For Pearl Grey : About Realism

I wish to congratulate Pearl Grey as I admire her very much for coming up with a realistic show like Pratigya . We viewers were tired of the fake niceties and bookish idealism shown in other shows that we hardly encounter in real life . Pratigya was REAL and made us sit up . And WATCH . . I , as a viewer watch Pratigya for its stark realism . It is refreshing . The two families portrayed r real . The North Indian small town culture is real . The atmosphere is real , the language is real . The sense of humor and violence is real . The eveteasing , the stalking shown was real ........most of all , the corruption and chauvinism shown was real . So real , that it was disturbing . . However what was unreal was the way shown to deal with that chauvinism. If in real life women living in similiar atmospheres in India try to deal with that chauvinism or stalking in the way that the lead heroine , Pratigya does , they will end up DEAD or brutally RAPED in one day . . And so I as a viewer say to creatives that show the dealing with the burning issues in a REAL manner too . . If in real life , a woman decides to marry the man she thought was her stalker to teach him a lesson ...........she wud be raped daily if she refused him physical intimicacy as stalkers hardly have consciences . If she back sassed the Thakur mentality people the way Pratigya is shown doing , she would be subjected to horrific domestic violence and perhaps end up in a hospital all broken and unrecognisable for life . Her Education and spirit would NOT be able to help her a bit . The corruption in India is irreparable and its high time we view it as a reality and not dismiss it off by showing it can be dealt with with sheer 'spirit' or 'spunk' . .

Young women in their naivete may try to emulate Pratigya and end up losing their dignities and lives if they decide to marry their stalkers and 'teach' them lessons by refusing them sex and torturing them emotionally . The equation of life is simple........those who are in a position can perhaps 'teach' lessons........Those who are not , CANNOT . A woman who has no financial independence , political contacts ,police contacts , influential relatives CANNOT teach a person who has ALL this and more any kind of lesson . Spirit and education will be tossed out of the window.

But I understand .This is a commercial project and the idea is to make it commercially very succesful by showing drama blended with realism . The drama element is the mills and Boons type of love story between two unlike characters put together for the wrong reasons in a marraige , and the spirited heroine is the hook for women audience while the grey unpredictable hero is the perfect foil for making women hearts beat . And so I request Pearl Grey that now that you have shown all this and made this show a huge commercial success , for the sake of young women who watch this show with youthful naivete , put in some reality checks via dialogues so that if they decide to emulate Pratigya they wud stop and re think their decision . Please , please show it via any dialogue , via any grey character ,,,,,be it KOmal , Dadi or Naina telling Pratigya that her so called Winning Spree seemed succesful only because her so called stalker Krishna had a conscience and he indulged her all along . Not just that , he supported her in her every win .......be it not wanting to change the name , saving Kesar's baby , allowing her virginity to remain intact for so many days...........had it been Shakti or Angad , Pratigya would have lost her virginity a long time back . Infact we see forced marital rape in the bedroom of Shakti and Kesar when Kesar complains that her hand is hurt ........Shakti does not pay any attention to it . That is Reality for us viewers . It is Pratigya's immense luck that she encountered a so called stalker with a conscience and women out there may not be so lucky . So U owe it to them to give them a reality check via a dialogue where Pratigya is brought down to earth and made to realise her immense LUCK that all her wINNING was based on Krishna's individuality , that he took all those punishments as he was Krishna and NOT Shakti or Angad . That Her Win is not really Her win ALONE .

I made this suggestion as I as a woman feel for the thousands of innocent , youthful women out there in the same predicament . Life in UP and Bihar and life in Mumbai or Bangalore is vastly different . A movie called Gangajal had tried to show the realism of North Indian life and the corruption there . We see the same life in Pratigya. No woman should try to do foolish bravado and end up raped or dead is my ardent wish and so I strongly request this reallity check dialogue that she won because it was Krishna she married .

I also have objection to the techniques employed by the heroine Pratigya to 'teach' a man a lesson . Contempt , Hate , rudeness , insults to his manhood , playing hard to get , are more capable of bringing out the beast in a man instead of subduing it . If a woman values her life and dignity , she should NOT use these dangerous ways of egging a man on to becoming a beast . We see Krishna attempting to rape her only once by losing his temper and catching her throat twice perhaps .........but I repeat , she got LUCKY that it was this less . Reality is far more gruesome . It is NOT good to tamper with a man's psyche and bring the beast out in him . Krishna is a gunda , even normal men end up murdering their wives [ see the cases in India] if egged on like this . The beast in a man can be subdued through love , not hatred .

I decided to post this coz both Pearl Grey and the writer ShantiBhushan stressed on the realism element . I do not suggest this because I want Krishna glorified as he is 'handsome' . Personally I find the actor average looking but his acting talents are stupendous . So many women watching this show and an actress on the podium of Star Parivaar Awards [ Shweta Tiwari ] publicly glorified the character Pratigya as being a hope of some sorts for women . I disagreed the moment I saw that speech . I understand that Pratigya's sprit is necessary for the commercial success of the show but that done , I wish a reality check for Pratigya via a dialogue stressing on Krishna's conscience and individuality so that women watching her as a role model are WARNED of her luck . This would blend in with the realism element Pearl Grey talked about .

