After his breakup with Ankita I totally lost touch with him ( as to what was going on in his personal life ) . I did see Dhoni and appreciated his work a lot .
With time it used to feel that it's Ok if they are apart , they are both happy in their world and haves much respect for each other ....He was into things like Physics , psychology etc....and Ankita is not into this at all so maybe it was good that they went their way ..... at least that is what I used to think ....
But then this .... He was not happy , he was anything but happy ...
Who was Sushant ? The guy that we knew ( almost on daily basis ) for almost 6 years or this guy ..because they were both so different .
He did so much charity , had a beautiful family , was giving hits every year ... why this????
I am sorry but I am very shaken up by this . It just does not leave my mind , think about this every day .
Tanya di please don't be sorry. I really appreciate when everyone says what's on their mind because I (and others) often feel the same way but don't know how to say it.
Your question in bold is one that has been bothering me for so long and, like Nisha said, is probably something I won't ever fully be at peace with. I know people change but I really can't get over the fact that it was like observing two completely different people.
I too had stopped keeping up with both of them because even all these years later it still hurt. But from what I saw in passing I assumed that they were both doing fine and had moved on. In some ways I was actually doing "well" with ignoring Sushant and hoping that my inner resentment towards him would dwindle on its own over the years. And I had also tried pretty hard to reason with myself that if it wasn't meant to be then it just wasn't meant to be and that's how life is. People get dumped/divorced all the time, and maybe it was my fault for looking at them as a couple with rose colored glasses... they were, in the end, merely normal people. But now with this all of my emotions came back in full force and I can't help but think about what could have been.
Catching up with them hasn't quite brought me much peace either... Sushant looked like a completely different person and seemed to have lost the inner light behind his smile. And I really feel like the people he had surrounded himself with these past few years weren't the best for him... not that anyone is required to be the best for anyone else... but compared to the support system he used to have where he was almost always priority #1, it was certainly different. On catching up with Ankita I'm finding that her personality is still just about the same (thank goodness), but she is definitely much more poised in interviews and seems more in tune with herself. But when I went digging beyond the surface it was incredibly sad to see how hurt she was... It seems to have taken a really concentrated, daily effort for her to pull herself back together. I came across this article (link) from two years ago and I feel like on the surface it all seems fine, but knowing as much as we do and reading between the lines... the internal struggle and residual pain seem apparent. The last two paragraphs in particular are filled with what-ifs... Bless the people who were there for her throughout that process, and I hope she can find the help she needs to cope with his passing. If we have so many unresolved feelings and questions then I don't want to imagine what it would be like for her.
Mahadev And Sons
