Pyaar Ke Sadqay #2 Bilal Abbas Khan, Yumna Zaidi, Omair Rana - Page 9

Originally posted by: stardust2011

I cannot agree more. That scene was so cringey! Like office se ayega toh biwi khiddmat karein and when Shanzey asks him if he will give her foot massage he gets shocked. Kyu bhai.. And khiddmat is all you need toh kaamwali rakh lo. 😝

Exactly. Itna bekar non sensical scene. I was like wow sirf in cheezon se he is attracted. I want him to love her despite anything. Like he probably felt for Shanzay once. Him running after her for no reason at all.

Originally posted by: M.A.K123

Ok managed to watch the episode

Mansoora: what a selfish and vain woman ! She said she married Sarwar for her kids and business but infact it was always about her and still is ...her kids are not happy with Sarwar ..Sarwar has been stealing from the office ..Mansoora just does not care ... She wants Sarwar and thats all she cares for without any concern for her children ...she even cheated on her sister in law who was actually was suppose to marry Sarwar ...and Sarwar left Po for his greed yet Mansoora fails to acknowledge that

She was no guilt for slapping her daughter for Sarwar ..didnt even shed a tear her daughter said their relationship has ended

Shanzay ...she thinks Abduallah loves her ..obviously because he has been crazy for her ...and had told her that he married Mahjabeen to support her ..nothing more ...but i think Shanzay will eventually realise he loves Mahjabeen ..because she has been noticing his concern for Mahjabeen but at the moment she thinks its guilt because Abdullah is a nice guy..she will realise its not guilt but love ..its a possibility that she will leave him

i think Abdullah too is in process of realising that he is in love with Mahjabeen ..

Now the whole 'khidmat' issue ..i think alot of people are misinterpreting it and exaggerating the meaning ... Abdullah has been a loner with no one taking care of his need ..not even his mother ..he doesnt need Mahjabeen to take his shoes off etc he never forced her infact he has always stopped her ..he is not a male chauvinist ..he is clearly referring to the care Mahjabeen showed him ..she even showed cared that his fingers would be hurting because of all the typing ...i really feel this 'feminism' is messing up mindset of people ...and should be used where required ..where a woman is being abused ...not where a woman is willingly doing things to please her loved ones ..like i said before you would not question a father saying my daughter is doing my khidmat ..you really have to see where the words are coming from and what intentions the person had and whether their actions reflect the same

Anyways thats my opinion

He never expects her to take off his shoes but that's the only thing he remembers of her. We have seen not on one but on many occasions where she is trying to take off his shoes. If he was so against it then he could have sternly said that I don't want you to do this because wives are not meant for this. Let alone saying this all he thinks of is she doing these meaningless stuff. Does he think of taking off her shoes for her when she gets back from the kitchen after doing some work? He doesn't, right? so there the hypocrisy and male chauvinism goes.

Also, before saying things like feminism has gotten into people's head, one should remember that it is this feminism that has allowed women like you n I to even go to the schools and pursue an education alongside men as equals to quite an extent, because of course theory and and practice have a gap.But if this house bound socialization keeps telling us that you are not equal and your place is doing these menial jobs for your husband, then obviously girls like not only Mahjabeen but almost all of them will believe that they are supposed to do that. This false consciousness that women often operate with has its implications and they are ready to ignore it because society and most importantly their parents told them so.

Also no one is attacking Abdullah. It is the fault of those who made it and executed it in this fashion.

Originally posted by: stardust2011

Sorry i disagree with your two points.

1. If Abdullah was referring to the caring aspect, he should have used a better phrase. Director should have used a better scene or conversation.. May be where abdullah was not feeling well or he was late to get home and Mahajabeen was worried. Then again, to expect Mahajabeen's positives in Shanzey when he is with shanzey and expect Shanzey's positive in mahajabeen when he was with her is selfish. Why compare the women who are as different as apples and oranges. The scene shown in the drama has been shown directly and indirectly in multiple dramas since decades. Where the modern jeans wearing girl is vampish and the one who agrees to whatever her husband says, never argues, wears traditional cloyhes is sati savitri. It is high time this false notion is put away. Propogation of this idea is what was cringey in today's episode.

