Submissive mothers played a major role in the havoc of Mehbeer

shruthiravi thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
#1
Yesterday epi bought out clearly one of the clear fault lines in Mehbeer relations. It was the fault in the relations of their parents. Unconsciously they tried to carry the same marriage template in their life which flopped to a large extent.
Look at the convo between Kuber and his wife. How disrespectful Kuber is of his wife's choices. As if only his choice matters. Maybe he doesn't like his wife watching serial or he might want to watch news channel. There are better ways of expressing it. And of course he has utter disregard of his son's choice and blames his wife for the same.
And look at Abeer's mother. Yes she is talking to him something in private. But she doesn't take a strong stand for her son in public. If Abeer's mother had stood up for Abeer in front of his dad, that would have been a major confident boost for Abeer. But she hasn't. Yes she took him to study music, but most of the things she did covertly. And maybe she too believed what Kuber wanted out of his son was right. The submissive nature of his mother in his parent's relation have given Abeer a superiority complex and he might have expected the same submissiveness from Meher which she might have been unwilling to give. Hence cracks came in their relation.
Having done with Abeer now let us come to Meher's mother. Another submissive lady. Pati Parameeshwar hota hai. Doesn't matter what nonsense he do. I was completely irritated by her yesterday. Just because she is tolerating her good for nothing husband, why she want to push her ex-son in law to her daughter's room. Yes marriage is sacred, but that doesn't mean that once the divorce has happened the ex-husband has to be treated as husband. Just because she is treating Meher's father as husband, she cant expect or force Meher's ex-husband on to her. After seeing her runaway father and submissive mother, Meher might have wanted more control on her married life. She might have tried to control the vagabound Abeer asking him too many why's and what's. The trust deficit that he might ditch her would have made her a control freak, which Abeer's free will nature was not willing to accept. I really felt sorry for Meher yesterday. The memories that came to her and her pain, her mother had no right to do this to her daughter. And believe me her mother's attitude is just paving the way for Tunnu to become either like Abeer or her father. Because Meher's mother justifies such nonsense behavior from the guys as boys do mistakes.
Just would conclude this post by telling if woman make independent choices when they need to, they not only save themselves but also the future generation. If Abeer's mother had openly supported his passion instead of his father's ego, his mother's sensitivity would have come out in him more which would have made him a better person. If Meher's mother had shut the door on her husband after he ditched her, Meher would have never had the trauma of tolerating a man with trust deficit. She would never had the need to control because she might have learned if certain boundaries are crossed in a relation she has a choice to shut out that relation once and for all. That would have given her more emotional stability and she might have been able to manage her marriage better giving freedom wherever necessary.
Edited by shruthiravi - 9 years ago

