CHAPTER 8
So, a few days went by, which were heavy, emotionally, on me and my family, with Urooj coming back into our lives and how, this time she gave us something she owned us for very LONG A JUSTIFIED CLOSURE! She gave us what was our right, I never thought I will ever get the chance to undo what wrongs were done to my brother years back but I also never thought I would be in the situation I was a few days back. I had to save a patient I did not want too because of Bhai but had to save him nonetheless BECAUSE of Daniyal bhai. When we were kids maama used to tell us Stories about Justice and WHAT WAS RIGHT AND WRONG I along with faryal used to listen to them, somewhere they were embedded in me too but it was Daniyal bhai who was exercising them in his real day to day life, I never did until after he passed away. I will always feel guilty that a good human being like him went away so soon, I will always feel guilty that I along with baba did not stand with him when he needed us to understand him the most. I will always feel guilty that sayim never got to meet his father, I will always feel guilty that the vision Daniyal Bhai had seen for me he will not be able to see me turn into that, it was his dream for me to achieve everything in life. I live my life for him and for his teachings now. I live for my family now. I WILL be everything maama and baba thought I should be, I will be the support for Bhabhi and sayim whenever and wherever they want me to be.
Somehwere I felt happy that I could play small part in bringing justice to Daniyal Bhai's name. He taught me everything about being a good human being and being there for others and I am happy through his teachings I was able to bring JUSTICE HOME. If he is looking at me now I want him to know I miss him and always will, a part of me went with him when he passed away.
I wanted to share my feelings with him like I always used too, wanted to tell him about Zobiya when I started liking her and when I fell in love with her, in my heart and mind I still have conversations with Daniyal Bhai, he would have loved her more so because she is a lot like him, what wouldn't I give to see both Daniyal Bhai and Zobia in one frame talking to each other and fighting for others. One of the reasons I started liking Zobia was because she reminded me of Daniyal Bhai and how used to care for others without thinking of the consequences. Zobia would have fitted into our family perfectly. These past few days gave me and my family the much-needed closure which was needed for us to move on, more than anyone of us admitted.
That week me and baba went to Islamabad for a seminar organized by the Bar Council in honor of Daniyal Bhai, which was due and made baba very happy. I could see that he felt very proud standing there on the podium avenging his son, he felt like his old self, in control and in charge, like the barrister that he once was. We both went to Daniyal Bhai grave also, baba broke down there, we both did, it was such an emotional moment for us. I wish Daniyal Bhai was alive today, I wish that every day, I will never stop wishing that ever. Wherever he is now I hope he is at peace and happy. I miss him.
On our way back, baba spoke to me about Zobia, about our marriage and how he wished it was done from Islamabad our old home. I was surprised that he even knew something was going on between me and zobia, I did not know myself. I knew we both liked each other but we both did not say so in so many words. It all JUST HAPPENED. It was more to do with our emotional compatibility and need for each other than anything else, which resulted in us getting comfortable physically also. We both were relaxed around each other unlike earlier. I still am not sure though what she feels for me exactly, as she has still not opened up with me, I had gone away a few days back and asked her to call me, assuming she would considering how we spent time together after Sayim's birthday party but she did not! Not even a msg, I gifted her a suit thinking THIS would get her talking to me yet she held back. I know she care foe me but she is still holding back. I do not know how to break that LAST WALL of hers. Which is why I did not say anything to baba when he asked about how I feel about getting married to Zobia, simply because I DO NOT KNOW where she stands even now.
When we reached back home to Neelum valley baba had told maama to go ahead with the talks concerning mine and zobia's marriage, I told maama to stop everything and let me speak to her first because knowing zobia she gets defensive easily. That night I was thinking how life has taken a turn, turn for the better. I was thanking god for all his blessings and having a quite conversation also with Daniyal Bhai in my heart about how nervous I was about proposing to Zobia. I was smiling the whole time when my phone beeped, I looked at the caller name and the time and smiled.
