{ A Piece Of My Heart } #2 #PreRishFF [Ch14 -Pg14] - Page 10

Originally posted by: GulaabiAakhein.

HAHAHA Yes, half done 🤣

Originally posted by: Wistfulness

I guessed it right then.

Well, I'm still working out some things. My mind is very fickle.

Originally posted by: ilazyair

Res

Bookmarking since I need to read this 😃

Welcome to the madness 🤗🤪

Guys! As promised will update now ⭐️

Chapter 14: Ego or Self Respect?

Rishabh could feel his heart racing as he stepped back. He had expressed himself and everything that he felt in that kiss. His apology, his regret and his determination to win Prerna back, all of that was packed perfectly in that kiss. He only wished he could listen to her thoughts at his point. He looked at her lowered eyes. He wondered if she had forgiven him, because she did kiss him back, she definitely still had feelings for Rishabh and that alone, gave him a new level of confidence. All was not lost, his love was still there in her heart. He felt happy, after so long, he felt like things would finally move towards the better.

Prerna tried to think. Her brain was blank and she wished she could muster the strength to push back those feelings which had once again cropped up in her heart. The feelings she had pushed so deep down that she forgot it existed and yet, here she was, feeling all those things again. How could she let this happen? She wondered how she could give in so easily? He had lied to her so many times, how could she believe him today? She was scared, insecure and very indecisive at this point. She needed to pull back and revisit her thoughts. She had nothing more to say to him. She turned to leave but he caught her arm.

“No Prerna, aaj main tumhe ese jaane nahi dunga.” he said sternly. Prerna turned back and looked at him perplexed.

“I know you felt it too. Because I did. You love me. You still do. I know it now.” he said confidently.

Prerna had felt it. She knew what he was talking about. She didn’t deny it. Maybe that would give her clarity, she thought. “Yes,” she said, lowering her gaze again, “I do.” she added.

A smile sprang onto Rishabh’s face as he stepped towards her, holding her hand in his. “So that means--”

“No.” she said, knowing he would be disappointed. Her mind said no. She couldn’t.

Rishabh looked at her in disbelief. “What?”

“That doesn’t mean that we can be together. That doesn’t mean that I can trust you. But yes, I do still love you.” her gaze, not leaving the ground. ‘Acceptance’ had finally been reached. She now knew there was no point in hiding the truth, and for the first time in a long time, she acknowledged her feelings. She felt good, more powerful now.

Rishabh stared right back at her. His heart was breaking all over again. “You still don’t believe me.” he mumbled.

“I now know you were saying the truth. But it took Komolika’s verification for me to trust you. What does that say?” she said, meeting his eye again. She was trying to understand all of this herself as well. What did she really want?

Rishabh felt betrayed. He let go of her hand. “I wish I hadn’t come here today.” he said bitterly. He felt his heartbreak get replaced with frustration now. She really couldn’t see how much he had changed?

Prerna could see the hurt in his eyes. She knew how terrible he would be feeling but she couldn’t help it. She needed him to see the truth. He was being delusional thinking things would be fine between them, just like that. Insecurity and Fear were both very strong emotions, both of which Prerna strongly felt. She couldn’t let herself get dissolved in them. It would screw with her brain.

“Why!” he asked. “Why can’t you just forgive me? I have tried everything. I know I made mistakes in the past, but I have changed. I was stupid but now I know better. We can be happy again but you--you’re stuck in the past. You don’t want to believe that I can change!” he roared.

Prerna listened silently. She was expecting an outburst. It was natural.

“Rishabh, I have forgiven you. I know you did all of it for your company and I know you love me.” she said.

Rishabh held her tightly and through gritted teeth asked, “Then why? Why are you doing this to me?”

“Because I can’t destroy myself to be with you. Saying yes to you means going through insecurities, doubts, paranoia and a lot of apprehensions. You lied so many times that now even if I want I don’t believe your words. Even if I want, I can’t trust you with my heart. I will always have to live in fear.” she explained.

Rishabh left her with a jolt. “These are all textbook stuff Prerna!” he argued. “You really believe this?” he asked.

Prerna nodded. “I can’t.” she said stepping back.

