Instigation (PP) Vs Inflammatory reaction (Sai) - Page 3

Originally posted by: Jiss555

sry not racist but definitely casteisit

Junglee mulgee is a racist slur-- because she comes from Gadchiroli and is called junglee after tribes.... the constant reference to her 'jungle roots' so to say.

The khoon part is casteist.

This is my POV. Sai is 18 years old. She behaves like an 18 year old girl who gets married! It's not a love marriage, she's in a stuck situation where she is, at the moment dependent on Virat.

Clearly, a joint family is not a situation she is used to. But she's trying with her limited skills..cooking, helping Ashwini.

As a character, she is different in that she doesn't do anything to maska marofy or gain brownie points. She's doing what she knows.

Also, I read some post about such a young girl knowing to cook. Sadly, she is a motherless child and not from a rich family with cooks. Her father has taught her to cook for her own survival at home because he may not have been always around.

College will help her deal with her 'morbid' family life, I hope. She is not trying to 'be' anything, she is trying to cope with the curveball life has thrown at her. Sadly, it is when she falls in love, that she will soften, to her disadvantage.

Sorry for this uncharacteristically long post. I have a soft spot for Sai. And I can see myself supporting her throughout.

Januuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu🤗 Ki haal hai yaar. Tumhari post ka intezar tha😆

Coming to this post, this is exactly what I needed to see. As usual, tumhara analysis toh perfect hai (anyone who tells you otherwise, can fight me😈).

When Sai opened her mouth to tell Pakhi's truth, I was literally like "Nahiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii! Don't do this Sai. Jaane de usse."

The sentence sounds simple and could even pass off as a rather 'ungrateful, hollow thank you' but it isn't. It comes after a long observation of incidents where one is witnessing a match of words between the instigator-- one who provokes; and the inflammatory reactor-- one who escalates because they cannot stop. Most often, the instigator is seen as a victim because the one escalating, due to his or her inability to let go with grace, ends up appearing like the 'bully'. To the bystanders (who are just watching such a match for fun- Eg Karishma) and the catalyst cheerleaders (who have picked sides and lend support to their team. Eg- the rest of them vs Ashwini), the take down of the "perceived bully" is what defines whether the match ended on the moral high ground or not. But for a perceptive insight (on account of relationship or closeness to the 'bully'), the privilege of declaring the winner is often accompanied by the burden of disappointing the team backing the instigator -- the silent and actual bully.

^I totally agree with this! Pakhi played her cards very carefully. Because, it doesn't matter if Virat is on her side or not (internally, it does), but the rest of the family is. And Virat will automatically come on board with the rest of the family. Though Virat has noticed that the trouble Sai gets into is mostly because she's reacting to what the others have said, he can't bring himself to completely support her, because, people-pleaser.

As for Virat keeping Sai in the dark, I totally agree. Though he does take a stand for her, there are times when you'd rather that he doesn't, because he somehow coaxes her into giving in, though she's not in the wrong (reception day - when Kaku insulted Kamal sir).

Many want to blame Virat for PP's misery but I don't. I blame PP for her misery because it's very easy to pass the buck on to the man and say she's a woman she gave it all. But apart from the foolish vaada, Virat hasn't given her any other commitment that she has imagined in her own fallacy. And as we discussed earlier, she's not even fulfilling her part of the consideration for the promise he made to her anyway. But I blame Virat and hold him 100% responsibile for Sai's predicament and for subjecting an 18 year old to this kind of mental abuse when all she needs is peace to recover from her grief and study to be a doctor for heaven's sake.

^I'm not saying that PP is the victim here. She dug her own grave. And her every action is disgusting. As I've mentioned before, I'm not even holding Virat to the vaada that he gave her. I blame Virat for PP's behaviour because he's indulging it. He's letting her get away with everything she does, only because she's pareshaan. This is why I blame Virat for PP's behaviour. When he can nip Sai's wrong behaviour in the bud, why not PP's??

Virat has completely forgotten about the fact it's not even a month since Sai lost her father, her only family, the one she could call her own. And that's pathetic.

