hello guys, so here m again wid chapter 2
2. OPEN BOOKThe next day was better' and worse.
It was better because it wasn't raining yet, though the clouds were dense and opaque. It
was easier because I knew what to expect of my day. rahul came to sit by me in English,
and walked me to my next class, with Chess Club vishal glaring at him all the while; that
was nattering. People didn't look at me quite as much as they had yesterday. I sat with a
big group at lunch that included rahul, vishal, riya, and several other people whose
names and faces I now remembered. I began to feel like I was treading water, instead of
drowning in it.
It was worse because I was tired; I still couldn't sleep with the wind echoing around the
house. It was worse because Mr. Varner called on me in Trig when my hand wasn't raised
and I had the wrong answer. It was miserable because I had to play volleyball, and the
one time I didn't cringe out of the way of the ball, I hit my teammate in the head with it.
And it was worse because fateh singh rathore wasn't in school at all.
All morning I was dreading lunch, fearing his bizarre glares. Part of me wanted to
confront him and demand to know what his problem was. While I was lying sleepless in
my bed, I even imagined what I would say. But I knew myself too well to think I would
really have the guts to do it. I made the Cowardly Lion look like the terminator.
But when I walked into the cafeteria with riya ' trying to keep my eyes from
sweeping the place for him, and failing entirely ' I saw that his four siblings of sorts
were sitting together at the same table, and he was not with them.
rahul intercepted us and steered us to his table. riya seemed elated by the attention,
and her friends quickly joined us. But as I tried to listen to their easy chatter, I was
terribly uncomfortable, waiting nervously for the moment he would arrive. I hoped that
he would simply ignore me when he came, and prove my suspicions false.
He didn't come, and as time passed I grew more and more tense.
I walked to Biology with more confidence when, by the end of lunch, he still hadn't
showed. rahul, who was taking on the qualities of a golden retriever, walked faithfully by
my side to class. I held my breath at the door, but fateh wasn't there, either. I
exhaled and went to my seat. rahul followed, talking about an upcoming trip to the beach.
He lingered by my desk till the bell rang. Then he smiled at me wistfully and went to sit
by a girl with braces and a bad perm. It looked like I was going to have to do something
about rahul, and it wouldn't be easy. In a town like this, where everyone lived on top of
everyone else, diplomacy was essential. I had never been enormously tactful; I had no
practice dealing with overly friendly boys.
I was relieved that I had the desk to myself, that fateh was absent. I told myself that
repeatedly. But I couldn't get rid of the nagging suspicion that I was the reason he wasn't
there. It was ridiculous, and egotistical, to think that I could affect anyone that strongly. It
was impossible. And yet I couldn't stop worrying that it was true.
When the school day was finally done, and the blush was fading out of my cheeks from
the volleyball incident, I changed quickly back into my jeans and navy blue sweater. I
hurried from the girls' locker room, pleased to find that I had successfully evaded my
retriever friend for the moment. I walked swiftly out to the parking lot. It was crowded
now with fleeing students. I got in my truck and dug through my bag to make sure I had
what I needed.
Last night I'd discovered that avinash couldn't cook much besides fried eggs and bacon.
So I requested that I be assigned kitchen detail for the duration of my stay. He was
willing enough to hand over the keys to the banquet hall. I also found out that he had no
food in the house. So I had my shopping list and the cash from the jar in the cupboard
labeled FOOD MONEY, and I was on my way to the market.
I gunned my deafening engine to life, ignoring the heads that turned in my direction,
and backed carefully into a place in the line of cars that were waiting to exit the parking
lot. As I waited, trying to pretend that the earsplitting rumble was coming from someone
else's car, I saw the two rathores getting into their car. It was the shiny
new Volvo. Of course. I hadn't noticed their clothes before ' I'd been too mesmerized by
their faces. Now that I looked, it was obvious that they were all dressed exceptionally
well; simply, but in clothes that subtly hinted at designer origins. With their remarkable
good looks, the style with which they carried themselves, they could have worn dishrags
and pulled it off. It seemed excessive for them to have both looks and money. But as far
as I could tell, life worked that way most of the time. It didn't look as if it bought them
any acceptance here.
No, I didn't fully believe that. The isolation must be their desire; I couldn't imagine any
door that wouldn't be opened by that degree of beauty.
