Past and Future
"Dr Ashutosh, we were so hoping that you would be able to make it...we are also in the process of constructing a medical facility in the block... there are a cluster of ten villages around there with a total population of over 15,000...and there is no well-equipped hospital in the vicinity to service even emergency needs'.!"
"I am really sorry, Mr Awasthi...I have two major surgeries scheduled for the coming week...I just won't be able to make it..but Dr Talwar, one of our senior most doctors will lead the team...he will be able to offer you all the necessary advice...and he will be accompanied of course by a team of four doctors and three interns too...so you do not need to worry at all...am sure the medical camp will be a huge success!"
The Rotarians, who were organizing the camp, could only nod in consent.
Nidhi was surprised. Ashutosh had been so enthusiastic about the medical camp to start with. Suddenly, he was doing a volte-face. She knew that his schedule was clear for the coming week. So, why had he lied to them? Why was he avoiding going on the camp?
The work load at the hospital was heavy following the meeting and so she was unable to pursue the matter. However, she could not stop herself from questioning him in the privacy of their bedroom that night.
"I was not avoiding them...at least not deliberately'...the thing is that I would prefer not to join the team since you are going...you will learn better under the guidance of Dr Talwar...and I do have a load of administrative work to catch up on!"
He did not wait for her to continue with her line of questioning. After wishing her a polite good night, he turned the other way and went to sleep.
Nidhi knew that something was wrong. But she also knew that there was no point in probing. Ashutosh did not respond well to pressure. He would share only when he was good and ready. She had learnt this over the last few months.
Work pressure did not permit much interaction between them over the next few days. They were both so bone tired at the end of each day that they could do no more than drop into a weary sleep.
However, a sudden turn of events upset Ashutosh's plans. A couple of days before they were due to leave for the camp, Dr Talwar's father-in-law had a massive cardiac arrest and was admitted into the ICCU. It was next to impossible for him to leave the city now.
Left with no choice, Ashutosh decided that he would lead the team himself.
Nidhi sensed his disturbed state of mind right through the journey. With all the other doctors around, it was impossible for her to talk to him though.
They reached Mangori village, where arrangements had been made for them to stay. The camp was to be held in Jawalpur, a neighbouring village. The evening passed off in preparing for the next day's camp. Ashutosh left with the Rotary officials to inspect the medical facility that was under construction.
Nidhi was feeling really frustrated. She sensed that he was withdrawing into himself more and more, but none of the others seemed to note the change.
The next morning, they left for Jawalpur in two cars. Ashutosh chose to travel with the Rotarians, leaving Nidhi to join the hospital staff in the medical van. By now, she had a headache coming on, wondering why the hell he was doing whatever he was.
Once they reached the village, everyone got busy setting up for the camp. The villagers had started arriving too and there was no time to even breathe. And yet, Nidhi noticed that Ashutosh was not around. She assumed that he was with the Rotary officials. When it was time for them to break for lunch, she noticed that the Rotarians were supervising the arrangements. She was shocked to see that Ashutosh was not with them.
"Excuse me, Sir...but where is my husband...I mean Dr Ashutosh?"
"Ma'am...he wanted to spend some time walking around the village...he said he knew the area very well...and would prefer to be unescorted...so we left him to it,,,'is he from around here maybe?"
Nidhi could hardly tell them that she had no clue. She thanked them and started looking for him. She enquired with a few villagers and was told that he had been seen in the vicinity of the local temple. She set off in the direction that they indicated.
She soon found the old, derelict temple on the banks of a river. Ashutosh was not in the temple though. When she walked to the riverside, she found him seated there all alone, throwing pebbles into the water.
She walked up to him and seated herself quietly next to him, before placing a hand on his arm.
Ashutosh was startled as he grew aware of her presence.
"What are you doing here...why did you leave the camp?"
"I know you are the dean...but I could ask you the same question!"
He gave a small laugh.
"Well...I came here primarily to inspect the facility...that was done yesterday,,,so I...!"
"So you decided to abandon us'!"
His face lost all colour at that.
Nidhi was shocked to see that.
"I am sorry...I was just'"
He shook his head and sighed heavily before turning away towards the river.
She remained silent in the hope that she had maybe unwittingly breached his wall of silence.
"This was where I was abandoned!"
His words came out in such a rush that she was not sure that she had heard right.
