume.. bus ..bus.
Tw.. Kunj mein bohth Dar gyai ti. She said in between her sobs.
Ku.. Acha tk kuch nehi bus. Ro mat yaar. Tu roti haina toh mujhe aacha nehi lagraha hai.
She again incresed her hugging.
Ku.. Twinkle.
Tw.. Mujhe yahan se le chalo.
Ku.. Acha tk ab utt.
She holded her hand and tried to get up but due to weekness she couldn't. Kunj picked her up in his arms and opened the door and took her to his car. While doing this they both r sharing some cute eyelocks.
In car
Tw.. Maa ko nehi bol sakti yeh sab. Mein kya karoon.
Kunj thought for sometime and spoke dekh Twinke mujhe pata hai ki tu kisi ke sath bahar nehi jayegi. Lekin ab tum ghar gyai na toh leela aunty ko sab kuch pata chal jayega issiliye unko call karke boldo ki anne nmei der hogi. Aur vesa bhi voh bohth pareshan horahi hogi
Tw.. Toh mein kya kahoon maa se
Ku.. Hey bhagwan sab kuch bolna padta hai tu na bilkul bacchi hai.
Tw.. Mein bacchi nehi hoon. Samje
Ku.. Tu bacchi hai aur aaj tune sabit karliya iss harkat karne ki bath.. Siyappa queen.
Tw.. Kabhi bolte ho bachhi, kabhi bolti hoon siyappa queen. Tum na bohth irritating ho. Aur mein sirf twinkle hoon.
Ku.. Ab leela aunty ko call kar. Aur unse bol ki teri mobile mein battery down hogathi issiliye call nehi karpayi ane mein late hojaygi. Kyuki tu apni dost ki ghar jarahi hai kuch notes lene mein. Ayi samaj.
Twinkle nodded her head and did as said by kunj. Leela get relieved after talking with her and told her to come soon.
Tw.. Mein chinky ki ghar nehi jaa sakti aesa.
Ku.. Lekin mera ghar toh aa sakti haina. Dont worry mein apni pariwaar ko batatunga ki yeh sab kisiko mat bata na. Ab tk
Twinked just moved her head in yes like a small baby obeying her parent.
Kunj just smiled at her behaviour and left to his home.



Edited by Sosan - 8 years ago
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