Asfand 'hello'
Zobia 'kaha chalein gaye the aap?
Asfand 'abhi tak jag rahi hoon, raat ka ek (1am) baaj raha hain'? I asked her while I smiled a little hearing the WIFE in her tone! Oh! Zubia you will be the death of me.
Zobia 'maine apko itni calls ki hain, phone nahi utha rahe, hospital bi nahi aa rahe, aap theek toh hain na'? She asked all this in one breath! Clearly, she is worried about me. I blushed a little, I did not even know I Dr. Asfandyar could blush.
Asfand 'Islamabad gaya hoya tha baba ke saath, waha ek seminar tha, phir who Bhai ke kabbar pe be gaye. Aaj raat wapis aaya hoon. Magar mein bikul theek hoon, balke kafi barso baad pursukun bhi hoon' I said in a very cool and composed manner, remembering all that had happened in the past few days.
Zobia 'Maine Seminar ki coverage dekhi thi TV par'. She said in the most matter of fact manner.
Asfand 'toh mein usme tumhe nazar nahi aaya ju itna pareshan ho rahi hoon'? I asked in the same matter of fact tone, edging her on.
Zobia 'mein pareshan nahi hoon rahi hoon, mein isliye pooch rahi thi ke..; I stopped her mid-sentence, not wanting to play this cat-n-mouse, push-n-pull game for a minute.
Asfand 'sunno, tumhe meri fhikar rehti hain na'?
Zobia 'haan, zahir hain...' she stopped having realized what she just said and what that entails for & makes our relationship into. I could hear her breathing increase even though we were on the opp ends of the phone. I could clearly imagine how her face would have gone red and she would have been dumbstruck but her own admission, her big beautiful eyes just looking straight on without moving an inch. I was laughing a little now thinking all this, she was mum on the other hand, did not utter a single word but her silence speaking a thousand words all the same. I kept laughing at her innocence & naivety, her beautiful face would have been a delight to look at right now if she was in front of me. She disconnected the phone in a jiffy.
I looked at the phone and laughed aloud, looking up and smiling, as if Daniyal Bhai was there to witness all this and was teasing me, thanking god for this good fortune and for bringing Dr. Zobia Khaleel in my life.
Before sleeping I sent her a msg 'I missed you too'. With a smiley face and a heart. That night I had the most peaceful sleep ever. All filled with gratitude and a promise, promise of a good future.
The next morning I was all charged up, was feeling the zeal in life and happiness too. Maama and baba kept looking at me as I drowned my cup of tea and left without eating anything, I told them some urgent meeting was there, and Gaiti Bhabhi ke liye I will send the car back. I picked up my bag and left.
The second I reached the hospital I saw her on her daily morning rounds, she looked pretty in a green salwar kameez, like always chunni on her head, she was a vision to me, in all forms! I stood there for a second before I heard a nurse behind me, asking me to go and meet Dr. Shehroz as he was asking for me, I was about to turn away when she looked towards me and we locked eyes for a micro sec, I smiled and left.
The whole morning, I kept thinking I will talk to her today about our relationship and ask her out properly, on a dinner where we would be able to talk comfortably, without any prying eyes or awkwardness. But I kept missing her everytime, defeated I settled in my room around lunch time when I heard a knock at my door, I looked up and it was her, my everything standing in front of me asking if she could enter, little did she know she already had, she entered my life and had turned it upside down.
Asfand 'abhi tumhe hi yaad kar raha tha, kya haal hain'? I asked in my most charming best ever! But looking at her she was a puzzle, this was not going to be easy!
Zobia 'theek hoon, ummm, aapse zaroori baat karna chahti hoon'. She said with a straight face.
Asfand 'ofcourse, beadt toh jao'.
Zobia 'nahi mein, theek hain aise hi'. I was not able to read her expression atall, it's like there was a purposeful wall drawn on. 'aaah... mein hum dono ke bare mein baat karne aayi hoon'. She added with confidence.
