Abir and Meenu's conversation - Page 3

Originally posted by: LetThereBeLight

Bang on this is where abir fails most of the time... be it mishkun gd were it was right for mishti but then he didnt think how kunal felt in that... same for kunal accepting mish as abirs love, bringing back baba suddenly,...

between the right n feelings of others bcoz of this right he neglects mostly the second one...

Originally posted by: LetThereBeLight

Bang on this is where abir fails most of the time... be it mishkun gd were it was right for mishti but then he didnt think how kunal felt in that... same for kunal accepting mish as abirs love, bringing back baba suddenly,...

between the right n feelings of others bcoz of this right he neglects mostly the second one...

Mishnal GD wouldn't even have happened if Abir hadn't interefered. Mishti's connection was solely to the the Kunal she saw in the poem she got, the flowers and the kichdi...

She was confused in the whole courtship period about Kunal.

Likewise, he went ahead with wooing Mishti without even considering how Kunal would feel. If he had actually disclosed everything from the start, Kunal would have been secure in his relationship with his bhai.

Even with the whole disclosing the Parul truth he thought abt Parul maasi's respect but he didn't think how rest of the equations would be affected.

Lol.....like the whole thing I said in ur band aid theory post he doesn't believe in giving any justifications or explainations. Is theory ke chalthe he made everything complicated.

Originally posted by: Appu1981

During mishnal gd, Abir wooed mishti by using khidchi, poems, etc which were all abir not kunal. He did all the work in the background and gave credit to kunal. Basically he didn’t allow mishti to know the real kunal. Maybe, if he would’nt have meddled mishti n kunal ki baat gordhana tak pahuchti hi nahi. He thought the pull he had towards mishti can be overcome. He thought he can let her go. He thought mishti would be good for kunal. But had he not meddled mishti n kunal would have realized long back that they are not compatible.

Even after the ngo fire incident when kunal tells mishti that let’s get engaged, mishti is not convinced but abir ( after the dream proposal) says yes to gordhana on behalf of mishti saying that naa bolneki koi wajah hi nahi hai...and bcoz he says so mish says yes to kunal

During nish- mish, abir keeps interrupting all the wedding functions from Roka,Sangeet, mehendi but doesn’t say the truth. Finally the truth is what brings mishti to him. Had he said the truth on roka baat mandap tak pahuchti hi nahi

he waits till the last moment to take action. This is what I meant. So everybody in the show saying mishti ki wajah se should ideally be saying Abir ki wajah se

that wooing was something kunal demanded.. there was a scene were even mish demands help from abir... abir self talks that people do courtship with one another but here i'm doing with myself.... n mish didnt break up with kunal for this reason, i agree him agreeing on behalf of mish was wrong but her reason were the lack of trust, which didnt have any connection with abir helping... kunal would've still went ahead even if abir didnt interfere... mish would've tried to adjust only namans truth n kunals reaction to that made mish break up else she would've broke up after kunal gave her the eye surgery surprise...

the truth during nish mish didnt change things infact only mishti's ehsaan made bm realize the mistake.. even after him saying truth they went ahead bcoz of nannu...

ok sab abir ki galti i agree to some extend but did others leave him alone was he responsible

mishti trusted meenu more in mishkun courtship n she manipulated kunal against mishti

just to separate mishbir in name of protecting abir did the shaadi plan, had mishti trusted abir enough to say about meenu blackmail he would've confronted them before itself... had kunal revealed it was a plan n doesnt love kuhu truely abir would've stopped the shaadi

had meenu said baba truth before itself abir wouldnt have bought baba back

had mishti said everything to abir instead of meenu she wouldnt have got a chance to blackmail abir even then he would've got time to think n do something...

had parul not been selfish he wouldnt have to loose mish

had mish nish hadnt planned nish mish attack the shaadi talk wouldnt have started...

had everyone been truthful to him like they all expect it from abir too all the mess would've been avoided... atleast abir realizes at one point what his mistake is but do others do the same..

lol abir doesnt wait for last moment in being confused but once he know truth he gets into action cant say same about others..

