Reserved...updated.
This take is going to encompass the last three episodes (Thursday, Friday and Monday) ' they kind of flow together and, in a way, I'm glad I got to watch all three in one shot due to all the traveling I did the last weekend. The picture is becoming a little clearer and a few things that had been kind of tingling at the back of my mind suddenly made a little more sense.
Overall, I liked all three episodes though the scenes between Khushi and Aarav in the toy shop were a tad stretched for me. I felt Monday's was the best episode in terms of presentation and pacing. I'm constantly surprised that the team that gave us today's episode also managed to give us last Wednesday's sloppy and badly executed one ' I guess it's all part of our show's charm and we need to learn to take it in stride and move on when it happens. Knowing there is the possibility of a rainbow around the corner seems to work in the show's favour 😊
Let me first talk a little about the equation between Arnv and Khushi post re-marriage. I've loved all their interactions (barring a few scenes of Khushi in the cinema hall which were frankly OTT and way too unrealistic for me). Arnav Singh Raizada has been a huge revelation for me since the re-marriage. Don't get me wrong - he is still completely true to character and has not changed in any fundamental way but he has turned out to be a lot more patient, easy going, laidback and indulgent with Khushi as a husband. We have never before been privileged to see how ASR would behave in a relationship where his heart was involved - now we know. I love how he indulges Khushi (so quick to give in to taking her to a Hindi film as opposed to the Derby or even an English film), how he takes all her crazy antics in stride (his reaction when she did her Hollywood actress act for him in the presentation room ' he scolded her quite mildly for him and then immediately melted once he realized what her intentions were and proceeded to flirt with her), how he unabashedly enjoys her childish and adorable ways (watching her replay the bashing she supposedly gave the goons with the sabzi with a smile in his eyes and his expression when she gave the jagruk nari speech to his family and preened at Anjali assuring NK that he would be safe with Khushi at the sabzi mandi), how much he appreciates every little thing that Khushi does for him (the breakfast in bed and the candle she lit with the jalebis he'd worked so hard to make as an apology for her), how he un-selfconsciously allows the little boy in him to peep out in her presence (I was upset today and decided to do what you do when you're upset and Khushi, where is my gift? I hope you didn't forget it in your gussa) and how openly he shows his love for her and his appreciation at having her in his life. He does get justifiably angry when Khushi manages to hit his sore spots (the possibility of losing her due to how she always throws herself into whatever fray is happening around her and takes impulsive risks without thinking of the consequences) and hurt when he feels that she does not understand the only expectation that he has of her (not wishing him or fussing over him on his birthday or wanting to spend time exclusively with him) but he is very reasonable even in his anger and hurt (none of the biting cutting words that he used to such devastating effect in his previous interactions with her) and quick to calm down once he's gotten the message across and realizes how contrite she is. I also love how he never sulks quietly but is forthright with her about his disappointment, hurt or expectation and then moves on without holding any grudges ' a quality in a partner absolutely worth its value in gold as anyone who's experienced a relationship will agree with me 😆 He is the first one to reach out and try to resolve the issue when they have a disagreement even when he knows he is not the one at fault - again, a beautiful quality that tells us so much about ASR and how much he loves his Khushi.
Moving onto Khushi ' she has also been a revelation for me post re-marriage. I'm glad that she is still very much her own person and hasn't reverted to playing the traditional role of a rich man's indulged wife. She is very much the old Khushi but freed of shackles and worries ' all the obstacles to a bright and happy future with the man she loves and who loves her back have been cleared. Yet, I sense a disquiet in her, almost a hidden and probably a subconscious one that leads to her acting out in her own unique way. Just like she cannot stay quiet for too long since she feels the stillness of the world around her, she seems to not be able to be still and just spend some time alone with her husband who just wants to shower her with some attention ' it is almost as if she dare not take even a small break from her frenetic pace of activities or her hidden fear will rise to the surface and she will not be able to shove it down and move on. This is something that I've been sensing for a while now ' it was kept in check while there were big issues to deal with like revealing Shyam to Anjali and being a pillar of strength to Arnav as they went through the process of outing Shyam.
