Age difference: Your take?

The Jhumar track made me ponder - what if I were in her shoes and at the age of 18, was asked to marry a 35 year old man? The though itself caused me to cringe!

Personally I think it's ridiculous how, in the rural Indian societies all you need to get your girl married is a 'good' guy who runs a business. Does anything else not matter? How about their mental compatibility? Would a 35 year old man seriously be able to live with a girl of 18, who is far more immature than him at this stage? How would they deal with their day to day matters? She's almost half his age. And how would she feel that she has to spend her life with a man who's so much older than her - almost a fatherly figure since people marry early in villages and the age gap between parents and their children must range from 17 - 22 years.

So what do you all think? Is it acceptable for two people to get married if there's a vast age gap between them, just because she is virtuous and he's well educated?

i knw ..... but . nobody is thinking abt that....... n that guy ... he looks tooooo old yaar

Personally I'm not for a vast age diff...... It creates alot of issues within the family as well as the husband and wife. But our Indian system supports it saying that the male is more matured and is very good for the family but they don't realize that the communication gap is too much as well as the thinking wavelength between the two.

Mental compatibility is the least concern when it comes to marriage, especially in rural area. Going by the skewed sex ratio, I doubt there is a dearth of eligible guys. But as Abi said, that's how the Indian system works.


A couple of generations back, vast age difference was a norm. I remember many of my grand-aunts who were almost a decade and half younger than their husbands. In today's day and age, its rudiculous that people still follow this.

At least this guy doesn't seem so bad. He actually wants to know Jhoomar's opinion, which is still rare in India.

@ Roshaan - He does look too old for her. Not just looks, but he is.

@ Abi - I completely agree! Age difference creates a communication gap and while the guy makes a good living and the girl manages the household efficiently, as a couple they are seldom able to connect that well.

@ Pretty.woman - Exactly. I can't stand the mindset that people like Ammaji have. "Ladka acha hai, end of story. Who cares about the girl or her wishes? She should be grateful that she is getting a husband in the first place."

@ Sandy - Yeah, a lot of women in the previous centuries married men who were a lot older than them. It's really quite pathetic that people follow this tradition even today.

@Ambodidi - Indeed, I was pleasantly surprised that he asked Jhumar's opinion. It's good that he wasn't portrayed as a negative guy just because he's the third angle between Dheeraj and Jhumar. That said, my post pertained to real life more than it did to Jhumar's situation though - the concept of older man / younger woman is really regressive.

i think Jhoomar will get married 2 dheeraj and not that old guy.It wud b better if they show it like that.

i was actually surprised when even sia and sheela look so happy regarding the proposal..i mean i can understand the rest of the ladies,but sia?????isnt she supposed to b, umm, lets say, yeah the word is educated????

exactly! i was really surprised by her reaction!

I think the very reason is that which Sarah stated! Sia is educated.... but she is alos, intelligent enough to understnad that ammaji has not even a wee bit of compassion for Jhumar! so, that she is getting her married in a "decent" family, was a lot more than Jhumar could have asked for!