arshi ss Reformed

hi everyone m back at writing after long

firstly I know this is very lame title but sorry couldn't think of something better at point

secondly if someone remember I have unfinished story here but I will complete it on my blog and give u the links in some time

thirdly it is a OS right now but I would like to know if u ppl would like to read more on the lines and concept if I get positive response then I will turn it into a SS of whose this would be the first part

Now the OS

This goes with time of after shyam truth revealed and khushi was asked to be away from anjali

And the change is khushi was pregnant and she was forced by everyone and including Arnav to give their first child to Anjali to make her happy and now and insecure Anjali keep khushi away from her own child too even the Gupta's as usual thought of Payal and her married life and forced khushi to do as asked and Arnav as usual desperate border line obsessive to do anything to make his sister happy even threatened khushi that if she want to keep their relation she should give the baby to his di

This is a month and half after the birth of khushi's daughter Aditi

It was time of coffee after dinner where everyone gathered to talk and khushi was serving tea and coffee to everyone after she did she was going back to the room when nani asked her to where she was going

Nani- bitiya where are you going come sit with us it is so long that we have had time to chat with you

k-looking right in her eyes- I am not interested in talking naniji and went away

nani and everyone else sighed with guilt

arnav thought about the last month or so that he have been trying to get close to khushi, to get her forgiveness after he have been relieved after seeing his di happy at having Aditi in her arms after getting back her lost princess in her arms

He had understood now that he have been very late at asking her forgiveness all throughout khushi's pregnancy period he had been at his di's side calming down her insecurity at losing him and loosing at the chance of her little princess back in her life well the way he threatened khushi of leaving her if she did not give di the child she was carrying , to be honest he was not very emotional at initially finding out about khushi being pregnant at knowing that she was carrying their first born but later when got to understand it was too late he had promised di and also for her surety signed a legal paper and also made khushi sign it that gave all right of a parent on their first born to his di

Now that he remember it was after that paper fiasco that khushi's attempt at making him change his decision stopped and she completely turned into a silent and submissive lady who listened all instruction at taking care of the baby letting di feel the baby

At that time it gave him relief that khushi has now understood his point of view and agree to it and any slight disturbing thoughts about her being so quiet and submissive he discarded but now did he understand his mistake of discarding those thoughts and not approaching khushi in her pregnancy period ,well in his defence he was a little apprehensive what if she again deny at giving her child to di , he thought that once di have the baby he will approach khushi he will apologise at his empty threat to make her agree at giving the baby

According to him he had everything planned out about how he will give time to khushi spend a lot of time with her taking care of her after her giving birth ,apologise to her make her understand his point of view , bring for her things she liked to eat channas and jalebis and would take her to eat her roadside golgappe etc bring bangles for her the usual things he did to appease her and get her forgiveness and make her happy and then spend a few romantic moments he planned and he thought than everything would be back to normal as it has happened every time

But what he did not knew was the matter for khushi was not so small and her patience at always being blamed and accused and forced at being the scapegoat for other's happiness and always being the for granted person for everyone around her be it Arnav or her own so called gupta family has finally taken it's toll on her things which still arnav did not understand

Khushi has totally changed her attitude even the silent avatar that she resorted to during pregnancy period changed right from the time aditi was handed over to anjali and anjali being the self centered hopeless stupid a*s that she was being these few months even after getting the baby asked khushi to not come close to the baby as she should get attached to the mother who was going to bring her up and not the one who gave birth to her

Gave a fitting sarcastic remark and asked everyone to leave

Flashback

An-khushi ji please don't get me wrong but I would like u to stay away from my aditi , u have given her birth she is attached to u but she should get attached to me she should see me as her mother and not u so plz stay away from her

Everyone was shocked at this demand of anjali but as usual the guptas and payal akash were quite and before nani or arnav could say something they heard khushi speaking and for the first time they did not have the courage to look at her

Kh-ohh I would do as u wish anjaliji better for me to agree on my own than being forced again after all u and ur happiness is important mine never was and will never be and a request plz do put more efforts on making baby attached to u or what do we know next thing is ur dear chotte would drag a little infant to court that she is not making the ASR's di happy which she should no matter what she feels

Flashback ends

It was from that day that khushi never refrained from speaking her mind with anyone and she turned very silent she only speak when directly talked to and keep herself separated from everyone the Raizada family including Arnav and also the gupta family she even stopped considering them as her family she stopped calling payal her jiji instead she call her as payalji and the gupta's as payal's family when asked on this matter by payal once she said that payal proved she is not her elder sister and the gupta's too proved that she is not their own coz if payal was pregnant she would have been asked to give her baby gupta's would have never agreed regardless of its affect on her life because she is their own but she was adopted so they did not cared

Kh-I have stopped living in imaginary world payalji I know that I am an orphan will remain so for all my life