Originally posted by: Appu1981

Before putting my views I want to put a disclaimer that Abir is my all time favorite. I love him.

I feel Abir and Meenu are each other’s alter egos. Abir thinks he is not like his mom but he is so wrong. He thinks meenu is controlling but so is he. And he is not aware how manipulative he is. He tries not to be like meenu and in this tryst he creates more problems for his loved ones

For example, let’s take mishnal GD

He was aware from the beginning that he likes mishti, but he chose to be passive about this. Infact he manipulates kunal in numerous instances. His intentions are always good but so are meenu’s...Then during the courtship he couldn’t stay away from mishti and did all those grand gestures. In his confusion he let things too far. Finally he realized his mistake and was going to take action but meenu happened. And this blame game on mishti started. If he was more open about his thoughts and was upfront things would have been different.

Kuku wedding

again he kind of rushed things by manaoing maheshwari family for the alliance. He should have been a wingman to kunal and let kunal do the hard work. But he was in so much rush to make kuku happen. Had he taken a step back he may have realized meenu and kunal’s plans.

Nish-mish

he took so long to say the truth. He just didn’t realize how he is affecting all other relationships in the maheshwari family. This was the time he n kunal should have disclosed kunal’s birth truth to maheshwari family instead of talking Gol gol

Parul

Parul deserves the respect but abir put lot of pressure on kunal for this. And the way it came in front of the media was not necessary. This could have been done within family first. Parul never wanted this. And blindsiding the maheshwarifamily like this was very insensitive. In this he has again put mishti in a vulnerable position in the RV and Mah family.

I think with the culmination of this track abir will also realize that he is not much different than meenu. They both are manipulative and controlling. The degree and the moral compass differs ofcource.

I also feel in this mother son tashan, mishti, kunal, kuhu and Parul are collateral damages.

It is totally ok to express your views. I find it interesting that you think he is manipulative, so here's my pov.😃

I don't dispute what you said about the past episodes we were shown but I do disagree with Abir being called manipulative.

He is the opposite of Meenu. Think of it this way, they stand opposite each other with a huge chasm between them. They both bridge that chasm using their own means and according to their characteristics....so meenu plans and plots. Abir in the beginning was mostly reactive/passive at times but never manipulative because he always had the best intention. Yes, when he realised he loved Mishti he did steer KuKu more, but he adamantly believed it was in their interest never solely for his - again another difference between him and Meenu.

Meenu, as shown is manipulative, always concerned about the bottom line which is no one should questions her authority or what she thinks is right. She is older and so knows how certain situation/circumstance would pan out...think back to the first moment MishNal proposal happened. Meenu knew Kuhu was expecting the proposal to be for her. What we had been shown repeatedly is that Meenu is an expert at reading people/situation and using it to her advantage.

Abir is totally the other way. His actions stems from the what is right in that moment (whether it is right in future is something he does not often think about but is doing it now, which is a mark of character growth). Again this is so true given his age..he is what in his 20's?, lacks the maturity to visualise what would happen until it happens right in front of him and how many people in their 20's would speak up? the rare few and even then it would be more driven by emotion than with facts and logic. With age comes maturity and experinece to deal with things better. We were shown he was a dreamer, more in his head then in his reality until his world collided with Mishti. That woke him up, but he still hesitated especially as he was clueless about her emotions and what to do. He is more surer now.

Meenu is the obvious head of the family.

Abir is the de facto head, as I mentioned in one of my thread. I also believe as more and more of Meenu will be exposed, Abir will slowly take her position whether intentionally or not and will chain start another round of problems. He can be controlling, if he wants, but most head of the family do that in the best interest. As more and more people turn to him for advice, to see what is right he will have to take decisions. He will only become manipultive/controlling if he does not give a damn about them. That I cannot see happning.

