IshRa FF Strangers Chapter 22-27 Page 94-95 *Completed* (3/3/15) - Page 26

Chapter 11

The pain in her eyes stabbed at his heart. She seemed so lost, so lonely. Without thought, he reached out to her. With one hand he cupped her cheek. She turned her face to look at him through teary eyes. He moved closer to her and with gentle care, he kissed the tears from her eyes. She looked so vulnerable, so delicate, Raman felt a tightening in his chest. His hands moved of their volition to gather her closer - wanting to feel her softness; wanting to feel her warmth; wanting to feel her comfort; wanting to feel her love.

As his arms moved over her waist to the small of her back, pressing her to him, Ishita felt overwhelming emotions flood her. There was something so right about being in his arms - like she was meant be held in his arms; like this was the one place she would feel safe. She gently raised her head to look at him. His hand came up and he brushed away the moisture from the corner of her eye. His finger traced the outline of her face in a gentle stroke down to the column of her throat before falling away. His gaze followed the path of his finger and returned back up to lock with hers. They sat there for long moments, simply looking at each other.

Ishita raised her hand and ran her fingers over his face. Raman's eyes closed in response as she gently traced the contours of his face as if committing it to memory. The truth was that she wanted to commit everything about this moment to memory. Her hand then moved downward and rested on his heart. His heart seemed to leap in response to her caress. Raman gently lifted her chin to look into her eyes. Normally, he wouldn't have given it a second thought. But tonight, he hesitated. He wanted to kiss her. The desire to feel her lips against his, feel her respond to him was pulsing through him with the same intensity that his heart was thudding against his ribs. Yet, he hesitated. This was wrong. She was sad, vulnerable. She would regret it come morning. He was supposed to be the sane, sensible one in this situation. He should walk away. But he did not.

Ishita sensed his hesitance. She, however, had no hesitation or doubts. She wanted this. For once, she wanted something for herself - to feel loved; even if it was just for tonight. She wanted to be comforted; by him, in his arms. She wanted to let go - of everything that held her back. She wanted.. she wanted him. She pulled him towards her and locked her lips with his. She wanted to give - her heart, her mind, her body, her soul, her love - everything that was hers, she wanted to give him. Knowing very well that this would only bring her heartache, knowing there was nothing more for them maybe beyond even just this night. But they had this night, this one night when she could forget her past, her pain and breathe life into her dreams and desires she'd locked away for so long. Just this one night, Ishita Vishwanathan Iyer was going to throw caution to the wind and listen to her heart; she was going to steal these moments from life that fate had denied her forever.

She was so incredible, Raman thought to himself. A part of him kept telling him to push her away. This was wrong. She did not know what she was doing and yet a part of him reveled in the innocent intensity of her kiss. She had never been kissed before. It didn't take him two seconds to figure that out. But he also sensed the underlying intensity of her kiss. Like she needed this. Like she needed him. Right now, he was her passion - with all her honesty and sincerity - he was what she desired. The thought caused a flutter in his heart. He pulled her closer, deepening the kiss in a way that made him lose control - and he normally never lost control; especially not in situations like these, especially after the lesson his past had taught him. But tonight was different, Ishita was different, what they shared was different.

He broke away from the kiss to rest his forehead against hers. Their eyes stayed closed and their breathing was labored. Raman gently opened his eyes. This most definitely was not his first kiss but it felt delightfully special. Her closed eyes, flushed face and moist lips sent ripples of sensation through him. He ran his thumb over her lower lip and watched her eyes open slowly. Her clear hazelnut eyes melted his insides. She blushed but there was no trace of surprise or doubt in her eyes as she locked her gaze with his. He placed her on the bed gently and slid in next to her. He kissed her, mapping her out every beautiful, fascinating inch by inch with his lips - passionately yet gently, blazingly intense yet caring. Ishita buried her hands in his hair and held him tighter as sensations pounded through her with fervor. Her fingers threading through his hair stirred desire in Raman with unmatched intensity. He'd never felt this way before. No one had evoked such intense feelings in him ever before. No one had unleashed desire in such an uncontrollable manner in him ever before. It wasn't just lust that pounded his veins but the desire to love her. To take what she was offering and give himself up in return. To worship her - the strength, the beauty, the simplicity, the honesty, everything that defined her; not just make love to her body. They touched, they kissed, they loved - the way Ishita had never been with anyone else and Raman had never felt with anyone else. Both of them responded to each other like they were meant to be; like pieces of a puzzle that fit perfectly only with each other. As their love and passion consumed them, he immersed himself in her again and again and she melted in his arms each time, taking him in - into her heart, body and soul.