2. "i really feel this 'feminism' is messing up mindset of people ...and should be used where required ..where a woman is being abused ...not where a woman is willingly doing things to please her loved ones ."

Clearly not. Sometimes people get oppressed and abused without even knowing it themselves. Someone looking at it from outside the relationship sees what the one in doesn't see. Lot of women are taught that once they have kids, ifanaging career and kids get difficult they should quit job. When you hear this throughout your life, when such a moment of decision making comes, they quit the job part-willingly. That's because no one ever showed them another option.. May be she could work part time, may be husband could quit his job, may be they work different shifts to run the house. But because of the decades and decades of conditioning, the option of quitting job comes naturally.

100 years ago, when someone's husband died, the wife lit herself on his pyre in the name of Sati,some of them willingly....50yrs ago, after the husband died, wife was supposed to spend the life without any colors and celebrations in the name of love & devotion for her husband... 10yrs ago, if a girl said No to a guy, it was supposedly considered true love if he wrote love letter in blood. In all these examples, the time and evolutionary level of the society drove what was considered 'normal' and what actions/decisions were made willingly.

Husband should not be expecting the wife to pick up his shoes, massage his feet etc as a daily chore. Especially never ask her to do it (which Abdullah did). If he does expect her to, then he should be more than ready to return the favor to his wife as well.

Father and Husband are not a great comparison. Because father-daughtet relationship is not that of equals. Father is always above the daughter in terms of relation, age, discipline whereas husband and wife are equals. Whatever a husband expects wife to do, he should be ready to do it for her. In any equal relationship, if you reverse the genders and the expectation or the request holds good, then that's equality.

Also, Father asking his daughter to do khiddmat is not okay if he doesn't ask the same from his son.

Agree with all your points.

Originally posted by: stardust2011

Sorry i disagree with your two points.

1.

2. "i really feel this 'feminism' is messing up mindset of people ...and should be used where required ..where a woman is being abused ...not where a woman is willingly doing things to please her loved ones ."

Clearly not. Sometimes people get oppressed and abused without even knowing it themselves. Someone looking at it from outside the relationship sees what the one in doesn't see. Lot of women are taught that once they have kids, ifanaging career and kids get difficult they should quit job. When you hear this throughout your life, when such a moment of decision making comes, they quit the job part-willingly. That's because no one ever showed them another option.. May be she could work part time, may be husband could quit his job, may be they work different shifts to run the house. But because of the decades and decades of conditioning, the option of quitting job comes naturally.

Husband should not be expecting the wife to pick up his shoes, massage his feet etc as a daily chore. Especially never ask her to do it (which Abdullah did). If he does expect her to, then he should be more than ready to return the favor to his wife as well.

I dont disagree wth your thought process as you are talking out of your experience. Therr is more to it imo.

I agree the scene looked cringey the way it was executed and bec of the term.khidmat. but its meaning was not. Khidmat obviously is done by servants but they are paid for it. Between husband wife or mother and her children , father and his family etc , they do everything for each other out of love respect care and concern. Like a mother cooking for her children is not khidmat. But nowadays women say that they are not kaam wali bai to cook n clean etc. Well their choice..perfectly fine..but at the same time we cannot undermine the contribution of a mother in upbringing of her children, those who do it willingly, they do it out of love, not bec it's a societal norm. If anyone does it as a norm and it becomes.a headache they better look for alternatives.

Two, what we see.as.oppression and abuse , that is,.responsibilities of a house wife in particular , may be what she loves to do. That may be how she wants to live her life n we cant judge them. Like.mahjabeen was willing to do everything for abdullah selflessly out of love. Will shanzey do the same for him, with the same feeling , is what he is thinking .

As.for workin women quitting their job..I feel having kids is not a compulsion , if none of the parents are ready to give up their jobs and devote the needed time for their children , they must delay having kids till the time one of them is ready. Giving birth to children and handing them over to grandparents or the maid , well it's the most unfair treatment to the new life . If there arent any emotions attached to the child, why bring him.in this world ? I am highly disgusted when I hear things.like "in laws were insisting so we had a child " . Hello People? ! This I am saying in general sense , plz dont take otherwise.

