Sorry.. I don’t have time right now to read all the chapters but I did get a bunch of notifications when you added a new chapterOriginally posted by: BrhannadaArmour
Post 1 of 3; please read all three posts.
Question for my Followers: did you get notifications when I added Chapters Twenty-Two through Twenty-Five?
You are listed as a Follower of this story in the Fan Fiction section. So, I thought you would get a notification whenever I added a new chapter, and I stopped tagging you in this thread.
I've noticed that members who follow me voluntarily are listed in my profile under My Followers, and two of them have been giving Likes on my latest chapters in the Fan Fiction section. Members like you, who were automatically added as Followers of this story, aren't listed in my profile. Although you used to comment or react in this thread, you haven't done so lately, and only one of you gave a Like on one of the last four chapters.
I know that the chapters are long, so maybe you haven't made time to read them, or you might have lost interest in this story. No problem, this is only for fun. However, if you could take the time to tell me: did you get notifications, yes or no, I would appreciate it.
Read the chapter...a lot is going on here as I can tell... liked how you have humanised Mandaar but feeling a bit bad for Raghav.. to be so judged by his own mother when he did what he did to keep his family comfortable felt very painful. It really brought back the pathos I had felt while watching him stare coldly at his bleeding arm as if he and his wounds didn't really matter (epi 1).
The boyfriend case was explained well here. You have woven a very layered story. Hopefully will be able to make time to return to read the full story some time soon.
Thank you so much for the thoughtful comment, twerping. When you read the story from the beginning, you may feel more than a bit bad for Raghav! Chapter Twenty-Five only tells you about a rough patch in his life nine years ago, but the other chapters tell you the story in the present, beginning with Mandar's return just after Raghav has tried to save Kirti from Pallavi's pursuit of justice, without telling Pallavi that he loves her ...
Raghav in my story gets hurt and feels very lonely, but he's no longer the solitary man who scoffed at Ramakrishna's offer to clean his wounds. Raghav has Luṅgīvālā Raghav, Jaya, Damayanti, surprisingly Mandar, and even Kirti to remind him that his life matters. This is a story of Raghav's self-discovery and growth into the hero of my other story, Delivery Boy.
https://www.indiaforums.com/fanfiction/1793
I enjoyed writing this latest chapter because it reveals Raghav's secret from three points of view almost simultaneously. Although Jaya is speaking from her own point of view, your sympathy is with Raghav's point of view. I was trying to write in such a way that the reader understands both characters' justifications for the extreme choices that they made. Of course, Jaya's and Raghav's choices are a heavy burden for poor Pallavi to forgive! The third point of view is Mandar's insight into Raghav after hearing about the boyfriend case.
There are parallels throughout the story between Raghav having been rejected and Mandar anticipating rejection, Mandar trying to do what is right for his family and Raghav having trouble fixing what he has wrecked with Pallavi, Kirti, and Jaya. The two men's life experiences are totally different, and yet they might sympathize with each other's emotional needs.
Originally posted by: BrhannadaArmour
Thank you so much for the thoughtful comment, twerping. When you read the story from the beginning, you may feel more than a bit bad for Raghav! Chapter Twenty-Five only tells you about a rough patch in his life nine years ago, but the other chapters tell you the story in the present, beginning with Mandar's return just after Raghav has tried to save Kirti from Pallavi's pursuit of justice, without telling Pallavi that he loves her ...
Raghav in my story gets hurt and feels very lonely, but he's no longer the solitary man who scoffed at Ramakrishna's offer to clean his wounds. Raghav has Luṅgīvālā Raghav, Jaya, Damayanti, surprisingly Mandar, and even Kirti to remind him that his life matters. This is a story of Raghav's self-discovery and growth into the hero of my other story, Delivery Boy.
https://www.indiaforums.com/fanfiction/1793
I enjoyed writing this latest chapter because it reveals Raghav's secret from three points of view almost simultaneously. Although Jaya is speaking from her own point of view, your sympathy is with Raghav's point of view. I was trying to write in such a way that the reader understands both characters' justifications for the extreme choices that they made. Of course, Jaya's and Raghav's choices are a heavy burden for poor Pallavi to forgive! The third point of view is Mandar's insight into Raghav after hearing about the boyfriend case.
There are parallels throughout the story between Raghav having been rejected and Mandar anticipating rejection, Mandar trying to do what is right for his family and Raghav having trouble fixing what he has wrecked with Pallavi, Kirti, and Jaya. The two men's life experiences are totally different, and yet they might sympathize with each other's emotional needs.
Thank you for the link. Will try to read that as well. Raghav to me has always come across as someone whose decisions in life was almost a process of coercion at the hands of Pallavi and Jaya. His marriage, his business, his drinking-- you won't marry? Wait, then you will be alone all your life! you won't give up your networks with the underworld? Wait, you might just lose Pallavi and she will die! You won't give up drinking? Wait, you might get into a drinking challenge and then have no control over what you do in that state! And somehow by being coerced, emotionally he becomes a fulfilled person.
So it is good that your story tries to give him a sort of emotional journey that he might have more agency in.
That's quite true. Raghav was never given time to grow to love Pallavi, consider doing honest business, or realize that he doesn't need to drink anymore. I've said before, each of these subjects could have been good drama if they had been used to explore the characters. Instead ...
The whole forced marriage track was a house of cards that would have fallen apart if anyone had used their brains or even listened to Kirti. In spite of Pallavi living with Jaya, Pallavi never knew that Jaya wanted the marriage! Jaya told Raghav to marry Pallavi, and left it up to him how to make it happen, so he grabbed his gun! In Chapter Twenty-Five, I had Jaya say at least that she thought Raghav would take back his lies, ask Pallavi's forgiveness, and then propose and seek her parents' blessing. But wouldn't it have made more sense for Jaya to say, "Raghav, when you agree, tell me, and I will take the proposal to Sharada jī?"
I haven't retconned the forced marriage, but in Chapter Five, Jaya talks to Raghav about the expectations that come with family and marriage, and Raghav decides to prove himself.
https://www.indiaforums.com/fanfiction/1792
I wrote my story Antarāya-timir'opaśāntaye about Pallavi dealing with Raghav's criminality several weeks before the Pallavi-wants-law-abiding-Raghav track began. Instead of creating drama with dialogue between two characters who love each other, the show had Raghav always too drunk to discuss anything for five fictional days in a row, Pallavi taking action just to annoy Raghav, while obstructing justice for his sake, and Raghav not even trusting Pallavi when she tried to save him from arrest. It became impossible to cheer for this couple.
The show never took Raghav's drinking seriously, and the drinking-causes-infertility-which-is-the-same-as-impotency joke, the getting-drugged-out-of-a-shared-bottle adultery retcon, and Raghav trying to slit his wrist with a broken bottle while drunk with guilt over his last drunken mistake ... all were just for shock value. I tried to be more humane about Raghav's drinking through conversations with Kirti in Chapter Thirteen, and with Jaya in Chapter Sixteen.
Originally posted by: BrhannadaArmour
That's quite true. Raghav was never given time to grow to love Pallavi, consider doing honest business, or realize that he doesn't need to drink anymore. I've said before, each of these subjects could have been good drama if they had been used to explore the characters. Instead ...
The whole forced marriage track was a house of cards that would have fallen apart if anyone had used their brains or even listened to Kirti. In spite of Pallavi living with Jaya, Pallavi never knew that Jaya wanted the marriage! Jaya told Raghav to marry Pallavi, and left it up to him how to make it happen, so he grabbed his gun! In Chapter Twenty-Five, I had Jaya say at least that she thought Raghav would take back his lies, ask Pallavi's forgiveness, and then propose and seek her parents' blessing. But wouldn't it have made more sense for Jaya to say, "Raghav, when you agree, tell me, and I will take the proposal to Sharada jī?"
I haven't retconned the forced marriage, but in Chapter Five, Jaya talks to Raghav about the expectations that come with family and marriage, and Raghav decides to prove himself.
https://www.indiaforums.com/fanfiction/1792
I wrote my story Antarāya-timir'opaśāntaye about Pallavi dealing with Raghav's criminality several weeks before the Pallavi-wants-law-abiding-Raghav track began. Instead of creating drama with dialogue between two characters who love each other, the show had Raghav always too drunk to discuss anything for five fictional days in a row, Pallavi taking action just to annoy Raghav, while obstructing justice for his sake, and Raghav not even trusting Pallavi when she tried to save him from arrest. It became impossible to cheer for this couple.
