Episode Spoiler - 24 June 2021 - Page 11

Originally posted by: aye-masakalii

Yeh sab karne ke liye he has to pause and introspect and think, and he's too preoccupied to do this yet. But I agree, he cannot take on the whole 'not encouraging her' approach. How casually they both drop references to this being life long. Zindagi friendzone mein kaatne ka iraada hai?

I just said this in my post too, that he has to introspect.

But they haven't been married that long and have been on a roller coaster ride so far, so I don't see the need to rush. As long as he isn't closed off to the idea completely but wants to proceed very slowly with caution, take baby steps, it's fine. He just needs to make sure he doesn't give Pallavi the wrong signals because if she feels hurt or humiliated by his lack of not reciprocation but even just acknowledgement of her feelings, I expect her to withdraw and then good luck to Raghav getting her to open up again. If she understands his insecurities and he either asks for time or indicates it, she will understand and will wait for him to become more at ease, maybe even help him open up slowly. That's just the kind of person she is.

Originally posted by: Jiarao

Good episode.

Aai Pallavi scene was good. Sharda understood Pallavi has feelings for Raghav. I found her jealousy natural and adorable.

Ved was comical. Hope he does something better than fancy dress this time.😆

Sunny is not evil is what I can say from whatever they have shown about him.

Coming to hot topic of Raghav- Pallavi scene I didn't see it as a romantic scene. Also the scene didn't felt like forced. It wasn't perfect from the point of execution but served its purpose. Raghav wanted to look into her eyes and make sure he indeed has a place in her mind and she isn't doing it just to make him or Amma happy.

In my opinion Raghav isn't neglecting Pallavi or taking her for granted.

He still feels guilty and unworthy of her. Had he been successful in reuniting with her family he would be much more confident around her.

Her assurances aren't going to lessen his guilt because he doubts it's her sympathy for him after listening to his past. He was sure she will hate him after listening to his story but that didn't happen. Instead she helped him patch up with his mother. As much he appreciates this, knowing her nature he thinks she is staying with him either out of sympathy or her basic nature of making other people happy ignoring her own feelings.

Raghav and Pallavi's marriage currently is an unequal partnership because Pallavi will always have moral high ground which makes Raghav less confident around her.

This marriage can only work if he gains his confidence back and that can happen only when he realizes he has indeed saved her by marrying her. I am hoping upcoming Mandar track will take care of this.

One last thing Raghav was really busy and not neglecting Pallavi on purpose. 😆I am saying this because I have done it countless times , completely ignored my husband when I am busy.

I totally agree re raghav and pallavi’s relationship.. @bold:👍👍

Raghav has been unable to get her family back to her also. He hasnt really done anything concrete for her. But she is keeping on doing things for him. Just the intention matters is not working out for raghav. Which is why he her tickets for kolhapur. His mom said she is not happy here.. so he wanted to give her happiness and be free of the guilt that he has actually done sth for her.

Unless he actually does something major for her, their relationship will always be unbalanced. Which is why i want pallavi to go back to mandaar when he comes. pallavi and mandaar are equals. But raghav all he has done since marriage is earn repentance , say sorry, thank you. This will never work out in the long run. A marriage has to be equal partners. He just has to love her back and everything will be alright will never work out bacuse pallavi will always be superior to him. He does get carried away when she says or does something but its just momentary.

Yes, it doesnt excuse his rude behavior in regatds to his sis matter.. its a different story altogether.

Originally posted by: inlieu

I just said this in my post too, that he has to introspect.

But they haven't been married that long and have been on a roller coaster ride so far, so I don't see the need to rush. As long as he isn't closed off to the idea completely but wants to proceed very slowly with caution, take baby steps, it's fine. He just needs to make sure he doesn't give Pallavi the wrong signals because if she feels hurt or humiliated by his lack of not reciprocation but even just acknowledgement of her feelings, I expect her to withdraw and then good luck to Raghav getting her to open up again. If she understands his insecurities and he either asks for time or indicates it, she will understand and will wait for him to become more at ease, maybe even help him open up slowly. That's just the kind of person she is.

Yup, actually I just added this point to my post- he needs to pause and introspect, but the situations the two have been thrown in one after the other haven't allowed him time too. So much has happened in such little time. I'm completely fine with baby steps too, I signed up for a slow burn here, but if this week has been any indication, Pallavi is hurtling straight to heartbreak, unintentional as it may be, due to his distance and unresponsiveness and aloofness. And I believe Raghav has just about used up his chances with Pallavi now, another let down at his hands will be tough for both her as an individual and then as a couple to recover from.

ETA: She'll give him the time she needs if he asks for it, but I just want to see a little more on his end. We've seen her be supportive, be an anchor, fight for him, her emotions, her monologues. It's starting too feel a little too unbalanced to watch right now, so I'd like to see either her pull back and they both can prioritize other family things for a bit, or he takes a few steps forward.

