For Pearl Grey : About Realism - Page 2

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koolsadhu1000 thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#11
lotus 8
My mother hailed from a landlord family [ very wealthy , they owned a whole village] and i spent many summers in village in Goa . I have seen tradition , chauvinism , and belief in caste from very near . They showed this Kayasth Thakur controversy ............I have seen the Brahmin and other caste controversies over wedding proposals. All the things that Pratigya has done .......like refusing to change name , sleep with husband , threatening to leave the house , bedroom secrets in open , constant bickering , wud land a woman in deep , deep trouble . Her maayka wud be ostracized by community and no one wud marry the daughters of that family . All her wins were possible coz the husband she thought was a beast constantly supported her and spoke out aloud in her defence at the cost of being labelled a joru ka gulaam by the chauvinistic rural community he lived in .He did this without shame , without ego . Yet he is branded as an egoist as he sometimes talks what his Dad does just for the heck of it while conversing with his friends . The truth is he is much more egoless than any normal man living in that kind of community . Life for the woman wud be hell in such a household , however spunky she is . Even the poor or lower caste people wud snicker at her coz in this ingrained value all are the same in such communities........that a woman who does not have a proper marraige with her husband desrves no respect is the mentality ......of both , rich or poor , upper caste or lower caste .
I am not saying this is right or wrong I am merely saying this will happen in reality .
nikitagmc thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#12
Hi kools

Surprised to see me here? Actually I bumped into this forum, and now that I had come in, I thought lets see if Kools writes some sort of commentary here. Instead I ended up on this topic. Excellent post as usual.

I know somewhat a summary of the story, and I do not watch it (the 'reality' unfortunately is too too too depressing at the end of the day for me to handle- just my views- I understand many people like this serial) but your post was very nice about how Pratigya's victory is actually due to her husband. (such a nice thought this is). I think the day some character points this fact to Pratigya, that day she will start falling in love with her husband, so this won't really come so soon.

I agree with your idea that the lead should not be glorified to the extent that people start copying her actions without practical considerations. Unfortunately TV people never take this thing seriously.

Overall, what you wrote about reality and all was very sad, but it forced me to think and rethink. It is so sad to know that women in India actually go through this much. I know domestic abuse and all happen, but never had I thought that the situation was so horrific that women suffer daily- I always thought it happens usually sometimes cos men cannot handle their egos after fights or cos of dowry matters. It is scary to think that people actually live in relationships only for sex and all without any sensitivity for their wives AT ALL. If it was a villain (like ajit in PR) it wouldn't have affected me so much, but when you say all this happens in UP, Bihar, it is downright depressing. (I guess I am still a child in many ways). I guess that is why I cannot watch this serial even if I try, (I tried at home) the way a few men have been portrayed in the serial absolutely scares me- as if mocking- see, this is the real side of men. Scary thought, hai na?

Enough of my ramblings. Sorry for those who got bored, actually couldn't help commenting on kools post. This is basically a general thought that came to my mind always after I came to know about sajjan singh's family in the serial.
koolsadhu1000 thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#13
Dear Niki Im so happy to see U here commenting on my post ..I urge u to see PRatigya.
I will answer u later coz Im leaving to go outside for sum work . LUB U .
damon_biteme thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#14
Hi Kools,

I wait to read your posts. Wonderful post and i do hope the creatives read this post and take a gud look at what they have been trying to potray since Krishna's and Pratigyas wedding. I agree it was good of the creatives to highlight the social issue but the solutions to those are far from reality. You said it correct the impressionable young girls can idolize Pratigya and make rash decisions like that. We seen people copy their idols.

After the wedding I was also expecting a similar things like the movie 'Mirch Masala'. I was expecting that the women of the house would get together to fight against the chauvanistic attitude of the house and that Ghanti Dadi would eventually join in too.

I think the creatives are confused abt the lead character. I want the cv's to show that Pratigya starts assessing the circumstances, situations, the person she is dealing with and come up with startegies to deal with everyone in the thakur family including her husband.

an_jaani thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#15
i dont know what goes on in india.....never been to india but love the culture and tradition...never lived in a corrupt system...saxsena family most of the time are so helpless .....if this happens to a person( who isnt strong in real life ) i am sure he or she would commit suicide ..... but love this show it has some of the great actors in it
Edited by an_jaani - 14 years ago
nikitagmc thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#16
Kools, this reality is scary. If I watch this serial, I may gradually end up drawing a wrong impression of men from the 'reality' shown- it is psychological, cos somewhere these serials leave an impression on us.. You know, I like serials that give some hope, show some positivity- like Manav used to give me hope that there are good, egoless men, for whom love and respect is higher than carnal desires- he respected Archana and waited for her to get comfortable with his touch. (this is only about the beginning of PR- not the current mess, maybe right now I can give Satish's example.). Not very realistic but at least you get to dream.