The show never took Raghav's drinking seriously, and the drinking-causes-infertility-which-is-the-same-as-impotency joke, the getting-drugged-out-of-a-shared-bottle adultery retcon, and Raghav trying to slit his wrist with a broken bottle while drunk with guilt over his last drunken mistake ... all were just for shock value. I tried to be more humane about Raghav's drinking through conversations with Kirti in Chapter Thirteen, and with Jaya in Chapter Sixteen.
haha! Your description of the show track is so apt! Will try to make time to read all three stories. Thanks for the links.
Chapter Twenty-Six
As they walked out of the hospital, Mandar's legs were trembling with excitement, and Farhad put an arm around his waist to steady him. Memories of embracing Farhad in Dr. Ramya's house last night, and this morning when Farhad had given him good news, were sweet for Mandar now. He felt understood, protected by Farhad's touch, and wanted to keep it with him. Mandar put his arm around Farhad's shoulders.
"What are you feeling, mere pyāre Mandar?" Farhad asked with a smile on his lips.
"I finally know what happened to me that night! Ever since I found myself in a taxi with Sulochana Kākū two years and eight months ago, I wondered how I could lose touch with everyone who knew me. And these past three days, knowing that the woman who took me to Amma's clinic was Sulochana Kākū, and that she wanted Dr. Janaki to keep quiet, I was impatient to find out what Dr. Janaki knew. I thought she would never tell me the truth, but you made it happen, Farhad!"
Mandar's face was glowing with relief, and he spontaneously gave Farhad's cheek a kiss.
Farhad blushed. "You're proud of me! You have no regrets about us convincing Dr. Janaki by my method?"
Farhad's method? Mandar thought. Farhad had threatened Dr. Janaki, making her listen to a story about being abducted in a speeding car, heading for a cliff. Raghav had actually put Dr. Kanika in that danger. It was Raghav's method that had almost gotten Farhad killed. Didn't that memory trouble Farhad at all?
"Mandar?" Farhad saw that his friend's eyes were studying his face, lost in thought. They had reached the car. "Mandar ... Raja!"
"Sorry," Mandar responded, startled. "I'm listening."
"Mandar Raja. I think I'll call you that from now on. It suits you. All right?"
Mandar liked the sound of Farhad's voice saying both his names. "All right," he said quietly. They got into the car.
"Tell me, Mandar Raja, why were you looking at me like that?" Farhad asked, as they buckled their seat belts.
"Raghav would have killed you along with himself and Dr. Kanika."
Farhad hadn't expected this. "He didn't mean to. When Raghav Anna gets furious ..."
"Don't make excuses for him!"
"You're right. Anna doesn't know when to stop. He's a danger to me and to himself. Luck must be on his side, because so far ..."
"This isn't a joke!"
"Sorry!" Farhad touched both of his hands to Mandar's cheeks, lightly. "Next time, I'll ask Anna to spare my life. He won't say no."
Mandar said nothing. He just looked at Farhad. Farhad smiled, and Mandar couldn't help smiling back.
Someday soon, Farhad thought, Mandar Raja, you will tell me what right you have to worry about me. Who am I to you? Yā Allāh, if I ever have to ask You to spare my life, let Mandar be one of the reasons I want to live longer.
As Farhad started the car, Mandar called Sharada to tell her that he would be home soon, and not to let Bābā worry, he wasn't alone on the road, Farhad would keep him safe. Mandar knew that he should tell Pallavi his whereabouts too. Pallavi might expect that Farhad had taken Mandar home already. Was Mandar neglecting his wife when she needed comfort? If she heard joy in his voice because he had just kissed Farhad ... Mandar sent Pallavi a text: "Mī gharacyā vāṭevara āhe. Farhad malā poçavūna gharī zāīla. Tū thakalī asaśīla. Ārāma kara, āṇi kāhī bolāyaçe asela tara kadhīhī malā call kara." I'm on my way home. Farhad will drop me off and go home. You must be tired. Take rest, and if you want to talk about anything, call me anytime.
Farhad took his chance to speak as soon as Mandar finished texting. "Mandar Raja, now we know how Sulochana Kākū was able to take you out of Hyderabad without anyone in your family finding out. Vipul Kadam, the watchman at the Hotel Crosto, witnessed your accident. Vedant Pillai told him your name and Raghav Anna's name. Mr. Kadam was a regular informant of Sulochana Kākū - I mean, Sulochana Deshmukh, and he guessed that you might be her relative, so he called her. That's how she got the news of your accident before anyone else. She didn't tell Pallavi jī or your Āī-Bābā because she wanted to take Manasi and Amruta with her to meet Raghav Anna."
"Or, she couldn't wait to call the hospital in case I was dead!" Mandar exclaimed bitterly.
Farhad wanted to hug Mandar, but he couldn't do it while driving. "Not to defend your Kākū at all, but we listened to the recording of that first phone conversation, and she didn't ask that question; she only asked if Raghav Rao had brought in Mandar Deshmukh. The receptionist told Kākū that her description of Mandar Deshmukh matched a patient who had minor injuries after being hit by a car, but the forms were still being filled out and the receptionist didn't know who Raghav Rao was. It was about ten minutes later that Dr. Janaki called and asked Kākū to bring your proof of identity to the hospital. Kākū probably used that time to think of an excuse to take Manasi and Amruta to the hospital without the rest of your family."
"Well, she forgot that plan as soon as Dr. Janaki told her that I had memory loss. Kākū decided to make me disappear ... Dr. Janaki took her bribe and lied to Raghav that I went home with my family ... and Raghav didn't try to find me and return my engagement ring because it was more important to cover up the accident to protect Kirti. My Āī-Bābā and Pallavi grieved for me needlessly, and so did Kākā, Manasi, Nikhil, and Amruta, and my Ājī, Māmā, and Māmī. No one spared a thought for them. But you, Farhad, you're making every effort. You brought in Dr. Kanika, and you even found out what Dr. Janaki did with the bribe money. I don't know how to thank you."
You had the right idea with that kiss, Farhad thought, but when will you and I know how to say thank you without words, Mandar Raja? When can Pallavi Bhābhī know about us, and when will you be free to make my dream from last night a reality? Yā Allāh, please help me to focus on driving. Aloud, Farhad said, "I want to do everything that will put an end to your Kākū's plots against your family. So, of course I had Dr. Janaki investigated, as soon as Raghav Anna told me about her yesterday. What she told us just now about Pushkar Online Casino kidnapping her sister matches what Nikhil told us yesterday about his online gambling creditors kidnapping Pallavi jī. These are dangerous people, and they shouldn't be allowed to operate on Raghav Anna's territory."
Mandar looked at Farhad with alarm. Kidnappers shouldn't be allowed, of course, but he didn't want Farhad to go after them illegally and become a target himself.
Farhad mentally kicked himself. What had come over him? Could he not hide his work from Mandar? "You know, Mandar Raja," he changed the subject, "now that we know about Vipul Kadam's role in your disappearance, we should try to get his statement as a witness against your Kākū."
"Sulochana Kākū told Dr. Janaki that the watchman was her spy. She probably paid him for the news about my accident, and maybe even for his silence. How will we convince him to turn against her?" Mandar wondered.
Farhad had an idea. "Pallavi jī has met Mr. Kadam, and she is your Kākū's target just as much as you are. Do you think it's time to tell Pallavi jī about your investigation?"
"Yes, I'll talk to her tomorrow."
"Good. Mandar Raja, tell me one thing. How did you end up with the name Rajiv Dev, the same name that Raghav Anna gave you? Did you hear your name from Dr. Janaki, or from Sulochana Kākū?"
"No, I have no memory of Dr. Janaki. I don't know if it was the brain injury or the medication, but my new memories began with waking up in the taxi, entering Vikarabad. Sulochana Kākū told Amma that she didn't know my name, and of course, her own name was fake. Amma found a paper bracelet on my wrist, which had the name Rajiv Dev in Telugu script."
"The bracelet would have been printed with the name of the hospital too!" Farhad guessed. "Couldn't Dr. Ramya tell that you had been a patient at S. K. Venkatesh Criticare?"
"Someone had used a marker to black out the hospital's name. Probably Sulochana Kākū did that to prevent me from finding my way to Hyderabad. I don't know why she changed my name to Parijat Padhye at the hospital, but left it as Rajiv Dev for Amma to find."