This subconscious disquiet I sense in her has nothing to do with not understanding ASR's expectations of their relationship. She may not have a good handle on that yet but, on the other hand, she does understand him at his core - his insecurities, his weaknesses, the full effect of the past on him, his strength and his heart (once she calmed down in his mother's garden, she was quick to reassure him that she wasn't going anywhere ' she understood the essential nature of his anger and worry very well and she's always known exactly how to reassure him and make him feel better ' a fact, he openly acknowledged to her the night of their wedding). My take on this is that she will have a lifetime to find out, understand and give him what he expects of their relationship (it will come with experience) but her understanding of the complex and complicated man that ASR is, is priceless ' it is something that has always come instinctively to her, something that she didn't need to learn and something that possibly cannot be learned. So, why does Khushi act up so much with Arnav? Why does the Khushi who is able to empathize so much with complete strangers not allow the man she loves so much any leeway with her? At first, I thought it was a feeling of security ' of knowing that you were loved back immensely and unconditionally. We have never during the lifetime of the show ever seen anyone indulge Khushi this much or even have any circumstances where Khushi felt the complete freedom to be demanding in any way. She was always dealing with issues ' the aftermath of coming to Delhi due to the revelation of the fashion show tapes, being the only breadwinner for the family, trying to hold the family together while dealing with her own private demons after Babuji's attack, dealing silently with ASR's rejections and the thought of marriage to Shyam, Shyam's truth and the decision to keep it from the Raizadas while dealing with the repercussions of Payal being married into the very same family that they'd decided to keep Shyam's dirty secret from, the forced marriage and its repercussions on her family, ASR's family and the equation with ASR, dealing with Shyam's unwanted attentions, ASR's accusations about Shyam and his leaving for London and finally, his kidnapping and her struggle to bring him home safely while not being able to let anyone know about the truth. She tends to take on the burdens of her loved ones on her own shoulders and has never felt completely free to do as she likes and nor has there been anyone who indulges her like ASR ' maybe her Babuji did when he was well and we've been given some hints about it though probably not to the extent that ASR does. Being a wife and a much loved one at that should have opened the world out to Khushi ' instead, we see her indulging in very un-Khushi like tantrums that Arnav then indulges by trying to pacify her with a combination of his signature teasing, flirting, challenging and newly added ones of reasoning with her and showing her his love for her by his actions ' be it going to the effort of making jalebis for her or trussing her up and taking her to his mother's garden and bowing his head in respect and letting her know how special she is and how he think she is a much better person than him. I've been thinking about this since this aspect of Khushi has been played out on our screens and it finally struck me that perhaps I'd been reading it worng ' it is not security in Arnav's love that makes her behave like this, it is the very opposite ' her insecurity in his love, in the extent of his feelings for her or more precisely, in the permanence of his feelings for her. She is not calculating or manipulative but is subconsciously testing the boundaries of their relationship ' almost as if to see what she can get way with when it comes to Arnav and at what point will he explode and revert back to the shaitaan from the raajkumar. It's possible Arnav understands this and this is his way of letting her know he is going nowhere and his feelings for her will not be affected no matter what - not sure of this bit from Arnav..will need to watch it play out.
To understand this, we need to take a look at the entire relationship between Arnav and Khushi from Khushi's point of view. It starts with Arnav saying cutting and wounding words to Khushi, usually unfair ones at that, and that too while his eyes and his body language are at odds with his words and behaviour. Then he eventually softens up and uses the strong physical attraction that exists between them (here too, he is at an advantage since he can identify the physical attraction between them for what it is while Khushi is just unnerved and unable to give a name to their sizzling chemistry) to draw her to him and finally when she is about to succumb/realize that there is something between them, he rejects her and usually does so very cruelly - ASR is busy trying to convince himself more than her that there is nothing between them'that there cannot be but that is something that she doesn't understand or see ' all she sees is a man rejecting her after drawing her closer to him. Khushi then goes into her shell, internalizes her pain and comes back out stronger and determined to avoid ASR but ASR is unable to let go off her and misses no opportunity to say biting things when he does meet her. Things are terrible between them until a chance opportunity changes the dynamics of their relationship and they eventually get back at an even keel - a volatile one where even a wrong word could set fire to a conflagration but still a temporary truce of sorts. Then, the whole vicious cycle repeats itself. This happened when they first met and culminated in the Diwali missed kiss, where ASR then runs off like the hounds of hell are after him and impulsively declares in front of the the family and crowd that he wants to marry Lavanya all the while watching Khushi's reaction to his announcement and then finally and devastatingly rejects her with his words on the verandah of her house when she runs after him to thank him for bringing her purse back. Khushi is devastated and tries to move on after making some very painful decisions and then is