I also said this show is about mirrors, in my thread, and so once again Abir and Meenu are actually mirrors of one another but their intention and morality is miles apart. And that makes all the difference. Which is I said in my opening lines I disagree with the description of Abir.

Originally posted by: LetThereBeLight

that wooing was something kunal demanded.. there was a scene were even mish demands help from abir... abir self talks that people do courtship with one another but here i'm doing with myself.... n mish didnt break up with kunal for this reason, i agree him agreeing on behalf of mish was wrong but her reason were the lack of trust, which didnt have any connection with abir helping... kunal would've still went ahead even if abir didnt interfere... mish would've tried to adjust only namans truth n kunals reaction to that made mish break up else she would've broke up after kunal gave her the eye surgery surprise...

the truth during nish mish didnt change things infact only mishti's ehsaan made bm realize the mistake.. even after him saying truth they went ahead bcoz of nannu...

ok sab abir ki galti i agree to some extend but did others leave him alone was he responsible

mishti trusted meenu more in mishkun courtship n she manipulated kunal against mishti

just to separate mishbir in name of protecting abir did the shaadi plan, had mishti trusted abir enough to say about meenu blackmail he would've confronted them before itself... had kunal revealed it was a plan n doesnt love kuhu truely abir would've stopped the shaadi

had meenu said baba truth before itself abir wouldnt have bought baba back

had mishti said everything to abir instead of meenu she wouldnt have got a chance to blackmail abir even then he would've got time to think n do something...

had parul not been selfish he wouldnt have to loose mish

had mish nish hadnt planned nish mish attack the shaadi talk wouldnt have started...

had everyone been truthful to him like they all expect it from abir too all the mess would've been avoided... atleast abir realizes at one point what his mistake is but do others do the same..

lol abir doesnt wait for last moment in being confused but once he know truth he gets into action cant say same about others..

I also get your point. That’s the beauty of our show that each and everyone is flawed. How their action or reaction or inaction or late action😂 affects others who they hold so dear. I just feel abir is not one dimensional i.e. he is not 100% positive .. he has his shades of grey which even he is not aware

Originally posted by: Appu1981

During mishnal gd, Abir wooed mishti by using khidchi, poems, etc which were all abir not kunal. He did all the work in the background and gave credit to kunal. Basically he didn’t allow mishti to know the real kunal. Maybe, if he would’nt have meddled mishti n kunal ki baat gordhana tak pahuchti hi nahi. He thought the pull he had towards mishti can be overcome. He thought he can let her go. He thought mishti would be good for kunal. But had he not meddled mishti n kunal would have realized long back that they are not compatible.

Even after the ngo fire incident when kunal tells mishti that let’s get engaged, mishti is not convinced but abir ( after the dream proposal) says yes to gordhana on behalf of mishti saying that naa bolneki koi wajah hi nahi hai...and bcoz he says so mish says yes to kunal

During nish- mish, abir keeps interrupting all the wedding functions from Roka,Sangeet, mehendi but doesn’t say the truth. Finally the truth is what brings mishti to him. Had he said the truth on roka baat mandap tak pahuchti hi nahi

he waits till the last moment to take action. This is what I meant. So everybody in the show saying mishti ki wajah se should ideally be saying Abir ki wajah se

i will one thing kunal is manipulated by BB and abir he will take decisions on his own too by announcing mishnal GD after seeing sitaution at MAH house not even talking with abir or meenu... he did same in divorce papers, pre nup also...a nd today accepting parul also... may be abir influenced but decsiosns are taken by situations he see and experience it...

Originally posted by: Appu1981

I also get your point. That’s the beauty of our show that each and everyone is flawed. How their action or reaction or inaction or late action😂 affects others who they hold so dear. I just feel abir is not one dimensional i.e. he is not 100% positive .. he has his shades of grey which even he is not aware

ohhkk sorry dear if my post came across as rude but just he is not the only one who is responsible... he too has different shades... but the think is he is also played by everyone in name of protecting him behind his back which has giving him so much pain... they assume n stand to their point but abir assume but understands too when he is proven wrong... i love abir meenu dynamics n want to see more of it... the main difference they have is he has a positive approach to life but she has negative... just to face his mom he shows his grey side which he is yet to realize himself...