"That is strange. She chose a name by which Raghav Anna could have recognized you, or Dr. Janaki, or any other hospital staff who used that name for you. Maybe she expected Raghav Anna to report the accident to police, and just in case they found you in spite of the fake names and address at the hospital, the name Rajiv Dev would suggest that your disappearance was Anna's idea. Anyway, Mandar Raja, we've reached your house. I'll make sure that Pallavi jī has a peaceful night, and tomorrow you can talk to her and decide what to do about Sulochana Kākū."
"Good night, Farhad. Thank you for everything you did for me today."
"Good night, Mandar Raja."
Mandar stood at the door, watching as Farhad drove off, and then he went inside. The first person that he saw was Amruta.
"Dādā!" Amruta gasped as Mandar pulled her into a hug, tears welling in his eyes. "Kāya zhāle āhe tulā?" What's happened to you?
"Āza sakāḷī Nikhil-ne malā sāṅgitale kī tujhyāvara eka avaghaḍa prasaṅga ālā hotā." This morning, Nikhil told me that you had a difficult situation.
"Ho, Dādā, paṇa mī tyātūna svataḥlā sāṃvarale āhe." Yes, Dādā, but I've recovered from it.
"Āpaṇa jevaṇa zhālyāvara bolūyā." Let's talk after dinner.
They had dinner with the whole family. It was not a pleasant gathering, although Mandar let it be seen that he was enjoying the meal, with Amruta, Nikhil, and Manasi trying to follow his lead. Sulochana was sharing her negative opinion of each and every tabloid that had reported on the video of Pallavi and Raghav. She was furious, of course, because nobody wanted her remarks about Pallavi's character to reach the public. All of the reports were sympathetic to Pallavi, and if Sulochana was mentioned at all, it was invariably as a merciless oppressor of the indomitable widow. Sharada was worried about Pallavi, although they had spoken by video call and Pallavi had assured her that she was managing. Manasi, who had joined the call to try to cheer up her best friend, was giving Sulochana the silent treatment. Vijay and Milind were looking at Mandar as they ate, relieved to find him at home again tonight, and counting on him to uplift Pallavi.
When dinner was finally over, Mandar and Manasi went with Amruta to her room.
"Sāṅga malā, Amruta, kuṇāmuḷe tulā hā nirṇaya ghyāvā lāgalā?" Tell me, Amruta, due to whom did you have to take this decision? Mandar wanted to know the name of the boy responsible for Amruta's aborted pregnancy.
"Mājhyāmuḷeça, Dādā." Due to myself only, Dādā. "Mīça çukā karata gele." I myself went on making mistakes. "Gammata mhaṇūna mī Valentine's Day-cyā party-sāṭhī gele, āṇi tithalī vegavegaḷī cocktails pīta rāhile." For fun, I went to a Valentine's Day party, and there I kept on drinking a variety of cocktails. "Dādā, tulā Yogesh Shrimalla āṭhavato kā?" Dādā, do you remember Yogesh Shrimalla? "Lahānapaṇāpāsūna to māzhā mitra āhe." Ever since we were little, he has been my friend. "Āmacyāta maitrīśivāya kasalehī nāte ghaḍela asā vicāra āmhī kadhīça kelā navhatā." We never thought that we would forge any relation other than friendship. "Mī Raghav Rao-śī lagna karaṇyācī svapne pahāta hote, tyācyā chāyācitrāṃvara pratisāda ṭākata hote, he sagaḷe mī Yogesh-lā sāṅgata ase." I daydreamed about marrying Raghav Rao, I used to comment on his photographs, and I would tell Yogesh all about it. "Paṇa pyālelyā avastheta malā vāṭale kī Raghav-lā itakyā maitriṇīṃçā anubhava āhe, āṇi malā āzavara kāhīça anubhava nāhī ... to kuṭhalyātarī Apsarebarobara Valentine's Day sāzarā karata asela, āṇi mī ithe ekaṭī kā tyācī vāṭa pāhū?" But when I was drunk, I felt that Raghav has experience with so many girlfriends, and upto today I have no experience at all ... he'll be celebrating Valentine's Day with some Apsarā, and why should I be here alone, waiting for him? "Mhaṇūna mī Yogesh-lā zavaḷa kele, āṇi ekadāçā to anubhava ghetalā." That's why I got closer to Yogesh, and finally had that experience. "Tyānantara mī Yogesh-kaḍe baghitale suddhā nāhī, tyācyā bhāvanāṃçā vicāraça kelā nāhī." Afterwards, I didn't even look at Yogesh; I didn't even think about his feelings.
Listening to Amruta's fantasies about Raghav's lifestyle, Mandar reflected on how differently Farhad had described Raghav's behaviour with women, and how Raghav had panicked at the idea of giving Pallavi an HIV scare. Raghav had sounded so vulnerable as he spoke of grown-up little girls like Amruta and his own feelings for Pallavi. And yet, it was Raghav's image that had misled Amruta to get drunk and take risks.
"Puḍhe tulā kase kaḷale kī tulā divasa gele hote?" Later, how did you find out that you were pregnant? Mandar asked. "Yogesh-lā te kadhī māhīta hote kā?" Did Yogesh ever know?
Amruta remembered it well. "Yogāyogāne mājhī āṇi Raghav-cī oḷakha zhālī, āṇi Manasi Tāīçā sākharapuḍā hotā tyā divaśī acānaka to gharī ālā." Coincidentally, I and Raghav met, and on the day of Manasi Tāī's engagement, he came to our house unexpectedly. "Raghav-barobara nāçatānā malā vāṭale kī mī haveta taraṅgateya kī kāya?" Dancing with Raghav, I felt, am I floating on air or what? "Maga malā cakkara ālī, āṇi mī ithe mājhyā kholīta yeūna paḍale." Then I felt dizzy, and I came here to my room to lie down. "Dusaryā divaśī sakāḷī malā ulaṭī ālī, āṇi malā vicitra vāṭale kī sahā āṭhavaḍyāṃta mājhī pāḷī ālī navhatī." The next day, I threw up in the morning, and I felt it was strange that for six weeks I hadn't had my period. "Mhaṇūna mī Mom-cyā oḷakhīcyā Dr. Kanika-āṃkaḍe gele, āṇi tyāṃnī malā tapāsūna malā divasa gelyāçe sāṅgitale." So I went to Dr. Kanika, whom Mom knows, and she examined me and told me I was pregnant. "Malā kāya karāve te suçenā." I couldn't think of what to do. "Mājhyā poṭāta Yogesh-çe bāḷa vāḍhata āhe, he mājhyā manālā paṭataça navhate." Yogesh's baby is growing in my belly - my mind just couldn't accept it. "Tyāpekṣā mājhyā manāta asā vicāra yeta rāhilā kī kāla malā Raghav bheṭalā hotā, paṇa tyāçe lakṣa hote phakta Pallavi-kaḍe, āṇi māzhe poṭa vara ālyāvara māzhe Raghav-śī lagna karaṇe kadhīça śakya hoṇāra nāhī." Instead, I kept thinking that yesterday I met Raghav, but only Pallavi had his attention, and when my belly grows, my marrying Raghav will never ever be possible. "Mī gharī āle āṇi Mom-lā bāzūlā gheūna tilā sagaḷī goṣṭa sāṅgitalī." I came home and took Mom aside to tell her the whole story. "Āṇi Mom malā mhaṇālī kī tū kuṇālāhī na kaḷū detā, Yogesh-lā nāhī āṇi Dad-lā suddhā nāhī, garbhapāta karūna ghe." And Mom said to me, without letting anyone find out, not Yogesh and not even Dad, get an abortion.
Mandar knew that his next questions would hurt Amruta, but he had to ask. "Garbhapātāçā āropa Pallavi-vara karāyaçe tumacyāta kase ṭharale?" How did you two decide to accuse Pallavi of abortion? "Āṇi tase ṭharavatānā, Kākūne asā ekadā tarī vicāra kelā kā kī gharacyā sunecyā cāritrāvara phekalelā cikhala gharacyā mulīṃnāhī cikaṭato? And while planning it, did Kākū even once think that the mud thrown on the family's daughter-in-law's character will stick to the family's daughters too?