Asfand 'OK' I gestured her to sit down and she did. But there was something off about it, I could feel it in my bones. But I did not listen to anything else, I wanted to pay full attention to the words coming out of her mouth and nothing else.
Asfand 'shakal se lag raha hain ki bahur serious baat hain, sab theek toh hain na'?!! I said in a very nonchalant way!
Zobia 'haan sab theek hain, aaah patta nahi mujhe iss waqt yeh baat karni chahiye ya nahi, mein yeh bhi janti hoon ki yeh jagah shayad munasib nahi hain yeh baat karne ke liye, lekin aah jitni jaldi hum donno ke beech mein saari cheeze clear hojaye utna acha hain'. I was looking at her this whole time, listening to her words, admiring her straight forwardness & courage, her beauty, her eyes, her face, her lips.
Asfand 'kaisi baate'? Is all I could manage to come up with in that moment, I was trying my level best not to blush in front of her right now!!
Zobia 'aapki ammi ne mujhse meri khaala ke ghar ka address manga hain'! She said, again with a very serious and straight face. I laughed though, who would have thought I would, or rather we would be talking about our future, here in the hospital room, while on work! How time has changed!
Asfand 'acha toh yeh hain baat. Maama ne tumse baat kar bhi li. Actually, mein tumse kudh baat karna chahta tha, but, chalo agar maama ne baat kar li hain, thats ok. Actually, humari shaadi ki baat maama aur baba tumhari khaala se karna chahte the toh..' .
Zobia 'Humari shaadi'? she genuinely looked confused, shocked, scared, I could not decide. I laughed, this was becoming my defense mechanism for everything now I realized. 'Hum dono ke beech mein to hiss tarah ki kabhi koi baat hoyi nahi' she added.
Asfand 'acha na I am sorry mein manta hoon ke mujhe tumse kudh baat karni chahiye thi, lekin agar maama ne tumse baat kar li hain toh isme kya problem hain?' I was seriously lost now, I did not know where this was going.
Zobia 'problem yeh hain ki mein shaadi karna hi nahi chahati, na aaj aur na kabhi, na aapse aur na kissi aur se' she said with some angst and frustration. I started laughing at this statement, like seriously why was she mocking me, why was she playing hard to get, ok fine two can play this game.
Asfand 'ok, toh kya karogi'? I asked in a mocking tone thinking that's what the game was, little did I know. I could see her surprised face, as I was laughing as she had never seen me laughing. But her expressions were very varied today, within seconds as if , she composed herself back and added.
Zobia 'mein masak nahi kar rahi, mein ek bahut serious baat karne ke liye aayi hoon aur chahati hoon ke aap bhi meri baato ko seriously le'. She said in a very agitated yet somber tone. Again, I could sense she was not being herself as her expressions changed within seconds, from agitation to shock back to serious.
Asfand 'tum masak kar rahi hoon na'? I asked when she did not say anything else.
Zobia 'nahi, aur na hi iss tarah ki baate masak mein ki jatti hain'!
Asfand 'wajah'? I asked now totally serious and lost, as if somebody had pulled my world apart, stopped my heart by reaching into my chest and very slowly ripping it apart.
Zobia 'mein aapko wajah batane ki pabandh nahi hoon' she said with very unsure words and rhythm, I could sense it.
Asfand 'zubia kya masla hain mujhe batao, mere saath share karo, agar meri koi baat buri lagi hain, meri family ki koi baat buri lagi hain toh, mujhe batao mein sab kuch theek kardoga'. I said desperately, trying to cling onto any hopes of breaking that wall in front of her, trying my level best to hold onto her.
Zobia 'nahi sab kuch theek hain mujhe kissi ki koi baat burin ahi lagi, baat yeh hain ke mein shaadi karne ke liye tayar ho hi nahi abhi' she blurted out, as if rehearsed lines. I was shocked and more than anything sad.