They looked at my noisy truck as I passed them, just like everyone else. I kept my eyes
straight forward and was relieved when I finally was free of the school grounds.
The market was not far from the school, just a few streets south, off the highway. It
was nice to be inside the supermarket; it felt normal. I did the shopping at home, and I
fell into the pattern of the familiar task gladly. The store was big enough inside that I
couldn't hear the tapping of the rain on the roof to remind me where I was.
When I got home, I unloaded all the groceries, stuffing them in wherever I could find
an open space. I hoped avinash wouldn't mind. I wrapped potatoes in foil and stuck them
in the oven to bake, covered a steak in marinade and balanced it on top of a carton of
eggs in the fridge.
When I was finished with that, I took my book bag upstairs. Before starting my
homework, I changed into a pair of dry sweats, pulled my damp hair up into a pony-tail,
and had decided to read Wuthering Heights ' the novel we were currently studying in
English ' yet again for the fun of it, and that's what I was doing when avinash came
home. I'd lost track of the time, and I hurried downstairs to take the potatoes out and put
the steak in to broil.
"annu?" my father called out when he heard me on the stairs.
Who else? I thought to myself.
"Hey, Dad, welcome home."
"Thanks." He hung up his gun belt and stepped out of his boots as I bustled about the
kitchen. As far as I was aware, he'd never shot the gun on the job. But he kept it ready.
When I came here as a child, he would always remove the bullets as soon as he walked in
the door. I guess he considered me old enough now not to shoot myself by accident, and
not depressed enough to shoot myself on purpose.
"What's for dinner?" he asked warily. My mother was an imaginative cook, and her
experiments weren't always edible. I was surprised, and sad, that he seemed to remember
that far back.
"Steak and potatoes," I answered, and he looked relieved.
I called him in when dinner was ready, and he sniffed appreciatively as he walked into
the room.
"Smells good, annu."
"Thanks."
We ate in silence for a few minutes. It wasn't uncomfortable. Neither of us was
bothered by the quiet. In some ways, we were well suited for living together.
"So, how did you like school? Have you made any friends?" he asked as he was taking
seconds.
"Well, I have a few classes with a girl named riya. I sit with her friends at lunch. And
there's this boy, rahul, who's very friendly. Everybody seems pretty nice." With one
outstanding exception.
"Do you know the rathore family?" I asked hesitantly.
"Dr. rathore's family? Sure. Dr. rathore's a great man."
"They' the kids' are a little different. They don't seem to fit in very well at school."
avinash surprised me by looking angry.
"People in this town," he muttered. "Dr. rathor is a brilliant surgeon who could
probably work in any hospital in the world, make ten times the salary he gets here," he
continued, getting louder. "We're lucky to have him ' lucky that his wife wanted to live
in a small town. He's an asset to the community, and all of those kids are well behaved
and polite. I had my doubts, when they first moved in, with all those adopted teenagers. I
thought we might have some problems with them. But they're all very mature ' I haven't
had one speck of trouble from any of them. That's more than I can say for the children of
some folks who have lived in this town for generations. And they stick together the way a
family should ' camping trips every other weekend' Just because they're newcomers,
people have to talk."
It was the longest speech I'd ever heard avinash make. He must feel strongly about
whatever people were saying.
I backpedaled. "They seemed nice enough to me. I just noticed they kept to themselves.
They're all very attractive," I added, trying to be more complimentary.
"You should see the doctor," avinash said, laughing. "It's a good thing he's happily
married. A lot of the nurses at the hospital have a hard time concentrating on their work
with him around."
We lapsed back into silence as we finished eating. He cleared the table while I started
on the dishes. He went back to the TV, and after I finished washing the dishes by hand '
no dishwasher ' I went upstairs unwillingly to work on my math homework. I could feel
a tradition in the making.
That night it was finally quiet. I fell asleep quickly, exhausted.
The rest of the week was uneventful. I got used to the routine of my classes. By Friday I
was able to recognize, if not name, almost all the students at school. In Gym, the kids on
my team learned not to pass me the ball and to step quickly in front of me if the other
team tried to take advantage of my weakness. I happily stayed out of their way.fateh didn't come back to school.