"Mīça Mom-lā aikavata hote kī mājhyā naśībāta Raghav asāyalā havā hotā, tara to Pallavi-kaḍe kaśālā vaḷatoya?" I myself was venting to Mom that Raghav should be destined for me, so how come he is turning to Pallavi? "Raghav gharāta yetāyetā ghasarūna Pallavi-varaça kā ādaḷalā, āṇi Tāī āṇi Rahul rāvāṃvara udhaḷāyalā ṭhevalelyā phulāṃçā varṣāva Raghav āṇi Pallavi-varaça kā paḍalā?" When Raghav slipped just as he entered the house, why did he bump into Pallavi only, and why did the rain of flowers kept for sprinkling on Tāī and Rahul rāva fall on Raghav and Pallavi only? "Raghav-ne mājhyā nāhī, Pallavi-cyā kesāṃçā vāsa kā ghetalā, āṇi to Pallavi-cyā kholīta kā śiralā?" Why did Raghav smell Pallavi's hair, not mine, and why did he enter Pallavi's room?
Mandar had to interrupt here. "Amruta, yāpuḍhe tū Pallavi-baddala bolatānā ādarāneça bolaśīla, samazalaṃ?" Amruta, when you talk about Pallavi from now on, you will only talk respectfully, understand? "Tī mājhī patnī āhe, āṇi tujhyāhūna vayāne moṭhī āhe, tyāmuḷe tū tiçā ullekha karatānā phakta Pallavi Vahinī asā karāyaçā." She is my wife, and older than you, so you are to refer to her only as Pallavi Vahinī. "Raghav-ne Pallavi-çā chaḷa kelā hotā ase āza sagaḷyāṃnā māhīta zhāle āhe, to sabhyatā soḍūna kasāhī vāgata asela, paṇa Pallavi-lā doṣa lāgela ase kāhī bolalīsa tara gāṭha mājhyāśī āhe." Raghav was harassing Pallavi - everyone got to know about it today, and he might abandon decency to behave any which way, but if you say anything that would blame Pallavi, you'll have to tangle with me.
Manasi agreed. "Āzacī tī bātamī aikalyāvara Raghav-çā svīkāra karaṇyācī Pallu-cī - sorry, Pallavi Vahinīcī - kāhīça icchā navhatī, he satya kuṇālāhī mānāve lāgela." After hearing that news today, anybody at all would have to admit the truth that Pallu - sorry, Pallavi Vahinī - had no desire at all to accept Raghav. "Amruta, ātā tarī ticyā viṣayī tuzhe gairasamaza soḑa!" Amruta, at least now give up your misunderstandings about her!
"Sorry, Dādā," Amruta said. "Ātā mājhyā manāta Pallavi Vahinībaddala kāhīça dveṣa nāhī." I don't hate Pallavi Vahinī at all anymore. "Āṇi Raghav-sāṭhī vāṭata hote tevaḍhe ākarṣaṇa suddhā agadī virūna gele āhe." And whatever attraction I felt for Raghav has also totally faded away. "Malā evaḍheça mhaṇāyaçe hote kī tevhāṃ malā Raghav-varūna Pallavi Vahinīçā matsara vāṭata hotā, āṇi Mom-lā mī tase sāṅgitale." I only wanted to say this much: at that time, I felt jealous of Pallavi Vahinī over Raghav, and I told Mom about it. "Jyā divaśī malā divasa gelyācī bātamī malā kaḷalī, tyāça divaśī Asha Aunty-īṃçā jīva vāçavalyāmuḷe Pallavi Vahinīçe kautuka hota hote." The day I learned that I was pregnant, that same day Pallavi Vahinī was being adored because she had saved Asha Aunty's life. "Mom-lā te sahana hoīnā." Mom couldn't bear that. "Tyānantaracyā divaśī, Tāīçā haḷadīçā samārambha hotā, tyāta mī Raghav-lā haḷada lāvāyalā gele, āṇi tyāne mājhyākaḍe na baghatāça bhikārīṇa samazūna paise kāḍhale!" The next day at Tāī's haḷada ceremony, I went to put haḷada on Raghav, and without even looking at me, he mistook me for a beggar and handed out money! "Tarī malā vāṭale kī āza māzhā hāta Raghav-cyā chātīlā lāgalā, udyā sakāḷī Tāīcyā mendīcyā samārambhāta mī tyācyā nāṃvāçe ādyākṣara hātāvara korūna gheīna, āṇi udyā dupārī garbhapāta kelyāvara mī azūnahī tyālā lagnāsāṭhī paṭavū śakate." Yet I felt that today my hand touched Raghav's chest, tomorrow morning at Tāī's mendī ceremony, I'll get his name's initial drawn on my hand, and after the abortion tomorrow afternoon, I can still convince him to marry me. "Yogāyogāne mendīçā samārambha hotāhotāça Pallavi Vahinīlā poṭātalyā trāsāmuḷe cakkara ālī, āṇi Nikhil Dādāne tilā rugṇālayāta nele." Coincidentally, right after the mendī ceremony, Pallavi Vahinī fainted due to a stomach infection, and Nikhil Dādā took her to the hospital. "Tevhāṃ Mom-lā kalpanā suçalī kī Dr. Kanika-āṃnī māzhe atiśruti pratimālekhana kelyāvara āṇi malā garbhapātācī pahilī goḷī dilyāvara Pallavi Vahinīlā tapāsāve." Then Mom had the idea that after Dr. Kanika did my ultrasonogram and gave me the first pill for abortion, she should examine Pallavi Vahinī. "Mom-ne garbhapātācyā ciṭṭhīvaraçe Amruta he nāṃva kāḷī regha mārūna khoḍūna ṭākale, āṇi Dr. Kanika-āṃnā Pallavi Vahinīçe nāṃva ghyāyalā sāṅgitale." On the abortion receipt, Mom used a black marker to blot out the name Amruta, and told Dr. Kanika to name Pallavi Vahinī.
Does Kākū think that a black marker is all it takes to cover her tracks? Mandar thought with a sigh.
"Dādā, malā māhīta hote kī Mom Pallavi Vahinīvara anyāya karata hotī, paṇa Mom-ne malā paṭavale kī ase kelyāne Raghav-śī lagna karaṇyāçā māzhā mārga mokaḷā hoīla." Dādā, I knew that Mom was doing injustice to Pallavi Vahinī, but Mom convinced me that doing it would give me a clear path to marrying Raghav. "Paṇa tyācyā ulaṭaça ghaḍale; Mom-ne Pallavi Vahinīśī Raghav-çe nāṃva zoḍale, Raghav-ne Dr. Kanika-āṃkaḍūna sagaḷī māhitī kāḍhalī, āṇi tyāñcyā office-āta garbhapātācī nonda ṭhevalī āhe ase sāṅgūna malā phasavale." But just the opposite happened; Mom linked Raghav's name to Pallavi Vahinī, Raghav got Dr. Kanika to spill all the details, and he told me that the abortion record was kept in her office - to trick me. "Mī to kāgada peṭavata hote toṃvara Farhad-ne sagaḷyāṃnā tamāśā baghāyalā bolāvale hote:" While I was setting fire to that paper, Farhad had invited everyone to watch the spectacle: "Kākā-Kākū āṇi Āī-Bābā, Pallavi Vahinī āṇi Krishna, Rahul rāva āṇi Asha Aunty. Sagaḷyāṃsamora Raghav-ne māzhe āṇi Mom-çe bhiṅga phoḍale, āṇi tyāmuḷe Tāīçe lagna ādalyā rātrīça moḍale." In front of everyone, Raghav exposed my and Mom's secret, and that's why Tāī's wedding got cancelled just the night before.
"Farhad-ne tujhyā garbhapātāçe āṇi Kākūcyā kārasthānāçe satya kaḷavāyalā āpalyā hoṇāryā vyāhyāṃnā bolāvale hote?" Farhad had called our in-laws-to-be to inform them of the truth of your abortion and Kākū's conspiracy? Mandar asked. Nikhil had said that Raghav came to the house to announce Amruta's abortion, and the in-laws-to-be were there. He hadn't mentioned that Farhad had helped Raghav to set a trap for Amruta and embarrass Manasi on purpose.
"Ho, Dādā, Farhad kāhī Raghav-pāsūna vegaḷā nāhī." Yes, Dādā, Farhad isn't exactly different from Raghav, Amruta replied.