Asfand 'akir kyu, kyu hum, hum donno ek dusre se mohobbat karte hain, meri family tumhe pasand karti hain, mein tumhe pasand karta hoon, toh..' I knew I was losing this battle and I did not even know why!
Zobia' kaisi mohobbat? Na aapne kabhi iss baat ka ikrar kiya aur nahi maine, humare beech mein iss tarah ki koi commitment toh thi hi nahi na kabhi bhi! Jaaha tak humare relation ki baat hain, haan waqti tor pe ek insaan se attraction or infatuation hoon jatti hain, lekin iska matlab yeh nahi hain ki aap uss shaksh se shaadi kar le'!! Again, she blurted out rehearsed lines. She seemed shocked at her own words, I was hurt but I could see my hurt reflected in her eyes aswell. She got up and was about to reach for the door when I got up too and held her hand. She did not turn to look at me, which left me talking to her back.
Asfand 'kya..kya kaha tumne, kaisi mohobbat? Are you serious Zobia! You are seriously asking me this question, I thought we were mature enough to understand and talk about our feeling without having to resort to such behavior'. I said and pulled her back, holding her tight against my chest, my hands on her waist, holding her a little too tight, our hearts were beating at the same rate, we both could sense it, making her face me, her face only inches apart. She was still smelling of the same scent which had kept me awake many a night, trying to figure out which flower it was, her eyes which were now glued to mine, asking me questions, many a times, her face which was so close to mine I couldn't help but get lost in those eyes, I was searching for my answer which I knew her eyes will give me even though her mouth had its own mind. 'kyu kar rahi hoon yeh, whats wrong zobia'? Her lips were trembling, I think they were trying to form words but could not or rather did not want to utter a single word, my hands went up to her lips and caressed the lower one with my thumb, I knew she could feel it too, the electricity between us, the unknown force which bound us together. She tried her best to keep calm, I could sense it, instead she moved her hand up to my face, cupping my cheek, she let out a heavy deep rooted sigh, as if standing defeated within herself. Her eyes were speaking to me but I did not understand in what context, they were filled with confusion and conviction all in one.
With one hand on her waist and the other still caressing her lower lip, my head bent down and I kissed her nape. Feeling her soft skin next to my lips was heaven on earth, i knew she would be this beautiful always but having this moment right now with her, somewhat in consent like always yet not sure, was something else. She tightens her hold on me as if holding onto dear life, I kissed her nape again and rested my head in the same place, I whispered 'please don't do this'.
TO BE CONTINUED...
CHAPTER 8
. 'kyu kar rahi hoon yeh, whats wrong zobia'? Her lips were trembling, I think they were trying to form words but could not or rather did not want to utter a single word, my hands went up to her lips and caressed the lower one with my thumb, I knew she could feel it too, the electricity between us, the unknown force which bound us together. She tried her best to keep calm, I could sense it, instead she moved her hand up to my face, cupping my cheek, she let out a heavy deep rooted sigh, as if standing defeated within herself. Her eyes were speaking to me but I did not understand in what context, they were filled with confusion and conviction all in one.
YAAS BOY GO TELL HER! STOP HER & MAKE HER REALIZE!
With one hand on her waist and the other still caressing her lower lip, my head bent down and I kissed her nape. Feeling her soft skin next to my lips was heaven on earth, i knew she would be this beautiful always but having this moment right now with her, somewhat consent like always, not sure, was something else. She tightens her hold on me as if holding onto dear life, I kissed her nape again and rested my head in the same place, I whispered 'please don't do this'.
OH MY GOD! *DEAD* ☺️
TO BE CONTINUED...
I LOVE THIS! you write so well, give us such a beautiful insight of these characters. Your version of scenes are so beautiful.. ❤️I am glad you made Asfi stop Zubiya, 'please dont do this' oh my poor boy!🥺Can't wait to read what happens next & how zubiya reacts! ⭐️
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