Rishabh puckered his lips. He was trying hard to control his anger. She was being so unnecessarily pedantic. He had done everything and enough was enough.

“Okay, then we have nothing more to say to each other.” Rishabh said formally, straightening his suit.

Prerna felt the coldness in his voice. She knew he was upset and probably he was right to be. She had come here expecting help from him, which she now knew was not possible. She would have to handle Komolika herself, afterall she was her patient. She shouldn’t have taken such a hasty step and asked Rishabh to meet like this.

Rishabh expected her to say something but when she didn’t he walked away, just like that, without another word. There really was nothing for them to say to each other.

*

Rishabh reached home and strutted into his room banging his door shut. He stood in front of his mirror, staring at his reflection. “Rishabh Bajaj,” He said his name out loud. That’s who he was. Ego and pride took over him, or was it plain old self respect? 'I have had enough. How many times does she expect me to apologise? It’s been more than a year now! Even then I apologised for weeks.'

He told himself. He recalled the number of days he stood outside her office waiting for her to reach, and the number of times he waited for her to finish with office so he could catch her on her way home. So many nights he stood outside her building as she watched him from her window. He looked at his reflection in the mirror. 'When did I become so desperate?' he asked himself. He felt horrible. In a second, he punched the mirror, shattering the glass as blood trickled down his knuckles.

'Who does she think she is?' He thought, tightening his fist. He felt no pain. 'What does she want me to do? Grovel at her feet? I can’t keep doing this. I am Rishabh Bajaj and if she doesn’t understand me, then maybe she isn’t the right woman for me.' He tried to make himself feel better.

He remembered all the times she refused to meet him, all the times she made him feel like a loser. He always thought he deserved it, so he quietly listened without any complaint. But after everything, if she still couldn’t see how much he loved her then screw it. He told himself. He had made a decision.

“Enough is enough,” he told himself, “No woman is worth this much pain. And I don’t have a lack. I can’t keep doing this all my life.”

*

Prerna sat on her bed feeling sick to her stomach. She recalled their kiss, his passion was something she couldn’t express. She could feel currents in her body till now. She told herself that it would be okay now. “Yes, I love him,” she told herself, “Maybe now that I am accepting this, I can move forward. I know that I can’t get back with him. I can’t trust him. Never.” she sighed. Sometimes she went back to the time when her trust had shattered. That pain was something that felt so fresh every time she remembered it. She had behaved like a stupid teenager who was so blinded by love, that all logic had failed her. The truth was right in front and she couldn’t see it.

'How quickly one person becomes so important in your life and before you realise it, you trust him, blindly, your life starts revolving around him. That’s when reality strikes. This had to happen with me. To teach me this very important lesson in life. Love is good in its place, don’t let it overpower you or else it will always give you pain and regret. If only I had kept my eyes open, if only I hadn’t put him before me every time, if only I had trusted my eyes more than his words, I would have never gotten into this mess. Heartbreak hurts, but when your trust is shattered, you feel numb. You lose faith in humanity. Maybe that’s why I can never trust any man now. How will I ever move past this in my life? '

Prerna was a therapist but when it was about her, she felt that all her theories failed, all that sense was lost and she was just a helpless girl trying to find herself in this big world. It was easy to help others, difficult to apply it to yourself.

She wished someone would help her, she prayed she could meet a person who could show her the way forward because as of now she couldn’t get past this. She helped so many people for a living, maybe one day, someone could help her. This hope kept her going. Some day her pain would lessen, and life would give her a new chance. But that day wasn’t today.

*

“Let’s go out tonight!” Rishabh said the next evening on the phone.

Anurag checked the caller ID again. “Am I talking to the Rishabh Bajaj?” he asked.

Rishabh rolled his eyes. “I’m serious,” he said.

“Exactly! You’re always so serious nowadays. Kya ho gaya hai tujhe?” Anurag said.

“Yes or no?” Rishabh asked, cutting the bullshit. He was determined.

“Yes, yes,” Anurag said, realising his friend was really not in the mood.

“House of Nomad, 10pm?” Rishabh asked.

“Wow, you’re really in the mood!” Anurag said. Rishabh hadn’t asked him to go to a nightclub in ages now. Not since he had returned after his masters.