Chavan saheb, I now see why you married her against her wish. It was not a difficult decision afterall. You knew she'd fight her own battle and not attach a suction to your energy and ask you to fight her battle like your 'matured best friend' expects and does. Sai is ultimately doing everything that a 'true love' wali wife should do. What made you think that she should be admitted to this shameful family circus of yours without her consent? Don't give her the gyaan of a joint family. It was not part of your deal but the hidden rider that she learnt about after she'd already signed up. When you are done crying over your ghum hua "true love" and have woken up to reality, please take a large bowl of water, wash Sai's feet with your hands and drink that water. That will still not redeem you. It will only put you on the path to redemption.

^Along with fighting her own battles, Sai is also fighting his battles for him, while his matured best friend is the one who pushes him to the battle field. And that joint family gyaan really pissed me off. When he said "yahan sab ke baare mein sochna padega..." I wanted to hit his head with his own lathi. Sab ke baare mein sochna padega expect for Sai? None of your so-called family members, including your mature best friend, and Sunny, even apologised to Sai after they found that they had accused Sai wrongly, and you had no problem with that.

True love then accepts your thoughtless vaada of brahmachaar after you refuse to marry her because she wants to enjoy the pleasure of watching you burn alone in fire all your life instead of telling you this will not keep you happy... Oh sorry, my bad, true love was jumping in the fire with you, you thought 😄 But true love also dragged along your beloved brother into the fire and in fact he's the only one who has burnt in the fire so far😒 because your true love was soundly sleeping on the cushion of your vaada until you brought along another woman into the fire. Now this woman is also too close to getting burnt but she's trying to water rotting plants in your house with the hope that there will be some greenery in the otherwise grey-and-almost-black Chakram niwas, where she doesn't even intend to stay back to enjoy the Green landscape she's creating with her love and antics. She will just nurture them and leave them behind for you 🥺. And your true love never picked up the water can to water these plants🌱 because she couldn't see the lack of greenery there through her rose-tinted glasses. But your true love has decided to now pour acid on this innocent woman's hands because she cannot see her watering the plants, especially the mystic vata vriksha of Chitrakoot 🌳-- arre Chavan saheb, yahan wahan mat dekhiye... It's you😣 -- your true love Ka tree of love.

^This part hits right in the feels. While Virat and Pakhi are self-pitying themselves over the kismat ka khel, we recognise that the actual victim is Samrat, and now Sai. Bechara Samrat, he didn't even know what he was walking into. And Sai knew what she was walking into, but only half information. Despite her quick temper and hot-headedness, Sai is actually full of love. She has so much love to give the world, in spite of everything she went through. She's the kind of person who would burn to give your warmth. If you give her a little bit of love, she's ready to take on the world for you. You can see it from the way she's fiercely protective of Ashwini and Devyani. And she's already taking on the world for Virat, whereas Pakhi just wants to watch the whole world burn, just because she thinks she's burning.

Especially after all this, I want Sai to safeguard the walls of her fort against Virat. Though it may sound sadistic, I want Virat to actually show some actual repentance for everything he put Sai through. Don't fall in love with Virat yet Sai, he's not worthy of all the love you have to offer, at least, not yet.

And Hats off to you Sai Joshi, continue to keep walking tall, and speak for what you believe in. May you never cease to amaze us!

Originally posted by: scarlett22

This is my POV. Sai is 18 years old. She behaves like an 18 year old girl who gets married! It's not a love marriage, she's in a stuck situation where she is, at the moment dependent on Virat.

Clearly, a joint family is not a situation she is used to. But she's trying with her limited skills..cooking, helping Ashwini.

As a character, she is different in that she doesn't do anything to maska marofy or gain brownie points. She's doing what she knows.

Also, I read some post about such a young girl knowing to cook. Sadly, she is a motherless child and not from a rich family with cooks. Her father has taught her to cook for her own survival at home because he may not have been always around.

College will help her deal with her 'morbid' family life, I hope. She is not trying to 'be' anything, she is trying to cope with the curveball life has thrown at her. Sadly, it is when she falls in love, that she will soften, to her disadvantage.

Sorry for this uncharacteristically long post. I have a soft spot for Sai. And I can see myself supporting her throughout.