Originally posted by: aye-masakalii

Yeah, I don't like him questioning her on her feelings and putting her on the spot when he himself doesn't have clarity yet. It's feeling a little unbalanced, and kind of uncomfortable. The scene would have been much more natural had he just told her, hey, listen, please do not do this under any kind of pressure. I'm not forcing any expectations on you, so do what feels right to you, and let it be at that.

I wanted an apology, or at the very least, an acknowledgement of the family dialogue too, but he seems to be getting more and more distant by the episode. Jhaadu se zyaada, I'd prefer for Pallavi to be a little distant herself in response. It's not about punishing Raghav, he is grappling with guilt and insecurity, but rather about looking out for herself. At the end of the day, his insecurities after everything she's already said and done, can't become her burdens to carry. So if he's being like this, she should step back thoda sa herself, bring back some balance.

I strongly feel this is intentional though, because it's such an explicit, sudden change- it must be getting written for a reason. Agar intentional nahi hai, then maybe a sign that the shows writing is starting to go downhill, but I really don't see it like that yet.

I feel as if hearing it from her is what makes him feel secure. He didn't have the courage to ask her if she was happy enough to make this marriage real and continue to live with him, rather he just booked tickets for her. When she told him what she wanted loud and clear, he was reassured. Tick off the level 1. Next level is what they're on right now and again he wants to hear from her what she wants, based on which he'll again get the next level of assurance to advance a little bit himself, and I think this is why we see him getting her a present for her in the precap, something that he chooses for her himself, willingly.

Just like Farhad told Raghav that he had to fix the mess he made in Pallavi's life himself, that no one else could help him there, same is the case with dealing with Pallavi on being the husband that she needs and deserves in all manners. He might get some guidance but he'll have to walk that path alone. At best she can give cues or at least help him understand what she does or doesn't like but for the rest he'll have to journey alone to get to her.

My only concern after seeing him this way is that I don't want him to be paralyzed by a fear of upsetting the apple cart because it will make it difficult to be even normal with her, and the more she falls for him the more his responses would pale in comparison. Not only will she feel hurt or stop expressing herself after a point, they will both end up in some sort of stalemate out of which it would be hard to extract themselves without a force majeure of some sort. Now that the vultures are arriving on the scene, they would be first to prey on it.

Originally posted by: inlieu

Yes, but this is easier said than done. He has felt unworthy of love in general for so many years that he got used to it. Transitioning from 'nafrat meri zindagi ka qissa' to being showered with love, at least from Amma and Pallavi, is a big deal for him. He may have reconciled with Amma but I don't think he's recovered from the trauma of losing family members. On top of all this, the woman whose life he unfairly destroyed, who gave him a chance, and is now being not just fair with him but caring, respectful, loving, etc. is such a good woman compared to his 'badness' that he can't seem to handle this. I think this also shows in the way he generally avoids touching her beyond the bare necessities.

We know he needs to stop being afraid but it won't happen that easily I think. His guilt, pain, shame, insecurity, etc. are all twisted into a knot in his heart, and until that is undone the more he tries to pull at it the tighter it will become. I feel that the more she tries to be good to him, the harder it's going to be for him to handle, and the more he will try to protect her from himself. He won't try to win her love at this point, he doesn't think that's an avenue he has the right to explore and when it comes to Pallavi his logic doesn't always side with him.

Also, now that we see him going into don mode again he will not focus on himself that much, at least not until the Keerti matter is resolved. By then, Mandaar might make an entry and then he'll be caught up in a storm which will force him to introspect. I guess that's the way the future tracks are going.

You maybe right ..his insecurities, guilt, shame etc are all valid reasons for him to try and keep a distance from her atleast till the time he is able to overcome these issues for himself.. but till the time that happens and I don't know how long that's gonna take or exactly how that's gonna happen, the least he can do is not act like ''ghar ki murgi daal barabar'' with her.. because it doesn't come across as something he is consciously doing yet it hurts to see him be this way with her after all that she did for him..

I had always suspected this but today it was confirmed that Raghav is a bit of a workaholic!

Also, wasn't it telling that the guy who was willing to lose out on 13 cr just to get him Amma and sister home, would be paying more attention to the bid than to his wife telling him she had an urgent matter to discuss?

Originally posted by: inlieu

My only concern after seeing him this way is that I don't want him to be paralyzed by a fear of upsetting the apple cart because it will make it difficult to be even normal with her, and the more she falls for him the more his responses would pale in comparison. Not only will she feel hurt or stop expressing herself after a point, they will both end up in some sort of stalemate out of which it would be hard to extract themselves without a force majeure of some sort. Now that the vultures are arriving on the scene, they would be first to prey on it.

This is exactly it. Them reaching this uncomfortable stalemate, where so far they've been good at communicating, right with Ved, Sunny and Mandaar on the horizon...it leaves a deep sense of foreboding. Too much negativity in a show also becomes hard to handle. They should remember to retain some bright spots through whatever tracks come next.