gobsmacked at his reaction to her news of being enagaged. She asks him very poignantly ' aap, kya chahte hai humse? Am I not already giving you what you asked me for...I have made my peace with it..so why are you behaving this way. ASR goes berserk and we see the cruel side of him all roiled up with jealousy and unhappiness and trying to make her admit farak padta hai which he thankfully stops when he realizes what he is doing to her and himself in his mad rage but not before before planting some substantial wounds on Khushi. Things cool down while they work together to get Payal and Akash together and he breaks up with Lavanya. Then, the advent of NK, makes ASR repeat the entire vicious cycle. He says cutting things to her in his jealousy, regrets it, does all the running after her using the substantial physical attraction they share (my husband very memorably stated during this phase, that ASR ran after Khushi like a sexy puppy dog) and right when she is finally brought to believe that he has some feelings for her, she is faced with his ruthless blackmail and the humiliating demand for a temporary six month marriage. My heart broke for Khushi when she covered her face with her hands and cried after she accepted his demands. Then followed the marriage and Khushi's abandonment by her family and the alienation from his family while from Khushi's perspective, ASR's life continued as previously with a few minor wrinkles. The wounding and hurtful behaviour from ASR and their fights continued until Khushi made a resolve to try and get out of the marriage by irritating ASR. Things calmed down a little but ASR's hot and cold behaviour towards her continued ' holi and the aftermath, Heer Ranjha and the aftermath and finally living in the Gupta house where Khushi didn't know whether she was coming or going with his constant cycle of softening towards her and then pushing her away from him. The attempted suicide (which is the only thing in the entire show that I just couldn't swallow apart from Khushi bringing back Shyam back for Anjali) would have made a little more sense if they showed Khushi driven to it by the constant cycle of rejection and hurt. We notice that every time ASR rejects Khushi, he has to work that much harder next time to convince her to that he is truly softening towards her. That kind of repeated rejection does something to a woman's psyche ' any woman but especially one that is barely even starting to comprehend what her feelings for ASR might mean. That is why Khushi kept attempting to leave ASR for Di, for his own happiness, for his family's happiness...in fact, for all sort of assorted reasons ' at some level, she didn't want to wait for the cycle to end and wanted to remove herself from further rejection. It was partly responsible for her not believing that their marriage was complete, not wanting to take their relationship any further and running away from his physical advances. ASR, at some level, does understand that and verbalized it to some extent on their bachelor party night. I'm one of the minority that believe that they just kissed that night and made out a little but didn't go all the way because ASR was very aware of his treatment of her in the past and Khushi's belief system and would never have asked that of her, especially since he knew how hard it had been for him to get her to finally trust him. Also, asking for it one night before the marriage he worked so hard to give her made absolutely no sense - he'd waited 6 months and he couldn't wait one ore night! I'd also thought that if ASR had been late to the mandap and Khushi had left, something would have broken inside her because he would have proven the unholy cycle of their relationship she so dreaded true again in her mind and rejected her yet again. If that had happened, I'm not sure how ASR would have been able to convince Khushi of his feelings for her.
My take on this whole aspect is that Khushi has not forgotten ' in fact, her readiness to accept his apology for all the hurt and move on had puzzled me for a bit but wanting to forgive someone and being convinced in your very soul that the man who professes to love you now has changed are two very different things. ASR will eventually need to address some of the invisible wounds on Khushi's psyche he inflicted in his path to coming to terms with his own feelings for her. How can ASR convince Khushi he's not going to revert back to their cycle? Is it a gradual process'will only a lifetime of unconditional love and support provide solace to the deep wounds in her heart left by his past behaviour or will the arrival of Sheetal and Aarav bring it to the fore for Khushi and force ASR to deal with it if he doesn't want to lose her? Looks like the second option will play out.
This subconscious disquiet in Khushi also manifested itself in her reaction to Aarav. The only people in this entire mix who've had really incomprehensible reactions to Aarav's superficial similarities to Arnav and people noting it are Sheetal and Khushi. The audience is waiting for Sheetal's reaction and characterization to play out - currently she just looks uncomfortable and awkward and tries to get away from ASR and his family. But Khushi? I thought Khushi's reaction was very abnormal ' why should she automatically feel a sense of disquiet at the similarites that a boy (who happens to be Arnav's college classmate's mother and that is all she knew during the whole scene where the Raizada family is commenting on the similarities between chhota packet and bada packet) displays with her husband. ASR was no playboy or cad and Khushi knows very well how his past has coloured his views on relationships, fidelity and personal responsibility. I thought Mami, Nani, Anjali and even Payal's reaction to the similarities way more realistic and normal ' how is it that three people who have known Arnav longer do not jump to the same conclusion that Khushi seems to be heading towards? It also seems strange that Khushi doesn't seem to notice what Mami very nicely said ' that Aarav is similar to the current Arnav, not the younger Arnav at Aarav's age ' again, Khushi's own subconscious fears coming to bear here, I think.