Manasi spoke up too. "Jevhāṃ Raghav-ne Pallavi-barobara anaitika saṃbandha asalyāçe nāṭaka kele, tevhāṃ suddhā Farhad tyācyā hākevara hazara hotā." When Raghav made a scene of having indecent relations with Pallavi, even then Farhad showed up when summoned. "Zarī āza Farhad 'Bhābhī' mhaṇata ticyā māge phirato, tarī to Raghav-cyā śabdābāhera nāhī." Even if Farhad today follows her around saying 'Bhābhī,' he still won't transgress Raghav's orders. "Dādā, tū sāvadha rahā, Farhad kasalyā khabarī puravatoya āṇi Raghav-cyā manāta koṇatā pātāḷayantrī hallā āhe, yācī tujhyāsārakhyā saraḷasādhyā māṇasālā kalpanā karaṇaṃ śakya nāhī." Dādā, you stay alert, a straightforward person like you can't imagine what sort of details Farhad reports and which underhanded attack Raghav has in mind.
"Tyā doghāṃmuḷe Asha Aunty-īṃnā garbhapāta āṇi kārasthāna donhī māhīta zhāle, āṇi tyānantara kuṇākaḍūna kuṇākaḍe bātamī pasarata gelī tyāçā pattāça nāhī." Thanks to the two of them, Asha Aunty found out about both the abortion and the conspiracy, and after that we just lost track of how the news spread from whom to whom, Amruta continued. "Yogesh-ne svataḥ malā phone karūna vicārale kī he mājhyāmuḷe ghaḍale nā?" Yogesh called me himself to ask, this happened because of me, right? "Kuṇālāhī tyāçe nāṃva māhīta navhate, tyālā lapūna rāhatā ālaṃ asataṃ, paṇa jithe jithe loka mājhyābaddala bolata hote, tithe tithe Yogesh mājhyā bāzūne ṭhāmapaṇe ubhā rāhilā." No one knew his name, he could have stayed hidden, but wherever people were talking about me, there Yogesh stood up, taking my side steadfastly. "Mī vicāra kelā kī college soḍūna mī Yogesh-çā hāta dharūna kuṭhetarī zāve jithe kuṇālāhī hā prasaṅga ghaḍalyāçe māhīta nasela." I had the idea that I would leave college and run away with Yogesh to somewhere that no one would know that this incident had happened. "Paṇa Mom-ne malā vacana dile kī azūnahī māzhe śrīmantāśīça lagna hoīla." But Mom promised me that even now I will marry only a rich man. "Punhā tine kārasthāna kele, Kirti-vara cikhalapheka karūna tī Pallavi Vahinīne kelī ase Raghav-lā paṭavale, paṇa Raghav-lā kaḷale kī Photogram-varacī sāḍī nesatānācī Kirti-cī chāyācitre Mom-cyā phone-ne kāḍhalī hotī." Again she conspired, threw mud at Kirti and convinced Raghav that Pallavi Vahinī did it, but Raghav learned that the photographs on Photogram of Kirti changing her saree were taken by Mom's phone. "Tyāne māzhe toṇḍa phoḍūna ṭākāyacī dhamakī dilī, āṇi malā sagaḷe kabūla karāyalā āṇi tyāçe pāya dharūna māphī māgāyalā bhāga pāḍale." He threatened to break open my face and forced me to admit everything and clutch his feet to beg pardon.
Raghav had threatened to beat Amruta! Mandar felt his blood running hot. He had apologized to Raghav today because Amruta had helped Sulochana Kākū to slander him, but this, making his baby sister afraid, the way Pallavi had feared for her life - Raghav had no right! Then Mandar realized that Raghav must have felt this way about what Kākū had done to Kirti. Mandar needed to do better than Raghav; he had to control his fury and reassure Amruta right now. What was it that Amma said in group therapy sessions?
"Amruta, je ghaḍūna gele te badalatā yeta nāhī, paṇa yāpuḍhe akkhyā āyuṣyāta tū je kāhī karaśīla tyāvarūna tujhī oḷakha hoīla." Amruta, what has already happened can't be changed, but you'll be recognized by whatever you do in your whole life hereafter. "Śrīmanta navarā śodhaṇyāpekṣā tū svataḥ kuṭhalātarī vyavasāya surū kara āṇi tyācī bharabharāṭa zhālyāvara ekhādyā samazūtadāra navaryālā śrīmanta kara." Instead of looking for a rich husband, you yourself can start some enterprise, and when it is flourishing, find an understanding husband and make him rich. "Ugāça mulagā śrīmanta āhe mhaṇūna tyācyā durguṇāṃkaḍe durlakṣa karū nakosa." Just because a boy is rich, don't ignore his vices. "Raghav-sārakhyā çukīcyā mārgāne çālaṇāryā māṇasākaḍe āpaṇa baghūça naye." We shouldn't even look at someone like Raghav who is walking along the wrong path.
"Dādā, malā kaḷataṃ kī yāpuḍhe māzhe akkhe āyuṣya āhe, paṇa dararoza kuṇītarī mī vicitra asalyāsārakhe mājhyākaḍe baghūna malā āṭhavaṇa karataṃ kī mī ase kāhītarī kele āhe jyāmuḷe mulīṃnā beabrūcī janmaṭhepa bhogāvī lāgate." Dādā, I understand that I have my whole life ahead, but every day someone looks at me as if I'm weird and reminds me that I've done something for which girls get a life sentence of embarrassment. "Lokāṃçe vicāra azūna itake māgāsalele kase asū śakatāta?" How can people's thinking still be so regressive? "Asale loka malā Uṣā āṇi Aniruddhācyā goṣṭīta śiralyāsārakhe vāṭāyalā lāvatāta!" These people make me feel as if I've slipped into the story of Uṣā and Aniruddha!
"Mhaṇaje kāya?" What does that mean? Mandar asked. "Tū kevhāṃpāsūna Purāṇāṃtalī vānagī sāṅgaṇārī kīrtanakāra zhālīsa?" Since when are you a kīrtana-preacher citing evidence from the Purāṇas?
"Are Dādā, Yogesh-lā lahānapaṇāpāsūna zunyā kathāṃcī pustake vāçāyacī āvaḍa āhe, āṇi to he sagaḷaṃ Amruta-cyā kānāṃta bharato!" Oh Dādā, ever since he was little, Yogesh likes to read books of old stories, and he fills Amruta's ears with all of this! Manasi laughed. "Sāṅga, Amruta, tyā katheta māgāsalele ase tulā kāya khaṭakale?" Tell us, Amruta, what struck you as regressive in that story?
"Ho, sāṅgate." Yes, I'll tell you. "Uṣelā ticyā iccheviruddha Aniruddhāne ticyāvara lādalelyā pahilyā anubhavāçe phakta vāīṭa svapna paḍale, tarī tine svataḥlā apavitra mānāyaçe, saṃpūrṇa Daityakūḷa buḍavilyāçā doṣa svataḥvara ghyāyaçā, āṇi marūna zāyacī bhāṣā karāyacī, tyāśivāya tī Aniruddhālā yogya aśī śuddha manācī kumārikā ṭharaṇāra kaśī!" Uṣā only had a bad dream of a first experience imposed on her by Aniruddha against her wish, and yet she had to consider herself defiled, blame herself for ruining the entire Daitya clan, and talk about wanting to die - without that, she wouldn't be convincing as a pure-minded virgin worthy of Aniruddha! "Aniruddhālā mātra ādhīça aneka striyāṃçā anubhava hotā, tyā anekazaṇīñcyā madhye to dārū pīta ramalā hotā, tarī ekā kumārikeśī lagna karaṇyācyā tyācyā yogyateviṣayī kuṇīça śaṅkā kāḍhalī nāhī!" Whereas Aniruddha already had experience with several women, he was enjoying himself drinking wine amidst several women, and yet no one raised a doubt about his worthiness to marry a virgin! "Ulaṭa, Uṣecyā tathākathita sakhīne raḍaṇāryā, taḍaphaḍaṇāryā Uṣeçā svapnāta upabhoga gheṇe hā Aniruddhāçā śabdaśaḥ vikrama mānalā!" On the contrary, Uṣā's so-called friend considered Aniruddha's exploitation of crying, writhing Uṣā in a dream to be literal valour! "He māgāsalele vicāra nāhīta tara kāya mhaṇāyaçe?" If these aren't regressive ideas, then what should we call them? "Mī mānya karate kī mī ekadā çūka kelī, paṇa Raghav-sārakhyā puruṣāṃnī kāya kamī veḷā vāsanā sādhalī āhe?" I admit that I once made a mistake, but have men like Raghav not enough times achieved their lust? "Tarīhī college-madhale mulage mhaṇatāta kī mājhyāsārakhyā mulīçā bharavasā nāhī, malā thoḍī pāzalī kī mī kuṇālāhī saṃdhī deīna ... āṇi āza Pallavi Vahinīne Raghav-lā soḍalyācī bātamī kaḷalyāvara mulīṃçe ekamata hote kī Raghav-çā punarvivāha vhāyalā havā." Still, the boys in college say that a girl like me can't be trusted, give me a little to drink and I'll give anyone an opportunity ... and today when the girls heard the news that Pallavi Vahinī has left Raghav, they were unanimous that Raghav should remarry.