Wait, you called your post long? 😬

Originally posted by: jankiraghav

Wait, you called your post long? 😬

By my standards.🤪

Normally, my comments are barely 2 lines😃

This is such a beautiful read, Janki! 🤗

Lol, main lunch ke pehle aagayi but with good results cos this post helped me take out that bhadas I was feeling as well.

Chavans: I actually don’t know if the makers are cleverly trying to show the reality of the purity, casteism and racism that prevails at the surface of such family or it’s just simply what they think will be ekdam mast high voltage dialogue and use of jungle mulgi is funny. If former then kudos, but I hope so that it is apparent at some point Chavans are shown getting that comeuppance.

Sai is a total hero saho-fying all this unrequited love baggage her so called deal wala husband is carrying. For all the gyan and judgement she gets from every passerby (including the Sunny - I’m convinced the Mohit actor is not available and hence uske dialogues they’ve given Sunny. Otherwise dude why are you in this house at 9AM?) apart from the thanks for sehna she hasn’t had anyone come find out how she’s doing. Ashwini, Shivani are supposed to be on her side but I don’t see them reaching out to her and providing solace!

At this rate, Shivaji ki nahi, Birbal ki Khichidi is happening with Sai! She’s been told to maintain such levels of patience ki bechari fully bhooki rahegi!! loved that she was super calm with her voice today...and her answers to Sonali were so spot on!! Very subtly underscored the fact that just because you are sasural doesn’t mean you are amazing! Taaliyaan for that chaata with words!

That DIG thing made me LAUGH! Iss se bakwas insaan nahi ho sakta to lead this initiative. He’s not shown any signs of actually believing in the message!

Pakhi AUNTY please to listen to your mother, seems like the only smart one in the household! The fathers dialogue were clear that at any point in time in her life, Pakhi’s never been reprimanded or shown the mirror. She’s been always told she’s right even when she isn’t and Bhavani and her sena also perpetuated the same message! Ziddddddd ——>>> spot on...her own vishesh tippani ka application manual to be sent to her!!

Finally coming to our lead, the vachle shiva due to jiva!! Sacrifice, beta why you think your love/acquaintance is some kohinoor (your biwi is) that not having that is ultimate sacrifice. For claiming to be someone who understands people, he’s done quite a shallow job in terms of understanding both his eternal love and his rock solid, wise beyond her years, 18 year old wife!! Wake up and smell the chai and it should be him that used that yoga knowledge to clear the spaces in his mind to see things better!!

Saath hi saath apne doosre freeloader best friend ko bhi kahin aur bhagao!

Semi rant also complete :)

Originally posted by: I-Am-SherLOCKED

Mujhe yeh post padhkar atyant sukoon mila, almost like catharsis. Could feel all my bhadas coming out 😂

UPSC topper par toh bohot hi gussa aa raha hai. He shouldn’t have said meri family kaafi traditional hai, kaafi crack hai kehna chahiye tha. Most of the time how amazing Sai is takes away our attention from what exactly she’s being subjected to. Reception wale din bhi when Virat told Sai, Kaku mere liye kya hain blah blah, Sai handled the situation so well but logically dekho, how does she care? Jab tum hi kuch nahin ho uske liye toh tumhare liye Kaku kya hai, isse iska kya lena dena?

“Joint family”- my bloody foot. Aisa bhi kya andha pyaar hai Virat ko towards the circus ringmasters? Kab tak monkey balance karega? Bhai, tum IPS ho, IAS ya IFS nahin toh itna kya diplomatic bante ho? Sahi sahi aur galat galat kyun nahin ho sakta? Why all the time this people pleasing, ghar main sabko khush karne ka attitude? Jab tumne vaada diya hi hai Sai ko aur Kamal Sir ko, ache se nibhao. Sirf kehne ke liye mat nibhao.

Janki ji, hamesha ki tarah, bohot khoobsurat post. Sorry, main bhi alag hi rant fest main chali gayi.

Sharon! 🤗❤️

Arey don't ask.. wo "joint family" wala gyaan sun kar, meri satak gayi thi. Kya attitude hai? I mean, the poor girl is really looking forward to her result and THAT is the deal which he is conveniently forgetting. How did appeasing his shameless joint family become more important than her result.