Yes , I agree the father can also quit his job and sit at home and they can also do chores and raise a child. These kind of expectations must be cleared before.marriage to avoid any conflict later.

Expecting equality in responsibilities is just fine. Expecting equality in khidmat is also abs fine. But expecting equality in " everything" is not possible bec men and women are different . They need not be equals ..whether the husband earns or wife one of them has to earn . Likewise one of them HAs to raise children ,one of them has to do chores. It can be mutually settled. In love there are no scores to be settled. I am earning more than you ,I am doing more chores than you, I sacrificed more etc.

My opinion on pks. Shanzey is not wrong in her place. But subconsciously she wants a husband who she can subdue. Abdullah has been subdued since childhood , he is scared of a life partner who will dominate him like sarwar.. his equal is mahjabeen and he is realizing it slowly.

Hello every one

I love Omair Rana so much and his huge fan

Despite his character in pyaar ke sadqay I am watching serial for him

He is my most favorite

Well Abdullah is not a misogynist just one word "khidmat" can't describe his character we have been watching from past 25 episodes ....he never let mahjabeen do his courses and enjoy her putting off his shoes and all....it just mahjabeen used to give her so much care and Abdullah had never got such care from anyone in his life not even from his mother .... Abdullah is the one who didn't let mahjabeen to walk when she hurt her feet ..so just becoz he used the word khidmat doesn't mean he loves mahjabeen becoz she used to press his feet ...they also showed how Abdullah feel confident whenever mahjabeen appreciate him so Abdullah loves mahjabeen companionship !!

Originally posted by: stardust2011

Sorry i disagree with your two points.

1. If Abdullah was referring to the caring aspect, he should have used a better phrase. Director should have used a better scene or conversation.. May be where abdullah was not feeling well or he was late to get home and Mahajabeen was worried. Then again, to expect Mahajabeen's positives in Shanzey when he is with shanzey and expect Shanzey's positive in mahajabeen when he was with her is selfish. Why compare the women who are as different as apples and oranges. The scene shown in the drama has been shown directly and indirectly in multiple dramas since decades. Where the modern jeans wearing girl is vampish and the one who agrees to whatever her husband says, never argues, wears traditional cloyhes is sati savitri. It is high time this false notion is put away. Propogation of this idea is what was cringey in today's episode.

2. "i really feel this 'feminism' is messing up mindset of people ...and should be used where required ..where a woman is being abused ...not where a woman is willingly doing things to please her loved ones ."

Clearly not. Sometimes people get oppressed and abused without even knowing it themselves. Someone looking at it from outside the relationship sees what the one in doesn't see. Lot of women are taught that once they have kids, ifanaging career and kids get difficult they should quit job. When you hear this throughout your life, when such a moment of decision making comes, they quit the job part-willingly. That's because no one ever showed them another option.. May be she could work part time, may be husband could quit his job, may be they work different shifts to run the house. But because of the decades and decades of conditioning, the option of quitting job comes naturally.

100 years ago, when someone's husband died, the wife lit herself on his pyre in the name of Sati,some of them willingly....50yrs ago, after the husband died, wife was supposed to spend the life without any colors and celebrations in the name of love & devotion for her husband... 10yrs ago, if a girl said No to a guy, it was supposedly considered true love if he wrote love letter in blood. In all these examples, the time and evolutionary level of the society drove what was considered 'normal' and what actions/decisions were made willingly.

Husband should not be expecting the wife to pick up his shoes, massage his feet etc as a daily chore. Especially never ask her to do it (which Abdullah did). If he does expect her to, then he should be more than ready to return the favor to his wife as well.

Father and Husband are not a great comparison. Because father-daughtet relationship is not that of equals. Father is always above the daughter in terms of relation, age, discipline whereas husband and wife are equals. Whatever a husband expects wife to do, he should be ready to do it for her. In any equal relationship, if you reverse the genders and the expectation or the request holds good, then that's equality.