"Tyāṃçe soḍūna de, Amruta." Forget them, Amruta, Mandar tried to comfort her. "Jyāṃçe vicāra itake ghāṇeraḍe āheta, tyāñcī āpalyā āyuṣyāçā mārga ṭharavaṇyācī lāyakīça nāhī." Those whose ideas are so abhorrent are unfit to determine our life's course.
"Ho, paṇa Dādā, āpalyā samājāta mulāñcyā āṇi mulīñcyā laiṅgika anubhavāṃbaddala kitī kṛtrima bhedabhāva āheta!" Yes, but Dādā, what artificial discriminatory opinions about boys' and girls' sexual experiences exist in our society! "Ṛśyaśṛṅgācyā kathetūna āpalyālā kaḷāve kī agadī bhoḷyā brahmacārī taruṇāsāṭhī suddhā vāsanā agadī naisargika āhe, āṇi viṣamaliṅgī ākarṣaṇāsāṭhī samaliṅgī bhāṣā vāparalī tarī bhāvaneta kāhī pharaka paḍata nāhī." We should understand from Ṛśyaśṛṅga's story that even for a totally innocent celibate youth, lust is totally natural, and heterosexual attraction can be expressed in homosexual language with no difference in the emotions. "Ṛśyaśṛṅgāçā pahilā anubhava ekā veśyene ghetalā, āṇi tyālā te samaliṅgī ākarṣaṇa vāṭale, tarī tyāçā āṇi Śāntā rājakumārīçā puḍhe sukhāçā saṃsāra zhālā." Ṛśyaśṛṅga's first experience was taken by a prostitute, and he thought of it as homosexual attraction, and still he and the princess Śāntā went on to have a happy married life. "Tara mājhyāsārakhyā ekhādyā mulīne kaumārya soḍale tarī tilā tiçā rājakumāra kā miḷū naye?" Then if a girl like me gives up her virginity, why can't she still get her prince?
"Amruta, tulā suddhā puḍhe çāṅgalā zoḍīdāra miḷela, malā tyācī khātrī vāṭate." Amruta, you too will get a good partner later, I feel sure of that, Mandar promised, and Manasi smiled to encourage her sister.
They each hugged Amruta, and then Mandar walked with Manasi to her room.
Chapter One on page 1
Chapter Two on page 2
Chapter Three on page 2
Chapter Four on page 3
Chapter Five on page 4
Chapter Six on page 4
Chapter Seven on page 5
Chapter Eight on page 5
Chapter Nine on page 7
Chapter Ten on page 7
Chapter Eleven on page 8
Chapter Twelve on page 8
Chapter Thirteen on page 8
Chapter Fourteen on page 9
Chapter Fifteen on page 10
Chapter Sixteen on page 10
Chapter Seventeen on page 11
Chapter Eighteen on page 11
Chapter Nineteen on page 11
Chapter Twenty on page 11
Chapter Twenty-One on page 11
Chapter Twenty-Two on page 12
Chapter Twenty-Three on page 12
Chapter Twenty-Four on page 12
Chapter Twenty-Five on page 12
Chapter Twenty-Seven on page 14
Chapter Twenty-Eight on page 14
Chapter Twenty-Nine on page 14
Chapter Thirty on page 14
Chapter Thirty-One on page 14
Chapter Thirty-Two on page 14
Chapter Thirty-Three on page 15
Chapter Thirty-Four on page 15
Chapter Thirty-Five on page 15
Chapter Thirty-Six on page 15
Chapter Twenty-Seven
"Ātā malā tū tujhī goṣṭa sāṅgaśīla kā?" Now will you tell me your story? Mandar asked Manasi. "Rahul rāva āṇi tū, tumacyāta nemake kāya ghaḍale?" Rahul rāva and you, what exactly happened between you?
"Ho, Dādā, sāṅgate." Yes, Dādā, I'll tell you. "Tulā Rahul āṭhavato kā?" Do you remember Rahul?
"Tuzhā collega-madhalā mitra, ho, āṭhavato." Your friend from college, yes, I remember him, Mandar replied. "To vādavivādaspardheta bhāga ghyāyaçā, nāṭakāṃsāṭhī lāmbalaçaka bhāṣaṇaṃ pāṭha karāyaçā ... tyāçā rājakāraṇāta śiraṇyāçā vicāra hotā." He used to participate in debating contests, he used to memorize long and complex speeches for theatre ... he planned to enter politics. Realizing the depth of detail of his regained memories, Mandar could not help feeling excited. "Tū tyācī chāyācitre kāḍhāyacīsa." You used to take photographs of him.
"Barobara, Dādā, tyā sahavāsātūna āmacyā maitrīçe premāta rūpāntara zhāle." Correct, Dādā, through that time together, our friendship was transformed into love. "Malā māhīta hote kī tyācyā gharacyāṃnā svataḥcyā Telugu saṃskṛtīçā khūpa abhimāna āhe, te Rahul-sāṭhī Telugu mulagīça śodhāyalā zātīla, āṇi to tyāṃçā māna rākhaṇyāsāṭhī malā māgaṇī ghālaṇāra nāhī." I was aware that his family has a lot of pride in their Telugu culture, they'll only go looking for a Telugu girl for Rahul, and out of respect for them, he won't propose to me. "Mhaṇūna mī Āī-Bābāṃnā sāṅgitale, āṇi te Rahul-cyā ātyā, Rama Atta, yāñcyāśī bolale." So I told Āī-Bābā, and they spoke to Rahul's paternal aunt, Rama Atta. "Rama Atta yāṃnī Rahul-lā vicārale āṇi tyāçā hokāra miḷavalā mhaṇūna Asha Aunty lagnālā tayāra zhālyā." Rama Atta asked Rahul and got his assent, that's why Asha Aunty agreed to the marriage. "Lagna ṭharalyāvara Rahul-cyā vāgaṇyāta zo mokaḷepaṇā ālā, Dādā, tyāmuḷe mī adhikaça tyācyā premāta paḍale." After we got engaged, the way Rahul's behaviour became liberated, Dādā, it made me fall in love with him even more.
Mandar thought of holding Pallavi in his arms earlier today. He felt protective of her, proud of her, aware of her feelings ... but liberated ... he thought of showing pride in Farhad with a kiss and scolding him for not taking his safety seriously.
"Tulā samazūna gheta hotā kā to?" Did he understand your feelings? Mandar asked Manasi.
"Āścarya vāṭāve itakā samazūtadāra āhe Rahul." You'd be amazed by how understanding Rahul is, Manasi replied. "Lagnācyā pandiri guñja vidhisāṭhī Nikhil-lā Āīne khaḍḍā sahā phūṭa khola khaṇāyaçā ase sāṅgitale, āṇi tyāne phakta cāra phūṭa khola asā khaṇalā." For the wedding canopy setup ritual, Āī told Nikhil to dig a pit six feet deep, and he dug it only four feet deep. "Maga tyā khaḍḍyāta ubhāralelā khāmba vādaḷavāryāta halū lāgalā āṇi to Asha Aunty-īñcyā ḍokyāvara paḍata hotā, tevaḍhyāta Pallu-ne to jhelalā āṇi tyāṃçā jīva vāçavalā." Then the pole set upright in that pit began to move in a windstorm, and it was falling on Asha Aunty's head when Pallu caught it and saved her life. "Koṇatyā śabdāṃta mī tyāñcī māphī māgū, heça malā kaḷenā." With what words to apologize to her, I just didn't know. "Paṇa Rahul malā mhaṇālā kī hyā vidhīcyā nimittāne śevaṭī Asha Aunty-īṃnā paṭale kī Pallavi-lā vidhavā mhaṇūna vegaḷe vāgavaṇyāta kāhī artha nāhī." But Rahul said to me that thanks to this ritual, finally Asha Aunty was convinced that treating Pallavi differently as a widow makes no sense.