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Ishita stood at the window watching the early morning rays of sun brighten up the room. She heard the ruffling of sheets from behind but she did not turn.

Raman woke up to sunlight streaming in from the open window. He covered his eyes and wondered where he was for a few minutes. Then he saw her - standing by the window and he remembered. Normally, it wouldn't have been a great deal. But with Ishita, it was different. He felt guilty - genuinely guilty. He got off the bed and went up to stand beside her. She did not even acknowledge his presence and Raman felt a tightening in his chest. "Ishita.. I.."

"No Raman. Don't say anything," Ishita cut him.

He watched her to gauge what was running through her mind. She turned towards him slowly and looked him in his eyes as she said, "Appa has always told me to listen to my heart and that's exactly what I did last night. I don't hold you responsible so don't apologize. I have no regrets.. And I promise I will never cause you any trouble because of this. What happened between us was, is and will always remain special to me.. I know you might not understand and I don't expect you to. I expect nothing from you Raman. Just trust me when I say, I won't be an unwanted burden in your life," she managed to smile at him before she turned to walk away.

Impulsively, he caught hold of her hand.

What was he doing? He was getting the fair end of the bargain. She had just assured him she wouldn't be giving him hell for what happened between them. He should have been happy and relieved - but he wasn't. He wanted to say or do something to make the tightness in his chest go away. But how? Or what?

"I won't apologize" he found himself saying. "Because I don't think I did anything wrong. In fact, nothing has ever felt so right before, like it was meant to be." His words surprised him more than they surprised Ishita. His brain scolded him for being a fool while he felt good from within and his confusion mirrored in his eyes. Ishita turned to look at him.

"Don't say things you don't mean to because you feel you have to Raman," Ishita told him. "How do you know I didn't mean what I said?" he asked her. "I can see it in your eyes. Whether it was supposed to happen that way or not, I've gotten to know you really well," she struggled not to cry.

"What if I want to?" he argued with her while his brain told him to shut up and accept whatever she was saying. "You don't. Because if anything, all of this is temporary. One day or the other, we are going to get out of here. Beyond here, your world and mine are totally different. You and I are totally different. Anything more than that is impossible," Ishita told him. "And what about us, here and now? Are you telling me you'll forget all of this and go about your life like nothing happened?" he asked her, the pain in his chest coming back with intensity. "This place, these moments, what we shared will always be special to me.. You will be special to me.. What we shared, I can never share with anyone else nor will I ever.. But I also know there can't be anything more to us.. Just as I know that you can and you will be able to move on in life even after this" she stated calmly.

Was she really unaffected by all of this? Raman tried to read what was going in her heart through her eyes. He knew what she was saying was right. There could never be a future together for them. They were poles apart. If it hadn't been for that murder, they probably wouldn't even have met each other ever. Their lives, their outlooks toward life - everything was different. And he was a fool. If there was anything he should have learnt from his past, it should have been to never lose control. He had been a fool. Absolute fool to be repeating his mistake. Could he trust her on what she said? That she would never give him Hell for what had happened between them? His heart told him he could but his brain told him otherwise. He had trusted his heart once, only to be fooled. Could he trust his heart again? There was too much going on. Too much to think about. He reluctantly let go of her hand and watched her walk away.

Nothing in her mannerisms indicated that she was undergoing the same kind of emotional trauma that he was. There was something about her - she was infuriating, yet she was incredibly irresistibly feminine. She was smart, witty, simple, complicated, crazy and sensible - all rolled into one and he knew from somewhere deep within that he could trust her. She wasn't double faced. She was honest, pure, real and before last night, untouched.

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