Originally posted by: Mimzy

Mishnal GD wouldn't even have happened if Abir hadn't interefered. Mishti's connection was solely to the the Kunal she saw in the poem she got, the flowers and the kichdi...

She was confused in the whole courtship period about Kunal.

Likewise, he went ahead with wooing Mishti without even considering how Kunal would feel. If he had actually disclosed everything from the start, Kunal would have been secure in his relationship with his bhai.

Even with the whole disclosing the Parul truth he thought abt Parul maasi's respect but he didn't think how rest of the equations would be affected.

Lol.....like the whole thing I said in ur band aid theory post he doesn't believe in giving any justifications or explainations. Is theory ke chalthe he made everything complicated.

haan mini i agree abir is also responsible but wasnt mishti ready to adjust with everything until she saw kunals reaction to naman truth.. the ek dusre ki point prove karne keliye nahi... n mostly they both let meenu be the mediator that gave her opportunity to mess up with them...

this i agree he would've explained to kunal but when he wanted to like in mumbai track things had gone out of hand... the things he had kept in back seat to look slowly had been problem to him mostly... parul truth also i agree...

haan that one he doesnt give justification that i'm replying you there... have some thoughts on it..

Originally posted by: Appu1981

During mishnal gd, Abir wooed mishti by using khidchi, poems, etc which were all abir not kunal. He did all the work in the background and gave credit to kunal. Basically he didn’t allow mishti to know the real kunal. Maybe, if he would’nt have meddled mishti n kunal ki baat gordhana tak pahuchti hi nahi. He thought the pull he had towards mishti can be overcome. He thought he can let her go. He thought mishti would be good for kunal. But had he not meddled mishti n kunal would have realized long back that they are not compatible.

Even after the ngo fire incident when kunal tells mishti that let’s get engaged, mishti is not convinced but abir ( after the dream proposal) says yes to gordhana on behalf of mishti saying that naa bolneki koi wajah hi nahi hai...and bcoz he says so mish says yes to kunal

During nish- mish, abir keeps interrupting all the wedding functions from Roka,Sangeet, mehendi but doesn’t say the truth. Finally the truth is what brings mishti to him. Had he said the truth on roka baat mandap tak pahuchti hi nahi

he waits till the last moment to take action. This is what I meant. So everybody in the show saying mishti ki wajah se should ideally be saying Abir ki wajah se

Originally posted by: LetThereBeLight

haan mini i agree abir is also responsible but wasnt mishti ready to adjust with everything until she saw kunals reaction to naman truth.. the ek dusre ki point prove karne keliye nahi... n mostly they both let meenu be the mediator that gave her opportunity to mess up with them...

this i agree he would've explained to kunal but when he wanted to like in mumbai track things had gone out of hand... the things he had kept in back seat to look slowly had been problem to him mostly... parul truth also i agree...

haan that one he doesnt give justification that i'm replying you there... have some thoughts on it..

She saw Kunal for what he is on their GD, which she should have had a fair idea on the surgery matter itself. The Kunal who made the effort kept on confusing her. Even, with the whole naman thing she was not sure on how to proceed. But when Kunal revealed that Abir was the actual one who made those gestures, it finally sealed the deal for her.

Its not that his intentions are bad, but he has the ability to tweak situations or people so that they do what he wants them to do.

Mishti is as meddlesome as Abir, but she doesn't have that ability to turn situations in her favour. She will be seen explaining herself till the end of the show....par koi usse nahi samjhegi. She doesn't know how to play behind the background, probably that will be her downfall.😳

She will always be in the forefront and Abir in the background.