It has been interesting to see Arnav and Sheetal's interaction ' he seems very comfortable and even indulges in some small talk. I wonder how much is because of the softening of his facade post Khushi, how much due to some level of comfort in their past relationship/friendship in college and how much because he understands that Sheetal is an introvert and he exerts himself to save their short interactions the usual awkwardness. Nothing in his demeanor with her or when discussing the relationship with Khushi suggests any awkwardness ' whatever it was that that they had, it seemed to not have ended on a bad note for him. It was also not memorable enough for him to remember. I loved the scene where he tells Khushi that Sheetal and him were briefly involved in college ' not apologetic about his past and completely forthright. He does apologize about not telling her earlier but confesses that there was nothing to tell and that he barely remembered the relationship or Sheetal because it did not register much with him. Not only does he think that Khushi has nothing to feel jealous or possessive about, he is able to even tease her when she questions him further about the past women in his life. I para-phrase here - You know how I used to be..in fact, am'did not have many friends and did not easily talk to people' and she was very like me'so we used to talk and became good friends 'we went out for a few dates but there was nothing there..so we broke up. Beautifully written and wonderfully and maturely enacted. A few dates do not a relationship make,. So it looks like they were barely involved. In fact, I would be very surprised if they'd even had a sexual relationship, because it never even occurs to ASR (who we now know is aware that Sheetal is a single mom) that Aarav could be his given the surface similarities he has probably noticed and Khushi has pointed out a couple of times, the child's age and his past (non) relationship with the child's mother.
I must admit that I'm looking forward to seeing this play out - to see how ASR manages to overcome the festering sore in Khushi that his past behaviour has caused, how Khushi reacts once she is convinced that Aarav is Arnav's child (she seems to be heading that way from all the evidence), what Sheetal is here to do (it is too much of a coincidence that a few days after the last obstruction to Arnav and Khushi living happily together is gotten rid of, conveniently along comes a supposed woman from the ASR's past complete with a child that acts like him) and very curious to find out who is pulling the strings of this whole drama ' Sheetal or someone else from ASR's very colourful past that he has declared he wants to move on from. It should also be interesting to see how ASR fights for Khushi. ASR has never had to fight for Khushi's love ' he mostly spent all his energy and time fighting his feelings for Khushi. By the time, he was ready to acknowledge to himself what he felt for her, he already knew of her feelings for him. She came back with great risk to her life to rescue him'twice and almost managed to fall off a cliff in the process the second time around. He has stood up for her to Dadi, society, his family and even hers ' for her rightful place in his house, as his wife, within his family and society and attempted to give her the dream wedding she was denied the first time around and to wipe out the bad memories from the forced marriage he was responsible for but he has never had to fight for her love. She, on the other hand, has been alienated from everyone that she loved due to his actions and managed to fight, survive and come back out stronger with no help from him ' it should be interesting to see how he fares in a somewhat similar situation.
A few other observations :
- How cute were Khushi and Arnav during the whole how many girlfriends have you had in the past scene ' his sudden change from reasoning with her to teasing her, her growing outrage as he drones on with his list of names...his face scrunched up with the effort of remembering all of them, him trying unsuccessfully to hide his amusement at her believing him so easily and then her beating up on him at him daring to not take her question seriously enough and, finally, him stopping her mid tirade and letting her know that nothing meant much to him before he met her ' she taught him what love meant, everything before was just white noise.
- ASR is good with kids ' his interactions with Aarav have been very genuine and realistic and free of any kind of awkwardness I'd thought would characterize him being anywhere near kids. Is it because Aarav is a little like him ' serious and a bit shut down from the outside world? Is it because he is male and a little easier for ASR to relate to ' though you'd think living in a mansion surrounded by a lot of women would make this a non issue? Or is it that falling in love has changed his perspective on children just like it has on marriage?
- Loved the two little girls teasing Aarav ' their giggling and his serious affront at them daring to do so was very endearing.
- Loved the precap, Khushi and her rangeen kal and BankeyLal chakkar and ASR's expression at the new level of craziness about to befall him.
Edited by caltoon - 13 years ago
Naagin 7
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