And she went from there

After a few inutes of sitting and having coffee arnav moved to his room only see that khushi was again sitting on pool side atarring at the stars now a days she spend her time looking at stars and maybe talking to her parents about her pain

So arnav too as his now a days routine laid on his bed and kept starring at khushi until sleep over took them

Next morning

This was a different morning from the month and half's daily routine but it took arnav time to realise

When he woke up khushi was as usual not there but he thought that their life could not go on like this today any how he will get khushi ready to come their farmhouse with him and there he will talk to her he will apologise he take the punishment she would give but would make some progress yes he did understand this much that everything would come on track in a day

He went to get ready for the day after coming to breakfast table whrn he did not find khushi he asked and got to know that she hasn't come down yet and that got him a little tensed but he thought maybe she went to temple to spend lone time but he wanted to confirm coz she was not in her right mind these days he did not want her to be unprotected anywhere so he called his driver Mohan with whom khushi would have gone but the driver's answer made him panic as he said he have not taken khushi anywhere he was outside the house

When arnav told everyone that khushi is not in room and not gone out with mohan everyone started searching for her arnav again went to his room to see if could get something which will tell him where khushi is

He got a letter at his bedside which he missed during morning he first looked at the end it was from khushi till that time everyone looked for her off course except anaji who always away from all this spend her time in her world of happiness

When they reached the room they saw the letter and all started reading that letter

The letter

First of all arnavji I would like to tell u that I am going from your life forever and this is no impulsive decision but well thought off by me

My most important reason for doing this is that I don't want to start hating you, yes m angry at you angry at everyone around me angry at god angry at my own self but I do not hate anyone yet but I know for sure if remain living there I would start hating everyone and you to which I did not want

Angry at you for never keeping your any promise you made to me, for always taking me and my happiness as for granted , I understand that anjali ji is important to you but do I hold no importance does me being happy or sad doesn't matter to you, you accused me in shayam's matter u misunderstood everything u tortured me you made me orphan again after knowing what pain u feel being an orphan is u called me all those things that a girl could never listen about herself but still I forgave you easily coz u promised you won't repeat it you would love me would take care of me but u again snatched my happiness for your di's you never thought that the pain u are giving me is same which your di is unable to handle but do you know it was more painful for me because my own love who claimed to love me back was giving me that same pain to relive his sister of it

I m angry at your family because they never considered me their family when u married me it was equally your fault everyone blamed only me as if I was the one who forced you to get married to me, none of them ever tried to understand me my pain taunted me at every given chance but still I forgave them but what did they do none of them just like u understood that I was equally victim in shayam;s matter even more harassed one than your sister but asked me to hide from your sister so that she doesn't recall her cheat husband never thought what i would feel about it what I feel being treated as a culprit they asked me give my baby to your di just like you instead of stopping u so that she can remain happy never thought how I would feel about it

I m angry gupta family for always treating me like adopted what pain's more than being orphan is being adopted and being treated as an adopted all your life despite all your efforts at being one of them payalji was always first for them never stopping to think about what it could do to me when they ask me to do certain things that would ensure payalji s happiness

I m angry at god and my fate to always keep testing my patience my will to be strong my will to fight by always putting me in dire situations

I m angry at myself for succumbing to everyone's force and giving away my own baby to some else, someone who breaks at slight winds thrown by life how would she be able to make my daughter strong enough to with stand turbulent storms that life throws at everyone at one or other point in life I m angry myself for always letting people take me for granted for never voicing out my distress my disappointment with people , for forgetting who I really am to become a person who everyone around me would like me to be

From 11 long years after my parents death I abandoned my real self I abandoned the khushi Sharma that I am to be the khushi gupta that gupta family would like, to be the khushi raizada that raizada family would like I changed my dressing to my personality to my likes and dislikes to appease people around me thinking that doing that would make them really accept me and they would love me forgetting that one can truly be happy with someone's love if that someone accepts you for what you really are

I am angry at myself for abandoning my dreams I am angry to think maybe I would not have been a good a mother to my child for I would I taught her the same mistakes I did in my life

I am living arnavji I am leaving everything to start a new I am going to discover myself I am going to fulfil my dreams I am going away from everyone here so that I would keep myself as my first priority I am going so that I could sort out my happiness I am going so that I could keep myself respect intact I am going away to be the real me

And I don't want you to keep hanging in life because of me that is why I have signed the divorce papers and kept it in cupboard where you keep your important documents

I singed those so that when some day you meet someone whom you think can understand you and love you could marry her and live your life happily without thinking of me or unnecessarily being tied to me and you could check in all clause I don't think I left anything important out there I don't want anything from you and where till it is matter of aditi you already have legal papers signed for that so you don't have to worry about your di's happiness being at stake