"Pallavi-çā vidhavā mhaṇūna khūpa loka apamāna karata hote kā?" Were many people disrespecting Pallavi as a widow?
"Adhūnamadhūna kuṇītarī bolāyaçe, paṇa Kākū nehamī āpalī mulagī aśī Pallu-cī oḷakha karāyacī." Occasionally someone would say something, but Kākū always introduced Pallu as her daughter. "Āṇi tyā dṛśyāta Raghav zasā bolalā tasā samoraçā kuṇīhī bolela kī Pallavi kāhī vidhavā nāhī, tī tara Deshmukh-āñcī mulagī nāhī kā?" And the way Raghav spoke in that video, anyone else would argue that Pallavi is no widow, isn't she the Deshmukhs' daughter? "Kākūne Pallu-çe dusare lagna ṭharavāyaçā prayatna suddhā kelā." Kākū even made an effort to arrange a second marriage for Pallu. "Bāppācyā kṛpene tase kāhī ghaḍale nāhī, āṇi Raghav-śī kharyā arthāne Pallu-çā punarvivāha ghaḍalā nāhī." It's Bāppā's mercy that nothing like that happened, and Pallu didn't get remarried to Raghav in a real sense.
Āī had tried to get Pallavi remarried! Mandar recalled Farhad's words: "Pallavi jī doesn't have to be married to you to be part of your family." Was it possible that Pallavi could remain a Deshmukh even if Mandar could not?
"Lagna moḍalyānantara tuzhe Rahul rāvāṃśī kāhī bolaṇe zhāle kā?" After the wedding was called off, did you ever talk to Rahul rāva? Mandar asked.
"Moḍalelyā lagnācyā divaśī mī tyālā phone lāvalā to Asha Aunty-īṃnī uçalalā, āṇi tyā mhaṇālyā kī mī svataḥ lagna moḍalyāvara tyāñcyākaḍūna kāhīça apekṣā ṭhevū naye, Rahul-lā mājhyāśī bolāyaçe nāhī." On the day of the cancelled wedding, I called him but Asha Aunty picked up, and she said that after calling off the wedding myself, I shouldn't expect anything from them, and Rahul didn't want to talk to me.
"Tū svataḥ lagna moḍalaṃsa, asaṃ tyā mhaṇālyā?" You called off the wedding yourself, that's what she said?
"Ho, Dādā, kāraṇa Asha Aunty-īñcyā āśīrvādāśivāya mī āṇi Rahul kasalā sukhāçā saṃsāra karaṇāra hoto?" Yes, Dādā, because what kind of happy married life could I and Rahul have had without Asha Aunty's blessing? "Jyā kṣaṇī tyāṃnā kaḷale kī gharātalyā kuṇītarī garbhapāta kelyāçe Raghav bolata suṭalā āhe, tyā kṣaṇāpāsūna tyāṃçā lagnālā virodha hotā." The moment she learned that Raghav had started talking about someone in the family aborting a pregnancy, from that moment she was opposed to the marriage. "Raghav-lā pratyeka samārambhāta bolāvūna Āīlā kāhī nā kāhī tamāśā kelyāśivāya rahāvenā." Āī had invited Raghav to every ceremony, and couldn't resist making some sort of spectacle every time. "Amruta-ne Raghav-cyā shirt-lā lāvalelī uṣṭī haḷada Āīne Pallu-cyā hātālā lāvalī." After Amruta put haḷada on Raghav's shirt, Āī put the leftovers on Pallu's hand. "Dusaryā divaśī Raghav-cyā managaṭāvaracyā mendīta paḍalelyā sākhaḷīne Pallu-cyā taḷahātāvara chāpalelī ādyākṣare pāhūna Āī bolata suṭalī." The next day, seeing that the chain from Raghav's wrist had fallen into mendī and printed his initials on Pallu's palm, Āī started talking. "Maga saṃgīta kāryakramātūna Pallu kāmāsāṭhī nighālī asatānā Āīne sagaḷyāṃnā sāṅgitale kī tī Raghav-lā bheṭāyalā gelī." Then when Pallu had left the saṃgīta program for work, Āī told everyone that she went to meet Raghav. "Āṇi Gaurī pūjecyā divaśī āpalyā dukānāvara bāyakāṃçā morcā ālā, bhara bāzārāta Pallu-ne garbhapāta kelyācī ghoṣaṇā karāyalā, to Āīśivāya āṇakhī kuṇī pāṭhavalā asaṇāra?" And on the Gaurī pūjā day a mob of women came to our shop to announce in the crowded market that Pallu had an abortion - who other than Āī would have sent them? "Asha Aunty-īṃnā kadācit mulāsāṭhī garbhapāta kelelī mehuṇī çālalī asatī, paṇa dararoza nave kārasthāna karaṇārī vihīṇa kaśī çālela?" Maybe Asha Aunty would have accepted for her son a sister-in-law who had an abortion, but how could she accept a co-mother-in-law who plans new conspiracies every day?
Mandar held out his arms, and Manasi gratefully accepted the hug.
"Tū pūrṇapaṇe vicāra karūna, ghara tuṭū naye mhaṇūna, khūpa dhīrāne eka avaghaḍa nirṇaya ghetalāsa, Manasi." You thought carefully, and to avoid a rift in the family, you took a difficult decision with a lot of courage, Manasi, Mandar said, feeling guilty that his own behaviour with Farhad was so thoughtless and spontaneous. "Rahul rāvāṃnī mātra kāhītarī mārga śodhāyaçā prayatna karāyalā havā hotā." On the other hand, Rahul rāva should have made an effort to find some way out.
"Asha Aunty malā Rahul-barobara bolū deta navhatyā mhaṇūna mī Rama Attaṃkaḍe tyācyāsāṭhī niropa ṭhevalā kī mī Āīśī saṃbandha toḍāyalā tayāra āhe, nāhītara tyāne lagnāsāṭhī itara aṭī sāṅgāvyāta, paṇa asalā abolā malā sahana hota nāhī." Asha Aunty wasn't letting me talk to Rahul, so I left a message for him with Rama Atta that I'm ready to break off relations with Āī, or he can tell me other conditions of our marriage, but I can't bear this silent treatment, Manasi shared, and Mandar patted her back as he used to do when she was a baby, thinking that no matter what Manasi said, it would break her heart to turn against Sulochana Kākū when she found out what Kākū had done to him. "Āṇi Rama Attaṃnī malā uttara dile kī Rahul malā kāhīça doṣa deta nāhī, paṇa gharacyā sagaḷyāṃçā virodha asalyāmuḷe to mājhyāśī kadhīça lagna karaṇāra nāhī." And Rama Atta replied to me that Rahul doesn't blame me at all, but since everyone in his family disapproves, he will never marry me. "Rājakāraṇāta tyālā khūpa kāhī karāyaçe āhe, tyāmuḷe tyālā Āīsārakhī kārasthānī āṇi abrūnukasāna karaṇārī sāsū paravaḍaṇāra nāhī." He wants to accomplish a lot in politics, and so he can't afford a mother-in-law like Āī who conspires and defames. "Mī Āīśī saṃbandha toḍale tarī tiçā bharavasā nāhī." Even if I break off relations with Āī, she can't be trusted. "Rahul-lā tyāçe mājhyāvaraçe prema visarāyaçe āhe mhaṇūna to malā bheṭaṇāra nāhī āṇi mājhyāśī bolaṇāra nāhī, ase Rama Attaṃnī malā sāṅgitale." Rahul wants to forget his love for me, so he won't meet me and won't talk to me, is what Rama Atta told me. "Puḍhe Rahul-çā Saroja nāṃvācyā mulīśī sākharapuḍā zhālyāçe malā Photogram-varūna kaḷale." Later, I learned on Photogram that Rahul and a girl named Saroja held their engagement. "Kāhī āṭhavaḍyāṃpūrvī tyāṃçe lagna hoṇyāādhī Rama Attaṃnī malā tyābaddala kaḷavale, āṇi mī tyāṃnā śubhecchā pāṭhavalyā." Some weeks ago, before their wedding happened, Rama Atta notified me about it, and I sent them my congratulations.
"Śābbāsa, Manasi!" Bravo, Manasi! Mandar grinned, and Manasi gave him a brave smile in return.