Also, Father asking his daughter to do khiddmat is not okay if he doesn't ask the same from his son.

Hey ...i agree with all your points but i was thinking from a different point of view when i wrote the above

1. Abdullah is a simple guy who has faced alot of bullying which has ruined his confidence ... The Women around him have not shown him the same care and softness Mahjabeen has shown him ..Mansoora is selfish and Washma too is not very soft with him ...then came Mahjabeen who showed him care more importantly she encouraged him ... She made Abdullah feel better about himself ..he expects the same from Shanzay ..so thats how i saw it ... But i agree i didnt think of it as a comparison of two women ...so the fault relies with the makers ..

2. Again i agree ..very valid points ..this is why i said 'use feminism where needed'.. people kept seeing comments on how can Abduallah use khidmat or expect Khidmat etc which i think is not a big issue if you see where its coming from (again its all subjective) but more important are issues you have mentioned and they will lessen with the right education and right mindset but honestly they will not go away completely because unfortunately there are many women who also encourage this type of behaviour

I am not sure if you are Pakistani and know about the woman march that was going on few months back with tag 'mera jism meri marzi' i personally feel that sort march are not going to help any woman ..neither will such tag lines (and it didnt...things are still the same) ...its all about going out there and educating women about there rights and trying to change the overall mindset of people which is a very difficult task ..and yes these dramas can help in the cause if executed correctly

3.i felt the word 'khidmat' was highlighted negatively ...so i was simply saying it can't always be interpreted negatively and can be seem in a good light ..(parents and kids)

Originally posted by: Bhatakti_atma

He never expects her to take off his shoes but that's the only thing he remembers of her. We have seen not on one but on many occasions where she is trying to take off his shoes. If he was so against it then he could have sternly said that I don't want you to do this because wives are not meant for this. Let alone saying this all he thinks of is she doing these meaningless stuff. Does he think of taking off her shoes for her when she gets back from the kitchen after doing some work? He doesn't, right? so there the hypocrisy and male chauvinism goes.

Also, before saying things like feminism has gotten into people's head, one should remember that it is this feminism that has allowed women like you n I to even go to the schools and pursue an education alongside men as equals to quite an extent, because of course theory and and practice have a gap.But if this house bound socialization keeps telling us that you are not equal and your place is doing these menial jobs for your husband, then obviously girls like not only Mahjabeen but almost all of them will believe that they are supposed to do that. This false consciousness that women often operate with has its implications and they are ready to ignore it because society and most importantly their parents told them so.

Also no one is attacking Abdullah. It is the fault of those who made it and executed it in this fashion.

Abduallah remembers Mahjabeen for the care she showed him ...be it through taking his shoes off or calling him a genius she is kind to him and takes care of his needs

Abduallah lacked this type of care and love all his life ..he got it from Mahjabeen thats why he is falling in love with her ...its only natural ..you will not fall in love with a person who disregards your needs or puts you down...

And when i talk about feminism ..i am referring to people who pick on small issue and forget the actual cause ..like i mentioned above about the Woman March in Pakistan ..i am not referring to all types of feminism ...(this is my fault as i should have made it clear above)

People will change with the right education and with the right kind of awareness ..

I have read plenty of post on Abduallah being called out for using the term khidmat since this episode...whereas no one complained in earlier episodes when Mah was actually shown taking his shoes off etc

Originally posted by: Bhatakti_atma

Exactly. Itna bekar non sensical scene. I was like wow sirf in cheezon se he is attracted. I want him to love her despite anything. Like he probably felt for Shanzay once. Him running after her for no reason at all.

Shanzay said she was the only girl that would talk yo him in collage ..she said it in one of the earlier epsiodes

So see Abdullah who lacks loves and care probably fell for Shanzay because she was the only one in collage who would talk to him

Originally posted by: M.A.K123

Shanzay said she was the only girl that would talk yo him in collage ..she said it in one of the earlier epsiodes

So see Abdullah who lacks loves and care probably fell for Shanzay because she was the only one in collage who would talk to him

Ya could be. I feel he was just infatuated to her.