Thank you so much and I'll update today 😊
Part-2
Sanjivani was always home to her. She has been here from her childhood. She had seen it grow and change along with her. She has dreamed in its premises and watch those dreams scatter too. Nothing ever had came easily to her. Neither the degree of medicine, nor the field she wanted to specialize in, nor love, neither friendship. After all she was the diva and diva’s seldom have true friends. The loneliness even when surrounded by thousands was her constant, unwavering companion. The smiles never quite reaching her eyes or the people around her. The burden of legacy strangling her everyday and loneliness tearing her heart apart. She wasn’t Ridhima daughter of a nurse and adopted daughter of her father who cleared her medical entrance exam at first attempt. No, she wasn’t dutiful and sincere Ridhima whom her father loved dearly. She was Anjali daughter of Dr Shashank and Dr Smriti, daughter of two great doctors of yet she couldn’t clear the medical entrance exam at first attempt like her beloved adopted sister. No, she faced failures and shortcomings it took her two tries to enter the medical universe with her sister, same class even when she was older than her. Her sister was natural in everything and she was the one who have to cram everything and not fall from the pedestal of expectations built for her yet she failed and failed spectacularly many times.
She wanted to be a cardio surgeon, she dreamt of becoming that through her internship and residency but while clearing the entrance exam for PG she didn’t score enough marks to get either neuro or cardio as her chosen field. So, she chose master of surgery in gynaecology, following her late mother’s footsteps and oh, how difficult it was to fill those footsteps, the legacy and image to maintain. If she calls her internship days tiring then the residency was killing, away from her home and friends, the bubble of gloom and loneliness always around her yet she survived everything and succeeded even when her heart and soul begged her to give away many times but she succeeded and joined her father back in the hospital that was her home and grew a little more everyday away from her sister and love.
In her life no one was just with her, everyone showed their disappointment on her failures but no one told her how proud they were of her when she succeeded maybe her scores weren’t as great as Ridhima’s, maybe she wasn’t as intelligent and natural in all this as Ridhima and as genius and excellent as her parents but she tried her best and no one ever told her that they’re proud of her attempts. They’re proud of what she is no one understood what she was going through, so many shoes to fill. So many shadows lurking here and there telling her how she can’t ever be the daughter Dr Shashank Gupta deserves. How her dad must have wished that Ridzi was his biological daughter and not her. How her dad wanted someone like Dr Juhi to be his eldest daughter, who could make him proud and well known like she never could. The way he praised Dr Juhi and kept clippings and copies of all her achievements didn’t at all sprinkle salt to her already burning wounds and enlarged the already large shoes to fill.
And she couldn’t tell anyone this, she couldn’t let people see what a failure she actually is, failure both professionally and personally never getting what she desires, her self esteem crumbled by her own father every now and then. The slights were always there and now she believes maybe she deserves all those slights for never ever being just enough to him, for failing him so many times. For not being what he wanted her to be and for being responsible for all this mess.
The knock on the door disturbed her train of thoughts and saved her from the darkness of her own mind. “Dr Anjali, here are the files" a very fatigued Ishani informed her, holding a bunch of files.
“Okay, You can go now Dr. Ishani” she watched as the girl visibly took a sigh of relief and left her cabin nodding at her. Dr Ishani Aurora another genius prodigy of her father, a girl she shouldn’t be jealous of but couldn’t help but be so another natural in the field, born to be a doctor. A girl her father allowed to call him uncle in the hospital premises when she and her sister weren’t ever allowed to call him dad during their internship days, scolded every time they slipped and called him father and now this girl was allowed to call him uncle from the starting days in the hospital and she couldn’t help but muse on how unfair life is to her. Life has snatched away everyone she holds dear, snatched her mom when she needed her most, needed her guidance and support and then provided her with a new mom. A mom she couldn’t just call mom at the starting no matter how much love the lady showered on her. No, she just couldn’t even when she wanted too as the memories of her mom was so clear and it felt so wrong but when she accepted her as her mother, when she leaned on her and let her guide her, love her and cherish her, God snatched her away too. Oh, how she hates God for doing all this to her.
She looked at the files Dr Ishani has left on the table and put them all on the side. "To go through latter", she told herself as her mind was too busy to concentrate on anything else right now.