Every day, I watched anxiously until the rest of the rathores entered the cafeteria
without him. Then I could relax and join in the lunchtime conversation.
By Friday I was perfectly comfortable entering my Biology class, no longer worried
that fateh would be there. For all I knew, he had dropped out of school. I tried not to
think about him, but I couldn't totally suppress the worry that I was responsible for his
continued absence, ridiculous as it seemed.
My first weekend in Forks passed without incident. avinash, unused to spending time in
the usually empty house, worked most of the weekend. I cleaned the house, got ahead on
my homework, and wrote my mom more cheerful e-mail. I did drive to the
library Saturday, but it was so poorly stocked that I didn't bother to get a card; I would
have to make a date to visit midway soon and find a good bookstore. I
wondered idly what kind of gas mileage the truck got' and shuddered at the thought.
The rain stayed soft over the weekend, quiet, so I was able to sleep well.
People greeted me in the parking lot Monday morning. I didn't know all their names,
but I waved back and smiled at everyone. It was colder this morning, but happily not
raining. In English, rahul took his accustomed seat by my side. We had a pop quiz on
Wuthering Heights. It was straightforward, very easy.
All in all, I was feeling a lot more comfortable than I had thought I would feel by this
point. More comfortable than I had ever expected to feel here.
When we walked out of class, the air was full of swirling bits of white. I could hear
people shouting excitedly to each other. The wind bit at my cheeks, my nose.
"Wow," rahul said. "It's snowing."
I looked at the little cotton fluffs that were building up along the sidewalk and swirling
erratically past my face.
"Ew." Snow. There went my good day.
He looked surprised. "Don't you like snow?"
"No. That means it's too cold for rain." Obviously. "Besides, I thought it was supposed
to come down in flakes ' you know, each one unique and all that. These just look like
the ends of Q-tips."
"Haven't you ever seen snow fall before?" he asked incredulously.
"Sure I have." I paused." On TV."
rahul laughed. And then a big, squishy ball of dripping snow smacked into the back of
his head. We both turned to see where it came from. I had my suspicions about vishal, who
was walking away, his back toward us ' in the wrong direction for his next class.rahul
appatently had the same notion. He bent over and began scraping together a pile of the
white mush.
"I'll see you at lunch, okay?" I kept walking as I spoke. "Once people start throwing wet
stuff, I go inside."
He just nodded, his eyes on vishal's retreating figure.
Throughout the morning, everyone chattered excitedly about the snow; apparently it
was the first snowfall of the new year. I kept my mouth shut. Sure, it was drier than rain
' until it melted in your socks.
I walked alertly to the cafeteria with riya . Mush balls were flying
everywhere. I kept a binder in my hands, ready to use it as a shield if necessary. riya
thought I was hilarious, but something in my expression kept her from lobbing a
snowball at me herself.
rahul caught up to us as we walked in the doors, laughing, with ice melting the spikes
in his hair. He and riya were talking animatedly about the snow fight as we got in line
to buy food. I glanced toward that table in the corner out of habit. And then I froze where
I stood. There were five people at the table.
riya pulled on my arm.
"Hello? annu? What do you want?"
I looked down; my ears were hot. I had no reason to feel self-conscious, I reminded
myself. I hadn't done anything wrong.
"What's with annu?" rahul asked riya.
"Nothing," I answered. "I'll just get a soda today." I caught up to the end of the line.
"Aren't you hungry?" riya asked.
"Actually, I feel a little sick," I said, my eyes still on the floor.
I waited for them to get their food, and then followed them to a table, my eyes on my
feet.
I sipped my soda slowly, my stomach churning. Twice rahul asked, with unnecessary
concern, how I was feeling.
I told him it was nothing, but I was wondering if I should play it up and escape to the
nurse's office for the next hour.
Ridiculous. I shouldn't have to run away.
I decided to permit myself one glance at the rathore family's table. If he was glaring at
me, I would skip Biology, like the coward I was.
I kept my head down and glanced up under my lashes. None of them were looking this
way. I lifted my head a little.
They were laughing. fateh, danish, and mayur all had their hair entirely saturated
with melting snow. misha and allena were leaning away as mayur shook his dripping
hair toward them. They were enjoying the snowy day, just like everyone else ' only they
looked more like a scene from a movie than the rest of us.