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Anonymous_K thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
#2
I agree cent percent with you.
Those two important women should have taken a stand for the betterment of their children rather than being happy victims of being treated as doormat by their respective husbands.
Having said that, after yesterday's episode I came to a slightly different conclusion. Why are both the mother-in-laws still in contact and so supportive of MehBeer??- A question that has been ringing in my mind ever since yesterday. It's certain that they both know something more about the bitter past but their figure of speech is being oppressed.
shruthiravi thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
#3
@Anonymous both the mother's have understood that their children are made for each other. Abeer needs a lady like Meher who is organized, have a plan and a vision for the future to tame is completely vagabound nature, and Meher needs a husband like Abeer who has a sensitive and caring nature.
But the problem is the mother's are not understanding the fault lines on their children's relation. Meher cannot control Abeer , he has to understand Meher and on his free will tone down his vagabound nature. Similarly for Abeer's caring and sensitive nature to come forth he has to let go of that supreme ego of his and allow his emotions to flow freely.
They were far young when they married and separated if I consider them around 32-33. They knew each other, but they never understood. Or rather I would say both didn't give space for each other in the relationship
Gems.musingsRN thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
#4
Excellent post shruti!u have completely and deeply explained the undercurrents that'd have led to cracks in mehbeer marriage.
Poor meher is too much hurt,sheds silent tears haunted by memories of abeer and her.that scene was so poignant. It clearly signified something. Abeer always feels that he has loved meher more,but the fact is the reverse,meher deeply loves abeer but not everyone are expressive.
You have explained everything about their mothers.yet somewhere don't u think meher' mom is justified??meher has no plans to move on,tunnu is already rebellious after some years,he'd be even more.he considers his sister as a money minting machine.years later when tunnu has a family what'd be meher's place??and unlike her good for nothing husband,abeer has not left meher for another lady nor moved on.and both the mothers know their childrens' happiness lies with each other.these are her train of thoughts and you can't completely blame meher's mom.
Pata nahin,I find meher's bua more shadier than abeer's dad,she is mysterious, just wants meher to be a reflection of herself,tries to convince meher that abeer is the biggest problem in her life,why??
Yesterday's episode also proved that these two are too egoistic to expose each others feelings or come together,they really need a strong reason for that.
PS:the fb was too good.
And saw dev's entry,his voice is OK(is it same as arnav's in mounam sammatham?)and why is he called jeevan,isn't dev a good name??
Edited by ratna.nanda - 9 years ago
shruthiravi thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
#5
@ratna Meher's mother is justified in the notion that Meher should give a second chance to Abeer. Because as I said Abeer is not good for nothing guy like Meher's father, he is a person with some flaws. But her method is wrong. See the couple needs to be given space the second time. Don't forcefully throw them at each other. They both care for each other and slowly but surely they will come closer as they know each other better. When you force it on the person, it brings more hurt and guilt like Meher felt yesterday. Her beautiful memories should give her strength to fight, not to feel guilty.
Coming to EHT dub I am not sure whether it is Arnav's voice as I don't watch it. But what I liked about it the most was the feel it gave to the FB. Not only his, but the lady who dubs for Nithya the feel of the FB was beautiful. I mean the right emotions was there in the voice unlike Hindi where I had always felt Bhuvnesh and Aditi failed in the bringing up the emotions of the carefree, beautiful friendship of Dev-Nithya and that is where that love story left a blank. But yesterday when Nithya tells come back soon I will be waiting it was so beautiful. The yearning and that feel of missing was so much in her voice. And the Malayalam friendship language tan( You), do( It is not pronounced like "do" in English), da added to the beauty I would say.
Coming to calling him Jeevan, I was sure Malayalam wont use Dev. Reason that name will be difficult to put across rightly with Malayalam dialogues. It looks odd. I was expecting a positive name like Rajiv, Karthik, Ajay etc.. and they have choosen a very symbolic name. Jeevan means life in Malayalam. He is the life, one who is bringing the will to live, happy memories to the traumatized girls and also he is the life for his mother who became a widow at a young age.
Edited by shruthiravi - 9 years ago
Gems.musingsRN thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
#6
😊@shruti her method seems to be wrong,but these two people are so adamant and egoistic that they refuse to be under one roof for 5 minutes,unless abeer is intoxicated and meher has no other choice.do u think that in the present situation,can abeer and meher peacefully sit and have a cup of coffee and have a talk abt their life??
but meher's fb scene was really gud,seeing it,i said aloud[actually]'what really went wrong??',and such fbs make the viewers wish to see them back together like that soon.
what's ur opinion on meher's bua??and did u watch new promo??

regarding EHT,dev's voice is quite impactful and jeevan name is OK but we're used to hearing 'dev',but what i meant is iif they can have names like arnav and saras in malayalam,then what's the problem with dev??
shruthiravi thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
#7
@ratna what did she achieve by throwing Abeer at Meher's room. Nothing except a guilt trip for Meher. Didn't you see when Elton sir's case came how calm both were. Were they fighting. No right. The emotions were expressed rightly. If they are meant to be together they need to realize the rights and wrong which cannot be achieved through Meher's mother's way. It only gives a ego boost to Abeer that even her family thinks she is wrong and he is right. Look at the grin he was giving Meher's bua. In any traumatic situation it is the family's support a person needs. When they themselves tell you are wrong even though indirectly it breaks you from inside. Meher's mother can nudge her towards right direction, but she shouldn't take action for her.
Coming to Meher's bua I have reserved my opinion. I need to see more. And latest promo didn't see.
Edited by shruthiravi - 9 years ago
-Sara. thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
#8
Totally agree with you, Mehers mum really didn't do well yesterday. I mean he's her ex and you're just making it worse for her instead of giving her some space to handle it herself.
loveleen12 thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
#9
Honestly speaking it sometimes seems as if Meher and Abeer haven't even matured sometimes. Not all ex-partners need to have a bitter relationship. Sure they realized that they weren't made to be with each other, but surely they both know that neither Meher nor Abeer is completely evil. They aren't even cordial with each other, that I think was the problem. They both are so egoistic that they don't want to understand what the other person's life is devoid of nor do they want to express the lacking to the other.
slyther_in thumbnail
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Posted: 9 years ago
#10
nice post
i agree with u but i really liked her Mom. She has no ill feeling like her bua na? thats gud
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