She has noticed the change in the girl as the year passed. The rule following girl that entered the premises of their hospital on the first day has changed into someone she couldn’t quite place. The girl who kept on surrounding herself with work and stayed as far as possible from people has changed. She was still brilliant in work but their was a new learning and listening attitude in her. An attitude everyone appreciated and many doctors who rejected her prior wanted her in her team but she didn’t know how Dr Ishani ended up choosing her team, learning and listening patiently and even understanding other people. The complaining glint, the sigh and sometimes emotional outbursts were also becoming a package deal of Dr Ishani who worked like a machine in her starting days but now seemed more human to everyone around her, her change in attitude made her endearing to the rest of hospital and housing staff, well maybe except Dr Rishab. She doesn’t know what’s wrong with them but she can feel the cold wars going inside the premises between the doctors, maybe she wouldn’t have paid much mind to it before, maybe the displays of friendship in the hospital premises would have made her scrunch her nose in agony or despair, remembering her friendless, competitive years or the broken friendship of her life as glimpses of Dr Sapna, Dr Atul, Dr Armaan ran wildly in her mind but her heart feels pleased watching the friendship and the firm resolve to maintain the friendship even in their hectic schedules. She feels elated watching the respect in the residents eyes. The whole mentorship business is new to her and also the way fear and anticipation burns in her stomach for her prodigy. The whole being sought out for advices and called for dinners and parties is new to her and also the surprises but she wants to be a good mentor just like her father and she doesn’t know whether she’ll be able to achieve it or not ?? She doesn't know whether she has it in her or not??
Sometimes in her loneliest of moments, sitting along in the cafeteria or garden. She thinks what the others might think of this Sanjivani gang. How will they react or what kind of mentors they will be?? Sometimes she just sits and imagine their interactions on various situations and subjects. She imagines her sister and her ire watching Dr Ishani call their father uncle in hospital premises. She imagines her sister’s reaction to Dr Sid, the way she’ll freeze and imagine another Siddhant in the place of their Siddhant Mathur and the uttermost similar childish behaviour and smiles won’t help her cause too. She can practically see her sister avoiding Dr Sid and then again his closeness with their father won’t help the situation at all.
Sometimes she sits and thinks why all the feelings have to be this complicated?? Why we cant always have the people we love and why the words and small misunderstandings leave such deep impacts?? Why love is so confusing and tormenting?? Why every relation breaks and shatters like glass pieces and leave wounds in their place when she tries to collect those pieces.
“Dr Anjali" the voice that sent creepy chills in her body pulled her out of her thoughts of broken things
“Yes, Mr Vardhaan" she greeted their CFO as professionally as she could even when she could feel the cold tremors
“Why did you resign from the chief of surgery position???” Vardhan all but demanded from her and she hated trusting and leaning on this man for emotional support.
“I don’t t owe you an explanation Mr Vardhan , I discussed the cause with the CEO" she informed him rather coldly but she couldn’t make herself to care about this fact.
“Is this because of your father Dr Anjali?? Is Dr Shashank asking you to back off if he is I can talk to him and.....”
“Mr Vardhan...” she started but couldn’t continue as the sudden knock on the door startled both of them.
“come in" she ordered but really didn’t expect the person standing on the door, she couldn’t just believe her eyes is this an illusion or were her eyes playing a game with her??
"Are you busy right now, Dr Anjali" she asked with raised brows and a teasing look she was totally familiar with, a look she missed dearly.
“Not at all Dr Ridhima, come in" she didn’t know how the words escaped so casually but professionally out of her neither she cared about the displeased look on Vardhan's face.
“Mr Vardhaan can you excuse us, please" she asked the frowning man who left her and her sister alone thankfully.
“welcome back to Sanjeevani, Dr Ridhima. Sanjivani will be blessed to have an Oncologist as you" she greeted her professionally as the girl threw herself in her arms stating “I missed you too, di"
“I missed you, Ridzi.....I missed you a lot" she whispered back to her, letting the tears finally free.
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Absolutely beautiful writing Arhanya.. I could just feel the pain that Anjali might have gone through Again you've made my eyes watery.. Please continue.. Will be waiting for Riddhima & Anjali's catch-up
Beautifully written. I can feel anjalis pain.
Superb update hun. Loved it.
Wanna c juhi and Rahuls scene
Beautifully written. I can feel anjalis pain.
Superb update hun. Loved it.
Wanna c Kuhu and Rahuls scene
Kuhu?😆
Word Count: 1
Originally posted by: Ayesha066
Absolutely beautiful writing Arhanya.. I could just feel the pain that Anjali might have gone through Again you've made my eyes watery.. Please continue.. Will be waiting for Riddhima & Anjali's catch-up
Thank you so much Ayesha and I'll be writing that part soon. 😊😊😊
Love u Arhanya 😘for beautifully portraying Anjali's emotions. I always wanted them to show this but...
Awesome 👏
Two things: Plz stick to one spelling of Sanjivani & in title it should be heartbeats (plural) becoz life has many & not one.
Beautifully written. I can feel anjalis pain.
Superb update hun. Loved it.
Wanna c juhi and Rahuls scene
Thank you so much dear, don't worry they will be there soon too. Juhi and Rahul will make appearance soon dont worry.
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