But, aside from the laughter and playfulness, there was something different, and I
couldn't quite pinpoint what that difference was. I examined fateh the most carefully.
His skin was less pale, I decided ' flushed from the snow fight maybe ' the circles
under his eyes much less noticeable. But there was something more. I pondered, staring,
trying to isolate the change.
"annu, what are you staring at?" riya intruded, her eyes following my stare.
At that precise moment, his eyes flashed over to meet mine.
I dropped my head, letting my hair fall to conceal my face. I was sure, though, in the
instant our eyes met, that he didn't look harsh or unfriendly as he had the last time I'd
seen him. He looked merely curious again, unsatisfied in some way.
"fateh is staring at you," riya giggled in my ear.
"He doesn't look angry, does he?" I couldn't help asking.
"No," she said, sounding confused by my question. "Should he be?"
"I don't think he likes me," I confided. I still felt queasy. I put my head down on my
arm.
"The rathores don't like anybody'well, they don't notice anybody enough to like them.
But he's still staring at you."
"Stop looking at him," I hissed.
She snickered, but she looked away. I raised my head enough to make sure that she did,
contemplating violence if she resisted.
rahul interrupted us then ' he was planning an epic battle of the blizzard in the
parking lot after school and wanted us to join. riya agreed enthusiastically. The way
she looked at rahul left little doubt that she would be up for anything he suggested. I kept
silent. I would have to hide in the gym until the parking lot cleared.
For the rest of the lunch hour I very carefully kept my eyes at my own table. I decided
to honor the bargain I'd made with myself. Since he didn't look angry, I would go to
Biology. My stomach did frightened little flips at the thought of sitting next to him again.
I didn't really want to walk to class with rahul as usual ' he seemed to be a popular
target for the snowball snipers ' but when we went to the door, everyone besides me
groaned in unison. It was raining, washing all traces of the snow away in clear, icy
ribbons down the side of the walkway. I pulled my hood up, secretly pleased. I would be
free to go straight home after Gym.
rahul kept up a string of complaints on the way to building four.
Once inside the classroom, I saw with relief that my table was still empty. Mr. Banner
was walking around the room, distributing one microscope and box of slides to each
table. Class didn't start for a few minutes, and the room buzzed with conversation. I kept
my eyes away from the door, doodling idly on the cover of my notebook.
I heard very clearly when the chair next to me moved, but my eyes stayed carefully
focused on the pattern I was drawing.
"Hello," said a quiet, musical voice.
I looked up, stunned that he was speaking to me. He was sitting as far away from me as
the desk allowed, but his chair was angled toward me. His hair was dripping wet,
disheveled ' even so, he looked like he'd just finished shooting a commercial for hair
gel. His dazzling face was friendly, open, a slight smile on his flawless lips. But his eyes
were careful.
"My name is fateh singh rathore," he continued. "I didn't have a chance to introduce myself
last week. You must be annu mehra."
My mind was spinning with confusion. Had I made up the whole thing? He was
perfectly polite now. I had to speak; he was waiting. But I couldn't think of anything
conventional to say.
"H-how do you know my name?" I stammered.
He laughed a soft, enchanting laugh.
"Oh, I think everyone knows your name. The whole town's been waiting for you to
arrive."
I grimaced. I knew it was something like that.
Thankfully, Mr. Banner started class at that moment. I tried to concentrate as he
explained the lab we would be doing today. The slides in the box were out of order.
Working as lab partners, we had to separate the slides of onion root tip cells into the
phases of mitosis they represented and label them accordingly. We weren't supposed to
use our books. In twenty minutes, he would be coming around to see who had it right.
"Get started," he commanded.
"Ladies first, partner?" fateh asked. I looked up to see him smiling a crooked smile
so beautiful that I could only stare at him like an idiot.
"Or I could start, if you wish." The smile faded; he was obviously wondering if I was
mentally competent.
"No," I said, flushing. "I'll go ahead."
I was showing off, just a little. I'd already done this lab, and I knew what I was looking
for. It should be easy. I snapped the first slide into place under the microscope and
adjusted it quickly to the 40X objective. I studied the slide briefly.
My assessment was confident." Prophase."