"Malā vāṭale kī viṣaya titheça sampalā, paṇa āza Rahul-ne bātamyā pāhilyāvara malā lekhī niropa pāṭhavalā." I thought the matter ended there, but today Rahul saw the news and texted me. "Tyālā vāīṭa vāṭataṃya kī āmaçe lagna moḍalyāvara āmacī maitrī paṇa sampalī." He feels bad that when our wedding was called off, our friendship ended too. "Māzhā Mandar Dādā jīvanta asalyāçe āṇi Raghav-ne mājhī sagaḷyāta zavaḷacī maitrīṇa Pallavi hicyāvara zulūma kelyāçe aikalyāvara Rahul-lā mājhyāśī bheṭūna bolāvese vāṭale." Upon hearing that my Mandar Dādā is alive and Raghav was abusive to my closest friend Pallavi, Rahul felt like meeting me to talk. "Asha Aunty-īṃçā virodha gṛhīta dharūna āmhī ṭharavale kī udyā Rama Attaṃcyā gharī Rahul āṇi Saroja yetīla āṇi mī tithe zāūna tyāṃnā bheṭena." Taking Asha Aunty's disapproval for granted, we decided that tomorrow Rahul and Saroja will visit Rama Atta's house, and I will go there to meet them. "Dādā, tīna mahinyāṃnantara tyālā pāhilyāvara, tyācyā zoḍīlā dusarī mulagī pāhilyāvara, mājhyā manāta kāya bhāvanā zāgyā hotīla, te māhīta nāhī, paṇa āmhī ekāça śaharāta rāhato, tara mī tyācyāpāsūna lapūna rāhū śakata nāhī!" Dādā, seeing him after three months, seeing another girl as his partner, I don't know what emotions will stir in my mind, but we live in the same city, so I can't hide from him!
Mandar told Manasi that he was proud of her for facing Rahul and his wife, and then he left her room for his own. As Mandar was getting ready for bed, so were Pallavi and Farhad's Ammī.
At dinner, Farhad had told his Ammī-Abbū about the video that had made news today. Noticing Pallavi's silence, Gulshan had only said that Pallavi shouldn't worry, the gossip won't last, and Allāh Miyā will bless her with a good life if she does good. Rehana had been outspoken as always, saying that she was proud of Pallavi for promising to expose Raghav Rao's indecency to the world, and now Allāh Miyā had made it happen.
"Pallavi, is Raghav Rao trying to force you to return to him?" Rehana asked, wondering why Pallavi seemed distracted even when it was time to sleep.
"No, Ammī," Pallavi answered automatically, thinking of how Raghav had come running to protect her today. Raghav claimed to accept that she was Mandar's wife, and Raghav wanted to do what he could for her anyway. He was ready to admit his guilt and only asked her to believe that he had repented. Yet Pallavi still felt angry that Raghav had forced her into bigamy and incriminated her with his CCTV. Amma had told her Raghav's secret ... Pallavi held the power to ruin Raghav as he had ruined her ... but she didn't want to be vindictive. Bābā would be disappointed if she exposed anyone's sexual history to gossip. Bābā believed that sex workers deserve compassion and opportunities for self-improvement, not to be held back by their past.
"Well!" Rehana interrupted her thoughts. "Listen, beṭī, if that man doesn't keep his distance, you just tell me and I'll be your shield."
Pallavi said nothing, and only nodded gratefully. She remembered almost kissing Raghav, wearing that dress for him. Only five nights ago, she had wanted to overcome her memories of Raghav's violence and let him come closer. She hadn't questioned that Raghav had experience with other women, that he didn't share her belief in waiting for marriage. There had been no doubt in Pallavi's mind that very first night when Raghav had rear-ended her scootie and drunkenly sneered that girls can't drive, and she had seen a woman standing through the open roof of his car, drinking from a bottle. After that, Raghav's sex scandal hadn't surprised Pallavi. When Raghav had asked for a chance in Mandar's name, and had been willing to wash Bābā's feet and drink the water if it would reunite her with her family, Pallavi had accepted that she was married to Raghav. She couldn't change his misogynistic and criminal past, but he was trying to control his urges for her sake. Padarī paḍalaṃ āṇi pavitra zhālaṃ! What falls in our lap becomes pure for us! She had observed the Vaṭa-Paurṇimā fast for him. Today, hearing from Amma that Raghav hadn't done it all with other women, Pallavi had felt curious. But why should it matter to her anymore? She was Mandar's wife. A few moments later, learning that Raghav had been selling his body years ago, Pallavi had felt cheated, which she had no right to feel! It wasn't her loss if Raghav didn't wait for someone special! She should feel righteous anger, Pallavi told herself as she lay on her side in the dark room, because Amma had thought her prostitute son could give her a good life. As a widow whose name had been smeared, was she worth so little? Prostitute, drunkard, racketeer, profligate, embezzler ... the ugly words made tears spring to her eyes and roll down her cheeks.
"Beṭī, if you want to talk about anything at all, remember that I am a mother, and think of me like Sharada jī." Ammī was trying to help, but Pallavi had heard enough talk today. She just wanted her life to be so ordinary that no one would feel the need to talk about her.
Pallavi remembered the words that Raghav had said to her on the terrace yesterday. "You are innocent on the inside, no matter how much ugliness you see around you. You're the treasure that I aspire to earn in my life." How could those words come from someone whose own practices were so hideous? How dare he expect anything!
Hearing Pallavi's quiet sobs, Rehana patted her shoulder repeatedly to soothe her to sleep. Pallavi lay awake thinking, what Āī taught me from Bhagavad-Gītā is right: paradharmo bhayāvahaḥ, anyone else's dharma will only bring anxiety! I believe in family, purity, honesty, the same values as Mandar. Raghav's dharma is money, revenge, vanity. I shouldn't have thought that we could be married.
Chapter One on page 1
Chapter Two on page 2
Chapter Three on page 2
Chapter Four on page 3
Chapter Five on page 4
Chapter Six on page 4
Chapter Seven on page 5
Chapter Eight on page 5
Chapter Nine on page 7
Chapter Ten on page 7
Chapter Eleven on page 8
Chapter Twelve on page 8
Chapter Thirteen on page 8
Chapter Fourteen on page 9
Chapter Fifteen on page 10
Chapter Sixteen on page 10
Chapter Seventeen on page 11
Chapter Eighteen on page 11
Chapter Nineteen on page 11
Chapter Twenty on page 11
Chapter Twenty-One on page 11
Chapter Twenty-Two on page 12
Chapter Twenty-Three on page 12
Chapter Twenty-Four on page 12
Chapter Twenty-Five on page 12
Chapter Twenty-Six on page 13
Chapter Twenty-Eight on page 14
Chapter Twenty-Nine on page 14
Chapter Thirty on page 14
Chapter Thirty-One on page 14
Chapter Thirty-Two on page 14
Chapter Thirty-Three on page 15
Chapter Thirty-Four on page 15
Chapter Thirty-Five on page 15
Chapter Thirty-Six on page 15
I had to make an edit to Chapter Twenty-Seven: the pole that almost killed Asha is a Telugu wedding ritual after all. So, my idea that Sulochana got the wrong idea from Madhavan and Rahul convinced Asha to play along for Manasi's sake doesn't work.
Before writing this chapter, I had searched for "paṇḍharī guñjā pūjā" - what I heard when Milind said its name on the show - and "bamboo pole" together with "Telugu wedding," and all I could find were videos of the Tamiḻ pantakkāl naṭutal wedding ritual and blogs listing Telugu wedding rituals that didn't mention this at all. I invited twenty members who self-identified as Telugu to correct me if I'm wrong, and no one came forward in a month. Then, as I was watching how Amruta behaved in scenes around the time when she would have discovered her pregnancy, I heard Pallavi say "paṇḍherī guñjā." I went ahead and posted Chapters Twenty-Six and Twenty-Seven yesterday morning so that they wouldn't distract me from some real life commitments. Today I found time to try searching again, and at last I came upon videos of pandiri guñja by Telugu people.
So, I apologize to my readers for my mistake, and I have corrected it.
I have also changed the show's use of Aṇṇā (Tamiḻ, borrowed by Marathi) to Anna (Telugu) everywhere in my story because Farhad on the show was supposedly fluent in Telugu, Jagadish and Krishna are Telugu ... Likewise, I have changed Ammā (Tamiḻ) to Amma (Telugu) and Rahul's aunt who judged the saṃgīta performances is not "Rama Ātyā" (Marathi) but "Rama Atta" (Telugu) in my story.
Please don't hesitate to tell me if anything in my story is factually incorrect.
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