“I hope you will be too!” Rishabh said as he disconnected the call.

*

Rishabh was already on his third peg of scotch when Anurag reached. He was flirting with a girl who was already all over him. Anurag grinned and shook his head. Just like that, he always gets the girl. What a charmer! He thought as he walked up to Rishabh.

“Hi,” he said, clearly interrupting a fun conversation.

“Finally, tu aa gaya!” Rishabh said, throwing an arm over his shoulder and taking him to the side.

“Clearly, I wasn’t missed!” Anurag grinned.

“Pagal hai kya,” Rishabh understood what he meant. “Bore ho raha tha. She was too easy.” he added.

Anurag rolled his eyes. Typical. He thought. He was happy to see the old Rishabh back but at the same time wondered what had suddenly brought about this change.

“Tu theek hai?” Anurag asked.

“Ofcourse!” Rishabh laughed. “Let’s get you drunk!” he said, pulling him towards the bar.

After 8 drinks and a crazy night, Anurag dropped Rishabh till his car. “Are you sure you’ll reach home? I can book you a cab.”

“No I’m good! Itna tension mat le.” Rishabh said, slapping Anurag playfully. Anurag twitched his lip. Something was definitely up with Rishabh and he had to find out what.

“Call me when you get home,” Anurag said as he helped him into the car.

“Mmm.” Rishabh said, settling himself.

Anurag rolled his eyes. He decided to follow him in his car till Rishabh’s house. Rishabh pressed the accelerator and drove on.

Anurag realised Rishabh was going the wrong way. He sighed and tried to call his friend. He didn’t answer. Anurag tried to overtake Rishabh but he was driving too fast. In about 15 minutes Rishabh pressed the brake and Anurag stopped right behind him. He watched as Rishabh got out of the car, and looked towards the building he stopped in front of. He slowly got off behind Rishabh and stood right beside him, trying to figure out what he was looking at.

A small smile formed on Rishabh’s lips as he sighed and leaned against his car’s bonnet. Anurag followed his gaze and finally spotted Prerna sitting next to her window, reading a book. He was shocked as he looked back at his hopeless friend.

Even in such a drunken state, he had come here, to see her. Anurag sat next to him and asked, “Kya dekh raha hai?”

“Sukoon,” Rishabh said, taking a deep breath.

“What?” Anurag asked, not understanding at all.

“Yaha aake usse dekhta hu, toh lagta hai ghar aa gaya.” he said, stuttering in the middle because he was clearly drunk. A sober Rishabh would never say all this.

Anurag was surprised at what he was hearing. He knew Rishabh really loved this girl but so much? He would have help his friend out. “Chal,” he told Rishabh.

“Shhh,” Rishabh said, “Bas thodi der aur.” he added. He didn’t take his eyes off once. She sat near the window, lost in her book,unaware that two fully grown men sat there, both, staring at her.

*

All feedback is welcome! I hope you enjoyed the update❤️

Thanks for the Update.really it's beautiful.for the first time we see better version of anurag.may be he will help rishab to get prena back.Can't wait for upcoming chapters....

Wow...really nice..........🤗🤗Are you not going to make them together so soon?

Prerna as a girl...it is difficult to make her mind too early since she feels the insecurity around the Rishab.

It meant that she is not going to accept him easily and too early. The hesitation about Rishab's love, his misbehavior and lack of trust on him are more powerful than her love on him at the moment.

Thank you Gulaabi........taking your time to update the story. Great work!!!😃😃

Your an amazing writer. Today’s update was a rollercoaster of emotions. For a moment I really thought Rishabh was going forget Prerna and move on. That scared me for a bit. But Rish went back to his Pre. It was sooo cute. I hope they resolve their problems soon.

Thank you it was amazing !

Oh and you gotta update the other one asap. I need to know who got jealous .

Very interesting update! Lots of feelings and emotions portrayed by Rishab.

Hi.

Great update. loved the confession of Prerna.😳

Poor Rishabh. 😭 For a moment I felt Rishabh was going to leave Prerna and move on. But thank God (and you) that he did not.

But Rishabh went back to Prerna. Wow👍🏼

Amazing update. can't wait to read more

WITH LOVE ❤️

-PRAPTI