Lightening cut the night sky and monsoon rain sheeted itself against the windows of Kabir's car as he sped it down the lonely Delhi roads. A floating silence had dawned upon the interiors of the car with the exception of the wipers swiping back and forth against the windshield and the soft music playing on radio. Every now and then the two of them would steal glances at each other and then look away when the other noticed.
Overwhelmed by the intensity of the moment, she rested her head against the glass window and stared outside broodingly. He glanced at her from his shoulder, wondering where to start. He pursed his lips ruefully as the despair in her eyes made his heart twitch with pain. Once again the storm of his shady past had brought fury into the life of the people around him, and unfortunately this time, the person who had to take all that devastation on herself was no one else but the girl who means the world to him, his Ananya!
The politician whom Kabir had challenged by exposing his wealth publicly through Richa's bulletin, had taken a dig over his character and tried to slander his image by leaking on national television some of his old photographs with Tarini, out of which, one had him hugging and consoling her.
It had been a while now since Kabir and Ananya confessed their feelings to each other and they were still in the phase of getting accustomed to this beautiful mess their lives had become with each other's warming presence in it. Slowly Ananya had managed to break through the thick walls he'd built around himself, one by one, until he couldn't deny it anymore. Or give into her charms. But as much as it would give him sheer happiness to bask in the warmth of her love, it would worry him, when she looked at him with such loving eyes. He had never experienced such blind trust in his life and it scared him to death to even imagine a day any incident of his past would thwart her trust, leaving her hopes dashed. Something that would often force him to make planned, thoughtful attempts to talk to her about his past, but she would simply not oblige. And thus as he had always feared, this unexpected throw back to his past today, had suddenly taken their relationship by a storm, threatening to wreck their lives in its wake.
"Ananya ek sawal puchun tumse" he spoke, finally breaking the long uncomfortable silence between them.
"hmmm" she mumbled, still looking outside, lost in her thoughts.
A brief stillness followed as he mustered up courage to speak further.
"Aaj jo bhi hua, jo bhi sab tumne dekha, kya ek baar bhi tumhein aisa laga ki usmein koi sach..." he left the sentence incomplete and chose to silently wait for her acknowledgement.
Her heart sank in the pit of her chest as her mind registered his words. She looked away from him, not meeting his gaze.
"Aap aisi baatein kyun kar rahe hain..." she sighed, trying to put an apathetic expression."Aur waise bhi ab in sab baton ka koi matlab nahin hai..." her voice had undertones of deep-seated vulnerability and doubt, that didn't go unnoticed by Kabir.
He slowly closed his eyes and inhaled deeply, trying to rein in his scattered thoughts.
"Matlab hai Ananya...mere liye har uss baat ka matlab hai jo tumse judi hai...jo tumhein taqleef deti hai" He said in a tone that made her skip a few breaths. There was something so intense and painful in his voice that she could not help but stare back at him, looking straight into his eyes.
"Yaad hai us din tumne kaha tha ki vishwas aakhein band karke hota hai, woh sach tha, par ek sach aur bhi hai" he paused gingerly, trying to fight the knot in his throat. "Aur woh ye ki aankhein band kar lene se sach badal nahin jata Ananya, aur hum chahen ya na chahen, kabhi na kabhi humein uss sach ko accept karna hi padhta hai...we just can't escape the truth" he whispered softly to her, his voice gruff and strained with emotion.
Ananya sighed painfully looking down at her phone, still trying to avoid his questions. He always knew this conversation was not going to be an easy one. Looking at the thunderstorm getting worse he decelerated the car and parked it near a roadside stall. Swallowing a thick lump in his throat he took a calming breath and took her hand into his, noting the contrast. While hers were small and relatively smooth, his were large and calloused. Even though they were obviously different, they fit well together, much like their relationship.
"I want to tell you something" he spoke, looking intently at her face while she continued to stare down, gaze stuck on their clasped hands that peacefully rested on her lap now.
"Ananya there was a time, I mean after my divorce, I had completely lost track of life. There was no one...except silence. And guilt! The guilt of failing myself, and my family. The guilt of being an incompetent husband. Shreya...my ex-wife " He paused briefly as the name brought to him some painful memories of his past, before collecting himself to speak again; "Shreya was my bhabhi's sister and the fact that our marriage was so troubled that it caused her to walk out on me, made my bhabhi broke all ties with me. Dada was helpless; he couldn't leave his wife and his three month old daughter for me. He had to stay back and I was all by myself."
Ananya could almost feel a painful vulnerability settling in his voice now. She never wanted this, never wanted to scratch his wounds like this. But tonight she had no choice but to do it, more for him than for herself. While she badly needed a string of hope to hook onto he needed an outlet for his pent up emotions.