"There used to be a garbage can on the other side of the temple...where pilgrims could bin the leftover food...that was where I used to fight with dogs'.!"
Nidhi 's heart broke even as tears filled her eyes.
"Is this why you did not want to come?"
He nodded slowly even without looking at her.
"I was told my mother died giving birth to me...I was brought up for a while by a man who I thought was my father...later, I discovered that he was not..he had found me as an infant at the temple doorstep...he was the temple guard...he took me home since he felt sorry for me...but I was less than six years old when he too died...this was where I grew up, fighting with dogs for survival...this was where Baba found me!"
Tears were streaming down Nidhi's cheeks by now.
"I am so sorry, Ashutosh...I am so sorry'!"
"Why are you sorry...it is hardly your fault'!"
He turned around to see her and was shocked by her tears.
"Nidhi, please don't cry...this is why I did not want to come...much less come here with you...I did not want to burden you with my memories'!"
"You don't trust me enough for that?"
He was taken aback.
"It is not about trust...I don't want you suffering too...bad enough that I am'!"
"You would rather suffer in silence than share your pain with me...why...am I not worthy of sharing your pain with?"
Ashutosh shook his head hurriedly.
"You know it is not that'!"
"I don't ...I don't know anything...I only know that I love you more than life...and it hurts like crazy to know that you don't want to share your pain with me'!"
Ashutosh drew her into his arms.
"Nidhi,,...it is not like that...please...you are all I have...whom else will I unburden myself with if not you?"
"Stop saying that...this is not a burden...don't you know...joy doubles when shared while grief is halved,,,,please don't shut me out ever again'!"
He kissed her gently on the forehead and wiped her cheeks.
"Come now, let us get back to the camp...people must be wondering If we have taken off for a rendezvous'!"
She blushed sweetly before taking his hand and getting up.
As they walked past the temple, she let go off his hand. She walked up to the entrance, went on her knees and touched her forehead to the doorstep before kissing it reverently.
"Thank you for giving him to me!"
She sent a silent prayer up to some unknown power above before rising up and turning to him.
Tears streamed down his cheeks as he held his arms wide open. She flew into them and they both knew they were where they belonged.
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The camp passed off peacefully thereafter.
There was one old lady who, the chest physician felt, was displaying symptoms of tuberculosis. He was not very positive of the prognosis but felt that she required immediate hospitalization. Ashutosh ordered that she be shifted to KGH by ambulance. The villagers conferred among themselves before coming up to them.
"Sir...there is a problem...the old lady has a granddaughter'...if you take the old lady to the hospital, who will take care of the child?"
"The lady needs immediate medical care...is there no other family member to take care of the child?"
"No Sir...the child's mother, who was the old lady's daughter, died in childbirth...the thing is her husband had forced her to undergo four abortions before this child was born..because he did not want a girl child...the fifth time, she somehow escaped from her husband and his family and came to her mother's house...and then they moved to this village because they had some distant relatives here,,,.now the child has only her grandmother ...there is no one who can or is willing to care for her'!"
Someone had brought the child in the meantime. She was a little girl of about a year at the most. She had a mop of curly hair and huge black eyes. She did not seem afraid of the crowd though. She looked around with inquisitive eyes before setting her sight on Ashutosh.
Ashutosh reached out and patted her cheek and she responded by grabbing his finger and taking it to her mouth. She started sucking on his finger.
"I think the poor kid is hungry!"
Nidhi asked for some milk and biscuits from their supplies.
By then, the child had held her arms out to Ashutosh, who was left with no choice but to hold her. She greedily bit into the biscuit that he held out to her before drinking the milk thirstily.
"Saheb...please can you admit this child in some orphanage in the city if you are taking her grandmother away...what if the father somehow finds their whereabouts and comes looking for the baby here...we cannot keep the child safe...please do something to safeguard the child'.!"
It was unanimously agreed that the child could not be left behind in the village.
The child had fallen asleep on Ashutosh's shoulder. One of the nurses offered to take her but the child started sniffling when AShutosh tried to move her.
"It's okay...let her be,,,she can go with us in our car!"
Ashutosh gave Nidhi a grateful look even as they headed out to their car.
Was this to be a burial of a painful past and the beginning of a beautiful future...and not just for Ashutosh?
Yeh Rishta Kya Kehlata Hai
Hui Ghum Yaadein
Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi 2
Fan Fictions