There was a movie by Ketan Mehta called Mirch Masala which dealt with crass chauvinism in India where uneducated village women working in a small factory drying red chillies and making chilli powder come together and present a UNITED front against chauvinism which was more believable . If we see Pratigya opting to stay WITHIN the marraige and trying to change the women's mentality in accepting chauvinistic roles doled out to them in their personal equation with their husbands it would be more believable and real . I have mentioned this many times that I would love to see ALL women of the house coming and standing behind Amma and removing SajjansIngh's hand with a unified effort when he holds his wife's hand cruelly in hot milk as a punishment . I would like to see Pratigya informing Kesar's influential and rich maayka about her torture and bringing them in intelligently to make Shakti answerable for his deeds and giving Sajjan Singh a rude awakening that just as his Komal is the apple of HIS eye , Kesar is valued by HER father and HER brothers . I would like to see Pratigya winning in getting Shakti attached to the very child he wanted aborted although it is a GIRL CHILD . These wins would be so real .

Lastly I end this post by congratulating Pearl Grey for all the awards her serial Pratigya got . She talked about uncurbed creativity in her interview .........and we see what original , unrestricted creativity can do with a serial's success story compared to typified FORMULA.

Note : This post is not intended to 'hurt' the feelings of Pratigya supporters at all and I don't wish to debate with them on the validity of my beliefs as they are my personal opinions . It is intended for the creatives of this show if they take notice of this forum . And yes , for those who will agree with this post , please click the like button and answer as a joint effort will have a greater impact .😊

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Those who agree .........comment please so that creatives take notice of us

I wana thank PEARL AUNTY for giving us ARHAAN BEHLL a diamond which was dunno hiden where:(

people like me from the western part of the world have seen some of what you pointed out via indian movies..but now since we are able to view indian television via cable and internet...we have come to learn about much more problems affecting the average indian on a daily basis...eve teasing being one of them....i never knew a problem such as this ever existed in that part of the world....i applaude the creators of this show for highlighting this problem..but i also want to endorse what you said that they went about it the wrong way in dealing with the problem...i think that not enough research was done by the creators of this serial to really show the viewers how the heroine was going to tackle the problem she was faced with....what they could've shown was pratigya doing battle with her emotions and eventually giving in and getting married to krishna....not for revenge but for love and then show them as a united force fighting against the likes of angard....the way they both know how..him by being street smart and her by her educational background....that would have been more in keeping with the reality of the issues....the later part of the show could be where pratigya tames krishna's family aggressiveness and krishna in turn teaching pratigya's family to stand up for themselves and show a little aggressiveness...😃

I agree with Fifi...both Krishna and Pratigya cud help each other .

the only unreal part of this serial is the remdy shown to tackle chauvinism

However what was unreal was the way shown to deal with that chauvinism. If in real life women living in similiar atmospheres in India try to deal with that chauvinism or stalking in the way that the lead heroine , Pratigya does , they will end up DEAD or brutally RAPED in one day . Kool Sadhu: Good to see u back . As always, I agree with most of the things you talk about. For a longtime I have been meaning to write what you have written in your post- copied and pasted above in red. In real life, Partigya would have been raped the first night and all nights/days after that by her husband no matter if she had loved or not loved, no matter if she had wanted/ not wanted sex, whethershe is feeling good or not, it would not have mattered. The reality shown is the life of Kesar. In real sense Partigya marrying in SS family would have meant suicide of her education, her values, her thinking. She would not have left SS family even after being hit by any male/female member of the house because of the shame that would bring to her parents by her that very action. She would have been confused and torn between what she learnt at her parent's house and what she has to deal with in SS family. However for the story's sake, even if it is to teach other young girls to stand up, they have to stand up for not marrying where they will not be respected and to stand up for their right to education and job.

However, I agree with what Komal has been going through and the transition she is in, it seems so real. Her crude acts in Saxena family to vent out her anger also are close to reality.

Originally posted by: lotus8

However what was unreal was the way shown to deal with that chauvinism. If in real life women living in similiar atmospheres in India try to deal with that chauvinism or stalking in the way that the lead heroine , Pratigya does , they will end up DEAD or brutally RAPED in one day . Kool Sadhu: Good to see u back . As always, I agree with most of the things you talk about. For a longtime I have been meaning to write what you have written in your post- copied and pasted above in red. In real life, Partigya would have been raped the first night and all nights/days after that by her husband no matter if she had loved or not loved, no matter if she had wanted/ not wanted sex, whethershe is feeling good or not, it would not have mattered. The reality shown is the life of Kesar. In real sense Partigya marrying in SS family would have meant suicide of her education, her values, her thinking. She would not have left SS family even after being hit by any male/female member of the house because of the shame that would bring to her parents by her that very action. She would have been confused and torn between what she learnt at her parent's house and what she has to deal with in SS family. However for the story's sake, even if it is to teach other young girls to stand up, they have to stand up for not marrying where they will not be respected and to stand up for their right to education and job.

However, I agree with what Komal has been going through and the transition she is in, it seems so real. Her crude acts in Saxena family to vent out her anger also are close to reality.

So u have seen small town life in UP lotus8 . No wonder u understood me .......The Thakurs etc from those kind of regions r nothing less than sicilian mafias in family mentality ..........they wont tolerate such glares , back talks and attitude for a single second is the blunt , bitter truth . No woman living there shud copy the lead is my only point as she will land in danger .

Yes Kool Sadhu. To some extent I have seen it . Though I live in US but I am a person who is always interested in knowing different cultures and religions and undertsatnding the personalities based on that. That is one reason I look forward to your mails doing psycho-analysis. For this show I completely understand your point of view and agree with you on it. My interaction with UP life and the caste system existing there was very challenging for me as growing up in India, and reading about it I some how never realized its existence was so deep rooted. Found out later in my life and that's what attracted me to this serial as it was portrayed very well. However, the female lead character some how got confused in the creatives mind as it is far from the reality existing in UP/Bihar.