Now Pratigya, excellent though it is- is very disturbing. It shows that there are beasts within men which are uncontrollable. And they freely abound in many places. When I watch a serial, I think a lot about it. And I really don't want to mould my thinking according to the men shown in Pratigya. Reading your post however was very informative and sort of eye-opener, something that will keep me warned about such reality, but will keep me grounded and not draw conclusions from what is shown in the serial. Hopefully, from time to time, I will keep hopping on this forum.

PS: I don't know if you all understood what I was trying to explain. My friends know I'm a bit psychic.. hehehehe
rad4dev thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#17
Kools...I agree with you..I am from a small village in India and I had faced eve-teasing a lot and even stalkers..It's mainly because only 2 gals used to go to college from our place. We didn't even have proper transportation..so in buses, bus stops eveywhere I used to face these problems....i too had faced so many issues with one of my stalker..I remember some incident related to pink saree issue in Pratigya..the way she wore the saree..i used to get some letters in which he asked me to wear some orange dress..i didn't wear any kind of orange shade for one year..one guy even produced some false evidences to prove that I liked him..one guy sent me proposal to home saying that I too like him..to tell the truth I never ever talked to any of these guys..my mom used to get scared of all these incidents..but I never cared..i have my parents support that's what mattered to me and concentarted on my studies, now I even did Master's in US...

gosh I never thought I will marry that guy to teach him a lesson..if every gal thinks like that more than 50% of the gals in rural India should marry their stalkers..the best solution is to IGNORE them ...I am writing my experience here just to tell the reality..many young girls might think what Pratigya did was great..but it's just stupidity marring a STALKER..if she is really strong she shouldn'tt have married him in the first place..

Pearl Grey took a very realistic problem but the way she tackled the problem is wrong..may b she should have shown Pratigya strong before marriage and not willing to marry...after slap incident I never got sympathy on Pratigya..I felt her as more arrogant than confident..I felt Krishna is the one who is suffering more emotionally...

--Hope-- thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#18
Kools:

Let me start of saying I agree with you and every other person who has posted on this thread.

Stalking is a very prominent social evil in India. Has existed, does exist and will continue to exist for a while, in my opinion. I mentioned in another thread of mine (Social Evil or Social Issue) that the social evil was the bait that pearl grey used to lure us to the story however that is the not the focus of the show because the evil was left unresolved and dealt with in a most dissatisactory and uunrealistic manner.

My very close friend was brought up with me in Mumbai. She was the only girl in her family to go to a convent school (a privelige in her family and her community). for the most part she was a bold girl but totally aware of her reality and the fact that her education was a privelege. When we finished 10th she left for a vacation to her hometown Bihar which is very very similar to UP (both being neighbouring states). I never heard from her for a few years after that. I followed up with her parents and they told me that she was stalked while on vacation by an obsessive younger son of a thakur (sounds familiar - but my friend's story is real) and when she refused to marry the dude he told her that he would kill himself. when that did not work he told her he would destroy her physically if she did not marry him. she got afraid, lived in a small village and out of real fear she married him. her life was miserable after that. her mom confided in me alot. she was beaten by this guy who supposedly loved her to death, she got pregnant within the 1st year of marriage and she was only allowed to visit her parents when they visited Bihar. When her son became 3 years old, she somehow managed to convince him to let her come to bombay to visit her folks. I guess she played some cards right because he agreed. she came and refused to go back. he followed her to mumbai and tried to strong arm her and beat her. Long story short the police got involved, he had to be strong armed by her father's men in mumbai and they ended up divorcing and she retained custody of the child (I don't know how he allowed her to do the later - this was the most chauvinistic dude you have ever met even though unlike Krishna he was educated upto the 12th grade). My memories of my friend before she left was of this compassionate, fun loving bold and jovial girl. she came back a shell, completed her university education and now works for a travel agent (I am so proud of her). it took her years to gain her sanity, lose her fear and get bold again.

Real life pratigya would be my firend. So in that respect a much needed realism of the environment she lives in is required in this show.

So let's talk about why I love this show and why today's epi has forever made me a big fan of the creatives.

I love this show because all the lead characters are flawed. each and everyone of them. they are a mixed bundle of good and bad.

Krishna is aggressive and hot headed but what makes him endearing is that he is blunt, transparent and really really loves his wife.

Pratigya is uncompromising, idealistic and more often than not very haughty in her demeanour but what makes her endearing is that she is compassionate (to kesar, amma and even her own family member and sometimes unwillingly to Krishna) she is intelligent (except where it comes to Krishna - see how she helped kesar and how she was tactful with Adarsh and Komal).

Professor is idealistic, lacks a basic grasp of reality and is weak but what makes even this poor soul endearing is his love for his family, his liberal upbringing of his daughters, and his love, understanding and genuine concern for a very intolerant Komal.

I can go on and on but I think I have given sufficient examples.

I honestly believe the CV's read this site and take note of our expectations. I mentioned once in an early thread of mine (Understanding Krishna, Pratigy and Kriya) that kriya will only move from Krishna's imagination and become a reality if both the leads are taken away from their familial environment and allowed to see one another in a indvidualistic light. With this absurd yet highly entertaining track the CV's have given us a promise of things to come.