"Do you mind if I look?" he asked as I began to remove the slide. His hand caught
mine, to stop me, as he asked. His fingers were ice-cold, like he'd been holding them in a
snowdrift before class. But that wasn't why I jerked my hand away so quickly. When he
touched me, it stung my hand as if an electric current had passed through us.
"I'm sorry," he muttered, pulling his hand back immediately. However, he continued to
reach for the microscope. I watched him, still staggered, as he examined the slide for an
even shorter time than I had.
"Prophase," he agreed, writing it neatly in the first space on our worksheet. He swiftly
switched out the first slide for the second, and then glanced at it cursorily.
"Anaphase," he murmured, writing it down as he spoke.
I kept my voice indifferent. "May I?"
He smirked and pushed the microscope to me.
I looked through the eyepiece eagerly, only to be disappointed. Dang it, he was right.
"Slide three?" I held out my hand without looking at him.
He handed it to me; it seemed like he was being careful not to touch my skin again.
I took the most fleeting look I could manage.
"Interphase." I passed him the microscope before he could ask for it. He took a swift
peek, and then wrote it down. I would have written it while he looked, but his clear,
elegant script intimidated me. I didn't want to spoil the page with my clumsy scrawl.
We were finished before anyone else was close. I could see rahul and his partner
comparing two slides again and again, and another group had their book open under the
table.
Which left me with nothing to do but try to not look at him' unsuccessfully. I glanced
up, and he was staring at me, that same inexplicable look of frustration in his eyes.
Suddenly I identified that subtle difference in his face.
"Did you get contacts?" I blurted out unthinkingly.
He seemed puzzled by my unexpected question. "No."
"Oh," I mumbled. "I thought there was something different about your eyes."
He shrugged, and looked away.
In fact, I was sure there was something different. I vividly remembered the flat black
color of his eyes the last time he'd glared at me ' the color was striking against the
background of his light dusky skin and his auburn hair. Today, his eyes were a completely
different color: a strange ocher, darker than butterscotch, but with the same golden tone. I
didn't understand how that could be, unless he was lying for some reason about the
contacts. Or maybe shimla was making me crazy in the literal sense of the word.
I looked down. His hands were clenched into hard fists again.
Mr. Banner came to our table then, to see why we weren't working. He looked over our
shoulders to glance at the completed lab, and then stared more intently to check the
answers.
"So, fateh, didn't you think annu should get a chance with the microscope?" Mr.
Banner asked.
"Actually, she identified three of the five." fateh said
Mr. Banner looked at me now; his expression was skeptical.
"Have you done this lab before?" he asked.
I smiled sheepishly. "Not with onion root."
"Whitefish blastula?"
"Yeah."
"well," he said after a moment, "I guess it's good you two are lab partners." He
mumbled something else as he walked away. After he left, I began doodling on my
notebook again.
"It's too bad about the snow, isn't it?" fateh asked. I had the feeling that he was
forcing himself to make small talk with me. Paranoia swept over me again. It was like he
had heard my conversation with riya at lunch and was trying to prove me wrong.
"Not really," I answered honestly, instead of pretending to be normal like everyone else.
I was still trying to dislodge the stupid feeling of suspicion, and I couldn't concentrate.
"You don't like the cold." It wasn't a question.
"Or the wet."
"shimla must be a difficult place for you to live," he mused.
"You have no idea," I muttered darkly.
He looked fascinated by what I said, for some reason I couldn't imagine. His face was
such a distraction that I tried not to look at it any more than courtesy absolutely
demanded.
"Why did you come here, then?"
No one had asked me that ' not straight out like he did, demanding.
"It's' complicated."
"I think I can keep up," he pressed.
I paused for a long moment, and then made the mistake of meeting his gaze. His dark
gold eyes confused me, and I answered without thinking.
"My mother got remarried," I said.
"That doesn't sound so complex," he disagreed, but he was suddenly sympathetic.
"When did that happen?"
"Last September." My voice sounded sad, even to me.
"And you don't like him," fateh surmised, his tone still kind.
"No, he is fine. Too young, maybe, but nice enough."
"Why didn't you stay with them?"
I couldn't fathom his interest, but he continued to stare at me with penetrating eyes, as if
my dull life's story was somehow vitally important.
"he travels a lot. He plays ball for a living." I half-smiled.
"Have I heard of him?" he asked, smiling in response.
