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Where the Raizadas went wrong
Now it goes without saying that the Raizadas are a very compassionate bunch of people. They took the orphaned Arnav and Anjali under their wings and treated them as their own. In serials where most Mamaas and Maamis are conniving and resentful of a pair of orphans skiving off their money, Maami willingly sold off her jewellery to fund Arnav's business. They sent him to Harvard and even let Anjali's husband live in their house as a ghar jamaai.
But the Raizadas suffer from what most people call 'overcompensation'. Aamir Khan said in Satyamev Jayate: When people see disabled people, they either treat them like crap or they treat them extra-special and call them 'unique' and 'special children'. In the same way, Arnav and Anjali have forever been rendered helpless in the Raizadas' eyes. Orphaned at such a young age, thrown out of their house-who can't help but feel sorry for them?
What they forget is that the best way to take care of an orphan is to treat him/her as badly as you treat your own children.
In Arnav's case he has had behavioural problems since he was a child, so even when he came to the Raizada mansion, it must have been no big deal for him to throw tantrums and behave like typical angry ASR and Maami and Nani must have excused him by thinking, "He's suffered a trauma, so like any teenage boy he is acting out, let him go.'
It is in Anjali's case that we see the most frightening avatar of the Raizada's mistake. Here Anjali's fault is she is a woman. Not just a woman, she is a woman who has been abandoned on the day of her marriage. She carried this social stigma with her throughout her life. In fact her mothers death must have even attached an 'unlucky' tag to her. Hence the Raizadas, instead of teaching Anjali to stand up for herself, have made her even more dependent. Throughout her life, Anjali has been made to feel that ASR and Shyam are the only solutions to her problems. The Raizadas have failed to give her 'tough love' and enable her to make decisions on her own. Instead, if she so much as cuts a finger, they behave like she is hameorrahging
.I am definitely not judging Anjali...many people find her emotionally manipulative..but she's no Katniss Everdeen...she's the kind of woman who doesn't even KNOW the power she has over people...and therefore its easy to hate her, but as you read in my post, I blame her family. They have always made her feel crippled, and never taught her to stand on her two feet. For as long as I remember, ASR or somebody has been has been there to catch her. Raizadas, sometimes its okay to LET GO...if your child doesn't learn how to FALL, he can never walk properly...but once he falls, and gains the courage to stand up again, thats when they stop being crippled and become a whole person with their own identity...
We have seen this aspect of the Raizadas with Babli. Remember how Babli used to get away with everything simply by making those 'I am orphan, pity me' sad eyes at everyone? She was a younger version of Anjali.
Anjali and ASR have always been made to feel that their behaviour can be excused simply because they have suffered tragedy. Sorry, but having a bad childhood in no way gives you an excuse to behave like a psycho, especially if you are a business tycoon nearing his 30's. Everything can be forgiven for Anjali and ASR because they have a 'bad past'. Sorry, but even rapists, terrorists and other criminals are born in poor conditions. That way everybody is a victim of circumstance. Does that mean that we don't have a conscience? What about those people who rise above their past, who bury their ashes and emerge anew?
This is why Khushi is Arnav's soulmate. She does not treat him 'specially' nor does she hate him. She accepts him for who he is, and though she takes his insults lying down, she never fails to make him feel miserable for it. And this is why Arnav hates Khushi-because he has to redeem himself for him.
The Raizadas never taught ASR and Anjali how to move on. ASR still clings to his past, and Anjali will stare at Shyam's old potraits to the point of wanting to kill her baby.
I am not justifying ASR's behaviour, just explaining it..what he said to Khushi indicates a larger problem at hand..the way society always blames a woman if she lands in a difficult situation and not the man who put her there...it is disgusting that despite having studied in America, he can think like this...he was justified till the point where he asked Khushi why she went to visit Anjali..tactically that was a wrong decision(Because Anjali is so not in the state of mind to handle anyone right now) and I could see the businessman ASR then, but he quickly turned back into his chauvinistic old self, and I was left disappointed again.
Arnav asked Khushi why she came into his life. Simple: She is like a breath of fresh air. With her, ASR gets the chance to create new memories, ones which he can replace his old ones with. So that when he's old and greying, he does not remember his mother being shot, but all his happy moments with Khushi.
DAMMIT PEOPLE REPLY, I'M NOT GOING TO DRIVE YOU AWAY AND SAY 'TUM MERE TOPIC PAR KYUN AAYE?'🤣
Geet - Hui Sabse Parayee
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