So CV's if your listening, I have a wish list (if I may be so bold):

a) show the realism that is required for Pratigya to maintain her identity yet radicalize the plight of women in that household. show ingenuity in your solutions not a surreal idealistic solution.

b) show the relationship between the two strengthening. no dramatic role reversals because then the chemistry will die. each character must maintain their flaws yet enhance their strengths and endearing qualities to attract the other inspite of their flaws. I will not give examples because today's show is proof that the CV's get it.πŸ˜ƒπŸ˜ƒπŸ˜ƒπŸ˜ƒ

c) show as much friction as you want between the lead couple (adds to chemistry and entertainment) but show them standing united and defending the other unquestioningly when challenged or mocked by others (irrespective of whether it is angad or dadi or ss or shakti or komal or arushi or adarsh or amma )

Just remember today you have gained my deepest admiration.


Hope
--Hope-- thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#19
Krishna and pratigya totally killed me today.

this track is so entertaining.

he praises himself in sucha matter of fact manner. it si funny to watch and listen. he was so proud that he made the connection between astrology and numerology. I was proud of him too.

then he was proud when he sold of his ring and bought her tea supplies. awww so sweet. but he did not tell her how he bought it because he wants her to trust his word. that is all he has. his word. no education. no career. no money. just his word. its the most valuable thing he has and he wants her to rely on it.

she was very sweet when she gave that exasperated look (so like a woman who thinks that her man did not really understand her point in an argumentπŸ˜†πŸ˜† I know I have don it a few times), then she makes him tea (so sweet - belive me the look he gave her he could just live on tea for the rest of his life in that tabeela - fresh air and teaπŸ˜†πŸ˜†πŸ˜†) then she says shukriya when she sees the blank look on his face after the thank you. that was the best part she did not treat him condesendingly because he does not know english but she treated him like a human being (someone who needs to understand they are being thanked no matter what language she uses). I give her full points climbing down just a little from her ivory tower.

ok some funny observations.

the dude is giving her this philosphical talk when she is having her hide bitten raw by the bugs. OMG she kept quiet if it was me I would probably have given him dagger looks all through the convo. πŸ˜†πŸ˜†

she kept splashing water. how long soes it take to wash your face woman. and God alone knows how many dead mosquitoes where in that water. I thought she was going to have a bath standing right there

Then the dude trades a ring to get tea patti. Mr. Clueless you pawn the ring then take the money and then buy supplies beyond the patti. pagla gaya hai. wonder what the whole paying for supplies is going to do to his alpha male reputation eh? sure the CV's will show a negative effect later. realistically that is what will happen. for now let's enjoy the foolosihness a little longer

at this rate they can survive a week or two. she has tons of jewellery, he has one more ring, a chain and a earring. after that they can sell Chandu. he is not as useful as Tunna. I actually like Tunna way more, he steps so bravely in the sherni's den. he has learnt nothing from her skirmish with Krishna.πŸ˜†



Edited by stillhopeful - 14 years ago
--Hope-- thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#20

Originally posted by: nikitagmc

Hi kools

Surprised to see me here? Actually I bumped into this forum, and now that I had come in, I thought lets see if Kools writes some sort of commentary here. Instead I ended up on this topic. Excellent post as usual.

I know somewhat a summary of the story, and I do not watch it (the 'reality' unfortunately is too too too depressing at the end of the day for me to handle- just my views- I understand many people like this serial) but your post was very nice about how Pratigya's victory is actually due to her husband. (such a nice thought this is). I think the day some character points this fact to Pratigya, that day she will start falling in love with her husband, so this won't really come so soon.

I agree with your idea that the lead should not be glorified to the extent that people start copying her actions without practical considerations. Unfortunately TV people never take this thing seriously.

Overall, what you wrote about reality and all was very sad, but it forced me to think and rethink. It is so sad to know that women in India actually go through this much. I know domestic abuse and all happen, but never had I thought that the situation was so horrific that women suffer daily- I always thought it happens usually sometimes cos men cannot handle their egos after fights or cos of dowry matters. It is scary to think that people actually live in relationships only for sex and all without any sensitivity for their wives AT ALL. If it was a villain (like ajit in PR) it wouldn't have affected me so much, but when you say all this happens in UP, Bihar, it is downright depressing. (I guess I am still a child in many ways). I guess that is why I cannot watch this serial even if I try, (I tried at home) the way a few men have been portrayed in the serial absolutely scares me- as if mocking- see, this is the real side of men. Scary thought, hai na?

Enough of my ramblings. Sorry for those who got bored, actually couldn't help commenting on kools post. This is basically a general thought that came to my mind always after I came to know about sajjan singh's family in the serial.



Nikki darling:

how are u? really miss your debates these days. u must come on her and provide ocmments even if you only read written updates

Hope
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