Originally posted by: aye-masakalii

I think it'll be because of Pallavi's happiness and not Mandaar's lack of shareefness, tbh. She's obviously going to be overwhelmed and conflicted. Her dead son has come back! It's the one miracle every parent who's unfortunate enough to go through that prays for.

But her affection for Pallavi is genuine, and once the dust settles, she'll want Pallavi to pursue what makes her happy, and not give it up for the sake of a what-could-have-been. Pallavi and Mandaar, had they gotten the marriage they had planned for, could very well have been a fairytale couple, but maybe they've just missed their moment now.

Actually its really a double edged sword situation when mandaar comes back. Pallavi can cal it her mayka and all that jazz but it only gets uncomplicated till the husband is dead or missing.

Hypothetically, lets say that this is a real life situation.. if pallavi chooses raghav then she cannot be going back to the deshmukhs saying mayka.. mandaar is back.. he was her husband.. she loves him.. doesnt love him is altogether another matter. Its extremely cringy for me to even think.. yes she doesnt have to cut ties but that cannot be called her mayka at all. Lets say raghav and pallavi have some issue. Pallavi will want to share with aayi.. how can it be acceptable her second husband that she is sharing info with the first husbands family?? Raghav and pallavi can never have a successful marriage at all..

Again if pallavi chooses mandaar, she will have to completely cut off ties with raghav and his family.. again she has shared a minor part of marital life with raghav. How can it be acceptable to her first husband. Again raghav will always be the sword hanging in pallavi and mandaar life and they can never have a happy peaceful marriage.

Its all only in tv shows, we will say oh pallavi has good intentions, she is good so she should be allowed to help and be a part of two families. She only loves her husband. The husband or his family is unnecessarily insecure and suspecting.. but this never works in real life.. the husband or his family’s expectations from pallavi will be so right from a real Life persoective. pallavi will have to choose and cut off the other family if she wants peace and happiness..

Originally posted by: aye-masakalii

Yup, actually I just added this point to my post- he needs to pause and introspect, but the situations the two have been thrown in one after the other haven't allowed him time too. So much has happened in such little time. I'm completely fine with baby steps too, I signed up for a slow burn here, but if this week has been any indication, Pallavi is hurtling straight to heartbreak, unintentional as it may be, due to his distance and unresponsiveness and aloofness. And I believe Raghav has just about used up his chances with Pallavi now, another let down at his hands will be tough for both her as an individual and then as a couple to recover from.

ETA: She'll give him the time she needs if he asks for it, but I just want to see a little more on his end. We've seen her be supportive, be an anchor, fight for him, her emotions, her monologues. It's starting too feel a little too unbalanced to watch right now, so I'd like to see either her pull back and they both can prioritize other family things for a bit, or he takes a few steps forward.

I have a feeling we're starting to see the next phase of it for him: protectiveness. He talked about keeping his family safe and made special mention about her there too. The thought of her being in danger because she's now his family is going to make him even more fiercely protective of her, which I think would be great because it will bring out other emotions in him.

Also, in the show it's only been a few days since she walked out of the Ds house with him and he got her tickets to Kolhapur. Let's give it time. I feel when they return to RR mansion we'll see the writing step up too as they probably didn't want to spend too many more scenes in this location anymore.

Originally posted by: Lonelythots

Actually its really a double edged sword situation when mandaar comes back. Pallavi can cal it her mayka and all that jazz but it only gets uncomplicated till the husband is dead or missing.

Hypothetically, lets say that this is a real life situation.. if pallavi chooses raghav then she cannot be going back to the deshmukhs saying mayka.. mandaar is back.. he was her husband.. she loves him.. doesnt love him is altogether another matter. Its extremely cringy for me to even think.. yes she doesnt have to cut ties but that cannot be called her mayka at all. Lets say raghav and pallavi have some issue. Pallavi will want to share with aayi.. how can it be acceptable her second husband that she is sharing info with the first husbands family?? Raghav and pallavi can never have a successful marriage at all..

Again if pallavi chooses mandaar, she will have to completely cut off ties with raghav and his family.. again she has shared a minor part of marital life with raghav. How can it be acceptable to her first husband. Again raghav will always be the sword hanging in pallavi and mandaar life and they can never have a happy peaceful marriage.

Its all only in tv shows, we will say oh pallavi has good intentions, she is good so she should be allowed to help and be a part of two families. She only loves her husband. The husband or his family is unnecessarily insecure and suspecting.. but this never works in real life.. the husband or his family’s expectations from pallavi will be so right from a real Life persoective. pallavi will have to choose and cut off the other family if she wants peace and happiness..

Exactly this was my perception and that's why I was assuming that all mandaar scenes are flashbacks and he is really dead . Well I am hoping it's that way as it will make more sense to the story and bcus if mandaar is alive it does take away the gravity of pallavi being his widow right .I don't know if I am making sense at this point but dealing with the dead mandaar being dead still n then discussing his matter will be better imo