He's policeman who leaves half his spine in his official vehicle and enters the house. Half he uses and then bends. 🤔

Originally posted by: jankiraghav

Warning: Rant post ahead. Please do not set aside your lunch to read. 🙊

Virat has actually kept Sai in the dark about what lies ahead. He married her with the pre-disclosed T&C of a woman residing in his heart. He did not tell her that she'd have to share the roof with this woman -- she had gathered it from her own instinct but not from his admission of it. Nor did he even tell her that his 'kaafi traditional' family is not just rigid but also nihayti badtameez, racist, casteist, pseudo elitist and full of pretense, which has nothing to do with being kaafi traditional. (Chavan saheb, your definitions of words are way off the mark from common understanding: Promise, love, duty, maturity, friendship and even traditional is on that list). He made that disclosure after their wedding in just one sentence. To see the kind of near mob lynching that Sai is being subjected to (Usha maushi included), I really wish she would have actually complained to the DIG and asked him to send her to a Nari Suraksha Kendra ( but chalo, aaj pata Chala ki ACP Chavan Ka Naya assignment bhi Nari Suraksha hai, so you were destined to meet him again even if you had 😅 he would have found ways to check on you).

So Sai I feel bad for you -- no, not the pity wala bad, the exasperation wala bad. Kya tamasbeen logon ke beech rehna pad raha hai. And you are doing it with so much sincerity, love and endurance. But for whom? Any woman who'd marry a man like Virat would put up with all this either because of love or the marriage -- you have neither of the two reasons to do it. Sai, you are a hero. Because you are doing this to execute your part of the promise of this deal with a man, whose heart is pledged elsewhere -- and it is that part of the promise, which he never even revealed to you!

Forget Virat and Pakhi didi's misery coz they willingly got into that situation. If they had 10% courage of what Sai has, they would have never been in this situation.

Poor Sai, she didn't ask for it, she was forced into this life. Virat just said he has someone in his heart and therefore he can never be a true husband to Sai and that his family is traditional. But Virat was not truthful here. He should have given a complete picture of the behavior she should expect from his home esp after knowing Sai's nature of always standing up to injustice.

Its one thing to not like a bahu coz she is not their choice vs insult her at every chance they get. He knows she will not be able to adjust to his family and still went ahead with marriage.

But after come to Chavan Nivas, Virat by bringing up farz ke liye time and again (also in front of his family, Pakhi) , looks like he wants to show/ remind everyone what a great person he is by sacrificing his life for a vaada given to Kamal Sir, that he is doing so much for Sai.

First of all, Kamal sir didn't ask Virat to marry Sai. He said kyaal rakhna. Did Virat think about what about Sai after the fake marriage. Isn't he kind of ruining Sai's future chance of falling in love/ marrying someone else in future after her graduation.

If he truely wanted to take care of her, he wouldn't have married her and brought her to Chavan Nivas, where he knows what Sai will be subjected to. He should have gotten transferred to another city with a good medical college not only for Sai's sake but also for Samrat-Pakhi.

Originally posted by: bones123

That DIG thing made me LAUGH! Iss se bakwas insaan nahi ho sakta to lead this initiative. He’s not shown any signs of actually believing in the message!

Totally agree, when I heard Women related mission, I was like this dude has no idea of what they are.

Uske ghar ke aade log jail jaate if he really has to implement it.

First of all he was not listening, I was almost sure after coming out of meeting room, he will ask the other people, mission kya tha. (reminded me of not listening to lectures in classroom and then asking others if there is any assignment that i missed)

Hoping its not just a scene to show him distracted, but also to expose him to few real cases that women (like Ashwini and Sai) are facing in their homes from their in-laws and how he can related it to his home and correct it. He should see the kind of Mental torture, EMA complaints that come to his office and realize what happens at his home is not less than any crime.

How is he an IPS officer, kuch dimag nahi lagatha.

Don't they have to analyze a situation and logically deduce hows and whats of the crime?

He just jumps into conclusion. It just feels like usse sahi vs galat ka kuch pata nahi hai.

Also hate them say parivar ki izzat, jab ek doosre ki izzat nahi karte, what point of all these namesake dialogues.