new cid story-khoon shaadi ke mantap mein

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dr.fahmi

@dr.fahmi

Inactive

Posted: 15 years ago

#41

good to see a new writer in forum. good one naspo. but as m_kal have said there definitely is a margin for improvement. hope to see more from u😊

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visrom

@visrom

Stunner

+ 4

Posted: 15 years ago

#42

There you are!!! Nsapo!!! You have a midas touch....you have given them a brilliant idea. Maybe they replaced Abhijeet with Daya, but that doesn't make any difference. They have taken the idea.

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Nandini

@NandiniRaizadaa

Trailblazer

+ 4

Posted: 15 years ago

#43

Do you want an honest feedback?

You are a good writer. The story is good. A few points beyond which can give that golden touch to the story

First of all change the title to Khoon shadi ke mandap main

Make Paragraphs while writing

Improve your grammar. If you are comfortable in English write in English

Take care of formating, font size etc

Story is good , but language has to be improved

Edited by nandiniraizada - 15 years ago

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Debasree

@debasree04

Sparkler

+ 3

Posted: 15 years ago

#44

Nice one....I also agree with m_kal2011,visrom & nandini....so I dnt repeat it......keep writing & waiting 4 ur nxt one

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nsapo

@nsapo

Dazzler

+ 2

Posted: 15 years ago

#45

Originally posted by: nandiniraizada
Do you want an honest feedback?

You are a good writer. The story is good. A few points beyond which can give that golden touch to the story

First of all change the title to Khoon shadi ke mandap main

Make Paragraphs while writing

Improve your grammar. If you are comfortable in English write in English

Take care of formating, font size etc

Story is good , but language has to be improved