"Probably not. He doesn't play well. Strictly minor league. He moves around a lot."
"And your mother sent you here so that she could travel with him." He said it as an
assumption again, not a question.
My chin raised a fraction." No, she did not send me here. I sent myself."
His eyebrows knit together. "I don't understand," he admitted, and he seemed
unnecessarily frustrated by that fact.
I sighed. Why was I explaining this to him? He continued to stare at me with obvious
curiosity.
"She stayed with me at first, but she missed him. It made her unhappy' so I decided it
was time to spend some quality time with avinash." My voice was glum by the time I
finished.
"But now you're unhappy," he pointed out.
"And?" I challenged.
"That doesn't seem fair." He shrugged, but his eyes were still intense.
I laughed without humor. "Hasn't anyone ever told you? Life isn't fair."
"I believe I have heard that somewhere before," he agreed dryly.
"So that's all," I insisted, wondering why he was still staring at me that way.
His gaze became appraising. "You put on a good show," he said slowly. "But I'd be
willing to bet that you're suffering more than you let anyone see."
I grimaced at him, resisting the impulse to stick out my tongue like a five-year-old, and
looked away.
"Am I wrong?"
I tried to ignore him.
"I didn't think so," he murmured smugly.
"Why does it matter to you ?" I asked, irritated. I kept my eyes away, watching the
teacher make his rounds.
"That's a very good question," he muttered, so quietly that I wondered if he was talking
to himself. However, after a few seconds of silence, I decided that was the only answer I
was going to get.
I sighed, scowling at the blackboard.
"Am I annoying you?" he asked. He sounded amused.
I glanced at him without thinking' and told the truth again." Not exactly. I'm more
annoyed at myself. My face is so easy to read ' my mother always calls me her open
book." I frowned.
"On the contrary, I find you very difficult to read." Despite everything that I'd said and
he'd guessed, he sounded like he meant it.
"You must be a good reader then," I replied.
"Usually." He smiled widely, flashing a set of perfect, ultrawhite teeth.
Mr. Banner called the class to order then, and I turned with relief to listen. I was in
disbelief that I'd just explained my dreary life to this bizarre, beautiful boy who may or
may not despise me. He'd seemed engrossed in our conversation, but now I could see,
from the corner of my eye, that he was leaning away from me again, his hands gripping
the edge of the table with unmistakable tension.
I tried to appear attentive as Mr. Banner illustrated, with transparencies on the overhead
projector, what I had seen without difficulty through the microscope. But my thoughts
were unmanageable.
When the bell finally rang, fateh rushed as swiftly and as gracefully from the room
as he had last Monday. And, like last Monday, I stared after him in amazement.
rahul skipped quickly to my side and picked up my books for me. I imagined him with
a wagging tail.
"That was awful," he groaned. "They all looked exactly the same. You're lucky you had
rathore for a partner."
"I didn't have any trouble with it," I said, stung by his assumption. I regretted the snub
instantly. "I've done the lab before, though," I added before he could get his feelings hurt.
"rathore seemed friendly enough today," he commented as we shrugged into our
raincoats. He didn't seem pleased about it.
I tried to sound indifferent. "I wonder what was with him last Monday."
I couldn't concentrate on rahul's chatter as we walked to Gym. didn't do much
to hold my attention, either. rahul was on my team today. He chivalrously covered my
position as well as his own, so my woolgathering was only interrupted when it was my
turn to serve; my team ducked warily out of the way every time I was up.
The rain was just a mist as I walked to the parking lot, but I was happier when I was in
the dry cab. I got the heater running, for once not caring about the mind-numbing roar of
the engine. I unzipped my jacket, put the hood down, and fluffed my damp hair out so the
heater could dry it on the way home.
I looked around me to make sure it was clear. That's when I noticed the still, white
figure. fateh was leaning against the front door of the Volvo, three cars down
from me, and staring intently in my direction. I swiftly looked away and threw the truck
into reverse, almost hitting a rusty Toyota Corolla in my haste. Lucky for the Toyota, I
stoped on the brake in time. I took a deep breath, still looking out the other side of my car, and cautiously pulled out again, with greater success. I stared straight ahead as I passed the Volvo,but from a peripheral peek, I would swear I saw him laughing.
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Edited by kiran_89 - 11 years ago
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