"Ananya at that time if there was someone who became my pillar of strength, it was Tarini and Anurag's presence in my life. Tarini was my best friend Nikhil's fiance, and we three were together since school. Nikhil used to work with me as a junior reporter, but while on a secret sting operation to uncover the truth behind delhi mafia, he lost his life. The militants had realized he was an undercover reporter and not one of them. They shot him in his head. The channel refused to take any responsibility and put the entire blame on Nikhil proving him to be an incapable and juvenile reporter. Some of them even tried to prove him not being mentally fit. Tarini was devastated. Nikhil was the only family she and Anurag had and after him, there was no one she could turn up to. And in those difficult times, we two stood up for each other like a rock, just like any two friends would do. Just like Ronnie and Richa do it for you...but as always the world never cared about the sanctity of the relationship we shared, they never cared about how much Tarini loved Nikhil and how even today, what all she is doing, is to prove to the world, his innocence and his commitment for his job, for his passion. And if being a friend I can do my tiny bit for two of my best friends, then I don't think I owe any explanations to anybody..." Kabir almost chocked at his own words, as helplessness and angst gripped his otherwise powerful diction.
Ananya felt a jabbing pain pull at her heart seeing him become so defenseless. She could no longer look away from him. She sighed and looked up to meet his eyes. A lone drop of tear rolled down her cheek as she placed a hand on his, conveying without words, her love and comfort.
"Ananya I have lost a lot in life, but everytime some way or the other, I used to bounce back. Kabhi mera guilt to kabhi kuch logon ke liye meri sense of responsibility, mujhe woh ek wajah de hi deti thi, duniya se ladne ke liye, apni kamzoriyon se ladne ke liye. Par sach to ye hai ke zindagi mein ladne ki wajah to bahuton ne di, lekin jeene ki wajah, sirf tum ne di hai. Agar aaj main apne past ko peeche chodkar aage badhne ke bare main soch paya hoon, apne charon aur khadi un deewaron ko tod kar, apne dil me ummed ko phirse jagah de pani ki himmat kar paya hoon, to uski wajah tum ho Ananya. Aaj tak kabhi kisi ne bhi agar mujhpe koi sawal uthaya hai ya mujhpe bharosa nahin kiya, to even I didn't care but tum mujhpe bharosa karti ho ya nahin, ye mere liye bahut important hai. Much more than my life! Kyunki agar tumhara bharosa kho diya to main khud ko kho dunga Ananya, hamesha hamesha ke liye. If I ever lose your trust, I would be dead..." He gasped, making Ananya's hand fly to his mouth almost instinctively.
"Shut up and don't you ever dare say that again, in case you don't want me to strangle you to death Mr. Sharma" she snapped at him, eyes glistening with unshed tears. Kabir smiled tenderly, his chocolate brown eyes filled with love.
Silently, she lifted their locked hands closer to her lips, kissing the hills and valleys of his knuckles ever so softly. He reached out to her and placed his palm against her cheek, gently wiping a tear with his thumb. She inhaled sharply, and gathered her up again, her eyes peering at his face through her wet lashes.
"I am sorry to hurt you like this...I hate myself for it" she stammered through her shaky voice, making Kabir sigh at her innocence. He wrapped his arm around her taking her in a half hug and kissed her hair.
"It's not your fault Ananya, I should have told you" he tried to calm her, his one hand coiled around her waist and the fingertips of other softly grazing the tip of her shoulder.
"But how can I doubt you...I am such a fool" she wheezed and clutched his shirt, letting some held back tears fall freely.
"Well if thats the case Ms. Kashyap, I won't say I beg to differ" he chuckled, making her hit him playfully on his shoulder.
"Ouchh" he whined dramatically. "Ms. Kashyap your hand is so damn heavy, don't you think you should be watching your weight" he said in an overtly teasing tone knowing if he didn't apologize the very next second, it would be the death of him. Irritated by his banter she pulled away from him just a bit; not willing to break the contact of his warm body against hers.
"Do you really think I am so fat" she inquired with a cute grumpy expression on her face and if they hadn't been in the midst of such sensitive discussion, he would have pulled her into a long passionate kiss. The small smirk on his lips let her know he was just poking fun at her and trying to cheer her up.
She gave him a crooked smile and moved to lay her head down on his broad chest once again. His arm tightened around her and she nestled closer to him, nuzzling his neck.
"I trust you Kabir...but this time my trust won't be blind. I will listen to you, to your past, the whole of it and then there wont ever be another moment of doubt" her voice was small but firm, and she looked up at him, scanning his eyes for some affirmation. Kabir smiled and tucked a stray strand of hair behind her ear.
"I love you" he whispered and kissed her forehead.
And that took her breath away.
She quietly snuggled into his chest, savoring the warmth of his strong protective arms around her. And he wanted her, needed her, now more than ever, like nothing he'd ever known.
Slightly lifting his head up, he leaned closer to her and brushed his lips against her, marveling at the soft fullness of her lips. She moaned softly and a surge of passion overtook him.
Lightening glistened in the sky outside and rains pattered heavily against the glass windows, drowning out all other sounds.
Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi 2
Real Estate
