Originally posted by: dellzcreationz
Aaastha
I can feel your pain ... Because mere saath bhi aisa same cheez hua in my school in Bahrain
Even I was nerdy like you and tbh comparing to other girls I wasn't that pretty, I used to feel complex about my body.... And the way I look...
I used to love this guy who was the don of our school, jaise woh chala tha apne bande ke saath... (Like Kabir Singh) and uska attitude bhi waise hi tha... He flirted with many girls... Lekin kabhi meri aur nahi dekha ..
I tried to hide my feelings by trying to fake my love for another guy in my class... And me and that guy were never class mates (we never got shuffled) since church ke Catechism classes mein mila karte hai...
So I used to let people tease me with the other guy who knows this thinks that I love him but he doesn't... But still loves the attention... And I was just carrying on with because if people find out that I like that Don of our school ... I didn't want to make my heart break because I felt he would said bad things to me that I don't deserve him and he would have commented on my looks and all...
Because already that guy who I did fake love too even though he loved me giving that attention to him even though he didn't reciprocate back... At some point he did say that he wasn't my type and that I will bring his reputation down.... That hurted me that's why all the more I didn't wanted to tell the boy that I love because of this complex issues that we face as kids...
And tbh... I am still not over with that guy even though he was my school crush... Since 6th std... Till now ( I passed out being a graduate in 2019 - 20 years of age)...when I finally told him my feelings on the set of Ishq Subhan Allah filming Zara's death sequence... It made me realize that I should tell him because I die... Because death can come anytime and I don't wanna die with regret... I told him that I have move on..
But I have not... And last year... in Nov, his sister came over to my place and she too wanted me to be his wife... I know that can happen because he is in love with a girl who is just like me... Only difference she stays in his hometown (Mangalore) and am in Mumbai...
Meine kitne sapne dekhe... Imagining us... Making him a better man... So much...
He is my first love, I don't think mein kabhi bhi aisa passionate wala love kisi aur se kar paungi...